Setting Our Self Free From Untrue Roles

Do you feel stuck in relationships or situations in your life? I understand this. This is a talk centered around false roles. It's a beginning conversation to inspire you to look inward regarding ancient roles such as the good boy or good girl, the good son or good daughter, the performer, the loyal friend, etc. Can we learn to set ourSelf free? My hope is this talk inspires you to seek and pray for the courage to honor your heart calling to your authentic Self. Stay blessed!

Transcript

Hi everyone,

Welcome to Insight Timer and the page of Beau Baker.

Nice to have you back for some of my more regulars that come to my lives who have been requesting that I do some more,

Some conversations about some things that I've mentioned on my lives and here we are.

So I'm glad you found your way here.

Enjoy what I hope is a beautifully aligned talk that is inspired by my heart and my own experience as of late.

And this is about roles.

The roles that we live by.

Where are we imprisoned by the roles and misidentifications of our own mind,

Unknowingly?

What do I mean by this?

I just recently sold everything I owned,

Aside from keeping a small amount of clothes and some camping gear,

And have set out on a pilgrimage in the direction of north and really this centers around learning to trust and or find the authentic me.

And I don't mean the authentic me in a body,

In a skin suit.

I mean that authentic spirit nature,

The Christ self,

The awakened self,

The one self with a capital O,

With a capital S.

The nature that is beyond our skin suit,

It's beyond our nationalities,

Our skin color,

Our pronouns,

Our sexual orientation,

And all the seeming laws of the world.

For a long time,

While I've definitely done many things that I wanted to do of my own will,

Of the self will,

I realized that there was a long call in my heart to really go and kind of explore and have an adventure from the calling of inside my own heart.

I would be in nature in the middle of the mountains and I would just kind of feel this felt state of this,

We like this,

We enjoy this.

But many of the things over the years that I have felt kind of a deep rush to put into reality in my life,

I didn't do and I wasn't sure why.

And it really came down to roles.

Now if you've listened to my lives or any of my tracks before,

Then you know that where I speak from as of late is the metaphysical spiritual text,

A Course in Miracles.

And I don't think it has a monopoly on what I'm about to say,

But in my humble opinion,

Many divine teachers and masters and spiritual teachings,

When you get to their essence,

The essence before human beings take their own intellect and seeming understanding and call it fact in reality.

The unified truth,

The absolute truth beneath the words,

Beneath the intellect.

And we feel into that there is this divine totality,

There is this creative intelligence,

There is this force of good we call God.

Some might define it as I do as unchanging love,

Eternal love,

Meaning a love that does not oscillate.

It extends infinitely and always extends.

It creates through extension and what it creates is endowed with all of the same qualities of the Creator.

This divine nature,

Our true essence,

I believe is one with God,

One with the divine.

Which means our holy self,

Our Christ self is a self that is limitless in love.

It's unassailable,

Meaning unharmable,

It's unchangeable.

It is the very source of itself.

It needs nothing,

It wants nothing.

It misses nothing.

To miss and to want and to need at the deepest level implies that I have at a deeper level a belief that says I've made something of myself that is impossible.

I am an incomplete separate being from source and I now don't have the quality that I was created in and with.

And what does this mean?

It means that I lack the love that I was created in.

I have failed this divine creation and now I need to earn it back.

But it's all,

I've realized that lifetime after lifetime it seems that we have conditioned ourselves to live from these myriad of roles,

The multitude of roles.

But first it starts out with the deepest misidentification of all.

Being identified as a separate being,

Not one with life,

Not divine in essence and limitless,

But a separate being.

And this separate being has its own past,

Its own private thoughts,

Its own beliefs,

Its own ideals,

And that keeps me,

My own God,

Separate from you.

And there you are,

You have your kingdom,

I have my kingdom.

You have your laws,

I have my laws.

You have your beliefs,

I have my beliefs.

A world of separation,

The dualistic dream.

The Course in Miracles would say that ultimately the soul had a very quick dream that's already ended.

But in this dream the governing body is the ego thought system,

The fear system,

The devil system,

The direct opposite of infinite love.

But what happens is I have this kind of ideology embedded in me that I think has been built lifetime after lifetime,

Where it all is in the basis of you did mess up,

But that's okay,

You can earn it back.

But to earn it back,

To sacrifice to get it back,

I must still be believing in a deeper ultimate belief that I did lose it.

Therefore I am believing that I successfully accomplished the impossible.

I have made of infinite love changing love.

I have made of infinite love fear.

I have made of eternal life death.

And what are the roles that I fall into?

Playing the good son,

Playing the earthly useful savior,

The fixer,

The problem solver,

The good boy,

The good girl,

The loyal friend,

The dutiful role.

We do it out of a sense of duty.

And what I didn't realize is that a lot of the biggest things in my life that I wanted to take action on,

Really when it came down to it,

I was terrified to do it.

Why?

Because somehow I believed that to listen to my own heart would be to fail you.

That already agreed upon belief in my mind now that I failed the divine,

That I made of myself something I'm not.

And I'm guilty and now I need to earn it back by solving you,

By helping you,

By fixing the problems in the world.

I can earn back my divine nature.

But then I fall into roles that can never fulfill this because the truth is you can't disown what God gives.

This is the lie.

And the greatest abandonment of all is the capital S,

The self abandonment.

When our true self,

All it wants to do is live big,

Live free,

Live joyously,

Follow its heart and invite holiness and innocence to cradle all that we do.

But I found myself in a state thinking,

I can't act on this because to do so would be to abandon them.

It would be to fail them.

They might not be there with their love when I get back.

Play the good boy,

Play the good son,

Play the dutiful role.

And there's nothing inherently wrong with playing these roles,

But the pain and anger that I feel afterwards is what?

It's the same ego system that convinced me I successfully separated from the divine.

It's the same system that convinced me to play these roles,

But then secretly I blame the world and blame other people for the anger and frustration I feel because the ego needs something outside of me to be the reason that I'm feeling this anger and pain.

When all along,

What I don't realize is it's the anger and pain from abandoning my heart,

From abandoning the calling.

So really for me today,

This talk was about speaking about roles.

For everyone that comes here this morning or tonight,

Wherever you are,

To really pause and look out because in my experience,

The Course in Miracles says everything outside of you is an outward projection of your inner reality.

You're not ever triggered by something somebody did that as you would define it,

It's literally a mirror for what you already believed in you about yourself or the world.

I'm not enough.

I'm a failure.

I don't deserve this.

Fear of abandonment,

Fear of not being safe,

Fear that I'm not safe,

Fear that I'm a burden to the world.

These myriad of roles.

And then as a result in my childhood,

By agreeing with these misbeliefs,

I then created the role that the ego so sneakily puts into our mind.

And I played the role that it told me if I played it good enough,

I could be free.

But we don't know any better and we imprison ourself to this role.

We imprison ourself to this role.

And so I encourage you to look into your life and see where your ego mind wants you to always think it's some person or situation,

But they're just mirroring more than likely the prison you've kept yourself in by these ancient agreements that you were taught.

And some of you may already know this deep down and it's been terrifying to you to think,

Can I walk into the world?

And I'm not saying everybody is meant to leave the person they're with or leave the job they're with or leave the situation to honor or to stop living a false role.

Because we can start to do this within the situations that we're in.

We can just simply say,

I don't want to live by this role anymore.

We can go to holistic therapy or 12 step codependent therapy programs that teach us how to start to look at where we wanted the world to be to blame for why we were living a role we didn't know we somehow thought was what we were supposed to do.

But we thought that.

Nobody put it in our mind.

It just seemingly kind of came out of nowhere.

And we can do the work to look inward and it doesn't really help in my experience to figure out why.

I've seen a lot of people break into tears just at hearing these roles.

Yes,

I feel a prisoner to this role,

But I feel I'm going to hurt them.

I'm going to abandon them.

And this is a lie of the mind.

In reality,

We all share the same mind.

There's only one divine mind sleeping this seeming fragmentation of billions of separate minds.

In reality,

The greatest thing we could all do is put down the false roles of other and really honor the heart's call.

We can still serve the world,

But we can't really serve the world when we're serving it from a false identified role.

Because then what happens?

My service is full of anger.

My service is full of expectation.

Fear and loss.

And all we have to do is check in with our emotional feeling state within our life.

If we seemingly lately experience lots of anger and frustration,

Well then this means we haven't really been getting to the core of our own unconscious mind where these misbeliefs and these misidentified roles that we live by are fueling the direction that we continue to take.

These roles can play into the friendships we stay in,

The relationships we keep getting in.

We're trying to solve the now with the past roles that we don't know how to stop playing in.

And you can do deep work around this.

Mom work,

Dad work,

Intergenerational trauma work.

But most importantly,

I just wanted to come on and leave a track for those that might find their way to my profile that really says,

There's no outer world.

There's no outer person.

There's no outer situation that is the cause of your life.

If you really want to find freedom,

It starts with really turning inward and saying,

Spirit,

Father,

Mother,

God,

I am willing to take responsibility with you.

I am willing to truly learn to trust you to guide me inside the inside path,

The inner way,

To look inward into my consciousness,

Into my heart,

And really see the prison that I've kept myself in.

Help me to see.

And then it will bring the right people in your path.

It'll bring the right circumstances.

And it will do it on the divine timing.

It knows not to do something that would terrify you.

We take baby steps with Spirit,

Not big giant leaps.

So really,

I just wanted to come here and share a track about the roles.

It doesn't really help us to go in and excavate the deeper understanding of what it means to play the good son or the good daughter or the good boy or the good girl.

But what I will say about some of these is a lot of times with parents,

There was emotional and verbal and sometimes physical abuse.

And somewhere in our childhood,

We,

A,

We decided there must be something inherently wrong with us.

And then we decided that the only way that we would know how to keep the peace,

To earn the approval,

Validation and love and kind of peaceful environment that we like is to just play the role of the good son or the good daughter or vice versa,

The good parent.

How do I keep my children happy?

I just do the right thing from a place of duty.

It's not about how,

It's really not about what we do at all,

But it is where we do it from.

What's the operating system?

Is it the anger,

Dualistic,

Ego,

Fear,

Separation,

Scarcity,

Not enough?

Basically the misidentified self that's fueling the way we live.

And when you're the good son or the good daughter or the loyal friend,

I had abuse in my childhood and I really learned that the only way I could ever try to feel like I was normal and equal with other guys was to just be and do and say whatever they kind of agreed was okay.

Because I was carrying around a belief that A,

There was something inherently wrong with me and B,

Here's the role,

As I talked about earlier,

That I taught myself that I needed to be to get back,

To earn back that divine nature.

I wasn't even worried about the divine nature.

It was just like,

Can I be equal with these fellow humans?

And look,

When you get far enough down the spiritual path,

You realize that ultimately it's all a lie.

That the true nature is infinite,

That it is the divine holy Christ nature that all the masters,

Including Jesus taught,

That you and I are one in the same,

That you will do greater works than even I did.

Because it knew that the evolution of the awakening of this one mind that we share,

It's the only real possibility.

It's not a matter of if we are going to wake up from this grand dream of humanness,

This spiritual coma.

It's not a matter of if,

It's just as we seemingly in our fragmented state all start to realize that the only role that we can truly play and feel at peace is the one shared divine role.

There is no other role to play.

And that maybe just maybe the way we learn gently in time to re-embody this divine role is to stop living all the false roles,

To find the right people and circumstances that motivate the courage in us to take a leap,

To move in the direction of our heart,

To figure out what our heart even wants for us and stop judging and measuring ourself by this system of negativity and falsity that is all ego made.

Do you think infinite love has a measuring kit?

It only knows that the quality that it is is and endowed with is infinite love.

Measuring is of the ego.

But for now,

Since we live in a world that measures,

We take progress,

Spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection,

As they say in the 12-step rooms.

So I hope this has been helpful for you.

I hope something has resonated.

Look inward and be willing to reach out to me on my profile if you want.

If you need some advice or direction,

Everything is by donation only.

If you need some real guidance,

A one-on-one,

You can scroll over to the about part on my homepage and reach out to me.

But I hope anybody that found their way to this will feel into sometimes just realizing that we are living a misidentified role.

That's a celebration in itself.

We don't need to go into shame or blame or guilt when we notice,

My God.

We might experience pain or sadness or burst into tears or anger.

And that's okay to let that out,

To feel into that,

But release it in a healthy way.

Share it with other people.

Don't hold it in.

It's by sharing the shadow with other that the light exumes and releases what was really never real to begin with.

But we can't hide it in a bunker.

Feel into the role and where maybe you can take a courageous next step,

Just the next step to releasing yourself.

If you need a 12 step support codependent community,

If you need a therapist,

If you need a holistic coach or someone to help hold you in a container while you step into deeper levels of courage,

Know that you are held.

Know that the spirit loves you.

Know that the truth of you is divine and infinite and unchanging,

And you never truly disinherited this one divine role we share.

Many,

Most of us in the world are in a prison of roles that we've been teaching ourselves to play for lifetimes,

But the world is ready.

We're ready to let ourself out of these roles,

Give ourself permission to shine.

So have a beautiful rest of the day wherever you are in the world.

If anything resonated today,

Remember you don't have to put it into practice.

Spirit will do it through you.

Everything,

Spirit,

Help me to let my heart and mind receive the gift that was here for me.

And if there's any action to take,

Take it for me.

Help me to know,

Bring the intuitive thought,

Bring the right person,

Bring the right circumstance.

Do that for me.

Give me the courage and the willingness to see these roles and to release them in your divine timing under grace in perfect ways.

Have a beautiful,

Beautiful rest of your morning or day wherever you are.

And maybe I'll see you on one of my lives soon.

Be blessed.

Reviews

Thank you for this talk, Beau. I am glad I just happened to to in your live today . It was meant to be. J in needed to hear the confirmation that I am not alone and we are all one , one consciousness, one love.
Much love and gratitude to you for your teaching ❤️❤️❤️🙏🙏🙏

This was a great listen again after your live last night on roles and so much more about we are defending, wow so grateful for you, 🙏🏼 Beau. I feel it’s time to book another one on one session. I’m hiding behind my roles! One in particular, isolating when not working “so I can work on my spiritual path” … I had no idea what I was doing is still driven by my ego and I still do t quite “get” this yet. Love and light to you! ❤️🙏🏼

This is the second one of your talks that I has listened to. Extremely helpful, I must say! I have been working 12 step program for 12 years and my spiritual life has grown and expanded and changed over the years. Thank you for making this available I did try to ferret out the Podcasts you did in 2020 but they were unavailable… would be very interested in listening to those too!

Interesting. I will continue feeling into this path.
Namaste 🙏

That was really great it helped me to identify false roles I’ve been playing thank you Beau!

It was perfect timing for me. Resonated so much. Thank you

To the point and removing the sense of separation. We are all one. Thank you for the reminder 🙏

A Powerful message and reminder to listen to ourselves, remember who we are, as one. Thank you.

Thank you Beau. That really resonates with me

This is clutch stuff, glad I looked you up. Fascinated by your journey, hope to hear more. May it reveal all you seek.