Being Mindfully Happy

In this Zone Show podcast, I talk to Frances Trussell about how she moved from depression, and a career in broadcast journalism, into a world where she teaches people how to be mindfully happy.

Transcript

Hi,

I'm Tom Evans and welcome to another Zone Show and I'm thrilled and excited today to be speaking with Frances Tressall.

Hi Frances.

Hi Tom,

Thank you so much for having me on.

Oh it's a great pleasure.

Now we've got three things in common haven't we?

One is we've both come from a career in broadcasting.

Two,

We find ourselves perhaps unexpectedly being mindful as meditation teachers when that wasn't necessarily what we thought of as our path when we were at school.

And three,

We're both speaking at the wonderful Mindful Living show on the 2nd and 3rd of June in London.

So welcome.

I love coincidences don't you?

Absolutely and they appear to us more and more once we start to get into mindfulness,

All of these serendipitous little happenings which are lovely.

And do you think that's then because if you've got a quiet mind and you start with a quiet mind having meditation today and that extends into the day you become better at noticing them.

So these serendipities are happening all the time to everybody but if you've got a busy mind you miss them perhaps.

Yeah absolutely we just don't pay attention when we're lost in our heads and we open our eyes in a completely new way as we become more and more mindful.

I was very recently on a retreat and I kept getting this image of a tiny little red spider.

We used to have them on the wall by my house when I was very small.

I kept getting this image coming through and then I've gone on a walk on the retreat and there on a tree trunk that I was kind of staring at enjoying was one of these tiny little red spiders.

And I told somebody that story yesterday as we were standing next to a tree while on a one-to-one in a beautiful park bushy park quite close to me and we've looked at the tree and he said you're not going to believe it there's a tiny little red spider there crawling along.

And actually a fourth coincidence is we both live in Surrey quite near to each other which is quite amazing.

So what was your transition then from broadcast journalist to mindfulness teacher?

Well it feels like another lifetime ago the broadcast journalism.

I was very news obsessed always had been since I was quite small and absolutely loved broadcast journalism felt very very passionate about it.

But as many of us do got sidetracked and waylaid and burnt out by the world of broadcasting and by the time I left I felt very disillusioned by it.

Part of my waking up from the broadcast journalist world was this kind of sense that I had been focused for so long on all of the worst things that were happening everywhere in the world.

And it became apparent to me that this wasn't reality actually.

As a journalist we're kind of pumping the worst stuff into everyone's home and everyone's minds when actually the good by far outweighs any of the bad that is happening in the world.

And we can all get a very distorted view of reality when we're very immersed in the news.

So stepping back from that for me has been such an enormous liberation and has helped me to see the world in a whole new way.

And did you did you just go and learn to meditate or did you go on a course or what was the what was the actual transition for you?

The transformation of things.

So during the depths of my I was very very depressed but still coping struggling through having various different coping mechanisms which were not always helpful.

But actually one day I think it was probably about 10 or 11 years ago now I was in a coffee shop standing in a queue and the guy in front of me was talking to his colleague about a book that he just read that had completely blown his mind and changed his mind and that book was The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.

Oh I know it well yeah.

And so I overhearing their conversation went out bought the book straight away and it really resonated with me on so many levels.

There was quite a lot in there that I didn't get that I didn't understand but it sparked this flame in me and a ferocious appetite for wanting to learn more and more about the power of entering fully into the present moment.

And that's how I discovered mindfulness.

I then started going off on retreats and as a constant over thinker which is what I had been my initial response was to learn everything and to want to do all the courses and all the in coming at it from quite an intellectual place.

But then the more that I entered this stillness something else opened up in me and I've been really lucky to study with lots of different people.

But actually it's not in the studying that we're mindful it's in those moments of silence.

And so now when my students come along and week one lots of people say to me is there a reading list and what should I be reading.

And I say to them if you've got time to read then you need to be doing more meditation at this stage.

And then the reading you know the reading will come and it can be a useful tool.

But actually it's in non doing that we do our most learning when it comes to mindfulness.

So when you started learning about this stuff then you're learning obviously because you were stressed and you had this depression and stuff like that.

Were you learning about it because you thought you'd become a teacher or when was the point you thought I could help other people doing this.

No it was never my intention to become a teacher.

But I think many of us find that when something is so enormously transformative and for me it completely transformed the way that I was experiencing my life.

It was like waking up from some kind of daydream that I'd been living in to this vivid and vital reality that that was there all along but I hadn't been aware of it.

And the impact was so great on me that that I felt utterly compelled to teach it.

I couldn't not teach it because I just thought how doesn't everybody know about this stuff.

There are so many people out there who are depressed who are anxious who are miserable who have addictions all of the things that had impacted upon my life that could be helped from this.

And so when when you've experienced the transformation yourself you know that that is a gift that is it's partly a duty to offer to other people.

And do you find then because you don't look like the archetypal mind-boggler's teacher you know you haven't got the the orange robes and you've got loads of hair in your head and all this other stuff and you're a mum obviously you know you don't know which is the job in itself.

Do you find then that the fact you're a very normal warm loving person that that actually helps people say well if she if she can do that and she does it and benefits from it then I will too.

Through and through people find their right teacher the right teacher for the right person shows up and I am not going to be everybody's cup of tea because because we can't all be that but actually I tend to find that the right people are drawn to me and I'm drawn to them and that relationship then kind of grows and people are compelled to go out there and start spreading the news themselves and actually that is just wonderful.

We're both on the Mindful Living show and partly I've kind of snuck on it because my it's my students who have set it up it's two lovely ladies Alex and Carly's at the head of it all and they both individually had attended courses of mine and been so kind of inspired to start getting out there and helping other people find out about mindfulness that they decided to set up this wonderful show and so I've been feel really fortunate to be to be involved and to also watch and how they've created something quite spectacular just through this sense of drive and passion for getting the word out.

Now I'm just on the interweb at the moment because men can multitask so I can't interview somebody and look at a website at the same time and I've just seen a fifth coincidence would you believe you and I speaking at exactly the same time now I hope it's in different studios but if it's in the same one it's even better so I won't be able to come to your session and you won't be able to come to mine but and your sessions about being mindfully happy which I think is a lovely motivation to adopt mindfulness you know it's not about being worthy or pseudo religion you know you're quite secular in your approach.

Do you think that that that the that mindfulness is a route to happiness?

Yeah absolutely it's yeah it's the route and the destination we so much of the thing that we're trying to do in our life is to actually be happy I mean what motivates us to do anything why do we get up in the morning why did we bother getting a job or getting married or having children we behind all of that is usually this desire to be happy and yet we forget in the process of of doing these things and being our roles that that is what we were looking for and we forget how important the being bit is to being happy and and actually in training ourselves to just stop and smell the roses along the way to actually be there for the the story at bedtime and not be thinking I need to get through this to get to one o'clock or whatever it is we might be in a rush to get to next that is the essence of being happy is being able to be in the moment no matter what the moment is because actually it's usually only our mind that is making the present moment an obstacle usually there's pleasure and joy and happiness to be had in most of the moments of our life.

So if it's a route and destination how does someone start?

By finding their breath it's as simple as that it's as simple as a single breath we can't breathe in the past we can't breathe in the future we can only breathe now and if we fully focus on the breath as a starting point and really arrive at how wonderful it feels to breathe this kind of connection that we have with everything and everything around us all of the all of the breathing animals and the breathing people we're all doing the same thing and how wonderful it is when it's when it's our last breath we would be grateful for it and actually there's this sense of new beginnings and and joy that we can find in every breath if we really kind of hone it down and just arrive to where we are.

Well listen the Zoho show is not just about us chatting it's also about doing so would you just take the listeners through a very simple breathing exercise right now?

Yeah absolutely.

Thank you.

So just being where you are nowhere to go nothing else to do just finding that breath zooming in first of all on the air around the nostrils and noticing how the air is slightly cooler around the nostrils as it enters the body slightly warmer as it leaves again following the journey of each breath into the body and out again noticing the opening up of the body to the breath and that sensation of letting go letting go every time that we let go of the breath we're letting go a little more there's always a little more that we can let go of and our breath is always at anchor to now always the present moment as we breathe following the breath all the way down into the deepest part that the breath reaches the rise and fall in the abdomen and just being here being here in the abdomen amid the rise and the fall sitting in the rising and the falling life is this constant process of this arising and falling as we breathe as the sun rises and goes down again as the waves and the tide goes in and out and all we need to do is be here in the breath and we remind ourselves what is real in this moment so what is real for you right now in this moment the sensations that are present in your body any fizzing or tingling or movement colours and lights behind the eyes layers of sound layers of silence the taste in your mouth any breeze against your skin the texture of fabric against your skin and the breath always there to guide us home to ourselves and then wriggling into your fingers and toes becoming aware of the outer edges of your body maintaining that focus you've developed can open your eyes and hello Tom.

Hello again thank you for taking us through that lovely journey that's wonderful so you do a lot of courses don't you obviously in locally to you but also you've got some amazing other products and services on your website I'm quite intrigued by this service the RTT the rapid transformational therapy how does that all work?

I am fascinated by the mind aren't we aren't we all Tom?

We are.

For me having worked for years with people and to try and shift them out of victim consciousness quite often we get stuck and certainly I for many years was I had a big old cross to bear and I had these big luggage bags from my past that I was dragging into my present and projecting into my future and sometimes we all need a little bit of help to kind of put the bags down and see things as they really are and for me my mindfulness work very much works on this level of consciousness and that is so wonderful and so transformative but for some people there are things going on in the subconscious that those imprints are really holding them back from their ability to be really present and that they find themselves going back into self-limiting beliefs and patterns of behavior which are unhelpful and so I went on a bit of a journey really to discover what things may help assist and put the baggage down and it's been wonderful I've been really lucky to train directly with a very famous hypnotherapist called Marisa Peer who is Mrs.

Celebrity Therapist she's always kind of jetting around the world helping all sorts of people overcome things and I was really fascinated to work with her because she has such wonderful experience and also to pair that with my other mindfulness training and my focus on bringing ourselves back into now so that we can make the most of our lives and it's been a wonderful journey of learning and discovery and so RTT is called Rapid Transformational Therapy I've never been a fan of elongated talking therapies where we rake things over for years and years for some people that may work but for me and I was somebody who suffered with childhood depression and depression throughout my teenage years I had quite a bit of therapy and for me it was a process that I didn't find that helpful and so I wanted to if I was going to enter into any kind of therapy work for it to be really really fast really rapid and just get to the nub of it rather than keep raking over it and that is why the bringing together of rapid transformational therapy really excited me and bringing that together with mindfulness has just been so wonderful and nowadays I am incredibly busy with that and I know busy is one of these sort of is it a negative word I love what I do and I'm very fortunate to every day get to help people leave the past in the past which is just one of the best gifts but yes there is a balance with all these things but I am loving my mindfulness based RTT work essentially mindfulness will always be at the centre of everything that I do but it is wonderful to be able to help people free themselves of the past.

And you also take mindfulness into schools with it is it dot B training?

Yes absolutely so I have done quite a bit of mindfulness in schools work which is wonderful what the mindfulness in schools project is doing is fantastic for me these days I am a big fan of my work one to one with people I think that my small groups are really lovely when I do group training and so for me that has been more of my focus these days but what the mindfulness in schools project is doing is fabulous and had some of that been around when I was younger perhaps it may have saved me some of the pain and heartache that I went through but who knows and actually now looking back I think I personally had to go through we all have our own journeys and I had to go through some of that to put me in the position that I am now to be able to help people in the best way to have been so depressed I always say but actually I am very grateful for all those periods of depression because it has equipped me to be able to help people in the way that I can now.

And obviously everybody that gets into mindfulness they are not necessarily everyone is going to become a teacher what is a mindfully happy place like for people that want to keep their day job might be a mum how is it different from the world that they are in at the moment?

I think that we can make it a part of our lives and we should make it a part of our lives no matter what it is about squeezing more juice and loveliness from life and when we do that actually we are all teachers in a way we are teaching our children so often people and I do still train children I do one to one work with children as well but actually so many people come to me and say how do I teach my child mindfulness and what should I be teaching them and actually really we need to be learning mindfulness from our children I watch my four year old playing and he is the most incredibly mindful being and he is so absorbed and so happy and so joyful in the moment and actually quite often what we are doing as parents is training our children out of mindfulness there is this kind of obsession with constantly labelling things and constantly having tasks to do and this fear of boredom that actually pervades all of our society we are all petrified of being bored for even a split second and so the best thing we can do with our children is let them know it is okay just to be and it is okay to be bored and it is okay to be sad and it is okay to be whatever we are and that is mindfulness and being able to just you know get down there with the kids without instructing them and just to be around them and what incredible teachers we are if we are able to do that so we are all teaching whether we realise it or not.

Oh fantastic that is very wise and very sage so obviously you have got several places on the internet where people can find you and obviously they can come and see you in person on the 3rd of June at the Mindful Living show and I am going to be very gracious and say you have got a choice of sessions you can go to Francis' or you can go to mine.

Go where the energy takes you that is the way to go isn't it?

Yes.

It is a great show Alex Joyce has put some amazing people together I think all the top people in the mindfulness community in the UK and some from abroad are going to be appearing virtually as well so 2nd and 3rd of June that is mindfullivingshow.

Com it is going to be a great day I think Ruby Wax is turning up Ed Halliwell some wonderful wonderful teachers and it is just going to be very interactive lots of learning lots of mindfulness across all sort of aspects of life with food and nutrition and health and gardening and creativity I notice as well and also the scientific community coming on so it is going to be a great show.

So we can meet you in person there and where can people also dive into your work?

Yes absolutely so mindfullyhappy.

Com tells them all about local courses and you can access some of my blogs and there is also the mindfully happy podcast which is on iTunes and that can also be accessed through the mindfully happy website and there is lots of free meditations and guides on there for people to enjoy kind of step by step building blocks of developing your own mindfulness practice so that you can get to a point where you can just sit out like I have just been doing in your garden listen to the sound of the birds and close your eyes and feel confident that you have got a little toolbox in there to draw from and just be able to dive quite deeply into some meditation.

I notice you are very active on social media as well as Facebook and Twitter so people can find you there too.

Yes absolutely Facebook and Twitter I have only recently come to social media I had had a bit of a social media fear slash aversion but actually subsequently to I did a television show earlier in the year and everybody had said to me you have to be on social media and actually it has been it has been wonderful to use it as a tool to connect with so many incredible people so many incredible teachers and there is such generosity in the teachers out there people are so willing to give away so much of their work and thoughts and inspiration for free because we are all so passionate in just getting stuff out there and making a change in the world a change to how people feel so do come and connect with me on social media I am mindfully happy and it is at Francis Trussell and then you can find mindfully happy with Francis Trussell on Facebook as well.

Yes it is amazing how meditation teachers share that passion to want to share and give their work out because I know you have got loads of free meditations on the mindfully happy podcast and I would love to introduce you to the wonderful people at the Insight Timer app where I share a lot of my most popular meditations freely and we share this desire to get the whole world meditating one person at a time because it creates a better world for us all.

Yes absolutely we are dropping a little pebble of happiness in that pool and all the ripples are going to touch everyone.

Fantastic well thank you so much for dropping by the Zone Show podcast today I suspect and I know that this is going to be the first of many conversations because I know you have got some projects in the pipeline that sound really exciting that we ought to talk about on the Zone Show and I am looking forward to meeting you in person at the Mindful Living Show on the 2nd and 3rd of June.

Absolutely I should be hanging about giving free hugs to anyone that wants any.

Right I am first in the queue for the Zone Show,

Fantastic.

I look forward to seeing you then it has been a joy and a pleasure thank you so much and thank you for sharing that lovely guided visualization of meditation with us too.

Thanks.

I have been Tom Evans and you have been listening to the Zone Show and you can find loads of books,

Meditations and resources to help you get in and stay in the Zone on my website www.

Tomevans.

Co.

Reviews

I really enjoyed it. I’m reminded of lessons I still need to learn. Namaste.

I found this conversation very enlightening and the guided visualisation was relaxing and powerful thank you both for your insights. 🕊

Always a pleasure to listen to a Tom podcast and expand the mind and potential knowledge to move forth with a light heart and positive outlook. I also left the news behind, from politics to frolitics. 😬 and creativity of course. 🙏🏼

Great interview, I am intrigued by the rapid therapy concept.

Very interesting, not really a meditation except for one little bit.

My first ever podcast! Totally worth the time. Thank you!

This interview really resonated with me. I Love how she emphasizes mindfulness as a means and destination to happiness. Just what in needed to hear!

Thank you, once again, Tom, for your gentle education. Thank you for introducing dear Frances to us. I learned quite a bit from both of you today. Namaste 😊🙇

Delightful interview and mindfulness practice. Most inspiring, thank you guys.