There Is Time

In this track, we will hear Tony regales us with tales of what he calls stockbrokers & hungry ghosts. This is a track that can be used to face our fears of feeling alone & misunderstood, & give space for expansion on all levels.

Transcript

You We begin the transmission today so do find a comfortable place to come back to inner stillness,

Place where there is no outer activities or disturbances that take you away from your practice,

From the practice of coming back here to this moment and just being totally present to this moment.

Do make sure that if there are any devices or phones or whatever technological gadgets there that create disturbances,

Do make sure that they are removed from the space,

From the space of spiritual practice,

From the space of mindfulness,

From the space of just being aware of all and everything rather than just of those specific gadgets.

As you breathe in and breathe out just allow for awareness to extend beyond the mundane that which we know and understand.

To start with the mundane on the outer level,

So the telephones,

Gadgets,

The different things that need our attention on the outside,

Whether it be cleaning up or tidying or catching up on something or completing another task,

Just make sure all those things are set aside so that awareness of this moment has the expansion or momentum to encompass everything,

Even those things beyond the mundane that sometimes our minds,

Our sense of awareness doesn't even have time to really understand or comprehend.

Well actually there is always time but it seems to the mind which lives in a time frame of space and time and dimensions that time is something that we have to chase.

There is time,

Let me catch up with it,

Then we keep running for the rest of our lives after that sort of elusive time space concept or continuum maybe,

Just continues in the wonderful way that we know to just elude us.

But now in this moment there is no time,

This moment is timeless.

So as you let go of that mundane structure that makes it necessary for you to do those things on the outer level at least,

As you let them go you may be aware of a sound or you may be aware of,

Oh I have to do this,

Later on I need to complete that,

You may be aware of such activities but your presence,

Your sense of communication within the experience is not chasing that continuum,

That idea,

Oh there goes time.

You are not chasing anymore,

You have sort of decided to be here,

You have decided inside of yourself,

Ok it is good to be present.

Not sure to what maybe,

Maybe because you are so used to being present to those outer concepts,

It is confusing what to do with your time,

But there is no time,

This moment is timeless,

But that is even more confusing because perhaps the idea of not doing anything and not knowing when to begin and when to end is very confusing for the mind.

So as we let go of the outer mundane world you may not want to do this,

You may end up sitting in meditation and then it is just one thing after another that is occupying your time,

So some part of you doesn't want to do this.

And if this is the case,

It is ok,

Just watch the not wanting to do,

Just watch the mind that is stubborn and wanting to continue its addictive sort of nature to gobble up all sorts of experience.

A bit like a hungry ghost,

Give me more,

I have had enough,

No I am always hungry,

I want more.

Have you had enough?

No,

No,

No,

No,

No,

I haven't even begun to satisfy my needs and desires,

I want more.

If that little aspect of the hungry ghost within yourself comes back to life when you are sitting in meditation then it is no longer a ghost,

It seems like a real thing that you have to address right there and then,

How do you address something that isn't really there,

It is just a creation of your mind?

Simply be present.

So just watch it like you are watching all things,

Not just the mundane,

But your senses are aware of all things,

All the subtle forces of nature,

All the beautiful spaces that surround us and are within us and around us and within the universe and beyond the universe.

Our awareness extends to everything,

It is not limited to one perspective,

Even if the mind is hungry and wants more.

Oh there goes time again,

I have got to chase that.

I forgot,

I had a moment of,

I don't know what,

It was just peaceful,

But okay that is enough,

I don't need to understand that moment because I have got more things that I need to chase and there goes your mind,

So we realise that the internal dynamics of consciousness,

Awareness,

Are always disturbed not just by the outer circumstances,

Whatever they may be,

Justified or not,

Important or not,

Decided upon or not,

You know sometimes we decide okay I just want to spend my day chasing things,

You know it is what I want to do,

I am happy doing it,

I want to be a stockbroker and you know stand there yelling,

I want to buy,

I want to sell,

I want to buy,

I am not making fun of stockbrokers,

But you know if that is what you want to do then you need to just be clear,

But if it is creating agitation or creating stress or negativity in your meditation then you have to understand maybe it is not what you want to do,

Maybe the hungry ghost wanting you to do certain things in certain ways,

So the addictive nature of your personality or the addictive nature of your,

How you are,

Just how you do things,

How your feelings are or how your thoughts are or the structures that support such,

Perhaps it is not what you want to do but you are almost manipulated into doing things in a certain way,

Say if you have certain desires whether they are conscious or not conscious they are there,

Making sure that the mind is agitated,

Making sure that those inner forces and outer forces are created to continue and agitate you in certain ways where the hungry ghost remains hungry and wants more,

Maybe another one pops out of the woodworks just to make fun of the situation,

Well it is not fun really when you have two,

Three,

Four,

Five different levels of needs and desires and we know we have thousands and then it almost seems impossible,

We sit there in meditation and we have moments where we expand beyond the mundane and then the mundane speaks to us but not only through the outer,

Also through the inner dimension of experience,

So not only do things happen on the outside,

You know of course the mundane things and health problems and emotional intense transformations and challenges and mental ones,

No we have the inner dynamics that come to play and join the party,

You think okay just as I began to sort out things,

You know I have put away the gadgets,

I have turned the computer off and I have sort of tried to make it as still as possible,

I sit here and I have got another thing that is going on which is even more complex,

My own inner world,

Take a deep breath and embrace that,

Oh the mind says I do not want to embrace that world,

I do not even know what that world means,

It is so hidden,

So much part of the subconscious,

So much part of the karmic realm of manifestation,

I just do not even want to go there,

It is enough to have to interact and deal with all the mundane things,

Health,

Emotions,

My own mind,

People and their situations,

Their thoughts and feelings and their own minds and just practicals,

I do not know of,

Just be present,

There is no need to know anything,

The mind does not need to always be in control,

Being present requires that presence comes not just from the mental space that you are used to living and experiencing the world through,

But it requires that you are present on all levels and to give space to all those levels to expand and to begin a very different form of communication,

So yes as you sit,

I remember sitting in meditation for a very long time and after a while it got more and more difficult,

It got easier and then it got difficult again and the difficulty was that okay the outer was all sorted and monastery is made easy,

You know the outer is sorted to a certain degree and the structure is created so that the outer is sorted to a certain degree but then the inner world came up,

Definitely changing the externals of how I think and how I feel and how I interact with situations in that moment but also with the energy consumption that creates the inner world,

That was in itself tiring so I would sit in meditation and I was so tired of that game that was being played out but I did not know what the game was about,

I did not know where to begin,

I did not know how to begin,

I did not know if there was anything that needed addressing and what the steps that needed to be taken,

I was in a state which in meditation is known as going down,

Down to the underworld,

Sometimes it is seen as in the sort of religious language hell,

Such a horrible word,

Who invented such a word I do not know but you know that place I remember as a little child,

I always thought that hell or I do not know if there is another word for it in English,

Was like this place and it was actually physical that you could experience on the physical level and it was like I had to be careful not to fall into the earth because it was down there,

It was very hot and there was someone down there,

Can you imagine this,

So funny when you look at it,

It is just as funny to see people's more advanced perspectives of the underworld but just so that you see the little child you know and understand how funny it is when we maintain and give energy to such a structure and so hell was this little place and there were cracks in the earth and I could fall into the earth and then I would fall down and there was this fiery person holding like this whatever pokey type stick that you know just there to poke you and say you have been bad,

So I was afraid of being bad,

Can you imagine that,

Have I been bad and sometimes I did not know if I was bad or not because I was just naturally wild so everything I did was bad,

Can you imagine a little child trying to just have fun but you know doing things of course which an adult sees as difficult to accept as good you know so if I climb a tree and I am almost falling out of a tree you know the parents out of love of course worry so I did not know what was bad,

What was good,

I had to orientate myself and get to know the structure I created in my own mind,

The hell that I created in my own mind,

Wow,

Now that is not easy if your mind says well that is not really something that you have created for yourself,

It is because you are bad that that happens to you,

This sort of if you are a victim to any situation believe me that is an advanced form of the fun I am making of myself of the hell that I believe to be truly real,

Ok I never experienced it,

I never fell down that crack,

I never saw that little person poke me with whatever but in my mind it was just as real as anything else and more real because it was there in the background haunting me you know and making you know it was like this force that I had to struggle with because it was just there all the time you know I was every time someone said oh don't do that you are bad,

Am I going to go to hell,

That is how the child thinks,

Every time the victim program that creates its own hell falls into this space of victim meaning that you activate the victim program that is like the little child inside of me asking am I going to go to hell now,

Am I going to be punished for being bad,

Am I going to be thrown into a little fiery cave and left alone and not loved and not cared for and not understood,

That is the biggest fear for a child,

That is the biggest fear for an adult but you are creating the separation,

Now this is not to make it more difficult but just to understand you are creating this separation that is allowing for the space of victim,

When you are a victim it means that you see yourself as alone and separate and misunderstood,

Treated badly,

Horribly,

You keep going back to pictures in your mind oh why did they do this to me,

Why wasn't I loved more,

Why wasn't I understood,

Why the victim asks why,

Is there an answer,

So you sit in meditation I need to find my answer,

The victim is asking me the hell that I have created inside of my own structure and my own personalities asking me why,

Is there an answer,

Can you imagine,

You know the little person I imagine to be under the ground,

That fiery person and I ask why are you there,

Can you tell me,

Do you think he will come out and say look yeah I am sorry I didn't mean to be there but I am an illusion,

I am not real,

I am just a figment of your imagination,

I am your creation,

Of course not,

So what to do,

As I sat in meditation I needed to face my fears,

That's the internal world,

Most people will project those fears onto the external world,

I am afraid because of,

I am afraid that's the reason and will bring the energy because they can't cope with the energy that's being generated,

They can't cope that little fiery person isn't real because it's holding onto the structure,

Then they will say oh it's because I am bad,

Because I am this,

And find justifications outside,

It's because I haven't whatever,

Because of this,

That,

Whatever,

Outside world becomes the world where you can change the inside world,

I change it on the outside and it must change on the inside,

But you have created your own hell,

It's a figment of your imagination,

It's horrible for sure,

I didn't enjoy that little person chasing me with that little stick saying okay you've been bad,

Here I am chasing you,

I am chasing you,

It's horrible,

But it's you chasing yourself,

There is no one there,

Hell was created by manipulators,

It's not real,

Whether it be religious belief systems,

Cultural belief systems or social family constellations,

That's a creation of humanity,

It's not reality,

Reality always comes back to harmony,

Equilibrium,

Always there is no hell,

But even if you say that to yourself you don't believe it,

I am not a victim,

You might say to yourself,

I am not a victim,

Huh,

Do you think that's enough,

Of course not,

Just to say that you are not something doesn't make you something else,

You know that,

It's just like saying I am perfect,

Love myself perfectly,

I am the perfect,

Perfect whatever,

Does that mean your actions correspond to your thoughts or your ideas that you are sort of embracing as your new self,

You have to work with your fears,

I had to face that little person,

You have to face the victim,

You have to face the hell that the victim has created and say to yourself is this worth my energy,

Is this worth my time,

Is this worth my awareness,

Is this worth giving myself to,

Is this worth my breathing energy,

My feeling energy,

My mental space energy,

My personality energy,

My communication energy,

My everyday living energy,

See if you do that and decide as you sit in meditation as I did sitting in the monastery,

Okay,

This is ridiculous,

This game that I have played with myself since I was a little child is just totally ridiculous,

I don't need to play that game anymore,

It's just really ridiculous,

As soon as you have that thinking,

It's called discernment,

As soon as you have that thinking happening not just as an outer justification or picture but as a deep core realization within yourself then everything changes,

You turn the world,

Your inner world upside down and the fear of course has to be understood and you work through the layers and it is difficult of course and it takes time but already that discernment has led you to the conclusion,

The very clear conclusion that things are possible,

So rather than give your energy to hell,

To the victim,

To that negative belief system that's creating the separation,

That's creating hell,

You're giving your energy to your potential,

As soon as you do this everything listens,

So as you breathe in and breathe out and let go,

Embracing the awareness of your potential from a new perspective,

Letting go,

Breathing in and breathing out,

Knowing that perfection is the state,

The true state of reality,

Then all is perfect,

Your spiritual practice is perfect,

This moment is perfect just as it is,

As you breathe in and breathe out you celebrate the perfection,

You embrace perfection from joy,

Happiness and bliss,

Breathe in,

Breathe out,

Letting go,

Deep breath,

Let go,

Let go,

Let go,

Let go,

Deep breath,

We now continue with the Hu meditation.

We now continue with the Hu meditation.

We now continue with the Hu meditation.

We now continue with the Hu meditation.

We now continue with the Hu meditation.

We now continue with the Hu meditation.

We now continue with the Hu meditation.

Reviews

Thank you Tony. I enjoyed this!