Sitting With Strong Feelings- When A Wave Comes Go Deep

This is a guided meditation for a time when you are dealing with a lot of emotion arising within you and not sure what to do with it. We will begin with a spoken section before moving into a personal practice period to support you in sitting with whatever is moving through you right now. You will develop the inner resources and mindset to turn towards your feelings, to not be washed away by them; but to learn to surf them and to come back into finding some sweetness in the human experience.

Transcript

When a wave comes,

Go deep.

When a wave comes,

Dive in deep.

This is a meditation on sitting with strong feelings.

It's designed for a time when you're dealing with a lot of emotion arising and surging within you.

Maybe you're not sure what to do with it or how to be with it.

We will begin this meditation with a spoken section before we move into a personal practice period to support you in sitting with whatever is moving and surging through you right now.

So settle in,

Rest down,

And we will begin.

I live by the ocean.

Each day I walk to where the surfers play in the waves as they carve out their moving magic in the face of these enormous walls of water.

Some days seeing this lifts me up,

Fills me with wonder.

And some days I'm stuck in my own mind,

It's like I can't see the goodness in front of me.

Lost in thought and in feeling,

I'm able to see the big beauty all around me.

Our personal feeling habits can be a kind of set point in our life that can limit us.

Some of us default to numbness,

To not feeling at all.

Some get stuck in swampy sadness or irritability or anger.

I know that when our feelings run free,

They move through us swiftly.

They give us information as to what is needed and guide us as to what the next right action is in our life.

They move through quickly and we end up feeling present,

Potent,

And sort of washed clean by them.

Able to be with the life that's in front of us.

I also know that emotions sometimes seem to come like unstoppable waves,

Seeming like they make drown us,

Push us under.

Like storms are surging for us.

When I go and watch the surfers,

I'm impressed both by their bravery in being out there as they ride those big waves in smooth and skillful ways.

Their boldness and their bravery are being at one with nature.

But the bit that most fascinates me is when they paddle out,

Laying down on their board paddling out through the waves,

Before they sit out there and wait for those waves to come in that they may ride.

As they paddle out,

Wave after wave requires them to paddle through it,

Surging above their head,

Water dumping down on them,

Smacking them in the face time after time.

There's a saying that these surfers have when they're paddling out,

And they say,

When a wave comes,

Go deep.

When a wave comes,

Go deep.

Anyone who has ever swum in strong seas will know this.

We do not try and swim straight through the middle of a crashing wave that is breaking down on us.

We have to surrender to it.

And the right way through is to duck underneath the surface of the wave where there is smoother waters.

There are three things that you can do with big waves,

Whether those are waves of emotion or waves of water.

You can try and run from it.

But it will catch you and knock you down eventually.

It will draw you under and put you through the rinse cycle.

You can also fall back on your ego.

Try and stand your ground against the wave of feeling arising within you.

Push it away.

But eventually it will smack into you.

Drench water in your face.

Drown you as you try and fiercely fight it,

Leaving you exhausted by your efforts.

When the waves of feeling arise,

We can take wise action and duck under.

We can dare to go deeper.

We can transform ourselves to match the circumstances.

We can dive into smoother waters for healing,

Knowing that we will pop up again in time.

We will have been washed clean by it all.

We will pop back up into the sweet sun.

Trust in this when a wave comes go deep.

So now let us paddle into our practice period with our feelings.

Let us take our meditation seats.

Let us be bold.

And come meet these waves of feeling and wonder at them today.

Come into a comfortable position.

Sit up straight.

Get good and grounded in this moment.

We begin to feel our feelings wisely by coming into the physical.

Into the visceral,

Into the body.

It is in our body that we meet the waves of emotion.

That we meet what is rising up within us,

What feels like it might drown us.

What feels like it is storming and surging.

As you sit,

Feel the strength that you have within you.

Feel the length of your spine.

Burn your shoulders and open your chest.

Notice the strength in your arms and the muscles of your thighs.

Notice that life force and strength,

Whatever age or size or shape body you are in.

This body is a good body.

It has seen me through a lot.

There is strength in here.

It is the home for your heart.

Feel where you touch the surfaces under you.

Feel your breath moving all by itself.

This unstoppable life force of breath coming in and coming out.

We do not have to do anything.

We are graced with breath moving.

Bring your attention to the breath.

Is it shallow or deep?

Are you tensing up?

Breathing hard?

Is your breath slow or quick?

As we come to go deep and dive under,

We will need a few good deep breaths to sustain us as we paddle into these waves of feeling today.

So take a good deep gulp of air.

Let it sink into your lungs and sigh out.

And a few more.

Breathe in and breathe out.

Savor that you can deepen your breath,

That you can gulp in the air of this moment.

That your chest widens,

That the body gets enervated,

Oxygenated.

That resources come when we breathe deep.

Take a few more good deep breaths of this air today as you sit here.

And bring your attention to your torso,

To the physical felt sensations of our body.

Sometimes we use feelings and sensations interchangeably.

Today I want to present that feelings can mean our emotions,

The mad,

Sad,

Bad and glad feelings.

And that feelings can also mean the physical sensations arising in our body.

Maybe butterflies in our stomach,

Maybe strength within us,

Fire rising up.

The feelings we have from being in a body.

These sensations of being in a body are where we get lost in our emotions.

When it feels too much to be with the sensations,

We come up to our mind,

To the story.

We get lost in the swirl.

If the feelings feel like they're looming too large on the horizons,

Racing towards us full of power or depth,

We get in denial,

We disassociate,

We space out or we numb down.

Filling ourselves with food or shopping or scrolling.

Feel your body here,

Now,

As best you can.

Feel the sensations of being in a body.

The sensations of being in a body.

We may not have quite the right words to describe them.

They're subtle and hard to track.

Feel the back of the body,

The side of the body,

The heart,

The belly,

The jaw.

Sit here.

Sit still.

Stay with yourself.

Notice if it feels uncomfortable to be with what's arising in your body.

Notice if you're getting critical,

This isn't right.

Notice if you want to check your phone.

Notice if you're planning something,

You want to get up,

You want to walk away.

Notice the discomfort.

Stay close with what you do when a feeling arises.

Notice if you start running a story.

But who did what and why and what you need to do about it and what it means about your childhood and how you're going to fix it.

Stop it.

I mean,

Stop the thinking.

Move away from the mind and back to feeling will flow through us if we let it.

The mind is the place we get stuck in.

Come back to pelvis,

Back,

Belly,

Back of the body,

Side of the body,

Front of the heart,

Shoulders,

Face,

Limbs,

Fingers,

Toes,

Feeling,

Being here.

The body is full of power and depth.

It is where feelings move through.

By allowing physical sensations,

We get the good guidance from our feelings.

By moving through our feelings in a skillful way,

We get the life force flowing back through us.

We'll sit quietly for a few minutes and let the full force of sensation in the body land here.

Stay still with it just for these next few minutes.

Bit by bit,

You're building your muscles at feeling these waves of feeling.

See what is in motion here.

Welcome it in.

Not the story,

But the sensation.

Come home to your heart.

Come close to yourself.

Be with you.

Be with it.

Be in this moment,

Whether that is the burn of anger or the tenderness of longing,

Or some savage or sweet sorrow,

Or a mug of fresh joy being served up to you.

Stay close to it.

Open to it.

Widen to it.

Allow it to get wilder.

Turn towards it.

Do not have to let this feeling slam into you.

Duck gently down.

Dive gracefully into the depths of it.

Surrender into it sweetly.

Take a big breath and swim in it a little.

I promise you that you will bob up again in time.

But for now,

Dive deep.

Feel the feelings of being here,

Being alive,

Having a human heart.

I know it seems scary and uncomfortable sometimes,

But you've got this.

You're learning how to dive deep,

To be washed clean,

To find a good way through the waves of your own life.

Sometimes the waves look like denial or disassociation or dissatisfaction,

As much as pure emotion.

Whatever is arising,

Keep taking big gulps of breath,

Feeling your body sinking into the deep,

Deep,

Deep blue of this moment.

As you turn into the feeling,

Feel the full force of it and duck under.

See how it might feel like it's rushing and ravaging through you,

And yet just under the surface as you meet it is still a water.

But there can be some calm to be found amidst all of these sensations.

That by turning and diving deep,

Paradoxically,

We find a safer passage through.

It is by trusting our sensations that the body can negotiate our way through this.

That we can swim through it with a modicum of grace.

And if,

As you sit here,

What feels like it is arising within you is just too hard,

Then come back.

Come back to feeling your feet,

Your seat,

The chair,

The place you're sitting,

Your spine.

We're not looking to stay and re-traumatize ourselves with feeling here.

We're looking to touch in and come back to titrate our way through our feelings bit by bit.

We're looking to learn to navigate the waves,

Not to drown in them.

If you get lost,

Come to your physical senses.

What can you see and smell and touch?

As we learn to surf the waves of our feelings,

Sometimes we dive in deep and sometimes just a sweet little sec comes through,

Bringing beauty into our day.

We don't have to drown in them.

And the way to avoid getting lost in the depths of our feelings is by staying in our body with them.

Not in our mind or the story,

But in our muscles,

In our belly,

In our heart,

In this place,

In this present moment.

Not back then or out there in the future,

But here,

Sitting,

Feeling you're doing so good.

I see you and your practice finding a good way.

Being brave.

We're learning this bit by bit,

Session by session,

Set by set.

So as we come towards the end of this practice period,

Drink in a few deeper breaths.

Come back up towards the surface.

Open your eyes and land in this moment,

In this place where you're sitting,

Listening.

Come back up some.

We're in partnership with surfing our feelings.

It's us and the waves of them.

They don't have to drown us or we don't have to deny the waves.

We're learning to be gracious with them,

To ride the wild waves of our own nature,

To be with the beauty and the flow and the wild ride that can happen with that.

Feel the buoyancy that comes when we bounce back up having gone down a little.

We face our feelings bit by bit,

Wave by wave.

We're getting stronger.

We're finding a way through it.

We're finding how our feeling muscles get grown.

We're being washed clean by swimming in the depths within us.

We're getting more skillful,

More heartful,

Wiser.

We're finding flow in ourselves,

Meeting ourselves more.

Moving towards heartfulness,

Joy and hope.

Feelings are the key to the depth of life and learning to be with them is part of unlocking the fullness of the heart.

So give thanks for this surge you've sat through today.

Notice what you have managed to navigate.

Notice the badassery within you for being with it.

Notice your bravery.

Even if it's hard,

You stayed with it.

You turned towards it.

Learning to surf the waves.

I want to thank you for your explorations.

The world needs humans in touch with ourselves so we can be here for ourselves,

So we can be here for each other.

Thank you for your practice.

It makes a difference.

Thank you for your heart.

It makes a difference.

Thank you for being here.

It makes a difference.

May the waves be sweet with you today.

May you have a beautiful ride through.

Reviews

this is such an encouraging and empowering practice tess, thank you very very much! 💞

So supportive. You took scary and made it lose its grip. Oceans of love. 💙🩵🌊

This guided meditation came in perfect time. It helped me to release the guilt of neglecting deep emotions. Thank you!

Oh Tess, I want to thank you for this medi. It's so descriptive and visual, which I am drawn to. May we both ride our waves in gratitude, and go deep in thankfulness to our feelings.
Namaste 🙏

Beautiful, cathartic what a new way to look at life & emotions thank you 🙏

Beautiful and helpful practice. Thank you and Blessings 💜 🌊🕊️

Loved this! I can see using this meditation on a regular basis. Thank you!

That was profound, thank you. For a man who wants to go deeper into his emotions and look what's there, it was just enough.

Thank you 🙏

Isn't it just so interesting when the meditation one chooses for the morning is just the one needed! Thank you for this valued message and recognition. Striving for Grace. I am so blessed with a beautiful life and I can dive deep when big feelings are there. Thank you! Namaste 🌺🙏🌺

So wonderful I love the water. I was floating at times.

I love this whole sequence so much. And thank you for reminding us our practice, our being here, makes a difference.