SOS Tool For Anxiety

Hello friend,
look no further. Apart from sharing your anxiety with a close friend, this tool will be the best practice to calm yourself and get back to a state of safety. This practice combines dealing with cognitive, emotional, and physical stress, and it will allow your thoughts, emotions, and body to calm down to a state of relaxation and calm.

Transcript

Hello and welcome to this calming anxiety exercise.

Are you struggling to get a handle on your racing mind?

You're not alone.

I know what that is like and I know it's really hard and it can feel very lonely.

But there are tools to help you out.

This practice combines cognitive and emotional relaxation with physical relaxation using journaling and breath work to help you calm down.

Your physical and emotional world are strongly intertwined.

Fast breathing can trigger anxiety and vice versa.

Quite often,

Anxiety is linked to shallow and fast breathing,

Which can be triggered by oxygen and carbon dioxide imbalances in the blood.

Particularly for women,

When hormones change right before your period,

Your body will get more sensitive to carbon dioxide and as a result,

You will breathe faster and feel more anxious.

You can learn more about this in my course on the Science and Practice of Breathing.

But for now,

Let's focus on calming you down.

Slow breathing calms the nervous system and helps your body to relax.

Scientific studies have shown it significantly improves your ability to relax and fall asleep.

But physical relaxation doesn't help if your mind keeps coming back to thoughts that are upsetting you,

And if your emotional state isn't addressed first.

Please know that your body knows how to relax.

Stressors in your environment and in your mind have likely disrupted its natural abilities.

But this exercise will help you to come back to what your body already knows.

For this practice,

You will need paper or a journal and a pen.

If you happen to be in bed and are struggling to sleep right now,

Get out of bed.

Find yourself a seat and some writing.

Let's start.

Notice if there are any negative thoughts that are repeating themselves in your head.

Negative thoughts are words,

Sentences,

Images or sounds that are in your mind,

Feel upsetting to you and keep coming back.

Let's call these thoughts your worries.

If we don't write down our worries in a journal or on a piece of paper,

Your mind will keep bringing them up because it thinks that these are potential threats that need to be addressed.

By paying attention and addressing them,

You will allow your mind to calm down.

So take a moment to write down all your worries and all your to-do's in order to potentially solve those worries in the future.

Promise yourself to get back to these tomorrow.

You can press pause on this recording and continue when you are ready.

Next,

Notice if you feel any emotions like anger or fear or anxiety about any particular upcoming event or past event.

Emotions are distinctly labeled feelings that connect to a context or a target.

We are usually angry at someone or we are frustrated because of a certain situation.

Perhaps you feel anxious about an upcoming work project,

Or anxious that you might not fall asleep,

Or angry with your neighbor for keeping you up.

If this is the case,

Name the emotion that you feel and write down where you feel it in your body.

Again,

Emotions are signs that your body isn't feeling safe and something needs to be addressed.

We need to address them in order to release them and so writing them down so you can get back to them when you are more clear-headed will help your body to know it's safe to calm down now because the important feelings have been heard.

So write down all your emotions,

Write down where you notice them,

And press pause and continue when you are ready.

Next,

I'd like you to write down three things you are grateful for in your life.

We are biologically wired to be more attentive to negative events and potential threats because this once served our survival.

This effect is called the negativity bias.

Forty thousand years ago,

It was more important to spot a predator than to notice the food you had already stored.

Miss the predator and you're dead.

Forget about the food and it will still be there tomorrow.

Therefore loads of your suffering is self-created.

That doesn't mean it's your fault.

It's not.

But it does mean that you can do something about it with your own mind.

Research shows that if we become better at noticing positive things,

We automatically feel happier,

Less anxious,

More relaxed,

And more safe.

So take a moment to think about any positive things that have happened today,

Or people or animals or things you feel grateful for having in your life on a continuous basis.

Write those down in your journal and press pause if you need some time.

Alright,

Now that we have addressed your cognitive and emotional stress and reframed your mindset,

It is time to allow your physical stress to dissolve as well.

Next to cognitive and emotional stressors,

We have physical stresses.

And the best way to address those is by slowing down your breathing.

This practice is best done lying down comfortably on a couch or in a bed.

You may want to place a pillow under your head and knees for support.

Allow yourself to settle in.

Feel the support beneath you.

Allow your body to drop into that support.

And just anything you need in order to truly let go.

Soften the way you engage with this moment.

And when you're ready,

Take a deep breath in through the nose all the way up.

Hold your breath for 3,

2,

1.

Open the mouth and sigh out.

You can do this with first lips if you like.

Take your time on exhale.

And perhaps you can cut your inhale into two pieces.

Inhale filling up.

Inhale a little more.

Hold it.

And exhale as if you were to yawn.

Inhale through the nose.

Hold it.

Open the mouth and sigh out.

Keep repeating that and let this breathing pattern transition into more and more of a yawn.

Perhaps you notice you start inhaling through the mouth.

Just allow your body to naturally do what it does.

No need to push,

You can let it happen.

Your body knows how to relax,

You can trust your body.

Slow deep breaths,

Long relieving sighs.

Perhaps you would like to add a stretch to that.

Stretch out your arms overhead or to the sides,

Your legs away from you.

On every inhale,

Stretch it out.

On every exhale,

Release.

Stretch it out.

Release.

Close your eyes and imagine that you are a little outside your body,

Looking down on yourself as you are laying down.

And every time you inhale,

You see your body lift as if you float,

Becoming weightless at the top of your breath and sinking deeper down through the surface beneath you.

When you breathe out,

Inhale,

Notice a lift,

Exhale,

Let it go.

Lift and let go.

Keep that going at your own pace.

Allow your body to transition at its own pace.

Your body knows how to relax.

Let it happen.

Let it flow.

There is nothing you need to do.

Trust your body.

Let it go.

Thank you for sharing this practice today.

Thank yourself for showing up here.

You're doing a great job.

And have a lovely rest of your day.

Reviews

Thus meditation really helps to calm down and feel more relaxed and at ease. Tx Inge

Dear Inge,
I have come to really love your meditations. The confluence of meditation, neuroscience and human development in your work delights me intellectually and is key to healthfully integrating my thinking, emotions and physical being. I’m very grateful.
Namasté.
Dan

Wonderful. I will certainly come back to this . Very helpful to recognize and separate stressful thoughts, emotions and where these are felt in the body. The relaxation practice at the end was heavenly. Thank you so much for this practice.