Restoring Heartfelt Connection; A Guided Somatic Meditation

This guided meditation focuses on the effects shocks/trauma to our heart have on our body. This meditation will go through several experiential exercises while providing education/insight throughout the session. The meditation will guide the client into exploring bracing patterns of the body caused by unresolved shocks to our heart and open a dialogue with the heart and the mind, to help restore communication and connection between both centers.

Transcript

Said this first part we're sitting and these will be tools that you can take with you as well when this slumped posture this slumped posture not only indicates like shocks to our heart center but it's it's I'm depressed I'm low I'm not feeling good enough myself or you know this there's so many messages that come with with this posture so we want to slowly try to open that posture to to open up that heart space so I'm going to ask you guys to just start with in a sitting position and we're going to actually just go into that posture into the slump where your body almost naturally feels like it wants to go but we're usually try to restore that posture but just just let it be where it wants to go and just sit there for a moment where does that posture want to go notice any and thoughts and sensations that are coming up and now bit by bit we're going to slowly come out of that posture and we're going to do that centimeter by centimeter so we're just slowly going to start pulling ourselves out to where our spine is straightening our shoulders are down we feel this space between our ears and our shoulders if we had a string pulling us the top of our head up to the ceiling and take a couple nice deep breaths there in that position and checking with your body noticing in this upright posture what sensations are you feeling picture the chest is spreading open widely picture your forehead is opening imagine the forehead opening wide chest opening what do you know what are you noticing when our hearts are in distress or in shock we have our muscles brace when our muscles breathe breathing stops right when we're in shock and we're in this frozen position we're not breathing so this next part along with trying to hold your your posture upright but also if it wants to come down to come down be with it but then allowing it to slowly come off so with your breathing um what we're going to do is um we're going to i'm going to give you a different a different breath but when we're taking these deep breaths to really bring that life force back picture your diaphragm opening which is right under your lung like an umbrella when you open an umbrella and you see that top open when you inhale that's what should be happening in your chest that the diaphragm is opening and the umbrella is open good and when we exhale we want to be picturing blowing out that type of blow so what we're going to do is try this breathing exercise just a few times where we're really noticing these images and when we're exhaling not only are we blowing out with birthday candles but we're making a voo sound so it's almost like v-o-o okay you can do that the deeper you can do it um is better but it's very regulating to the vagus nerve um so we'll do a couple breaths together so we're going to inhale and hold and when we exhale blowing out the birthday candles and boo let's try that one more time together inhaling opening up the umbrella exhaling blowing out the birthday candles and just for a moment check in with your body what sensations are you noticing the other piece of this when when we don't breathe it actually indicates to that alarm center that there's something wrong so that in addition to fight flight freeze responses it's indicating worry so one way to help with that help with that opening is is when we were doing our posture that helps but focusing on the bait the cranial base opening up this space where the communication travels and so whichever way it's comfortable i want you to just place the hands at the cranial base and like 45 degree angle we can be like we're slightly looking up doesn't have to be all the way ascending that can be really uncomfortable but just enough that we're slightly looking upward and as you're holding i want you to start to shake your head yes and no go all the way over until it meets resistance you don't want to go past your point and noticing your eyes shifting noticing as you're slowly going back and forth so you're just supporting that turn supporting that opening and that's helping to not only open um it kind of brings that that bracing pattern that holding pattern that frozen pattern and it's stimulating the communication and opening up the chest and the heart space and now let's try that same pattern doing yes and pulling yes up until we feel like the tension in our scalene on our we don't want it to be uncomfortable bring the chin in until it's uncomfortable we don't want to go past that point so yes notice the opening noticing the space that you're creating each yes and now just take a moment you can place your hands on your knees that was a lot of movement so you want to just kind of re-center yourself and check in with your what are you what did you notice after going through that any sensations coming up okay so now um when we see these see these these braced patterns we're going to explore them i want you to picture that when we're holding back when this when this is being held back this this our heart space it is like our life force is being restricted and um that lack of movement is from these protective barriers these walls the reason we're closing is the protective barriers that we formed as a result of the trauma of the shocks the rejection you know so that's all what's buried underneath um the other piece of this is this holding this this freeze is almost trying to predict like that the pain is going to happen again if you think about it because it already happened it happened in the past we were hurt our heart was hurt but this pattern is like we're bracing for something when it's coming if you think about it you know if there was something being thrown at you you're getting raised you know in the present moment but our bodies are using this as predictive behavior for the future so trying to predict the future by using your past by the past trauma as a prediction for the future and and the minute we start to use prediction even in our minds like i think this is gonna this is gonna happen or my fears are coming up we will just go back and go bracing for impact so um it's a it's it's also part of this exercise is to just be aware of that we in sematic we really try to be like present like we don't want to be in the future we don't want to be because there's so much attached to those areas and um try not to let the predictive behavior be impacting us um so when we have these traumas even if it's developmental trauma or or as we've grown um the too many shocks when we've had too many heartbreaks when we've had too many shocks to our heart it causes depression it can cause this collapse of the body this fear we know the breathing stops sending messages that something's wrong we're bracing um and and and this bracing pattern has a story um there's something to it there might be more than one story but right now go through a little exercise for this this brace and see if we can get some um some resolution there so this is going to be like a meditation but sitting okay so you're close your eyes or fix your eyes on a particular object and i'm just going to guide you through this how to explore your bracing pattern the pattern that your body's holding so let's take a nice deep breath together holding you can use your hand or center if that feels right for you um you can center with one hand on the chest one hand on the belly and we're just going to ask our body is there a brace area in my body right now that needs attention does the mind have a story to tell us about this bracing this bracing pattern what what event or events does the mind see as the cause does the heart have a story to tell about this bracing our mind story and our heart story can be very different a few minutes but asking the heart why am i bracing what are we protecting ourself from what are we afraid of what from the past is trying to predict the future now invite your mind and your heart to reflect compassionately on each other on each other's experience my story was what the heart story was either way they both need they need understanding they need support and encouragement and even and asking what support does the heart and mind each need to help release some of this bracing to help make a little room to be a little more open a little less braced as you're going through this dialogue whatever comes up there's no right or wrong answer there's no right or wrong sensation there's no right or wrong image any sensations that you're noticing in the body we want to help this dialogue this communication to come to the surface we want to allow the body the heart and the mind to know that it's safe that it's safe to release a little bit just a little bit let go of some of these some of these patterns it's safe to allow the heart and the body to come back to life and i want you to kind of say that to yourself it's okay for my heart and my body to come back to life you're giving that permission to your mind and to your heart and each breath each deep breath that we take we're making a little more room and more space to come back a lot of times with this bracing with these shocks to the heart our throat our voice is also we're not speaking our feelings or the throat might even get that frozen feeling the throat the throat is part of the vagus nerve it's all connected it's coming from you know picture from the gut through the back up through the organs heart into the face and through the neck so so we want to be able to to know that it's okay to use our voice as well to express how we feel that is part of breaking through these protective mechanisms is is being able to communicate with ourselves with someone else so the next part i'm just going to ask you to just gently place your hand on your throat and just notice what that self-touch kind of feels like gently holding you can play around with it you can play around with the position but we're just giving that throat support you could even make a little if it feels right for you to make a little humming sound as you're holding you'll feel that vibration it's also very toning to the vagus nerve but letting your voice know that it wants to be heard it deserves to be heard and every time you speak through your allowing your feelings to come out that you're breaking another layer of that protective barrier are directly connected also to our heart so anytime we're using touch anytime i ask you to use touch on your hands on different parts of your body it's your you're using touch with the heart if that makes sense like the hands are the extension of the heart so think about that as you're placing your hands on your on your throat so when we talk about our hands kind of being cut off from that brace pattern with the inability to reach out or to or to push away knowing that our hands are connected through to our heart space this when you put your hands out to your side this electromagnetic field that your heart is connected to go six to twelve feet out so when you put your hand out your heart your electromagnetic heart feel breathing so when you're um so that when you feel like in someone's presence you can feel their energy there that that is actually that's how powerful your your heart the energy that comes from your heart is so even just noticing like all this space that you have like this is yours and you can do you don't have to be stuck in this this pattern anymore that you can be open and explore this space that's all around you and spread and spread it um okay now we're going to um before we go to lay down onto our mats i just want you guys to take those hands that are these extensions of our heart and just rub them together like you're warming up on a cold day and as you do that i'm going to have you just gently place them onto your face sit in this nurturing hold just a few moments noticing what that feels like what it feels like your hands being placed on your cheek what sensations you're feeling you could even gently rub a touch to your cheeks each touch is bringing those areas back to life and take the hands and place them on feel your breath noticing the connection to breath and touch now move one of your hands to an area that's not breathing or pulsating just one of the hands this could be a knee somewhere on your leg a shoulder and just notice the difference of each sensation feel that life that life force that comes with these conscious breaths good and when you're ready i'll ask you to just transition down to lay flat onto your back or your bed at home you can use your bolster you can use a pillow but we want to give that back some nice support resting on the back of a chair on a bed on your mat and if you get your blanket if you can get a blanket that would be great or pull something up over top of you when when we have our blanket tightly in our blankets this nurture surround containment it really gives the feeling um of a womb a womb like state and it it recreates that feeling as um as we were um in in that place as it gives us that inner child um feeling and it lets that child part of you be comforted when we're almost buried in the blanket we're covering that nervous system and we will start to see release even happen curled up and you can start to feel that release when that child part is comforted because we feel safe and we feel held so we're letting the back feel held right now your bed your chair it's holding you so any areas that are still braced we can let them go we can let them down and let the floor support us and we can let them rest and we can let them support us and letting the blanket be a support holding us in it's giving us that support that nurturing feeling that our heart desires and craves for more give these areas our back that support our chest support really that support as we center this touch this attention just this little bit of attention we give these areas will begin to open slowly feeling safe feeling held and for just a moment we're going to let go of any thoughts from the outside focusing just our attention now on our heart center our chest the middle of your chest just being aware of your heart as a space visualizing this heart surrounded by peace and subtle light the light might appear as white pale pink or blue don't strain to find the light of any kind all you need to feel is whatever is there just resting your attention easily on your heart center breathe gently and sense the breathing flowing in and out of each inhale and exhale breathing gently and just following that flow as it goes in you may want to visualize a soft pastel light coolness or warmness that pervades the chat but we're just noticing the breath the flow and the rhythm going in and out of the heart space so for the remainder of the meditation we are going to have a dialogue between your heart and your mind your heart may want to begin to release emotion memories wishes fears dreams that have long been stored inside let the experience be what it is and if you daydream or you drift off and even into sleep don't worry just bring your attention back to your heart center when you drift allow those thoughts to come in and go easily and comfortably it's common for the mind and the heart to be a stream or in a bind with each other a collaborative relationship between the heart and the mind must be developed to transform any self-hatred arrogance criticism dismissiveness shaming and harshness they may engage in towards each other and to ease their mistrust of each other connecting the heart and the mind can be an anecdote to harmful disorganizing beliefs to states of pain fear hatred or confusion or when there is resistance overwhelm and hopelessness connecting the heart and mind can be an anecdote to all so i'm going to invite you to check in your heart and your body and ask are your heart and mind in harmony or do they override or minimize each other's needs inviting your mind and your heart if they're not in harmony what are their concerns you know for example your mind might want or desire connection what your heart wants that why or vice versa do your heart and mind approach each other with respect curiosity and interest or do they override or minimize one or the other what their needs are what their wants are what their desires are you want to take a moment to acknowledge the emotional and relational shocks that your heart has sustained we want to share that with the mind acknowledging that that emotional toll our heart has taken explaining that to the mind and there's no right or wrong answer whatever comes up needs to come up just allow it we also want to acknowledge how the mind has been overwhelmed and has not known what to do about heart's distress we want to acknowledge the mind's overwhelm in all of this as well if there's a conflict that's coming up your heart wants one thing but your mind wants something different one's maybe our protector part and one's the part that that we that our desires lie if this is coming up for you if you're feeling this that there's these two opposing ones desires this conflict is is very normal the heart and the mind are usually at odds with each other but we want to get to the root of it so can you identify what this bind is this bind between the heart and mind try to name it what are they going against what is the bind allow the heart and the mind to turn in turn to express their their perspective of the bind without judgment if this is hard to do i'll invite you to think well what makes this difficult what makes it difficult to see where that disconnect is where that bind or conflict is between the heart and the mind do they criticize or minimize each other for having needs if you start to feel emotional does your does your mind tell your heart to to to stop or being too sensitive or we need to protect ourself what are what are some of these binding messages invite your heart and your mind to reflect compassionately on each other's point so they can feel fully heard and understood by your mind and your heart we want you to be curious about these emotions what the heart wants what the mind wants and where can we find harmony where can some of these protective walls be let down where there could be a win-win between them both and we want to as we said have compassion for the hurts or deficits that your heart has endured but what does the heart need to heal what is the heart one what will break free from these protective barriers as we practice this meditation and just take another minute or two to sit with this dialogue and to really try to reflect compassionately on our heart and our these binds where we can find some common ground the other exercises that we did will also help to bring out into the world as we leave here to help contribute to this opening this flowing back and forth dialogue between the heart and the mind posturing coming out position shaking yes and no opening that space the breath all of these things will also contribute as we practice them make a habit out of them to connect us to our heart center connecting the heart and the mind to be in harmony that's the goal harmony when you start to spend a few minutes each day with this but just noticing and sitting with you'll begin to get glimpses of your heart be able to hear and listen these glimpses might be fleeting you will find though with these glimpses the life outside of this meditation start to change the constriction will start to loosen around that heart center start to release and let go of the fear and the tightness the bracing by the truth letting the flow of love wash over you vision the flow washing over you as you hear these words as we get ready to close the session as you hear these words notice where you feel them in your body you are you are safe and your needs are you are loved you are safe and your needs are important the desires of your heart are important just letting the flow of love wash over you and hearing those words flow in