Real Life: Compassion On The Journey

Tending to someone in their last hours opens the mind to greater awareness of our vulnerability and our mortality. If we could become more conscious of these limitations from which all of us suffer it would encourage us to take better care of one another including the difficult people we meet.

Transcript

Dear friends,

Welcome to another of this real life series of reflections.

Today we are going to take a look at the need for our exercise of compassion on the journey between life and death.

Before we begin,

Let's pause for one minute to give thanks for our presence in this time and place.

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Let's spend one minute in respectful memory of this good lady.

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Welcome back.

As I held Mary's hand in what turned out to be her last hours,

She unspokenly gave me the inspiration for this meditation,

Which I share today with her Insight Timer community.

Mary wrapped her hand around my thumb as tightly as a baby always would.

This instinctive grip brought more directly to my mind the thought of our common journey between life and death.

When we look at a baby or a young person,

We do not normally reflect on the shortness of life.

It's not obvious to us that the journey of life can have its ups and downs.

It's circumstances that can sometimes make our behaviour fall short of what we would wish it to be.

Circumstances can make or break a life,

Can turn us into saints or sinners.

Mary's baby-like grip on my thumb was a reminder to me that we need to exercise more compassion for one another on this journey between our coming into this world and our departure from it.

Let's pause for another minute,

This time to reflect on how we might increase the store of compassion on the journey of life.

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Welcome back again.

So as life's end draws near,

What can we do to help?

The gift of touch is important,

Letting someone know they're not alone.

The gift of kind words.

We are told that hearing is the last sense which a person loses.

We are whispering words of comfort,

Thanksgiving and forgiveness.

We are inclined to be our own hardest critics.

In our last moments,

We will for certain regret the things we have done or things we have left undone.

We all need to be reminded of the good we have done.

We need to be inspired in some way to do our best.

As has been said,

We are not bad people trying to be good.

We are essentially good people trying to be better.

And in Mary's case,

We played some music gently near her ear.

It's said that the mind can only hold one thought at a time.

She was dressed,

A little agitated.

So the music of her early years brought her to a place of calm.

And among the songs,

The happy lilt of Kei Sera Sera.

And Vera Lynn singing We'll Meet Again.

I believe that the wonder of our being is not something that can be limited to the physical or snuffed out at death.

I pray that in Mary's case,

And in the case of all those who are near and dear to us,

The promise of that song will become reality for us all.

That we will somehow,

Somewhere,

Meet again.

The unspoken lesson of Mary's baby-like grip on my thumb made me reflect more on how we are all born and how after a time,

We all die.

If we could be more conscious of our vulnerability and our ultimate mortality,

We would show more compassion not only to the people we like,

But to those whom we find more difficult.

If we could recognise the vulnerability and the ultimate mortality of those with whom we might feel a sense of conflict,

We would approach them differently.

And that different approach could change us and,

Through us,

The world.

That is the lesson that Mary taught me and now you,

In silence,

In her final hours.

Namaste.

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Reviews

Compassion..........
I wish everyone in the world could listen to this,and everyone of your meditations.Thank you!
Namaste 🙏👼🙌🌻🌹

Thank you Tony for your wise words on compassion. So helpful. Namaste.

I am truly grateful for your beautiful, warm and kind words...Thank You Tony🌊💫 You are a wonderful blessing.
Sending your lady friend light and love...

Thank you Tony for this timely reflection for me as my dear husband died 9 years ago almost to this day… Thank you for the pauses for silent reflection in your contributions to Insight Timer. Beautiful, thank you 🙂

A timely meditation for me. Thank you for your voice. Namaste 🙏🏻

Always enjoy your meditations and this one especially hit home. My father in-law recently passed and we were with him for his final hours to the last breath. He too was seemingly asleep...breathing peacefully on his own. Not responding tho. I felt he knew we were there so talked with him. Told him how I loved him etc. also played him beautiful Mozart he had always enjoyed. We occasionally held his hand and stroked his forehead. We just sat and bantered as I crocheted and my husband read. We noticed a change in rhythm of his breath and got the nurse. By the time she came he had passed. Peacefully. I felt we had been with him to the edge of the realm. Thanks so much for expressing this call for compassion. 🙏💗

Excellent compassionate meditation practice, Thank you 🙏

What a beautiful lesson thank you Tony for sharing your experience and wisdom bless you 😇

Tony may your dear friend resr in peace, blessings to her family and friends. Namaste 🙏

A few months ago, I had the honor of being with my final living grandparent in her final hours and as she passed on. It was an interesting juxtaposition of an intense intimacy, sharing that time, while simultaneously recognizing she was making this journey solo, despite the presence of family. She was peaceful as she left us, with just a single simple tear as she closed her eyes. It was profoundly moving, and I am grateful to have been there with her. I am also grateful to you, Tony, for sharing your experience and for verbally painting such a touching tribute to your friend. Life is shorter than we think. Compassion is so very important. Again, thank you for this. I see the light in you. 🤲🏻❤️🤲🏻

In honor of "Mary" ..namaste 🙏

I was honored to take a minute with you to remember the life of your friend Mary. The image of her grasping your thumb in her last hours is a beautiful one. Thank you for this meditation. 🌸🌺

Beautiful. Thank you, Tony. Your words are a great comfort to me and, I’m sure, many others on this journey. ❤️

Thank you ever so much for this meditation. It confirmed to me many things that happened during my late mother transitioning. Blessings,Tony !

Thank you so much, Tony. We needed to hear this. We did not know about the sense of hearing being the last sense to leave.

Thought provoking...
Thank you Tony
(and thank you Mary)
Namaste
🙏🏼✨🕊

God rest Mary's soul. A beautiful compassionate friend you are Tony. I am so sorry for your loss. Namaste.

Beautifully compassionate teaching Tony. Blessings and Peace to you in your loss. You help us to notice the power of touch and music as we seek to be present with our loved ones as they transition. Thank you. 🌻🐢🦋

Very appropriate at this time, as I had intended to contact my 94 year old uncle today, who I have not been in touch with for a long time. Sending love and compassion to you and all the beings in the world in need of some.🙏💖