Hello,
And welcome to your Mindful Self-Compassion Strategy.
Let's first talk a little bit about why self-compassion is so important somatically.
Most of us can relate to having an inner critic,
A voice that's not very nice to us,
Is judgmental,
Gives us a really hard time.
This is a voice that tends to be in our head,
Can be very loud,
And we can think oftentimes that it is our own voice.
But it's just an inner critic,
A part of us,
Most of the time,
Probably developed in childhood,
Usually from a critical caretaker,
Relative,
Even teachers,
Coaches.
Or sometimes,
In the world we live in,
It just comes from all of the many outside voices that we read and listen to,
Whether we want to or not,
Sometimes if the algorithm delivers it to us.
Mindful self-compassion is about tuning in to your heart,
To your emotions,
To find yourself in your body,
Listening to your inner voice,
Remembering that in moments of difficulty,
When we want to disconnect from our bodies or how we're feeling,
It's so important to give ourselves love and compassion in a very mindful way,
Rather than numbing out,
Or tuning out,
Or judging ourselves,
Being hard on ourselves,
Being downright mean to ourselves sometimes.
So this is a tool for you to be able to give yourself self-compassion when you need it most.
And it's a tool you can use every day,
Over and over,
Multiple times,
If you need to.
I'll invite you right now to bring up something in your life that's stressful,
That you're anxious,
Or worried,
Or sad about.
Just sit for a moment with that,
Staying connected to your emotions,
Where you feel discomfort,
Distress,
Pain.
If you've done some somatic work,
You might notice those areas in the body,
They might be very familiar,
Especially when it comes to this particular stressful,
Or anxious,
Or sad situation.
What I'd like you to say first,
After me,
And you can say it out loud,
You can say it quietly,
Or you can say it kind of inside.
This is a moment of difficulty.
We're bringing awareness to the fact that difficulty is present.
It is what it is.
Now I'll invite you to find language that speaks to your particular difficulty,
To make it personal to you,
And whatever you're going through.
For example,
In your colloquial language,
You might say something like,
This is really freaking hard right now.
Or,
Man,
I'm really struggling with fill in the blank.
Go ahead and give it a try in your own voice,
Your own words,
Your own experience.
We're turning towards our difficulty,
Acknowledging it,
And naming it.
Moving on to step two.
You're going to repeat after me again,
In whichever way is comfortable for you.
Difficulty is a part of life.
Our difficulties remind us of our common humanities.
They're what make us human.
I would invite you to find language that speaks to your own humanness.
You might say something like,
It's not weird to feel like this.
Or many people are going through similar situations and emotions.
You might even be able to already in your life or in your past identify people who've gone through similar things as the thing that you're having difficulty with.
Go ahead and find a way to speak to your humanness in this difficulty.
It's sometimes good when we're experiencing difficulty to remember that nothing is new.
And in the history of humanity,
People have gone through so many of the same things,
The same challenges,
The same patterns.
And they've come out and they've been okay.
And they've figured things out.
And so that means that you,
As a human,
Can do the same thing.
But also,
You know that difficulty is not something that we can ever avoid.
It is part of the human experience.
So we don't need to necessarily judge it or numb it or try to push it away.
Only causes more suffering.
We have to bring compassion to ourselves as a human.
Let's move on to the last phrase of our self-compassion strategy.
This time,
If it feels comfortable to you,
I invite you to place your hands on your heart,
Or any other part of the body that needs soothing or comforting,
Depending on what difficulty you're having.
You might have somewhere specific.
And repeating after me again,
May I be kind to myself.
And allowing that phrase to echo.
Imagining streams of care flowing through your fingers,
Soothing the tender areas of your body where your hands are resting.
And repeat after me again,
May I be kind to myself in this moment.
And again,
Find the language that supports kindness to yourself.
If this feels a bit unfamiliar,
Or a little too woo-woo spiritual in a way that you have not been comfortable with,
You might just say,
I'm going to be OK.
I'm taking care of myself.
Now here's the big one.
I'll repeat it twice to end our mindful self-compassion strategy.
And you can repeat it after me.
May I grow from a place of love,
Acceptance and kindness to myself.
So 3 things.
May I grow from a place of love,
Acceptance and kindness to myself.
If we think about ourselves like we think about a plant,
Don't worry,
We're just using it as a metaphor.
I know some of us aren't green thumbs.
But if we're going to grow a plant,
We have to take care of it.
It doesn't grow a plant to cut it down,
To not give it water,
To isolate it in a dark corner without sunlight,
Or even to speak mean things to it.
I think there is some science on this about speaking to and singing to plants and different things and what positivity and love and compassion did compared to more negative things.
We as humans are even more sensitive to those things.
So when you're starting to feel like you're cutting yourself down,
Or isolating yourself or judging yourself,
Or there's a really mean voice happening in your head,
Remember that's not you.
Return to the body.
And try to sit and do this mindful self-compassion strategy to bring love and care and understanding and acceptance to whatever stressful thing you're going through.
And the more you do it,
The more we can develop that pathway of self-compassion,
So that we're more likely to take it instead of taking that quicker route to criticism,
Or meanness,
Or anger,
Or self-sabotage,
Or shutting ourself down.
Like anything,
Mindful self-compassion is a practice.
And I've loved practicing with you today.
And I hope to practice again with you soon.
