Healing Abortion Regret

Trigger Warning: This practice includes/refers to sensitive/triggering topic/s. Please proceed with caution.

This is a nearly half-hour meditation journey to help you heal any regret you may have about an abortion or abortions. It is a judgment-free space where the focus is on self-forgiveness and self-understanding. Sending many blessings to you!

The music included in the track is from David Fesliyan Studios.

Transcript

Hello and welcome to this guided meditation journey on healing regret from an abortion or abortions.

So before I start this journey I just want to establish that this is an absolutely judgment-free space.

It's a space where our intention is to understand ourselves and love ourselves through whatever decisions we have made in the past.

So if you have had an abortion or abortions and you would like to really dive into this opportunity to heal,

I invite you to find a picture of yourself as a small child or a baby and place that in front of yourself.

Maybe a physical picture or a digital picture as we go through this meditation.

So press pause now if you need some time to find that image of yourself and put that picture in front of you either in physical form or digital form.

We are going to focus during this journey on you as your inner child as well as connecting with you at the moment when you made the decision to have an abortion.

But before we get to that moment we're going to connect in and focus on yourself as a small innocent child.

Feel your heartbeat recognizing the preciousness of the human life which is you in this moment.

Precious unique human being which is you.

This human being will never come again to the earth.

This human being which is you has unique beautiful gifts to give during her lifetime from which many beings will be able to benefit.

Now staying with the you as you are today can take your hands off your heart,

Place them in your lap or you can leave them on your heart.

Let's take some deep breaths together.

Inhaling,

Let's hold the breath for one,

Two,

Three.

So staying with the you today I invite you to think about the gifts that you have been given that perhaps you always have known that you have these gifts or these talents these skills.

Just think about what they are.

What are your gifts?

Think about how you would describe your gifts if you are for example a very good accountant.

You're very good with numbers.

Your gift might be I provide clarity to people through beautifully balanced well presented accounts.

This gives people a sense of peace of mind,

A sense of being able to feel they are in control of their financial life because they have a very clear big picture of what is going on.

You bring serenity and clarity and peace to others through your talents and gifts with numbers.

Perhaps your skill is something along the lines of an ability to hold safe emotional space for others.

So whether you are holding that space for your friends,

For your family members or whether you're a facilitator of some form,

You have an ability to make people feel safe together.

Feel safe to be vulnerable,

Know that they're not going to be attacked or judged or criticized harshly.

That's your gift.

What a beautiful,

Powerful,

Necessary gift that is.

See if you can bring to mind anybody who has really benefited from receiving that gift from you in the past week or months.

Perhaps your gift is an artistic gift thanks to your ability to express your strong deep emotions in words or music or painting.

You are able to provide a cathartic experience to others,

Helping them to express and to connect with their own deep feelings.

If this is you,

Bring to mind anybody whose lives have benefited from you giving of this artistic gift over the past weeks or months.

So just connecting in with your gifts,

Whatever they are,

And recognizing their value and seeing if you are able to bring to mind some instances over the past week or the past month where you recognize somebody has been really impacted by the giving of your gift.

Bring that to mind and feel the acknowledgement or the love or the gratitude that you received from that person or those people through the giving of your gift.

Remember what it looked like in their eyes when you shared your gift.

Remember what lit up in them.

Remember how thankful or grateful they looked,

How happy they looked,

How relieved they looked when you shared your gift.

Recognize that you may have made a big impact in their lives on that day.

You may have solved a problem for them.

You may have given them a very valuable insight or perspective on a vexing problem in their lives.

You may have opened their minds to a different way of thinking or being in the world which is now giving them a greater level of peace,

Self-love,

Understanding in a world.

They might be flowing in the world in a totally different way today thanks to your contribution to their life.

So just bringing this to mind and really drinking in that impact,

The effect of your gift.

Recognizing and valuing your gifts and your contribution to humanity.

So now we're going to continue this journey and bring in your inner child.

So bring that picture of your inner child.

It might even just be a mental picture but if it's a physical picture or a digital picture even better.

So bring that in front of mind,

In front of your eyes and really focus on that child.

Remember what it was like to be that child.

Remember all the joy that you had as a child in discovering the world.

Remember all the excitement that you had.

Remember the beauty of that child who all they wanted was to feel safe,

To feel happy,

To feel connected,

To feel loved,

To feel like there was a space in the world for them,

To feel like they mattered,

That someone was there listening to them,

Loving them,

Being there for them,

Caring for them.

Just connecting with that beautiful,

Innocent inner child which was you and which still is you.

That inner child still has a place inside of you.

Now that you're an adult it's you who is the parent to this inner child.

It's you who has to stay connected with this inner child and it's you who has to take care of this inner child.

Now I would like you to remember what the desires were of this child for their adult life.

What excited this child about the world?

What did they want to do?

Where did they want to go?

Who did they want to meet?

Remember all the beautiful desires of this sweet young child.

What were they?

And how many of these desires of this young child have you acted on?

How many of those desires have you fulfilled for that beautiful child?

Feel gratitude arising for yourself,

For acting on the desires of your inner child,

For making their dreams come true,

For following your heart which is their heart.

Connecting with that inner child and with the joy that child feels thanks to you making their dreams come true.

And sure you may have many more dreams to make come true for that little child but I'm sure that you have already made many of their dreams come true.

Feel that gratitude,

That love for fulfilling the dreams of that beautiful child,

Making that child happy.

And now I would like to bring the focus on to you at the time in your life where you chose to have an abortion.

You might have chosen to have more than one abortion.

Bring that self to mind now when you made that decision or those decisions.

Remember the messages that you might have received from your society about having children,

About being a perhaps a single parent,

About being a very young parent.

So just recognizing that you were not alone in that decision.

You had many other forces there present.

The opinions of others,

The opinion of your society,

All of these external factors.

And just bringing to mind also the fear you may have felt.

Bringing to mind any other emotions which might have been present.

Shame,

Shame or guilt,

Sadness.

Just bring it to mind those emotions.

Maybe even anger for this unplanned pregnancy.

Bringing all these emotions to mind,

Remembering this very difficult moment for you.

As you bring all these feelings back into your consciousness,

Remembering also why you made the decision that you did.

It may have been because you wanted to protect that unborn child from an environment which you felt was not the right one to raise a child in.

You may have wanted to protect them from growing up with a single mother.

So even though perhaps today with the benefit of hindsight you may regret this decision or these decisions to abort your baby.

At the time you did the best that you could with the information and understanding you had at that time.

Even if you are not a mother as a result of these decisions,

You are still a mother to that beautiful inner child,

That beautiful baby girl who was once you.

She now depends on you for her love.

She depends on you for her support.

She depends on you for providing a safe emotional space for her.

She depends on you for not being judgmental towards her.

She depends on you for understanding her.

She depends on you for loving and supporting her.

Can you do that for her?

Are you available for her?

If so,

Forgiving yourself is the most natural choice to make.

It's the only choice that we can make today.

We must forgive ourselves in order to remain a loving and an understanding parent to our own beautiful inner child.

Even if you recognize now that you could have been an amazing mother,

That you would have been an amazing mother,

That inner child still had those very deep,

Deep fears at that time which propelled you to make the decision that you made.

So I invite you to put your hands back on your heart.

Remember everything that you were feeling at that time,

All the opinions of your society,

All of your fears,

All of your emotions,

All of the unhealed wounds that may have been present in you at that moment.

You are a human being.

You are not a perfect being.

You deserve forgiveness from yourself.

Giving yourself this full,

Unconditional forgiveness,

If that feels right for you,

Will clear the road ahead for more love in your life.

Will clear the road ahead for you being able to more fully give your gifts to others,

So that others can benefit from your unique and beautiful life.

Will also clear the road ahead for any future children,

If you are desiring of them.

The gift that you can give them is your full forgiveness of yourself for past decisions that you may regret.

We can feel our sadness and we can also fully forgive ourselves at the same time.

We can also recognize the gifts in this experience.

We can recognize the gift of compassion.

Our compassion is definitely going to be expanded,

Thanks to going through this difficult experience.

Our ability to love others in all of their imperfections is going to be expanded.

Our ability to forgive others,

Even if they may not be able to forgive themselves,

Is also going to be expanded,

Thanks to this experience.

And if we finally can recognize that life is not about perfection,

It's not about doing the right thing all the time,

It's not about never making any mistakes.

Life is about the journey,

Unfolding a constant journey of learning,

Growing,

Loving,

Understanding ourself and others.

This is what we are here for.

So I invite you to bring your hands to your heart center,

Rub your hands together,

Place your hands over your eyes,

Take some deep breaths.

Inhaling,

Exhaling,

Inhaling,

Exhaling.

And just repeating this after me.

I forgive myself.

I deserve my own love.

My inner child deserves my own love.

My inner child deserves my absolute care.

My inner child deserves my forgiveness.

And all those who my life can benefit also deserve that I forgive myself.

Om Shanti Om Om Shanti Om.

May peace be within your heart as you travel through this world.

Love and blessings to you.

Thank you for joining me in this meditation.