And so in recognizing these truths,
We see a permission to lay down everything out there,
Which again is a release of the blame,
Which is also a forgiveness,
A recognition of what's true,
That this pain isn't really about something out there.
And so then we ask,
What is this pain really about?
And again,
It's not finding the right words,
Because it's not the words,
More so it's about how honest can you be with yourself.
And the conclusion of the answer that you're going to find is some version of,
I'm so scared.
Maybe also,
I'm so scared and there's so much I just don't know.
And in that terror,
You will find a belief that sees yourself as terribly inadequate.
And in some way or another,
That is all human emotional pain.
Do you see the difference here?
This sort of radical honesty compared to the knee-jerk reaction that just wants to blame somebody else?
Whether it's the most minor irritation or whether it's somebody not showing up and therefore your plans don't work out and you find yourself devastated,
Do you see that underneath all of that,
The pain is really about being afraid and also feeling terribly inadequate?
Or we could also say,
Losing the thing that we are holding on to that tells us we're worthy,
That tells us we're lovable.
This is all to say the same thing.
And if this is true,
That it's all this innocent misunderstanding that's simply not seeing things clearly,
Then the only way to bring healing is to see things more clearly.
Which is also acknowledging the truth of the matter and surrendering to the truth of the matter and stop fighting for something that is so obviously not true.
Because you'll notice this also,
In whatever pain we're carrying,
We're fighting for something that's not true.
And to say it quickly and briefly,
We're fighting for an illusion of ourselves that isn't really ourselves.
You see,
Every human being has this image in their mind of who they think they are.
And they construct this image that essentially says,
This version of myself is worthy of love and so I want everyone else to validate this image.
I want everyone else to see me this way and not that way.
Because if I can maintain this image,
It'll keep me safe.
And this goes in so many different directions.
You could even say that we're on a quest to avoid being judged.
And it's all in service to protect this image of ourselves.
And this image,
Of course,
Is also referred to as ego.
And all the while,
This ego character is so incredibly unreal.
It's an image of yourself,
Which is the same as like a photograph.
It is so not what you are.
Do you see how this image of yourself is very threatened by your vulnerability?
I wonder if you're willing to look at that,
Because it's so profoundly true.
The image of yourself is so incredibly threatened by the raw authenticity of what you are.
And what's happening inside of you.
Which of course is why the image of yourself tells you it's not safe to look at this pain.
Do you see what's happening here?
Is that the image of yourself is saying the truth of you is not safe.
And it's true.
As it relates to holding on to an image of yourself,
The truth is a disaster.
And yet,
Underneath all the noise and behind this image is a voice that whispers,
I wish I could just be myself.
I wish it was okay.
For me to just be authentic.
I wish I didn't have to constantly perpetuate this image and protect it and fear its loss.
Which is to fear what other people think.
I wish I could just be.
And you know what that's saying?
I wish I could just be?
That's simply saying,
I wish it was okay for the truth to be the truth.
And that's a very vulnerable space because it invites you to let go of everything that you're holding on to,
Which is only in service of protecting the image.
So that's a scary space.
And in that deep space of vulnerability,
What you will find there is what appears to be the exact opposite of the image you're holding on to.
