Mettā Meditation
While we often think of meditation as an individual practice, to cultivate awareness, a wise mind doesn’t serve us if we don’t know how to live relationally with ourselves and others. Enter mettā. Thich Nhat Hanh, the renowned zen master, author said in ‘Teachings on Love': ‘[This] meditation is not wishful thinking. It is an authentic practice. Looking deeply, you radiate the energy of mindfulness onto the object of your meditation and illuminate it. True seeing always gives rise to true love
Transcript
So this is a 30-minute practice of loving-kindness,
Where I invite you to follow what is known as a classical order,
Where we start by directing meta or loving-kindness phrases to ourselves first,
And then we turn to other people,
A benefactor,
A neutral person,
Loved one,
And a difficult person,
Before widening to include the whole world,
All beings everywhere around the world.
This is a practice that was recorded live on Zoom a few weeks ago.
Enjoy.
Let's practice.
So if you're not already,
I'm going to invite you to take a very comfortable seat,
Remembering that to practice loving-kindness to ourselves and others,
It's best to be seated in a way that we feel supported,
So don't hesitate to put an extra cushion behind your back.
And hopefully you're nicely settled.
And I am going to invite you to start with making an intention for today's practice.
Perhaps it's an intention of self-compassion and kindness to yourself.
It could be an intention around non-judgment,
Or it could be being fully aware,
Fully focused for the next 20 to 25 minutes as we go over a full practice of loving-kindness.
So taking a moment to feel into your body,
Sitting here.
Perhaps feeling into your feet if they're in contact with the ground,
If you're sat in a chair.
Feeling your sit bones on your seat.
And perhaps you get a sense of support,
Feeling that your body is indeed being supported by the earth.
We will start with self first.
Starting with,
May I be well.
May I be happy.
May I feel peaceful.
May I feel loved.
May I be well.
May I be happy.
May I feel peaceful.
And may I feel loved.
And so I'm going to let you repeat these phrases a few times silently to yourself.
And perhaps if you are on your own,
You can choose to whisper them out loud in your ear.
So whisper them to yourself.
May I be well.
May I be happy.
May I feel peaceful.
May I feel loved.
Perhaps you can see if you can link the phrases with the movements of the breath.
Inhaling with,
May I be happy.
Exhaling with,
May I be well.
Inhaling with,
May I feel peaceful.
Exhaling with,
May I feel loved.
Remembering as well that loving kindness doesn't ask you to act on anything.
All you need to do is to put all of your attention and all of your intention,
The one contained in the phrases.
And to send these sort of well wishes to yourself.
And perhaps you may feel triggered by sending yourself loving kindness.
Perhaps it's going to come easy,
But doing your best to exercise that quality of non-judgment.
And just going back to finding a rhythm with the phrases.
May I be well.
May I be happy.
May I feel peaceful.
And may I feel loved.
And loving kindness phrases are not like,
May I be well.
And these phrases are not like wishing upon a star.
Really what we're doing here is we're wishing ourselves well the same way that we would wish someone a happy new year or a happy birthday.
It's a sentiment of gift giving.
So giving ourselves the gift.
The gift contained in the intention.
May I be well.
May I be happy.
May I feel peaceful.
And may I feel loved.
And whenever your mind wanders off,
Which it will,
Because that's what minds do,
Just gently but firmly recommit,
Come back to the phrases.
And these phrases are powerful.
As psychologist Danielle Goldman says,
The phrases of loving kindness are psychoactive.
Even if you think that nothing's happening,
Deep down you're cultivating the seeds of self-compassion,
Self-kindness.
May I be well.
May I be happy.
May I feel peaceful.
May I feel loved.
And now let's move on to a category that is called the benefactor.
And you could say the benefactor is anyone who has been supporting you,
Perhaps a mentor,
Someone you look up to,
Someone who brings a smile to your face.
So letting your mind settle on a benefactor for today.
And let us direct the same wishes of loving kindness towards this other being.
And you can try to imagine this person as best you can in your mind's eye or get a feel for who they are as you direct the same phrases.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
May you feel loved.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
May you feel loved.
And if your mind wanders off again,
Just noticing without judgment and bring your attention back and focus on the identity,
The name,
Or any sense of this mentor.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
And may you feel loved.
And you can try to see if you can connect the phrases with the movements of the breath.
Perhaps inhaling,
May you be well.
Exhaling,
May you be happy.
Inhaling,
May you feel peaceful.
Exhaling,
May you feel loved and connected.
And next,
We are going to be directing loving kindness towards a friend,
A loved one,
Someone with whom we have an easy relationship.
It could even be a pet,
A dear one.
And so imagining this loved one,
And let's direct the same phrases towards them.
Again trying to imagine them,
Get a sense of their being,
Their presence.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
May you feel loved.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
And may you feel loved.
May you be well.
And now we are going to move to the category of someone difficult.
Now we don't want to be working with anything traumatic.
So just bring to mind someone with whom you've had some mild difficulties with.
It could be in the recent past or it could be from a long time ago.
And once your mind has settled on this person,
We're going to work to direct the same wishes of loving kindness towards them.
Even though it may be that at times you may feel that they don't deserve them,
That's okay.
You don't have to act in any other way towards the person.
All you're doing is cultivating your attention and your intention through the phrases of loving kindness,
Recognizing the universal need that we all have,
The desire to be well,
To be happy,
To live with ease,
To be healthy and loved.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
May you feel loved.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
May you feel loved.
May you be well.
Imagining this person being really well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
And may you feel loved.
Again,
See if you can find a rhythm and to continue internally to be directing the same phrases towards this person.
Conscious of your inhales and exhales and gathering all of your attention,
Committing your attention to directing these wishes of loving kindness.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
And may you feel loved.
And now let's move.
And this time we're going to be directing the same well wishes to someone towards whom we have been perhaps difficult,
Short.
And once we've settled our attention on this person,
Let's practice putting all of our attention on each of the phrases one at a time and remembering the recipient,
Whatever way we can get a sense of who they are.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
And may you feel loved.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
And may you feel loved.
And now I'm going to invite you to come back to yourself.
As I was taught the first time I did a practice of loving kindness,
I'm going to invite you to try to bring a smile on your face.
It doesn't need to be the biggest smile.
But bring a smile on your face and I invite you to gather up more energy,
Reconmit and energize yourself as you're going to send back to yourself a double dose of loving kindness,
Doubling down on the intention and again,
Committing your attention on each of the phrases.
May I be well.
May I be happy.
May I feel peaceful.
And may I feel loved.
Again,
See if you can keep that smile,
However small or big on your face as you repeat,
May I be well.
May I be happy.
May I feel peaceful.
And may I feel loved.
And next I'm going to invite you to think of a group of people.
We could be friends,
Family,
Colleagues.
It could be people in your city or your country.
So bring a group to mind.
And let's commit the same attention and energy in sending them loving kindness.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
May you feel loved.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
And may you feel loved.
And to close the practice,
I am going to invite you to imagine all beings everywhere around the world,
On land,
In the air,
Underwater,
All beings.
And let's send them or give them the same gifts,
This intention of loving kindness.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
And may you feel loved.
Perhaps you may visualize or imagine the world in some way.
Some of you may have some feeling of energy,
Moving from you out into the world.
You don't need to conjure up any feeling,
But some may come as you connect and recognize that all beings everywhere around the world want to be free,
Healthy,
At peace,
And live with ease.
May you be well.
May you be happy.
May you feel peaceful.
And may you feel loved.
I will read you a poem by Hafiz called With That Moon Language.
Admit something.
Everyone you see,
You say to them,
Love me.
Of course,
You do not do this out loud.
Otherwise someone would call the cops.
Although think about this,
This great pull in us to connect.
Why not be or become the one?
Why not become the one who lives with a full moon in each eye that is always saying with that sweet moon language what every other eye in the world is dying to hear?
Before we close,
I'm going to invite you to take a second to reflect on what would happen if you could practice loving kindness and self compassion regularly.
Who would you be?
How would you show up in the world?
And I will close with a single line from the other wonderful mystic poet Rumi.
Love is the bridge between you and everything else.
Thank you so much for coming to practice.
Namaste.
