Q&A On The Path

Join us to move forward on the path, not just as individuals but as a united consciousness. Bring your questions and wonder. Be honest and brave. And grow towards an awakened consciousness. (Carly is there...Don't miss it)

Transcript

Good so welcome let's start with a short ceremony as usual let's sit comfortably on our seat take a deep breath in and let's go and let's close our eyes and take another deep breath in and relax and the next breath in we keep in we don't breathe out and slowly breathe out and let go let go of all your efforts let go of everything that already happened in the past let go of everything that may happen in the future and allow your breath to guide you back to the present moment to whatever is happening right now around you become aware of your presence here upon your seat in the room that you are sitting in become aware of the presence of all the other people that are joining together for this session wherever they might be on the planet without straining your imagination just become aware of all these entities that are joining hands today make sure that your hands and your heart are open to accept the presence of these entities you may observe your breath as you allow the presence of these entities to enter the breath and the breath brings you back again and again to the present moment and with each breath your heart is softening and opening like a flower that blossoms just allow it to happen as you continue breathing and as you relax into that more and more come aware of the silence revealed behind the noise behind the white noise allow that silence to spread with each breath from the central point in your body to the periphery of your existence until it engulfs every cell of your body and there is nothing but silence you are silence another deep breath in slowly allow your attention to come back to your body and reconnect with the presence of all the beings in our virtual circle let's unite our individual intentions into one unified intention the intention to grow to develop to evolve the smile just take another deep breath in when you feel comfortable let me open your eyes hello everyone welcome again how are you all doing better now we are gathered here for this unique opportunity we give ourselves to join hands and walk the path together even if for a short while supporting each other's growth and growing not just as individuals on the path but also as a united consciousness and our journey forward will be propelled by the tension that hides between the question and the answer so the more meaningful the question is for you the more potential for growth is there so this is the opportunity to share any difficulty any hurdle any conflict anything you feel that is still blocking your freedom your inner freedom is there anybody here that is here for the first time i guess not good so who wants to be the first one to yes my first time in my space so welcome we appreciate your choice to be with us may i ask what made you decide to join this circle today was there anything specific she was they were brought here by whom maybe they listened to recordings recording cynthia is asking a question yes continuing to look at and be present with guilt from the way i raised my dot my beautiful daughter thoughts on that process guilt let's talk about guilt what do we know about guilt guilt is another manifestation emotion emotional manifestation of the gap that our consciousness resides in gap between what gap between what is and what i believe it should have been isn't that so when we have an idea about what reality should have been and that idea conflicts with reality as it actually happened then we suffer and guilt can be one manifestation of that suffering we believe things should have worked differently we believe we should have made better choices we should act we should have acted differently etc etc or other people or the situation we have an idea about an alternative about an alternative reality that didn't actually happen and we suffer some people are easy to blame the situation or other people some easy are easy to blame to blame themselves no but there is always a blame and that is poison i tell you that's not taking responsibility you know doesn't matter if you blame yourself or you blame other people or the situation you put yourself in this position of a victim and now you cannot be happy because why because you have an idea about what should have happened and you believe that idea let go of that idea reality is never confused only you can be confused confused by conflicting ideas so what to do know that you and other people can only do the best they can and only do the best they can in a given time it's not always beautiful and harmonious sometimes it's quite ugly but it's still the best we can do for a given moment we don't know how to deal with our own misery how to deal with our own suffering with our own drama so we act out of that conflict disharmony manifests into reality as disharmony and creates disharmonious reality but we didn't know better we didn't know better it's not because we meant to create havoc or to harm other people it's just the best we could do at that time and today we probably can do other things that are more harmonious to ourselves and to our surroundings that's the whole point of spiritual growth isn't it so instead of guilt have compassion because other people act out of misery out of suffering so when you confront with misery and suffering what do you do you add compassion or you were acting out of lack of knowledge out of ignorance out of misery out of suffering so when you meet when you are confronted with suffering what do you do you add compassion instead of guilt replace guilt with compassion you know let go of the idea that it should have been different it shouldn't have been different 100 percent how do i know that for certainty because it didn't happen differently and i stopped arguing with life i realized long ago that i'm going to lose this conflict if you want to live stress-free life you are encouraged to let go of these conflicting ideas as well this is up to you you see what i'm saying is it is it ever worth the time or energy to spend on in that guilt space guilt no you can learn from your mistakes definitely or you know your disharmonious actions and their influence on people you love or situations and you can you know grow out of this learning so next time you'll be in that situation you can act differently more harmoniously lovingly with an open heart definitely you can learn from that but feeling sorry for yourself feeling guilty about your past about your actions about your decisions and their outcome that's based on the idea that reality should have been different it shouldn't have been different if you realize that there is no space for guilt because there is no gap if there is no gap there is no guilt what are you guilty about isn't it cynthia says lovely and beautiful response thank you i am applying compassion now good good good um barbara says i'm finding tension where there is a question and i do not know the answer rather than tension between the question and the answer yeah that's exactly the tension that i'm talking about and this is excellent don't be afraid to ask the question just because you don't have an answer to it i tell you this is what propels the human evolution the consciousness expands using that specific tension so i tell you don't be afraid to ask the question and when you receive an answer say okay thank you and put it aside go back to the question there will never be an absolute question answer to your existential questions let me say this again there will never be absolute answers to your existential questions these answers are just there to help you take another step upwards that's it once you took that step put that answer aside go back to the question back to the question who am i what is the meaning of life why am i here what is the essence of the self etc you know these questions will be answered only in silence there will no be there will never be a concept an idea that you can grasp and say ah okay got it that's it my intellect has got the point there is no point to get you just keep on growing and expanding as you keep asking those questions so beautiful and lady tammy who's new said i listened to my higher self that's how they got here excellent welcome jesse says guilt and shame is a self-manifestation that is keeping us from the present so we get to be stuck and beat ourselves up yeah and even worse generate an identity around it who am i i am the one that is guilty that's that's who i am i i know for for me personally i had an experience where i had was feeling a lot of guilt and i i found that that feeling i couldn't intellectually make that feeling go away but once i was able to use almost like body somatic work um it it's like a different part other than my intellect or my mind was able to let that go explain body somatic um for me it it was like a um a dance circle so there was like there was this uh concept of uh of the outer part of the circle was made up of people that stood there and they sort of represented the the masculine so it was we started out with a with a partner um it was in a group setting so you'd have to be in a place where you felt safe enough to to tell your story and so i told my story to this person and then and then everybody else did the same and then one of the partners stood on the outside to create this circle and then all the feminine aspect of that dyad danced in the middle so danced or moved their body in some way and there was a really large drum so it was like this drum medicine that this beat of this drum was able to help move that story out of of the body and and let it go so it wasn't just thinking about oh i should change my guilt into compassion you know and and even though that is very helpful it took more depth to to get to that place where it was really residing to dissolve it or to to help it dissipate completely so that's just personally what i found very helpful so this is another way to let go of guilt whatever you need to do find your way but make sure that you lay off this burden definitely because there is no justification for you to feel guilty about anything you've done or didn't do reality is not confused definitely the piece about accepting that what happened that that that's what happened you know and and there was no um reason to think otherwise that piece really helped along with the rest of the work the only reason to think otherwise it's is because we use it to create an identity of a victim we use it to create an identity of a victim and victimize ourselves around that drama if only things would have been different then today i will be free i will be happy and that's never the case never ever universally it's an illusion nothing from your past can actually prohibit your happiness in the present moment your freedom in the present moment nothing doesn't matter what happened in the past as terrible as it may have been a free consciousness does not identify around past events it does not identify around anything but not on past events as well so if you feel you are engulfed with guilt or remorse or regret and all those you know emotions that has to do with your past find a way to replace those emotions with compassion and an open heart love yourself including any mistake you may have done in the past love yourself as you are not as you believe you should have been but as you are right now you see my point what else i was i was thinking that sometimes you have to get tired enough of that victim cycle yeah that you just you know it's like hitting a you know a ceiling where you just need to break free yeah punch it out you know i always said that desperation is a huge opportunity yeah you know if people are desperate i say excellent but go just go deep into despair all the way hit the bottom of despair you'll find a huge opportunity there for you to grow to grow because you feel there is nothing else to lose there is nothing else for you to hold on to and then you can really let go yeah that place of victimization can be quite comfortable definitely it's very easy not to blame other people blame situation my parents you know my bank account there are so many excuses why not to be happy or even a lot even just with yourself you know you blame yourself that's a comfortable place to be because you only have yourself to to blame and be accountable yeah and you can stay in that loop but but just see that when you blame yourself you always blame your outer shell right you blame your character you blame your personality you blame your decisions you don't blame yourself because you don't know yourself you keep blaming the outer rim of false identifications self-knowledge can take you all the way to the self that hides behind those outer shells and once you know yourself you realize there is nothing there you could blame there is actually no I that has a relationship with the self anymore that likes or dislikes something there that holds on to or have an aversions against so that push and pull relationship is not there anymore there is only bliss there is only bliss then the guilt becomes irrelevant irrelevant it drops I tell you the cure to any human drama any human suffering is universal and one and that is self-knowledge the more close you are to know yourself all the problem seems to evaporate you don't need to deal with your problems they don't exist anymore you realize these are all illusions let me tell you a story I went to my first time I met my teacher one-on-one my teacher is called Shri Ravi Shankar he's based in India in Bangalore and the first time I met him you know I saw other people coming with questions and you know and he's answering and so I felt I wanted to join that type of conversation so I came with a question my question was I have this inner conflict between the masculine and the feminine within me and you know there is always a tension there and when I give attention to one the other is crying for attention and and I can't balance it what to do that was many years ago that was in 1996 or 7 and he was smiling and he said that's not a problem and he just smiled and of course in that moment you really feel that all the story is just vapor there is no substance in it it's just a story you're looking for drama to make life interesting to to justify your own existence who am I without a drama what's the point and then you realize how beautiful and intelligent this answer is it's not a problem what else Gary says I've been asking the question but the answer won't quite come out don't wait for the answer stay with the question I tell you don't be frustrated because you don't know the answer stay with the question the point is to stay with the question and keep on investigating don't wait for this definite answer to reveal itself to you and even if you come to a point in life when you think you got it put it aside you'd never get it it's not for you to get not for you to get just rejoice with the mystery stay with the mystery Jesse says the these past experience experiential traumas that are buried in our bodies and our subconscious they must be released from those deep cavernous programs and that possibly show up as guilt and shame forget the word must the only thing you must do is to be born and to die and this is given you don't even have to worry about that you were born already it wasn't up to you and you will die and that's not up to you so there's nothing to worry about don't tie yourself with all those musts you know you just create an idea that makes everything rigid do you see what I'm saying this must happen that must happen and before it will happen I will not be able to etc etc yeah it could happen that you need to release those blockages you know and if you do then release them but it's just another way to victimize yourself in relationship to reality because you have an idea that something is not released yet and until that will manifest for you somehow as a release then you'll never be able to be free and happy and accomplished no that's not the case nothing should happen other for you to wake up that the only thing is waiting you to wake up what do you need to wake up what should happen for you to wake up what should happen for you to allow your heart to be open what else should happen the answer is nothing if you sit there waiting for something to happen I tell you you condemn yourself to a life of waiting for something that will never happen an awakened consciousness is not awakened because something happened it's not unique in any way it's just woken that's it ask yourself what else should happen for you to be awake and if you have an answer for that drop it it's a false idea based on ignorance you don't still know who you are really if you believe something should happen then that's it you're stuck there are three types of doubt the first doubt is in myself I'm not good enough I'm not ready I'm not prepared I'm not ripe or because of my past I'm lost that's it I'm damaged goods this is the first type of doubt the second type of doubt is in in your journey I doubted I doubt my my decisions I doubt the methods I doubt the spiritual path that I take I need something else I need something more whatever dynamic more physical more many ideas about the path and the third type of doubt is the doubt about the teacher that you choose to follow no what does he really want I'm not sure maybe I need somebody else his intentions are not clear those are the three types of doubts that you will find I tell you doubt is like an anchor that ties you to the ground you cannot move with life not move with life life flows and you're stuck because you're doubtful if you really want to be flexible and move with the flow of life burn your doubt how how to burn your doubt make a decision you know do your homework study investigate whatever decide yes or no doesn't matter it doesn't really matter seriously we think that we should be making the right decision and awakened consciousness realize there is no such thing as right decision whatever you choose is good just follow that wholeheartedly that's the point the point is that you follow that your choice and the consequences of that choice full heartedly with no doubt with no inhibitions you know I'm not sure maybe I should have go back to that junction and take the other turn no no that's when you get into confusion and split consciousness and your heart is closing you're not available doesn't matter all the rivers flow to the ocean doesn't matter if you go from the left or from the right you will go to the ocean whether you want it or not isn't it it's amazing how free you can feel once you once you really take in that you there you have no control and no no and and that nothing really matters it's sort of a strange place to be you know because then you sort of think well what's the point then yeah no point the point is you just flow with your open heart and add your consciousness to that fantastic process of evolution give that as an offering to the divine truly I'm here for you they will be done almost anything can feel joyful in that in that space forget almost yeah really everything can it's so it's interesting how we to to separate out the ideas of you know good and bad right and wrong painful pleasurable you know these balls and cones yeah these dances between these two spaces but then when you use a word like joy we tend to intellectualize that as a good thing you know or even peace or love these are considered good you know maybe you wouldn't find those in hell or something you know but but anything can be can be that even something that your intellect would say oh that's bad or that's wrong or that doesn't feel good yeah you you can find in that tension you can find that place where it's like wow and and then life is just playful and fun and joyful and joyful yeah yeah if you haven't listened to the seventh level of existence series I encourage you to do so and specifically regarding what you just said listen to those two chapters about the intellect I am not my intellect you can find those recordings on my inside timer web page I am not my intellect regarding suffering and I'm not my intellect regarding fear it's very important you realize all the drama is born there in your intellect yeah Brooke was saying her dharma teacher was telling her the same thing that Guruji said to you it's not a problem yeah Jesse makes a good point they say you make it sound so easy and I think it's such a again this is also on this spectrum of it can it it either is this or that you know it's either a long process of letting go and doing your work and la la la la la or it's like that and it can really be both strangely it can be both because of you if you decide it's a long process and a difficult work and a huge mountain to climb guarantee you this will be your reality if you decide that this is an impossible task then 100 it will be impossible for you why because this is the story you tell yourself and you believe in and this manifests as your reality because reality is the manifestation of the story that you tell yourself not just about your spiritual path but in all regards if you decide that relationship for example is a complicated arena full of pain and misery I guarantee this will be your reality if you decide that relationship is a it's a garden where you can actually blossom in actually blossom in this will be your reality why because this is what you manifest if you believe the spiritual path that we are describing here is difficult it will be difficult I tell you awakening is not a challenge it's not an accomplishment it's not a reward at the end of your journey gratifying you for your efforts let go of that idea you are already that you are that there is nothing to achieve or to accomplish you are that you are whatever you long for peace joy love you are it this is the material this is the essence of who you are always been and the the challenge is not to get it the challenge is to go back to the origin point the the realization of who you are who you are already you know it's like a beggar sitting on a mountain of gold coins but completely oblivious to the mountain you're just just looking at this empty plate that is holding in his hand begging for you know 10 cents or because his whole awareness is about what he doesn't have and he's completely blind to the bounty that he already has ego ego ego I want I need what will I gain out of it um brooke made a point back in a little while ago about stopping stop thinking which is sometimes a good um thing to employ because we get wrapped up in our stories and our thoughts and our emotions so stop thinking I didn't get it I don't know if it's so much about stopping the thinking but more just letting the thinking go by without attaching to it why do you want to stop thinking your happiness your joy has got nothing to do with thoughts that's the point that's that's her point oh don't worry about trying to stop thinking it's impossible anyway trying not to think about apples for a minute can you don't think about apples at all did you manage to don't worry about thoughts thoughts comes and goes ideas opinions a dozen a dime a dozen a dime a dozen whatever you just observe like we did in the beginning of this session observe it gary says I see i'm using the stuckness as a scapegoat yeah let go of those ideas about yourself I should have been in a different place in a different position I should have been more more advanced in my journey let go of those conflicting ideas Joanne is asking what should I do more details what should you do about what you know I have an answer for this question actually wow when people ask me what should I do usually they are more specific but it doesn't matter because the answer is the same you do the right thing and how do you know what the right thing is it would be what you have done if there was no fear guiding you there is only love if your doing is an expression of an unconditional love then you know this is the right path this is the right choice then you do that even if you're still afraid doesn't matter if you are conflicted between choices and you're not sure which which path to choose from and what to do next you know just think what would I have done if there was no fear in me at all I was Buddha if Buddha was here in my shoes what would he have done or Jesus or whatever you know and there was only pure love flowing through me where would it flow was would it be left or right you just follow that and you see this will take you the quickest way back to the ocean hmm hmm Joanna says yes sorry it was very open that was a great question I agree Cynthia says doubt means double-minded and there is only one mind choose this day whom you will serve Jesse says some humans suffer painfully from PTSD post-traumatic stress PTSD post-traumatic stress disorder a condition that may last months or years with triggers that can bring back memories of the trauma accompanied by intense emotional and physical reactions that can be paralyzing yeah yeah we spoke about it I recommend you go back there is a course there on inside timer called dealing with trauma find it listen to it we go in details how to reshape our relationship with our past and the traumatic events that we have experienced but for now I would just say this let go of the idea that it shouldn't have happened let go of the idea that it was a mistake a terrible mistake there are no mistakes there are no mistakes and if it happened it was because you could have experienced it with a with a full heart and a willing soul and because you you didn't have that knowledge back then it created a scar in you which we call trauma but moving forward from this point onwards onwards you go with that knowledge nothing life can suggest can be too much for me to experience fully nothing I am bigger than any events I am bigger than any occasion bigger than anything that life can throw at me I am the theater hall and the events are just a play that is happening currently in the on the stage but I am there to include everything to allow it to be experienced full-heartedly like a theater hall this is who I am let go of the idea that it was too much or it shouldn't have happened or anything like that it's such a empowering experience to to grow that big and to really know that nothing is too big for you yeah this is self-knowledge in action this is the whole purpose of spiritual journey this is why we're here to realize that to be awakened to that nothing in life can destroy you you are eternal life is temporary it passes everything changes you are eternal shows replay you know shows are changing you know sometimes it's a comedy it's a drama it's stand up sometimes it's a concert you know shows are changing but the theater hall is there to allow it you are that consciousness that space life cannot destroy you doesn't matter how dramatic the scene is currently nothing can actually destroy that space isn't it you are that wake up laura's asking no little self yeah yeah ego compassion when you are engulfed by ego you just add compassion and it will pass or do you mean the child within some people use that concept of the child within to develop their their masculine feminine balance to be that protector of that child who was abused or traumatized that child is there it's not a mistake don't try to heal that child it's there to cry it's there because life touched you and it was painful you cannot heal that child that's trying to fill a bottomless pit it's not going to happen that child will keep on hurting and crying and just accept that and go beyond it if you are under the idea that i need to heal that inner child in me and until i do i'm not able to move forward then that's it you're trapped you see you put another condition that you are as you are is not good enough something else another version of me should emerge then i will be available for all this now but not now you see it's just an idea that child is there good let him be there if he's crying good let him cry you can hug it you know and and and fill it with love and compassion but don't be attached identified with that that's an illusion maz asking how to let go of fearful thoughts so there is a course full course called fear versus surrender i encourage you to listen to that course it's a great doorway to realize how fear controls us and governs our decision making process and how to over grow beyond fear and be free of it so i'm not going to spend too much time today talking about that it's already recorded just go there and listen to it just know it starts with you realizing realizing that you are governed by fear and you are influenced by fear and your decision making is a result of fear when you realize that already if 60 of the work is done and then you are you are welcomed to confront this question do you really want to grow beyond your fears do you really want to be free of fear and that's not a trivial question at all many many people i'd say majority of people don't really want to grow beyond the fear it's too frightening you know i'm so identified with my fears then who am i without my fear too much i don't i don't want to go there you know so if you really want to grow beyond your fear and you mean it then you can do it 100 you can listen to the that recording and and and do it and it's all there all the explanations and the methods you can use listen to it laura says i can brace i can embrace him or her the little the little person inside them thank you and jesse says in the face of fear do it anyways yeah so cynthia and jesse have some issues with some issues with this idea that you know not that you're saying that trauma is easy to deal with or any of this is easy um but this idea that bad things there's horrific things that happen in the world were meant to happen or to accept them as they are and not put some sort of judgment on it so cynthia says what about childhood sexual abuse great example it shouldn't have happened i now know that it didn't happen that is the spirit was never scathed so it's the memory of the thinking mind that can come up from time to time only to be awakened again to the actual truth that i was not touched the body is a housing for the higher consciousness identify with my spirit and that's true so that seems to be just don't don't don't put yourself in a spiritual bypass you know i cannot be touched by life only my body can be touched not me no no no no no don't don't try to avoid the pain just by creating a bypass you know i'm not saying that you do i'm just saying be careful that you don't life is there to touch me through my body i am there available i am day to experience pain because pain is there sometimes and i am there to experience pleasure because pleasure is there sometimes life can be both and i cannot be free if i keep on trying to grasp this and avoid that craving and aversion craving and aversion no this is the the base of suffering according to the buddha don't don't try to pray for rain but then run between the drops to stay dry if it rains then you accept it and if it is sunny you accept that you accept that you see what my point and things happen they are not good or bad don't give them this title you know this is the intellect trying to create some order for you so it will be better for you easier for you to swallow it it's not good or bad it's happening sometimes i need you to carry a child and sometimes i need you to kill a child because you know who i am you stared at the sun but i am the one that loves changing from nothing to one isn't that beautiful leonard cohen you don't know and you're not here to know good or bad let go allow yourself to be free to experience whatever life has to offer pleasure and pain jesse also along that same point what about suffering of those that are in war sex slave victims of crime who are suffering without a voice constantly in physical and emotional pain so when you say suffering is that gap between thinking of what is and what it what we thought it should have been is there any is there any type of suffering that's that's not in that gap no there is a there is pain there is a lot of pain for sure suffering is self-generated don't worry about the suffering of humankind worry about your own suffering if you want to solve the suffering of humankind that's great start with you and when you stop suffering i tell you start radiating love that will be the greatest help you can provide to this planet and when you stop suffering is when you close those gaps and you stop believing that reality should have been different you stop believing that this is a mistake god was confused yeah god is never confused you are confused let go of those ideas that's your responsibility that's your area of responsibility and when you close those gaps you become an expression of an embodiment of love and that the greatest gift you can give to this planet a free consciousness available to experience life yes this is what you're here to do don't worry about the suffering of humankind the only time you can actually go back you know this is bodhisattva what we are talking about was already spoken of 2, 600 years ago what is bodhisattva is that consciousness that is self-realized you know the story about the buddha was that he was when he died he entered the gates of heaven and all the and all the angels were waiting in line you know there was a red carpet buddha is coming what a great honor and and as he came to the gates the golden gates open and that's it heaven was there for him and he put one step one one leg in but the other leg stayed outside and he couldn't actually go all the way in so the angel encouraged him come on you're buddha of course you can go to heaven and he said no i can't go i can't go i can't go when parts of me are still suffering i choose to go back and keep helping people keep helping all the creatures go beyond suffering then i will go then i will be able to enter when there will be no more suffering this is bodhisattva but you need to be working on yourself first otherwise what you're trying to do you you come with that idea that there is too much suffering the world is unjust you know and you bring that frustration into your good intentions of course you will create havoc because you bring that disharmony into your actions you manifest that disharmony you are unpleased with reality you cannot be a soldier in the army of peace there is no such thing if you are a soldier then you go and fight then you go and fight if you really want to contribute to world peace be peaceful you see what i'm saying what else i was thinking of the story of the uh the monk who was tortured in tibet and you know in a chinese prison and and he he's able to somehow be released or escape or something and he he finds himself in a trauma the you know world renowned trauma center in the united states you know and it's this wonderful place to to treat people who have experienced traumatic events you know where they've experienced torture and war crimes and all this kind of stuff and you know he sort of is they're they're asking him all these questions and he's saying well i i'm okay i don't need this this treatment or therapy and they're thinking he's crazy you know he's been through this terrible terrible thing and he says no i'm i'm i'm fine i what i feel is i feel you should be treating the the person who tortured me in the chinese prison they are suffering i'm not suffering at all they're the ones that are suffering and they're thinking like you're crazy you've been through this whole this whole thing but he accepted in the moment exactly what was happening to him and just maintained compassion for his tortures and he could see how much they were suffering through that experience yeah so trauma cannot leave a mark on you when you are in this state of consciousness of acceptance and love that nothing can be perceived as too much anymore uh cynthia in response to what what she wrote yes i'm speaking of this being unscathed from a point of much healing and therapy and meditation i see your point clearly and really appreciate you good good not to say that i have never used spiritual bypass i am doing that less and less good good i'm sure we all do that to a certain extent um oh and joanna says what about when we torture ourselves same same thing you know we torture ourselves because we're so frustrated with ourselves we're so angry about ourselves because we live in the gap we believe that we should have been different we should have been more mature more advanced we should have learned by now we should have made different choices etc etc and we are frustrated because there is this gap so we punish ourselves we blame ourselves we feel guilt all that or we torture ourselves we torture ourselves if we're really upset so what to do close the gap close the gap let go of conflicting ideas about yourself accept yourself as you are love yourself as you are with your everything included advantage and disadvantages and once there is no gap i tell you there is no suffering no frustration no anger no violence anymore jesse says great story about the monk all about compassion it's a hard place to get to yeah but you know usually no chinese is uh torturing you you don't have to go to those extremes you know you deal with your own little drama in the grocery shop or in the stoplight with your boss with your partner or sometimes your deep your own deep wounds and traumas yeah laura is asking what my name is it's carly cynthia um answered i guess we didn't introduce me at the beginning uh gary says my youngest son had apparently i need glasses sorry i'm getting closer to the screen here my youngest son had plenty of trauma as have i he kept telling himself that it wasn't his fault and that he was lovable until he believed it then surrendered to god and walked right out of anxiety and depression he's 26 and still works at it fantastic yes yes you can be an inspiration laura says oh nice hi carly hi laura so what do you say i'm here just to answer i mean not answer he's here to answer i'm here to speak your questions because of this format sometimes your own has a difficult time reading all the comments and questions and we don't like to miss anybody and it's good that somebody can vocalize you know the voice of the voice of the sincere seeker and sometimes because your typing is limited i feel like i can read into what where you're going with this because i also have the same questions when he speaks some of his things like what are you talking about i don't get that and you're just all around lovely isn't she how am i supposed to wrap my head around that it's ridiculous yes so enough for today i think we've covered a lot so see if you can apply that i will put the recording of this session so you can listen to it again you know share it with your friends think about how much good we can spread around us if more and more people would join this path this this intention to grow beyond our drama and be free of it beyond our false identifications so don't be shy to spread that light around you spread that knowledge spread your open heart be a living example of what it actually means to be free you can inspire and be a source of inspiration what do you say barbara says lovely is right nice to have you back carly blessings to both of you i'm uh i'm a midwife so if i'm not here i'm usually delivering a baby somewhere so i apologize that i can't always show up for these but i really try um jesse says thank you for being here carly you add much dimension and grace to these beautiful discussions you're very welcome thank you and cynthia says your honor carly i'm feeling like i won the jackpot lottery by tuning into your lives powerful and beautiful wow thank you wow it's really amazing to have such a wonderful group of people here with such insightful questions yeah and that provide depth to the conversation and let's spread that around us let us you know be active in it with this intention you know expand this umbrella of grace so many people can be included thank you guys for being here for sharing that time with us and for your donations they are very helpful and looking forward to meeting you again this coming tuesday evening no not this tuesday sorry right we have a passover dinner on tuesday tuesday we have a passover dinner i'm sorry so in a week we'll meet same place same time jay go there