Welcome,
I am Ale Garnica.
Thank you for being here.
We have learned to be very hard on ourselves when making a mistake.
We've seen this over and over when growing up.
We are punished when doing things quote-unquote wrong.
And the way this punishment happens gives us a message that we are left out.
Whether they don't let us go to recess or they put us on time out,
That makes us stand out in a not very positive way.
It makes us feel different,
Feel like we don't fit in.
And that is one of the most feared situations a human can have.
We want to fit in.
We want to make sure that we are part of a group or a tribe,
Because for our instinctive brain,
Being part of a tribe increases our chances to survive.
And being left out is emotionally painful.
Therefore,
We don't want that to be repeated.
So what we do is that we unconsciously replicate the punishment we received
from other people through self-criticism.
All of us have an internal critic.
Some are louder than others.
And I have good and bad news for you.
The bad ones are that the self-critic will be with you forever,
Because it has good intentions.
It's there to protect you from being left out,
From feeling pain,
And for you to survive.
Now,
The good news is that you can learn to become friends with the self-critic
and lower down its voice through self-compassion.
Self-compassion is a term I heard of for the first time six years ago
when I read Kristen Neff's book named Self-Compassion.
And I highly recommend it if you haven't read it.
And I had heard of and experienced compassion towards others,
But I had never thought I could use this for myself.
But when I read this book and I practiced self-compassion,
My life changed.
And the intention is that with this meditation,
Your life changes too.
You can practice this meditation while sitting down,
While laying down,
Or you can also practice it while driving or taking a walk.
If you are sitting or laying down,
I invite you to close your eyes
and just feel your body relax.
Pay attention to the natural movement of your chest and your tummy
when you breathe in and when you breathe out.
Now,
I invite you to move your attention to your internal silence.
This calm and quiet space where you can be yourself.
Everything is okay.
Where you are safe.
This is your home.
Now we're gonna take three deep breaths.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
And one more.
Breathe in.
Hold.
And breathe out.
Now,
I invite you to think about a situation where you made a mistake.
Whether you failed while trying something,
Or you said or did something that didn't go
the way you expected,
And you felt bad about it.
Pay attention to any emotion that becomes present when evoking this situation.
Remembering is living again.
Our brain doesn't differentiate between past and present.
Therefore,
The emotions we feel can be very similar to what we felt when the situation happened.
With this situation in mind,
I invite you to mentally repeat.
I made a mistake.
And that's okay.
I am human.
I am not perfect.
I am allowed to make mistakes.
I am allowed to make mistakes.
Mistakes are proof of how brave I am.
Because they are the result of taking a risk.
Of trying something for the first time.
Of expressing my emotions.
Of expressing my feelings.
Mistakes are needed to move forward when I am willing to learn from them.
And I know that the more loving and compassionate I am with myself,
The easier it will be to learn from my mistakes.
While it can be hard and painful to face the results from a mistake,
I forgive myself.
I did the best I could with the information I had in that moment.
Those mistakes don't define me.
I am loving.
I am lovable.
Just because I exist.
I decide to let go of self-criticism.
And instead I open the door to forgiveness.
Acceptance.
Love.
And compassion.
That's what will make me a more resilient person.
And when I am resilient,
I'm willing to try again.
And that's freedom.
Today I decide to accept myself just the way I am.
With ups and downs.
With lights and shadows.
That's what makes me a beautiful,
Unique human being.
This is who I am.
This is who I embrace.
This is who I love.
This is my truth today.
Now let's close the practice with three deep breaths.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
And one more.
Breathe in.
Hold.
And breathe out.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
Breathe out.
When you're ready,
Add your own time.
Open your eyes.
Thank you for meditating with me today.
