Seeing Clearly, Holding Kindly - A Self-Compassion Practice

In this practice, we explore the two wings of awareness; seeing all that arises clearly and holding all that arises with compassion. In a soft practice of opening and softening, we gradually open up further to all that is present, and find our way to hold ourselves with a deeper level of benevolence. In this way, we start to build the capacity to sit with our whole selves, being kind towards our experience.

Transcript

For this sitting,

For this practice,

We are going to experiment and play with and really seek to touch and embody what it feels like to practice with both wings of awareness.

The first wing being seeing things clearly,

Seeing things as they are,

As they arise in our experience.

And the second is to hold everything that does emerge and does arise in our experience,

To hold that with benevolence,

With kindness and with compassion.

It's very hard to be able to hold the whole moment,

The wholeness of our human experience without this sense of compassion and kindness.

Because sometimes there are difficult emotions,

Difficult thoughts,

Things that may be confronting.

There are some things that are sometimes difficult to bear,

That arise.

And so it's important that as we do seek to see clearly,

We also seek to hold kindly.

And so for the next ten minutes or so we're going to practice these both.

And just seeing if we can widen our eyes,

Widen our internal gaze,

Our internal drishti,

To become aware of everything and anything that arises.

And at the same time keep our hearts and our chest open to really meet everything that arises with kindness.

And so to begin just finding yourself a nice comfortable seat.

If you're in a chair just let your feet be flat on the floor feeling the sense of groundedness and the sit bones on the chair.

If you're on a cushion just letting your sit bones rest on the cushion,

Your feet on the floor.

And for the next couple of breaths just inhaling to elongate the spine up towards the sky and exhaling to let yourself become a little bit heavier.

And closing down the eyes if you're comfortable to do so.

I'm just going to open with a quote by Kristin Neff as well.

When we're in touch with our common humanity we remember that feelings of inadequacy and disappointment are shared by all.

This is what distinguishes self-compassion from self-pity.

Whereas self-pity says poor little me.

Self-compassion remembers that everyone suffers and it offers comfort because everyone is human.

So let's practice this a little.

Seeing if you can begin by just sitting with a couple of cycles of breath starting to notice the breath wherever it's most noticeable for you.

This might be the space between the upper lip and the nostrils,

The base of the throat or the sensation of the whole body breathing.

Just taking a couple of moments to connect with the breath where it's easiest for you to do so.

And then just taking a moment to scan through the body from the forehead or the crown of the head.

Just let the crown of the head,

Imagine that the crown of the head is soft,

Soft pallid of skin.

And then there could be water trickling down from the crown of the head down the front of the face,

The back of the head,

The side of the head,

All the way down to your toes and as it falls down from the crown of your head to the tip of your toes it's just allowing the muscles,

The tension to soften,

To dissipate,

To dissolve.

Just feeling if there's any tension that can be easily released and just taking a moment to do so.

And then coming back to your breath or wherever you're connected to the breath.

And allowing the breath to be received in the same way that we listen to sound.

Without needing to do the breathing,

Just noticing that the body is breathing.

And as we connect to the breath we take our gaze inward.

When we take the gaze inward certain things become a little bit more obvious.

Sometimes it might be we're feeling at distance with ourselves.

We become more aware of any tension or unmet needs that are welling inside us.

Sometimes we feel at distance to others.

We become aware of a sense of aloneness or separation that we feel.

Or many other things become obvious or at least more clear to us when we take a moment to quieten down and step back from the external world for a moment.

Just starting to notice what it is that's here for you.

Using the breath as an anchor to keep your awareness stable,

Your heart open from the breath to start to become aware of all of the rising and falling waves around the breath.

Noticing how they come and also how they pass.

And noticing how just after a couple of moments you may have got caught in a thought or emotion or a wave.

Sometimes you can think of it as a big,

A large wave pulling you aside from the breath.

So see if you can stay with the breath.

Notice the waves coming and going in their own time.

And seeing if you can still hold this smiling chest,

The smiling eyes,

This openness across the heart to bear witness to all that arises around the breath.

And wherever you are just coming back to the breath knowing that at any point you can choose to re-center,

To re-ground and to reset.

Coming back to the body,

Opening up across the face,

The shoulders,

The hips.

Taking a couple of breaths to elongate the spine again and resettle into a strong and also gentle posture.

And then reconnecting with the breath.

Taking a couple of moments to come back before again noticing the waves around the breath.

Trying to hold everything that arises in the spirit of compassion.

And if you notice a large wave come by that pulls you off to the side,

You might not come back to the breath just yet,

But you might turn to face the wave and greet it as if with a bow with the same loving awareness.

Just to be curious about the wave.

What is that wave alluding to?

Is there something within you seeking attention,

Acknowledgement,

Voice?

And then when the strength of that wave subsides and it naturally comes to a resolution and And just for a couple more moments,

Seeing if you can stick with the breath.

Keeping your gaze and your internal attention wide open to allow for everything that's here in this moment.

And keeping your chest open,

Your heart wide to be able to hold all that is here with kindness.

And just beginning to deepen the breath and coming back to your body,

Maybe wriggling your toes and your fingers.

And we'll close with another quote by Kristin Neff.

You can't always have high self-esteem and your life will continue to be flawed and imperfect,

But self-compassion will always be there waiting for you a safe haven.

So may you be able to leave your practice,

Being able to hold anything that shows up for you with a sense of compassion,

Acceptance,

Lightness and kindness.

Reviews

Just right for this morning. A gentle yet direct way to start my day. 🙏🏻💞

Perfect length and very different by focusing only on practicing a single, practical idea.

Thank you for this practice! Being kind towards myself is a good and great reminder while helping others.

Al, this was my first meditation with you and I’m so grateful for your kind and gentle leadership.

Can you tell me what was the marvelous music (chimes? Bells?) that opened the piece?

Many thanks and blessings,

Claudia

Compassion acceptance kindness lightness. Thank you.

Very nice 🌷thank you 🙏

I love Jeremy’s voice, focus, humility, perspective. He is my FAVORITE teacher on Insight Timer! I feel so blessed to have found him at this most tumultuous time in my life. Short, digestible, practical, no ego. A rare gem!

I love this meditation. thank you so much.

Welcome everything, push away nothing. Thank you for the intention to do this with compassion 🙏

Compassion, lightness, and kindness are powerful words to help Dissolve the discomfort of this life.

I enjoyed the practice including its final thoughts to meet anything that comes your way with compassion, lightness, and kindness. Good narration and pleasant background tones and sounds.

Thanks for bringing me back to center

Wonderful! As are all your compassion and kindness meditations. Thank you.

Beautiful meditation

Simple to understand, a very nice practice

The practice was too fast, too challenging, at times contradictory. I’m going to keep trying, because I oddly am fascinated by him. He is extraordinarily intelligent.

Good words to sink deeply into the heart with. Soothing voice too.

Kind and gentle, thank you ♡

That was a wonderful reminder. This will be on repeat and used often. Thank you.

Excellent. Calm voice, nice soft background sounds. Led me thru waves to a sense of more peace.