Art As Pure Unadulterated Joy

I take the listener on a journey of my own experience with art from childhood through to the present day. I talk about the importance art has played in helping me to heal Cancer twice and how it helped me to find a new language to describe living with chronic pain. Art is about the simplicity of expression through childlike wonder.

Leave the self-judgement and come on a journey with me.

Transcript

Hi,

This is Charlene.

I'm a transformational coach,

Parent of three wonderful teens and artist now.

And that's actually what I want to talk about,

Is that ambivalence of calling myself an artist and the snobbery surrounding art that leads people to decide not to make anything.

And myself,

The first thing I remember ever doing was making art,

Whether that was picking up a pencil and drawing,

Through to painting collage.

I remember making those models in school with all of the,

What would now be recycling,

But at the time it was junk modelling.

And the joy that that brought me,

And the art has been infused into every single aspect of my life,

Until I graduated from university,

From doing a fine art degree.

In fact,

I think that's where it all went wrong,

Was actually on that degree.

I remember in the run-up to that,

I was doing a seasonal part-time job,

And I met this chap who mentored me effectively.

He saw that I had this passion for art,

And he himself was an artist,

And so we'd go and we'd draw together,

And he'd teach me new techniques,

And he just basically gave me the confidence to pursue my art.

Because I remember when I was at school,

I wasn't one of the people who could draw photo-realistically.

My drawing has always been quite sketchy and free,

And I remember looking at those people who could draw something like it was a photograph,

And just envied them so much,

Because I couldn't do that.

And that's the problem,

Is when we start comparing ourselves to others,

Because we lose sight of the gift that art gives to us as individuals.

And I saw it with my own children.

I saw their passion and their freedom up until about the age of seven for each of them,

And it must have been like a well-meaning teacher who was trying to teach them how to draw something.

And of course,

We all have our own styles,

And a teacher's job is to teach something,

And if that child can't keep within the lines,

Or they can't draw something representational,

They are therefore not doing it well enough within those confines.

And it's that that really caused me a grievance,

And that's what I feel so passionate about bringing to people,

Is there is no right or wrong.

When I pursued my art,

And I went and I did my foundation,

I had a nice time doing it,

It was good,

It was fun,

I was learning new ways of doing things.

And I started to use my body,

Because I'd always struggled with chronic pain,

And so I started to use my body as a way of,

It was like a catharsis.

I was then drawing my pain,

I was able to create something that symbolised what I was going through.

And that was such a therapy for me.

And so I really enjoyed that foundation year,

Because it was life-changing for me.

And then when I went on to do my degree,

It was a very loose degree,

And it was basically,

You had a studio,

And you created something.

At the end of the term,

You'd have a critique on it.

But up until that point,

It was really up to you,

You'd have a couple of tutorials,

But really there was no more interaction than that,

Which suited me perfectly,

Because I don't like being taught.

And so I have to admit that I spent most of my degree in a part-time job,

Because I didn't really know what I was supposed to do with that time in the studio.

I'd always worked from the premise that if I felt inspired,

I could make something good,

But there was no point sitting there,

Waiting for that inspiration,

Because it never really came.

But when it did come,

I could just jump into it,

And ride that wave,

And make something of worth.

Otherwise it felt like I was pushing water uphill.

It didn't feel like it was a natural way of creating art.

So I did my degree,

And I did really well,

Actually.

And then I came away,

And I started to paint,

Because I'd managed to go from a painter to a sculptor.

And I was making big,

Kind of,

Steel oil drums for my degree show.

And so I had to then translate that into painting,

Because that was what I could do within the confines of being at home.

And so I got a job in an art college,

As a technician.

And I would come home every Friday,

And I'd paint for the weekend.

And it was a wonderful,

Wonderful time.

I really enjoyed that.

But I felt like I was painting for other people.

I didn't feel like I was painting for me.

I didn't know what I should be painting anymore.

And so I was just creating things that looked nice.

It didn't really feel like it had that much substance.

I didn't feel like I particularly enjoyed the process that much.

And so for years,

I sort of dipped my toe in,

But then thought,

No,

I'm not an artist anymore.

Unless I can really devote time and energy to it,

I'm not an artist.

So I became just a mum.

And I don't mean that as I've said it,

But in my head,

That's what I was.

I now see the value,

Obviously,

In parenting.

It's a passion of mine.

But I didn't feel like I could join the two.

So I would kind of live vicariously through my kids and watch them making art,

And the freedom and the joy that they had naturally.

And so that kind of saw me through for a while.

And then I would work with adults with learning disabilities with art.

I would do art with them.

So again,

I was living vicariously through them because they've got that passion and the spontaneity and the lack of concern for how something turns out.

They were doing it simply for the joy of doing it.

And I really envied them for that.

I really,

Really envied them for that.

And then that all stopped because we had COVID,

Etc.

And something last year made me create like a drawing space in my bedroom.

And so I would sit there with a clean piece of paper.

My guidance,

My wisdom was saying,

Just sit there with a clean piece of paper.

Have no expectations,

No visual idea of what you're going to create.

Just create from that blank space.

And so I started to do that.

And I started to do that by playing with materials,

Which I've always loved.

As I look around me now,

I've got pens,

Like hundreds and hundreds of different types of pens,

Of inks,

Of paints.

And when I draw now,

I incorporate every single one.

And so that was what I started with.

Like if ever I'd get a new pack of pens,

Like gel ink pens,

Particularly love gel ink pens,

I'd sit there and I'd write something with each colour.

And so that's how I started my drawing journey again,

With that blank piece of paper.

It was like,

What do I really love to do?

And it was just to mess about and not try to create something for anyone.

Just to do something purely for the sense of loving what I was doing.

And so they became doodles,

Because when I'm on the phone to someone,

I'll just sit there with a pen and I'll draw squares,

I'll draw boxes.

I'll join those boxes up.

It's unconscious.

I'm sitting there,

I'm just moving a pen around the paper in a way that feels good.

And so that's how I continued.

And I decided that I needed to just start sharing things.

Because I want to spread this message that anyone can become an artist.

Because an artist is intrinsic within us.

It's innate.

The first thing we do when we pick up a pen is we make a mess.

As a child,

We pick up a pen and we make marks and we don't care what those marks are because we don't have the cognizance to care.

We just make marks.

It's like a primal instinct.

We've always done it.

And well-meaning people along the way have stopped us making those marks because we felt like we shouldn't be making them.

And so my goal is to get people to feel free to make those marks again because those marks are really important because they're yours.

They're something you have to say.

Art for me is hugely cathartic.

I have always used it.

I've had cancer twice.

And although I was only dipping my toe in as an artist at those points in my life,

I did take art back up.

I did start drawing.

I did start writing.

When my partner passed away,

I started writing.

Writing over,

Writing over,

Writing over,

Writing,

So that I could get the stuff out of my head that needed to be on paper.

And I felt better as a result.

I was once given a HND to run.

My boss had great faith in me.

I was a fairly recent graduate and I think he wanted fresh blood.

And so I was given this HND,

But it was like,

I can't teach people because my heart knows that whatever somebody turns out is what somebody needs to turn out.

I don't want to guide them.

I don't want to interrupt their process because their process is their own.

It's what makes their art unique.

It's what makes them unique.

It's what gives them a voice.

And it's what gives you a voice.

And art has massively been overtaken with the education surrounding it and contextualising your work within the art history.

And it's great if you're that way inclined,

But I don't want to do that.

I just want to make something,

Like a child makes something.

I want to make something with that freshness and that freedom that a child makes something.

Because that is pure expression.

You can't bottle that.

It is such purity.

And it is such a gift that we all have.

But people have been put off because they think they're not good enough.

And so I'm here to encourage people to believe that they're good enough and that what they have to say is really important.

Because it is.

It's hugely important.

Because it gives people,

It invites people to make a mess.

To give it a try.

I love Instagram and I will scroll through for ages,

But as soon as I see something that is slightly intricate,

It makes me twitchy.

Because I'm not in the slightest bit intricate.

And then when I see something which is a scribble,

It's like a purity of expression.

That gets my heart.

That's what I absolutely adore.

And that's why I love Instagram.

Because there is such a variety out there to suit everybody.

And so we all need to be making in order to just give someone else permission to do the same.

Because it could save that person's life.

It could save that person's sanity.

With me,

It helped me to heal my cancer.

Because it gave me a channel from which I could start looking at it in a more objective way.

I could get rid of emotions.

I could get rid of sadness.

I could get rid of fear.

I could put it all on paper.

And so I did.

With chronic pain,

It gave me a language which I'd never had before.

It gave me a way of showing other people what I was going through.

And that was priceless to me.

Because as a 19-year-old girl,

And consequently every chronic pain has been part of my life,

Sadly,

I've always used my art as a way for me to communicate that.

To get it out of my body.

To get those emotions out of my body.

And onto paper.

To get thoughts out of my head and onto paper.

It doesn't matter what it looks like.

It matters that you are trying.

It matters that it's your pure,

Unadulterated expression.

Because you matter.

We matter.

And so let's start taking the snobbery out.

And start injecting the pure,

Childlike joy back into art.

Because that's what makes people passionate.

Alright,

Sending you so much love.

Bye bye.

Reviews

Omgosh, I needed to hear this today. It reminded me of when my son was 9 months old, now almost 20, and I had taken my first ‘real’ painting class. I painted for a few years off and on, daughter born, and then it subsided with my (enjoyable) Mom activities. What this sparked in me was the memory of settling down to paint, tools at hand and then just getting into it. I forgot about the quiet, the freedom of my deeper mind, the flitting of my little mind and not having to do anything in those moments but ‘make marks’. I like that description. :) Keeps it light and free. Thank you for this.