We've all failed at some point,
And that's completely normal.
Honestly,
If you haven't failed,
You're either lying or you haven't really put yourself out there or taken many risks yet.
See,
Failure is part of life.
It's part of growing.
It's necessary.
The problem is that most people take failure the wrong way.
They make it personal.
They think it says something about who they are as a person.
So when something doesn't work out,
They start telling themselves that it happened because of their limitations,
Their shortcomings.
And over time,
That starts to chip away at their confidence.
Then something interesting happens.
You still set goals.
You still want things,
But you don't want to feel that sting of failure again.
Am I right?
So instead of fully committing,
You start pulling back a little.
You don't finish certain things.
You avoid taking risks.
You delay tasks,
Whether that's at work or home,
Or even things you said you do for the people that you care about.
On the surface,
It can feel like you're failing less.
But underneath,
Something else is happening.
Your relationship with yourself starts to suffer.
You begin to trust yourself less.
You hesitate more.
You second guess your actions.
And when self-trust drops,
Confidence usually follows.
From there,
Action slows down,
Risks get smaller,
Procrastination creeps in,
And eventually that can turn into complacency.
At that point,
Doing anything challenging starts to feel overwhelming.
When you're stuck,
When you're stuck there,
It's so hard to move forward.
You feel stagnant and eventually you lose momentum.
And the thing is,
Most people blame this on failure,
But failure isn't actually what broke your self-trust.
What really broke it was breaking promises to yourself.
Just think about it.
If you had a friend who constantly said they'd do something and never followed through,
You'd slowly stop trusting them,
Right?
Not because of one big moment,
But because of all the lots of small ones,
Right?
It works the same way with yourself.
Every time you promise you'll do something and you don't do it,
Trust erodes a little bit by little over time.
So the first step in rebuilding self-trust is honesty.
Just plain honesty without judgment.
You look at your day and your day-to-day life,
And you notice where you're not keeping your word to yourself.
Where you say you'll do something and then quietly let it slide.
That awareness,
That awareness matters.
The second step is to stop making big promises.
If you're trying to rebuild trust,
Going all in usually backfires.
Momentum doesn't come from intensity.
It comes from consistency.
So instead of setting huge goals,
You scale things way down.
Start by creating a short list,
Like three to five simple tasks.
Honestly,
Some of them might feel a little silly at first,
And that's fine.
The point isn't achievement.
The point is to follow through.
You commit to that list and you do it for about a week or two.
And during that time,
You don't obsess over whether you're progressing or improving or winning at life.
You're just practicing to keep your word.
That's all you're doing.
Some days you'll miss a task.
That's okay.
You don't have to beat yourself up for it.
You don't have to overanalyze it.
You just come back to what you're committed to.
The tasks,
They can be small.
They can be boring.
It doesn't matter.
What matters is what you do when no one else is watching.
These are personal commitments.
They're not for anyone else.
It could be something so small like making yourself breakfast,
Tidying your desk,
Watering your plants or washing your car,
Which reminds me now I have to wash my car.
But small things done with intention,
That is how trust in yourself rebuilds.
It's also important to separate your identity from the outcome.
Failing at something doesn't mean you are a failure.
It means you're human because everyone fails.
Even the word failure is a bit dramatic if you ask me.
I like to reframe it.
Let's think of it as an outcome that you didn't want.
That's a better way to look at it,
Right?
That's it.
It's also okay to feel disappointed when things don't work out.
You see,
Disappointment is all part of the process.
You don't have to avoid it.
In fact,
I would even go further and say you can use disappointment as fuel.
Another helpful shift is to look at what happened without getting wrapped up in emotion.
I tend to get caught up in emotion and not really understand things,
But try to view things from a distance.
Ask yourself what worked,
What didn't,
And what you would do differently next time.
You might fail again and that's okay.
That's fine.
Each attempt gives you feedback.
Each attempt helps you understand the process better.
And you adjust the process.
You don't let the process define your worth.
Before confidence can grow,
Consistency has to come first.
Confidence comes from evidence.
Evidence comes from keeping small promises to yourself.
And finally,
Speak kindly to yourself.
Talk to yourself the way a calm,
Grounded mentor would speak to you.
Firm,
Fair,
And supportive.
Keep showing up.
Keep persisting.
Self-trust is rebuilt by keeping your word to yourself again and again.
Hope this resonates and let me know if it does.
Let me know what you think in the comments and be sure to subscribe for more content that will hopefully take your life to the next level.
Either way,
Much love and thank you so much for your time.
