The Havening Technique.
A simple practice for alleviating in the moment stress,
Anxiety,
Or any unpleasant emotion.
Hi there friend.
My name is Anthony and I'm going to guide you through this short exercise anytime you're experiencing stress and need to bring a sense of calm and balance back to your body.
So take a deep breath in and let it out in any way that feels gentle and soothing.
If you are sitting down,
Feel your feet touching the floor.
Or if you're lying down,
Feel your body against the surface beneath you and close your eyes if that feels safe.
Call to mind something in your life right now that is causing you a great deal of discomfort and unpleasantness.
It could be a memory from the past that haunts you,
It could be something in one of your relationships,
Or perhaps something in your work that triggers feelings of anxiety or anger.
It can be any situation that overwhelms you with heavy emotion,
That grips you and makes you feel stuck.
Literally anything that is blocking your well-being or causing you to be unhappy at times.
Recall a specific time or incident when you experienced this issue and these unpleasant feelings were triggered.
This could be something that just happened earlier today,
Or maybe a few minutes ago,
Or this can be an ongoing issue in your life.
Now,
As unpleasant as this might be,
Try to relive the uncomfortable feelings and try to activate the painful emotions right now.
Try to get the anxiety,
The hurt,
The anger,
Any of those unpleasant feelings really high so you can feel them.
The aim here is to get a bit uncomfortable from revisiting this memory,
From re-experiencing it.
Now,
Immediately clear your mind,
Completely clear your mind,
And start rubbing the sides of your arms gently.
Across your arms,
You can feel the pain,
You can feel the discomfort,
You can feel the anxiety,
The hurt,
The anger,
Any of those unpleasant feelings really high across your arms,
Across your chest,
Putting your right hand beneath your left shoulder and your left hand beneath your right shoulder,
And gently stroke the sides of your arms up and down in a continuous motion.
Not too hard,
But in a rhythm and speed however feels best for you.
Think of it like you are comforting yourself.
And as you keep rubbing your arms,
Start to imagine that all of this anxiety and unpleasantness is flowing out of your body,
Dripping out of you like toxic liquid onto the floor.
See all this negative energy emptying out of your body as you keep stroking your arms.
As you keep applying this soothing touch,
Imagine now you are walking through the most beautiful,
Peaceful place you have ever seen.
It could be a place in nature,
A place you've visited,
It could be anywhere in the world,
Real or imagined.
Bring to mind these beautiful,
It could be anywhere in the world,
Real or imagined.
Bring to mind these gorgeous surroundings.
Visualize in your mind everything that you would experience and notice.
Pay attention to how you feel being here.
And if it feels good,
At any time,
You can drop in a simple mantra or affirmation by gently reciting a calming phrase to yourself.
I am calm and relaxed.
I am calm and relaxed.
I am calm and relaxed.
Hopeful and peaceful in a state of love.
Hopeful and peaceful in a state of love.
I am safe and at home.
I am safe and at home.
I am safe and at home.
Pain-free.
Pain-free.
I am pain-free.
You don't have to say all of these.
Use whatever words feel natural to you.
Repeat them softly and lovingly,
Letting them nourish you as you stroke your arms.
Now,
While still stroking your arms,
You can let go of your mantra.
And as you continue to see yourself walking through this beautiful,
Peaceful place,
On each footstep you take,
Start counting down with me from 10 to 1,
Either out loud or silently in your mind.
10,
9,
8,
7,
6,
5,
4,
3,
2,
1.
1.
Keep stroking the sides of your arms.
Now start moving your eyes laterally from left to right.
If your eyes were closed,
You can open them to do this.
Moving your eyes laterally to the left.
Moving your eyes laterally to the right.
Eyes to the left.
Eyes to the right.
You can take this at your own pace for just a few seconds.
Eyes laterally to the left.
And eyes laterally to the right.
If this feels uncomfortable at any time,
You don't have to force it.
You can gently let go of the eye movements,
And simply keep caressing your arms.
Eyes to the left.
And eyes to the right.
Eyes laterally to the left.
And eyes laterally to the right.
Wonderful.
You are doing amazing.
Just a few more seconds of this.
So now we're going to do another round of everything we just did one more time.
So you can let go of the eye movements for now if you were doing them.
You can close your eyes again if you like.
And while still stroking the sides of your arms,
Reconnect with that beautiful,
Peaceful place.
And imagine you are gracefully walking through it,
One step at a time.
Take in all the sights and sounds again,
And notice how wonderful it makes you feel to be in this place.
And again,
If you feel compelled to do so,
You might whisper a calming phrase to yourself.
I am calm and relaxed.
I am calm and relaxed.
Hopeful and peaceful in a state of love.
Hopeful and peaceful in a state of love.
I am safe and at home.
I am safe and at home.
Pain-free.
Pain-free.
I am pain-free.
Whatever phrase feels natural and soothing to you,
Allow it to guide you to peace and safety.
Keep stroking your arms,
And on each step you take now,
Walking through this beautiful,
Glorious place,
Count down with me from 10 to 1.
From 10 to 1.
10.
9.
8.
7.
6.
5.
4.
3.
2.
1.
And again,
Eyes open,
And start moving them laterally from left to right.
Eyes to the left.
Eyes to the right.
Eyes to the left.
Eyes to the right.
Again,
You can do this if it feels comfortable for you,
And take it at your own pace.
No need to force it.
Keep rubbing those arms either way.
Eyes to the left,
And eyes to the right.
A few more times here,
Moving your eyes.
Now you can let go of the eye movements,
Just keep going with the gentle stroking of your arms.
I want you to try to put your full awareness on the sensations of your hands caressing your arms,
And really pay attention to how it feels.
You can even slow down the momentum to really feel the gentleness.
It's almost like you are rocking and comforting a baby.
Except you're that baby,
And you deserve to be loved,
Cared for,
And gently rocked back to safety.
So,
As you stroke those arms,
Love yourself like you would love a baby.
You can release the rubbing of your arms now,
Open your eyes,
And gently rub the palms of your hands together for a few seconds.
Take a deep breath in,
Let it out,
And just let it all go and relax.
Now just gauge how you feel.
If you still feel overwhelmed by those unpleasant emotions,
You can simply repeat this process until you start to feel better.
Repeat the steps as much and as often as you need to restore a sense of peace and balance back in your mind and body.
Thanks for listening.
Take care of yourself.
Have a great day.
