Loving Curiosity To Cure Inner Distress

Learn how loving curiosity can be practiced to allow, explore and release unpleasant, present-moment sensations. Often we run from a tight chest or belly thinking we'd rather not be with the anxiety. You'll see here that it's best to explore the sensations vs run from them. After all, the "only way out is through" and that "being with" is beautiful, relieving, and healing.
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Transcript

This is Eric,

And welcome to a meditation on curiosity.

So we'll just talk for a couple minutes and give you an introduction into what this practice is going to be about,

And then we'll have a nice guided meditation.

So curiosity,

What a great theme,

Right?

So what we're talking about here is curiosity in relationship to mindfulness with present moment awareness.

So when we tune into our body,

Eventually we're going to want to get curious about present moment feelings in the body.

And before that,

Though,

There's a little formula here to share with you called RAIN by Tara Brach.

It's a great acronym.

And first,

This is a mindfulness practice.

So this is about recognize is the R.

So first we kind of have to stop what we're doing.

So say in everyday life,

You're just doing life,

Working,

Being with your kids,

Whatever's going on.

And maybe there's some stress in the body or anxiety or just all these normal arisings that we have.

So what we want to do is first kind of stop,

And then we have to take the first step of RAIN,

Which is R,

Which is recognize.

So we have to notice what's going on in our body with our feelings.

Usually we're just running so fast.

We look externally to try to relieve ourselves.

But what we want to learn to do is to drop in to the present moment and recognize what's going on.

It could be,

Say,

A tightness in the chest.

Let's use that for now.

And then the A is allow.

So A is allow.

So that just means to instead of fight what you're feeling inside,

Instead of pushing it away,

Which is our normal tendency,

Probably,

When we're not practicing,

I don't want to feel that because we're animals before we're thinkers,

Right?

So we want to avoid all those feelings.

But instead what we want to do here is the exact opposite.

I know it's a big request,

But we want to start to allow the feeling.

So in this case,

The tight chest,

We allow that feeling.

I is investigate.

And this is where the theme of curiosity comes in.

I know it's not an I,

But we're focused on curiosity today as the general meditation.

That investigation,

Curiosity,

That's kind of the way that you look at present moment experience in your body.

And then N is nurture.

So we're going to bring tons of kindness to our experience.

We're going to soften around it.

So here we go into the curiosity practice for today.

Let's focus on that part.

If you look at it like rain,

First we recognize,

Allow,

Investigate,

Nurture.

So investigate,

In this case,

Is going to be curiosity.

Let's get curious about what's going on right now.

So just to give you a tip before we dive into the guided meditation,

You want to get curious.

So say in this example,

It's just a tight chest feeling,

Right?

Curiosity is going to look something like,

Is it hot?

Where is this tightness?

Is it like right in the center of my chest or is it more like spread out?

Is it vibrating?

Is it moving?

Curious.

You know,

Without any judgment,

That's important too with mindfulness.

You're not judging what you experience.

You're just looking at it with curiosity.

You're not thinking to try to figure out what's going on.

You're just looking with a feeling of curiosity,

Of wonder.

And it's kind of imbued with love too.

You care about yourself so much that you're curious about your present moment experience.

And what usually happens,

Not because you want to make these feelings go away,

That's important.

You're just so open to being with,

Curious,

Exploring,

That they usually take care of themselves.

They'll just kind of dissolve in your curiosity and your attention and your love.

So let's jump into a guided practice now.

So that's,

I feel like enough talk about what we're dealing with today to focus on a practice with curiosity.

This session will last about six to seven minutes.

And I'm going to ring a bell to start our session together.

And we're going to focus on curiosity for this guided practice.

So enjoy.

So take a comfortable,

Upright posture.

And I'll ring the bell and then I'll walk you through the meditation.

Hmm.

So here we go.

Comfortable upright posture.

There's no rules that you have to sit cross-legged on the floor.

If you're in a chair,

That's just great.

You could lie down,

But keep your eyes open if you lie down so you don't fall asleep.

You could even stand up if you're really tired.

You know,

But if you can,

Seated's nice,

Either cross-legged or in a chair.

The main thing not to get too much into posture is just a nice straight spine.

And then like I'm doing,

Gently close your eyes.

Or if you want,

You can keep them just gently open about halfway with your gaze down in front of you.

That's personal preference.

I like to close my eyes when I practice.

So let's start with three deep breaths.

In through the nose,

Out through the mouth is usually very,

Very grounding and healing.

So let's do that.

Audible exhales are welcome.

This next one,

Make it the most relieving exhale you can possibly imagine.

When you're ready,

Let the breath return to normal.

Now we're just feeling the weight of our bottom on the cushion.

Letting the breath just do its own thing.

Aware of it coming in and moving out.

Kind of like the ocean on a calm day.

Breath just coming in and then going out.

Just becoming very aware of your weight right now,

Of gravity.

See if you can allow yourself to become 10% heavier right now.

Sometimes it helps on the exhale to allow that feeling of groundedness,

Settledness.

So really feeling solid like a mountain.

We'll just do a brief body scan to drop you into mindfulness and then we can get into the curiosity practice,

Our theme for today.

Just notice your toes.

Maybe wiggle your right,

The toes on your right foot and then the toes on your left foot.

Breathing in,

Breathing out,

Become of your feet.

Become aware of your feet.

Maybe they feel warm or cool.

Maybe there's a little pressure on them if you're sitting cross-legged.

Maybe you notice they're just hanging out there in the open.

It's really getting into the breath and into the feeling of your body.

And next,

Notice your calves.

Maybe flex the right calf and the left back and forth a little.

Breathing in,

Breathing out,

Aware of the shins.

If you're cross-legged,

Maybe you notice a little pressure or contact with the ground.

If you're seated,

Maybe you feel someone standing,

Lying down.

Maybe it feels different.

Move up to your thighs.

Maybe flex your right thigh then your left.

It's just designed to get you embodied.

Feel those big muscles,

The right and the left thigh.

Notice the back of the legs.

Notice your bottom and how your sitz bones make contact with your cushion or the ground if you're lying down.

Again,

Feeling that solid like a mountain feeling.

And then slowly moving up,

Notice the belly and it rises and falls.

So as you breathe in,

The belly rises.

As you breathe out,

The belly falls.

Maybe we stay here for a few rounds of breath.

You can just know rising and falling.

Slowly feel the belly rise and then feel it fall.

And then we continue our journey up the body.

Maybe notice the back body right now and as you breathe,

You don't just feel the breath in the lungs,

You actually feel it in the back body too,

Expanding into your back on the inhale,

Releasing on the exhale.

Moving up,

Moving towards the front,

Notice the chest as it rises and falls with each breath.

But then you're so good at this practice.

You notice with mindfulness that your breath is actually 360 degrees in nature.

So feel like you're expanding that balloon up and out to all the sides on the inhale and the exhale,

It's just contracting and settling.

So feel that for a few rounds on this beautiful body scan.

Notice the arms and the hands,

How they feel maybe in your lap,

Temperature,

Contact points.

Let your arms be maybe 10% heavier in your lap or in your thighs wherever they're resting.

And then finally moving up to the face,

Totally normal to have a little tension around the eyes or jaw in our busy culture.

Just bring some love to that,

Breathe right into it,

Soften around any of that.

Accepting.

And feel the top of the head,

The ears.

And then when you're ready on the next exhale,

This is one of my favorite parts,

Is when you exhale really tune into the whole body from head to toe.

Here we go.

Let's do three rounds,

Just really feeling all the tingling of the body,

All the contact points,

Temperatures.

Excellent work.

And let that go and then just be with the breath.

Coming in and out.

If there's thoughts,

Just let it kind of fade into the background.

You're just so into the present moment that the thoughts become irrelevant.

Here you are in your body with your breath.

Now we'll just jump into rain.

So we'll keep it real simple for today.

Just find one feeling in your body.

One feeling that you might normally label as what,

Like anxiety or stress,

Anger,

Frustration.

But skip the label,

Drop the label,

And just feel the raw feeling.

Maybe it's the tightness in your chest,

Maybe the belly feels constricted.

Maybe your throat chakra feels a little tight.

Just find your spot.

So this is the R.

First,

Recognize what's going on.

Now next is A.

Allow it to be there.

No judgment.

See if you can just let it be there.

In Asia they say,

Invite it to have tea with you.

Or like a good friend knocks at your door and they're upset and you let them in.

And you just allow them to be there.

And then the I's investigate.

This is our theme of curiosity.

So we'll spend a little more time here today.

So go towards your feeling.

Get really curious.

See if you can find its location.

Where is that feeling in the body?

You want to show the feelings that you're not afraid anymore.

All it needs is love and attention.

So you just care so much.

It's like a good friend is suffering and you try to figure out what's wrong.

You love them.

So we're just doing the same for yourself.

See is it vibrating that feeling?

Throbbing maybe?

Does it feel maybe dull?

Maybe is it like a block of wood or hot steel sometimes people say?

It's being really cool with whatever you discover.

Get curious.

Is it expanding?

Is it like moving out?

Is it sharp?

Or is it more diffused?

Very curious about your present moment,

Feelings.

Not thinking about it.

Just being with,

Curious.

What temperature is it?

Is it moving?

Just by being with,

Sometimes it even starts to dissolve a little on its own.

Not because you need it to.

Because it really isn't an enemy.

It just needs your love.

And then finally we move to nurture.

And this is just you getting to love on yourself for a change.

Instead of being so mean to yourself and hard on yourself.

Imagine like a cold night and like a loving grandma gives you a blanket,

A warm blanket.

Or maybe someone baked you cookies once.

It's that kind of love.

Like a warm,

Caring tenderness towards your,

The feeling that you are curious about.

Instead of tightening and pushing away like we usually do,

You're softening around the feeling.

And sometimes it just dissolves.

But either way at this point,

Let's let whatever is remaining of it just go through your bottom down into the earth on the next exhale.

Just releasing any remaining tension down into the earth.

And it's just beautifully transformed there into like flowers and healthy,

Healthy earth.

No problem.

Each exhale just letting go of any remaining tension.

And then just seeing if you can feel what it feels like to be absent of that original unpleasant feeling that maybe you had.

If there's any absence of it.

And on a good note,

Meaning celebrate,

Feel good about any progress you made in this session.

Don't be hard on yourself if you didn't.

Just breathing in love,

Breathing out peace.

Breathing in love,

Breathing out peace.

And then it's good to end on a good note.

And what that means is if you can smile a little bit here at the end,

To bring up any little bit of okayness or joy that you got from your practice.

If you can sit with that and radiate it out to all beings who need your love and care,

Just like you do.

So we care for ourselves and then we can spread it out.

And then we'll just end with three rounds of breath.

And then you'll hear a sound of the bell and just hear it all the way to the end.

You can literally hear it all the way to the end.

Thank you.

Thank you.