All About Worry, Anxiety & Panic

This is a talk on all the bad advice around worry, anxiety, and panic, complemented with a guide of practical ways to end the fight, struggle and resistance, to worry, anxiety, and panic, meaning it can move on much quicker. Sometimes you can choose to calm a storm before it gets going, sometimes you have to let it run whilst staying calm, or at least, detach yourself.

Transcript

Hi folks,

This is Arjun Rishai and this is the 200% Life Podcast.

Welcome.

Good to have you here.

I want to talk about worry,

Panic,

Anxiety,

All those emotions that just overwhelm us,

Consume us.

And there is a lot of bad advice out there about these topics.

There is.

I'm guilty of promoting a lot of that bad advice.

I looked at something I wrote five years ago and on the surface it makes a lot of sense.

It makes a ton of sense in a particular time,

A particular space.

And simply that's only worry if it helps.

Only worry if it helps.

So when you're calm,

When you're clear,

When your life is uncluttered and unpanicky,

Then that's great advice.

Why would you worry unless it helped?

Does it help?

Does worry ever help?

Does panic ever help?

No,

It doesn't.

It doesn't.

That's clear.

It's a very interesting thing though because when you're wrapped up in worry,

Panic,

Anxiety,

You can't out think it.

You can't fight it.

You can't struggle it.

You're just in the middle of it.

And what do you do then?

Me telling you only worry if it helps doesn't help at all,

Does it?

But here's the thing.

Perhaps in moments of clarity you can come to a point where you realise,

Look,

I'm tired of worry,

Anxiety,

Panic.

They consume me and they ruin my life.

I'm ready to be free of these things.

I'm willing to be free of suffering.

And at that point it's an amazing thing where you can to realise that worry does not help.

I used to have before,

Way before I learnt to asand and was teaching,

I used to have a little mantra of my own head when I started to get into worry.

When worry was just a baby I would tell myself,

I go,

Well,

Can I do anything about it?

If it's a no,

Then I have to stop worrying.

Logically,

Worrying isn't going to help.

Can't do anything about it,

Stop worrying.

If I could do something about it,

Then get off my bum and do something about it.

Either way,

Don't worry.

As I said,

Very,

Very useful,

Very,

Very logical,

Rational approach when you're calm and clear.

When worry,

Panic,

Anxiety is a baby,

You can just go,

You know what,

And it works too,

Just to choose.

You know,

Us as Shias,

We say just choose.

Choose to be present and still use the Ascension Attitudes and put all your attention on that.

And then whatever emotion is flowing through,

Stops flowing through.

Stops flowing through.

You know what I mean,

It runs out of juice pretty quick.

As I was saying,

What happens if the monster is no longer a baby?

If you're just swimming in worry and anxiety and stress?

And this is what used to happen to me,

It was a fascinating thing,

Was that most of the anxiety would either happen at two in the morning,

When,

And it would get going,

And what would wake me up was that sick feeling in my stomach.

By the time I became conscious,

I was swimming.

I was drowning in worry,

Drowning in anxiety.

So nothing rational would work.

And what I would do is I'd start fighting.

I'd start to throw the Ascension Attitude in there.

I'd start trying to be present.

I'd start trying to be still.

It was almost like I was denying this emotion,

Denying this feeling.

And at that point,

I could not choose to be calm.

It was far too late.

Far,

Far too late.

So this is a nice method.

Instead of fighting,

You stop.

And stopping is a crucial part of the process,

Is realising that you are suffering,

That something uncomfortable is happening,

What you're doing isn't working,

So stop.

Stop trying to be at peace.

Stop trying to be still and in contact with that silent inner space.

And yet,

Do something different.

And the first step is to,

I see you,

Is simply to acknowledge whatever is there.

I see you.

I see you.

I see you worry.

I see you panic.

I see you fear.

I see you.

Second step,

Invite it in.

Come on in.

Sit down.

I see you.

Come in.

Sit down.

Open the door.

Welcome.

You too are welcome.

So instead of fighting and struggling and trying to be something different,

What you're doing is essentially opening your arms,

Pulling out a chair.

Come sit.

Even you are welcome.

Even you.

And third thing,

What do you need?

What do you need me to know?

I see you.

Come in.

Sit down.

What do you need?

How can I help?

And it stops being an adversary.

It stops being an opponent that you need to fight and vanquish.

It starts being almost like you realise that panic and that worry is that of a little child.

Just scared of what will happen.

What if this happens?

What if that happens?

What did I do wrong?

All those things.

So you stop the fight and start just sitting with it.

Now there's a vast difference between sitting with it,

Being aware of the emotion,

Just resting,

Doing nothing but that.

Just sitting.

Who are you?

What do you need?

What are you about?

There's a vast difference between that and fighting and struggling.

And also getting lost in it.

It's the half step back.

It's taking perspective and going,

Hmm,

This is what works.

Alright?

So I see you.

Come in.

Sit down.

What do you need?

How can I help?

What are you about?

And it just takes the pressure.

It takes the fight out of it all because that's what really hurts is the resistance.

The trying to get another state of being and already the monster is not a baby anymore.

It's a monster and it's killing you.

So stop fighting and all trouble go away.

See we try and choose for peace but that's not ascension.

That's not our path.

Our path is one of acceptance.

And if something like that emotion is so intense it's impossible to choose for peace.

When you fight it you're not choosing for acceptance.

So just stepping back,

Stopping the resistance you choose to accept.

In that acceptance there can be contentment.

Given the experience exactly as it is there can be contentment.

And in that contentment there comes space,

There comes clarity,

There comes peace.

So it's a subtle thing.

You never choose for peace.

You always choose to accept,

To allow.

But in that allowing eventually,

Sometimes,

Comes peace.

But you're not in control of the peace.

You are in control of how much you struggle and fight and get constrained.

If the emotion is particularly intense,

Particularly intense,

And I've heard this technique very,

Very useful for people with PTSD or if you're just sweating with fear,

Is again stop the struggle.

Stop the analysis.

Stop trying to be rational at all and just feel.

Put your awareness completely on your body.

Notice the skin.

Maybe your fingertips.

Rub your fingertips together.

Listen.

Just hear the sounds.

Use your senses.

Be in your body completely.

Become aware of the tension that's come from the struggle.

Relax,

Release.

Take some deep breaths.

Sit again with the emotion.

It will flow through.

A neuroscientist once said that any emotion is only,

Chemically speaking,

Is only in your body for 90 seconds.

If you just let it go,

It comes in,

Floods,

Releases,

Gone.

It's the resistance or the story.

Why am I,

What did I do to deserve this?

Why is this happening to me that keeps it in play?

So it's an interesting thing.

If you realize you're struggling,

Stop.

Come back.

Put your full attention on your body.

Your full,

Complete attention.

As I say,

Rub your fingertips together.

Maybe bring your tongue across your teeth.

Maybe listen.

Maybe feel.

Just be in your body.

Be in your senses.

Take that half step back from the emotions.

And there you are.

Sometimes you can choose to calm the storm before it comes a storm.

You can choose for the ascension attitude.

You choose for the stillness so well,

So precisely,

So profoundly that you're anchored in stillness and silence,

Present,

Wonderful.

The emotion arises and it drops and it's gone.

Sometimes,

As we've been saying,

You're fully in it and that is not the time to try and choose for calm.

You calm yourself and you let the storm go until it's run out of steam and you get back to business.

I don't really have a rule book for you,

But you need to experience this for yourself.

You do.

And when you walk through an experience like this,

It's actually very,

Very good because you're getting excellent at being.

.

.

You're becoming a master of non-resistance.

You're becoming a master of acceptance.

You're becoming a master of calm.

You're realizing when you stop fighting,

You come to a point of realization that you may have a certain emotion,

But you are not it.

A crucial distinction.

You may have panic,

But you are not the panic.

And in that,

The panic goes quicker and quicker.

When the panic comes back,

You see that story,

You see that fight quicker and quicker.

So always,

From that half step back,

You have that clarity that,

Yes,

There is a storm,

There is a raging,

There is an emotion,

But I am not that.

When you're fighting,

You're saying,

I cannot be myself with this emotion.

You see?

I cannot be my true self with this thing going on.

I'm not doing it right.

So in allowance,

What we can talk about,

You get that half step back,

You get that clarity.

So super important to become a master of that.

Super important.

So if you like,

When you see that happening,

When you see the emotion coming,

Welcome it.

Always bring it on.

Good.

This is my chance to master this.

It's an experiential thing,

But do this.

And I promise you,

You're going to get so good at mastering your emotions.

And what I mean by mastering is,

It's not dominating,

It's not anything like that.

It's simply not being affected by them.

You get so good that they'll come and then they'll go so quick.

It's a wonderful way to live life because everything becomes so much easier,

So much smoother,

So much sweeter.

All right?

So I hope this helps.

I hope this has been of benefit to you.

Let me know how I can help.

Drop me an email.

See me on Instagram or Facebook or whatever,

But just ask.

I'd love to help.

All right.

Thanks for listening,

Everyone,

And we'll see you next time.

Reviews

This was really helpful in reminding me that resistance is the culprit when I am feeling emotionally charged. Thank you for a relaxing and enlightening talk.

Wow-amazing! I’ve been overwhelmed with anxiety, panic, and worry for several years. Your talk makes perfect sense to me. Thank you 😊 so much!

I wrote a five star review two years ago, and I still find this talk is my go to for this topic. I love that it is so informative, and gives actual PRACTICAL steps of what to do when faced with anxiety. Thank you

Thank you 🙏 The technique takes practice but feeling confident given your kind & caring approach

Thank you! This reminds me of the RAIN practice, and of 'asking Mara to tea'.

I'm very interested in Ascension, and this morning I was suddenly overcome by sadness. I allowed all the big feels, and it soon evaporated. Like a light shower.
I'll try to remember this practice when a storm comes through.

That was helpful thanks 🙏

Very interesting and calming to listen to. Thank you.

It will take practice but I really value this teaching. Wish me luck!

Absolutely amazing tips!!! I had to stop and take notes. Genius!🙏

That’s the best method I’ve ever heard for addressing difficult emotions, thank you 🙏

Thank you for this talk. What does letting your emotion just be there look like?

Love this insight and find it super helpful. Thank you Namaste 🙏

So simple! So helpful! Incredibly greateful and will be practising this as often as needed - Thank you so much 😊

Wonderfully explained, super helpful this approach🙏🙏 thanks for sharing

Really interesting, thank you. I will be trying out your advice.

Inviting it in to have a seat and asking it what it needs. Incredible. The half step back helps to settle the “story.” Thank you.

Excellent advice, thanks. I will use this next time anxiety and panic begin to arise.

Came across this during what I thought was about to be a panic attack . Havenr had one in a long time . This really is a great session

Thanks so much !

Wow! This helped me more than I can say! Thank you....🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

This is a tremendously helpful talk with different suggestions for dealing with the progressively difficult states from worry to anxiety to panic.