Learning To Let Go -Surrendering What We Cannot Control

A meditation to increase peace of mind- by learning to let go of all the things that we can’t control. We practice dropping the thoughts of things that tie us up in knots -and instead, we cultivate self-care by being in the present moment. It may be particularly supportive for those in recovery and anyone going through times of intense stress and worry. It will soothe the nervous system and support you in coming back into contact with a more peaceful place inside of you.

Transcript

This is a meditation on letting go and letting life,

And getting the gifts that come with surrendering the things we can't control.

It will start with a short spoken section,

A practice period.

Sometimes we hold on because we don't trust that life has got us.

And sometimes we're right,

Terrible things have happened.

We get knocked badly by things and we have to find our own way through.

At other times our holding on is a fear response when we've been hurt.

We dare not trust life again.

We can end up conflicted and controlling,

Running around obsessing over things,

Trying to get the universe to do our will.

It can leave us tight,

Caught up in circles.

Sometimes letting things go,

Loosening our grip,

Makes way for things to turn out in the best way possible.

When I talk about surrendering I'm not saying don't do your part.

We must dream and dare and do.

We must show up,

Do the task,

Take action,

Put ourselves out there,

Try our best.

All of that is right responsibility.

And yet sometimes despite all of that we discover we can't change the laws of the universe.

But reality will do what it does.

We can do our best and things won't always turn out the way we want them to.

We both have immense personal power.

We're also simultaneously powerless over people,

Places and things.

One of the ways that we can hold on is with our minds.

We obsess over things.

We think about them over and over.

We talk about them with our friends.

We plan scenarios.

We have ruminatory thoughts.

We might reckon if we think hard enough about something we can solve the unsolvable.

Sadly it's not so.

Paradoxically when we let go things can sometimes turn out way better than we expect when we're holding on tight.

When we let go of obsessing with our mind we can come into the feeling of what's happening in our hearts.

That might give us new intuition on it,

New inspiration,

New solutions.

Often it can be uncomfortable to realize how powerless we are over life.

It can be a tender and troubling thing.

And yet sometimes surrendering can bring great unforeseen goodness through.

When we stop obsessing over people and places and problems what we get left with is ourselves.

With our own life force energy we get to come home to our own heart.

To do our own inner work.

To be with whatever it is we need to heal.

Sometimes letting go is a thing we'll need to do time after time.

A thing that brings us back into finding some peace in this moment.

It may not fix everything forever.

We don't know how the future will turn out.

Yet once we've done our part we'd be wise to let things go to not obsess.

So come to a seated meditation position.

Take a deep breath.

Settle.

Soften your shoulders.

If it feels okay close your eyes.

Soften one part of your body.

Maybe your shoulders.

Maybe your hands.

Maybe your belly.

We don't have to be perfectly relaxed.

We just practice letting go of one part bit by bit.

Deepen your breath.

Notice if your mind is whirling and swirling about some problem.

Just for the next five minutes commit to letting that go.

To a short five minute practice of being in the present moment.

Notice the way the belly rises and falls.

The way that the body takes care of breathing.

That we breathe ourselves.

Know that we can't control the future even though we may have actions to take.

Soften your hands almost as if you're metaphorically letting something drop.

Practice letting the thoughts go and coming back to the sensations of being in a body.

If you find yourself really anxious or caught up in knots inside then practice being present with a room outside of you.

The place in which you're sitting.

If it feels right put one hand on your heart.

Offer yourself some comfort.

Some reassurance that things will work out well.

Be kind to the part of your brain that races on and thinks about things.

There's likely fear or anxiety underneath.

Bring some compassion to this human heart.

Once again practice letting go.

Letting go of the thoughts.

Letting them drop.

Letting the body soften.

Letting yourself find your way back into this moment.

Our meditation practice is that of letting go of thoughts a thousand times,

A million times and coming back to the present each time you've made progress.

If it helps visualize yourself giving this problem to something greater than you.

You can hand it to life or to the mystery or to some kind of higher power.

Almost like you're posting your problems into some kind of letterbox and letting something else handle it.

Come back to self.

To your body breathing.

We can't control the whole universe but we can come to care for ourselves.

To sit with compassion with whatever it is we're going through.

To learn to take care of that which we can take care of ourselves.

And to let go of feeling responsible for everything that we can't control.

Like the rest of the universe.

Think about surrender as softening.

Softening your eyes.

Softening your body.

Softening into this moment.

Think about surrender as letting things be.

Once we have done our part we let go and let life.

Think about surrender as stopping the struggle.

Know that when we sit and practice meditation we practice peace.

We practice self-care.

We practice turning away from the things we can't control and cultivate care within us.

Sitting here body breathing.

Practicing coming back a thousand times.

We've been sitting for about five minutes now and notice how you are.

Maybe you feel a little kinder.

A little softer.

A little calmer.

But maybe you've let go a little bit.

Letting go is a practice.

We practice not holding on so tight.

We practice not tying ourselves up in knots.

We practice giving whatever we're worried about to something greater than us.

We practice being human and finding good ways through our own problems.

Thank you for your practice here today.

Thank you for investigation into what happens if you let go and let life lead a little more.

Notice if you feel a little better.

And as you go forth throughout your day practice letting go.

Practice letting it be.

Practice letting it drop.

Doing what we can and then giving it over.

Practice self-care.

Practice self-compassion.

Practice learning better ways to lower our stress levels and be human.

I thank you for showing up for your practice.

For learning a new skill.

For being part of this community.

I wish you much wellness with whatever it is you're walking through.

May you be well.

May you be happy.

May you be free from harm and suffering.

Reviews

Genuine, loving, beautiful advice and meditation ❤️

I'm in the midst of releasing the thoughts and opinions of other people. I thank you for this. I needed it.

Just what I needed this morning! Thank you for your guidance.

Thank you for a meaningful short talk and meditation; allowing me to soften, surrender, and returning to life’s lead. I’ll need to return often, I just would like to know whom to release it all to…

It truly is difficult to let go of things one cannot control. Your meditation helped me. With a little practice of switching the mind set realizing that relaxing some control is important for self compassion, I will get there. Thank you. Namaste 🙏

Lovely. Thank you. Nice pace. I loved visualizing putting my worries in a letter and placing it in a mailbox.

Wow! I've been stressing about something with my adult son that I cannot change or control. Finally...some clarity and peace! Thank you

Thank you so much Tess. Your words resonate with me completely. This will be so helpful for me.
🙏♥️🕊

Perfect for my current situation and overall. Job change, financial and relationship issues creating obsessive thoughts. Loved the idea of handing it over to a higher power

Thank you for this practice 🙏🏼💝 It is a gift to me this morning as I struggle with letting go around my son's active addiction, and the stress and fear I have around that. Deep gratitude💖

Thank you so much. This is exactly what I need in this time of life and helped me immensely.

This was exactly what I needed today. Thank you so very much!

Beautiful pointings and meditation. With Appreciation.🙏🏼

Thank you for a great meditation and a reminder of how I must let go of all things around me I cannot control if I am going to have any serenity and calm in my life. I try to stay in the efforts business not in the results business and let go of control.