When we were kids,
They didn't bring us up on the healthy,
Wholesome nourishment of play and work and beauty and the pleasures of the senses.
And as we grew older,
The pleasures of the mind.
Oh no,
They gave us a taste for a drug called approval,
A drug called making it to the top,
Achieving,
Affirmation,
Triumph,
Victory.
They gave us power,
Reputation,
Fame,
Prestige.
They gave us this drug.
And you know something?
We began to feel good.
It was kind of a giddy feeling,
A great feeling when they were applauding us.
And we started thinking,
Well,
It was great to be famous.
It was great to be successful.
It was great to be made much of.
It was great to be popular.
Result,
As we began to grow,
They could control us any way they liked.
All you have to do is withhold the drug.
Boy,
If you haven't gone through this,
I salute you.
They don't approve of you.
How uneasy you feel,
How restless.
They criticize you.
They're not affirming you.
Withdrawal symptoms.
You're crawling back for reassurance.
And your psychologists are writing books telling you,
This is the way to be.
More of the drug.
More control.
You know,
As a result of doing this,
You've lost your ability to love.
Because when you need someone,
You cannot love that person.
Do you know why?
Because you can't see that person anymore.
When a politician needs votes,
He stops seeing people.
When a business woman or a businessman becomes crazy over money,
They stop seeing people.
When I want something out of you,
I'm not seeing you.
I want to get something out of you.
And you know,
My dears,
It's so bad that 24 hours of the day,
Consciously or unconsciously,
We want something from the people around us.
We want their approval.
We dread their disapproval.
We're scared they'll reject us.
We're scared what they think of us.
How could you love people like this?
When you're so dependent on them emotionally?
Oh,
We got to depend on one another.
They'll tell you grandly.
Of course,
We've got to depend on one another.
That's how society is built up.
We share the labor.
We share our charism.
That's marvelous.
I have nothing against that kind of dependence.
The evil is to depend on another for your happiness.
To depend to depend on another for learning,
For cooperation in the work.
That's wonderful.
For food.
That's fine.
That's fine.
To depend on another for your happiness.
That's the evil.
Now you cannot love.
Give it a thought later when you have time and leisure until you stop depending on others.
Till you die to the need for people.
When you first get in touch with this,
You know,
It's terrifying because you suddenly become alone.
Not lonely.
Alone.
It's a strange feeling.
You suddenly understand what you've been all along.
But you never saw it.
And you suddenly realize how lovely it is to be alone.
Not to need others emotionally.
And for the first time,
You understand that you can love people.
You don't need to bribe them.
You don't need to manipulate them.
To impress them.
You don't need to placate them.
At last,
You can love.
And for the first time in your life,
You are incapable of loneliness.
