Mindfulness Meditation Intro For Parents - 7. RAIN Practice

In this guided meditation, I introduce you to the practice of RAIN (Recognise, Allow, Investigate and Nurture), a technique used to support ourselves in challenging situations. I have learned this technique from Tara Brach, and she describes it in more details in Radical Acceptance, her book. This meditation is suited for beginner meditator, but you might want to start with a situation that doesn't feel too challenging at first.

Transcript

Let's practice the RAIN meditation today.

Start by finding a place where you feel comfortable.

You can close or half close your eyes.

Sit or be positioned in the way that is alert yet relaxed.

And bring your attention inward.

Take three long slow deep breaths in and out.

Each breath out feeling your body relax.

How does your breath feel today?

Is it shallow?

Is it deep?

Is it fast or is it slow?

How does your body feel?

From your head to your toes.

Is there some tension?

Is it relaxed?

How is your mind?

What is keeping it occupied?

Or is it really to just feel empty?

How is your emotional landscape?

Is it pleasant or unpleasant?

For a few minutes let's bring your attention to your preferred focus point.

It might be the breath.

It might be your body.

Bring your attention there.

And if your attention wavers bring it back gently.

Now I'm going to introduce to you the practice of RAIN.

This is an acronym that stands for Recognize,

Allow,

Investigate and Nurture.

It's a technique that has been used by Tara Brack to deal with difficult situation.

I learned it from her and I'm going to guide you through the steps.

To start I'm going to ask you to bring your attention to your preferred focus point.

Focus your attention on a recent challenging situation.

Let's start with something that isn't very strong or traumatic.

You want to choose something challenging that you can handle to revisit.

As you'll get more and more used to that practice you will pick up more challenging situation in the future.

So picture the situation in your mind.

The sounds or the words that you heard.

The body sensations.

The emotion that you felt.

When you have a clear impression of it let's start with the first step.

So off or recognize what is happening.

Is it a voice in your head or a thought?

Is it a feeling of fear,

Anger,

Shame or anxiety?

Is it twisting a heavy weight,

A burning sensation in your body?

Just note what is there.

As we did in previous meditation you can even name it.

Now let's move into allowing the experience.

It is there,

You've recognized it.

You can offer a few words to confirm that you're allowing it to be.

Not that you're condoning the experience,

Whether what they did or what you did.

It's just it's happened.

So yes,

It's okay.

Now it's like that or of course.

If words don't resonate with you,

You can also offer some care,

Some love.

Like you would do for a dear friend.

They told you something that happened or something bad they did.

And you're giving them a cuddle.

It doesn't mean that you're telling them they can continue to do so.

It's just yeah darling it happened.

If other thoughts or feeling arise like judgment for example,

I shouldn't feel angry or I'm a bad person.

Just repeat the steps.

You'll recognize the judgment,

The shame,

And you allow.

Okay.

Now deepen your attention to investigate your present experience.

You're doing the investigating step there.

You're calling on your natural curiosity and using a more focused attention you're asking What does this part of me need?

What am I believing to be true?

How am I experiencing this in my body?

Often for a situation outside it can be this shouldn't happen.

Oh,

I shouldn't have done that.

Try and stay away from the stories and the intellectual explanation that your mind might bring and try to focus on your body.

Really.

Where is that emerging?

Whatever comes up,

Bring a kind non-judgmental attention to it.

Finally find what nurturing is needed to take care of this suffering part in yourself.

Does it need a message of reassurance?

Of forgiveness?

Of love?

If it does,

What message resonates with it?

I am here.

I love you.

I'm sorry.

I care.

Or does it need a physical touch like your hands on your tummy?

I'm sorry.

I care.

I love you.

I'm sorry.

I care.

I love you.

Does it need a physical touch like your hands on your tummy?

Your heart?

Your throat?

Or your cheek?

Sometimes it is difficult to bring that to yourself.

So you might get some help by visualizing someone dear.

A pet?

A comforting place?

Or memory?

Or even a spiritual being?

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Now come back to your focus point.

Settle into yourself again.

Might it be your breath?

A focus point on your body?

Your hands or your feet?

Or your seat?

Continue focusing on that while you're listening to me.

The last point of that practice is called after the rain.

I like to visualize it like when it's a very dry summer day and then lots of clouds come and there is a downpour and when the cloud is gone after the rain you go outside and you can smell the earth.

You can smell this kind of earth feeling hydrated.

It's like it's almost exhaling with relief to have got some rain.

What you're doing after the rain is you're experiencing this feeling of relief.

How does your body,

Your mind and your heart feel now?

And open progressively to the environment around you.

Feel like you can integrate this new state that you are in with your life.

Open your eyes gently with a soft gaze.

Don't focus on anything.

Just let the light in.

Let the sun shine Let the sounds around you come to your attention and take a few deep and slow breaths like we did at the start.

Thank you for your practice.