How To Stop Overthinking

In this simple straightforward podcast, Suryacitta starts with a wonderful and surprising metaphor of fishing and then goes onto show that not only fish get caught on hooks, but we get caught on them too, again and again. Listen to see what hooks he is talking about and how to free yourself.

Transcript

Hello there.

I want to share a few thoughts about thoughts,

About overthinking.

But first of all I want to share a metaphor with you.

It's quite a graphic metaphor but it's intentional because I want you to remember it.

We've all been fishing or seen somebody fishing.

We know what fishing is about anyway,

At least.

The person gets the worms,

Throws them into the water and puts the worm on the hook.

And that goes in the water.

The fish comes along and unfortunately for the fish,

Eventually bites into the worm on the hook.

The hook sticks into the roof of the mouth.

Now the fish tries to release itself.

It can't.

It flaps around.

The hook just goes deeper.

Then the person fishing reels the fish in.

Now the fish is taken out of its natural environment,

Which is the water.

Now it can't breathe.

So we could say it starts to panic.

What happens to the hook?

It goes deeper still.

Thoughts are like hooks.

They come along,

As it were,

And we hook into them.

Because these thoughts contain a story.

We're almost mesmerised by the story.

And I say a lot of these stories are sort of loops,

Which is repeating the same story.

Which we torture ourselves with our overthinking with these loops.

Now these thoughts come along,

We hook into them and at some point these thoughts take us out of our natural environment,

Which is the present moment.

We could say they take us out of the body.

But I prefer the present moment because it includes everything.

Just being present with life.

These thoughts take us out,

In a sense they take us out of it,

Into this thought-made world.

Into these loops about an incident we said or didn't say or that's going to happen or might happen or will never happen.

It doesn't matter.

They're just loops.

We can read in books and I could tell you the thought are not facts.

We've all heard that.

But in reality that verse makes very little difference.

Because we've got to see this for our self and our own experience.

The thought are not facts.

And that's why I'm going to share a very simple,

Direct,

Effective technique with you in a few moments.

So just as the fish panics,

We can say that the fish panics when it comes out of its natural environment.

We do the same.

When we come out of the present moment,

When we're just in the head,

Anything can happen.

And so we panic because we're ungrounded.

We are groundless.

We're just in the mental world.

If you get this,

You free yourself from this sort of thinking.

Ah,

Ah yes,

I see.

Now we apply the technique and we begin to get a taste of freedom.

So what we're going to do,

I'm going to ask you to think of a negative thought.

Something like,

I was unkind to my mum last week.

I really should be kinder.

Now there might be truth in that.

I'll say a little bit more about that in a few moments.

But we're going around,

It's going around our head.

We're going around on a loop,

On a loop,

Looping,

Looping,

Looping.

Or it might be,

I'm useless,

I'm never amount to anything.

I'm worthless.

She doesn't love me anymore.

I shouldn't have said this.

You might be going over something you said or something you want to say,

Something you should have said.

It might be self-criticism.

It might be an anxious thought.

What I'd like you to do is make it real because I'm going to ask you to think it to yourself as part of this exercise.

It might be criticism,

Criticism of somebody else,

A judgement.

And you keep going over and over and over.

So,

Pick your thought.

And I'd like you to say it to yourself for 10 seconds.

Make it real.

What do you really have in daily life?

And think it to yourself for 10 seconds.

Go ahead.

OK.

So,

Even under test conditions we can see that it's unpleasant.

There's a contraction,

Isn't there?

Now,

If that's happening unconsciously or subconsciously a lot of the day,

Imagine the effect it's having on our well-being.

OK.

So,

Right,

The technique.

What I'm going to do now is ask you to think the same thought again.

But this time you're going to say,

Quietly inside again,

Or you're going to think,

I'm having the thought dot dot dot.

So,

The same phrase but before it you say,

I'm having the thought dot dot dot.

OK.

15 seconds.

Go ahead.

OK.

Do you see the difference?

Do you see how it gives you perspective?

It gives you a sort of distance from the thought.

So,

There's you and there's the thought.

You become aware of the thought as a thought.

Oh,

It's a thought,

Not a fact.

I'm having the thought I'm useless and unworthy.

Ah,

I'm having the thought.

It's a world of difference.

There's a saying in the Zen tradition of Buddhism that the difference between heaven and hell is a hair's breadth.

And that hair's breadth is a difference in believing a thought and not believing a thought.

And that technique can help you to stop believing those thoughts.

Now,

You might think,

Well,

There might be some truth in it.

Yes,

There might be.

You might have been unkind to your mum.

But one thing is you don't have to torture yourself with it.

You already know that.

OK.

You don't need to say to yourself once to know it.

We don't need to torture ourselves.

And also,

When we hooked in and locked into that loop,

There's no perspective.

When we come out of it,

We can then look at the issue.

It might be a job you need to get or you might need to apologize to your mum.

But you can do it without all the mental torture.

It's a beautiful,

Simple technique.

Share it with your friends and family.

See,

These things are free.

These techniques we have,

They're free to each other.

Leave them away.

Share them with your friends.

So use it.

When you're in one of those loops,

Use that technique.

I'm having the thought dot dot dot.

Use it repeatedly and it starts to open something up for you.

And so my other talks on inside time,

I talk about how to unhook from just the everyday thinking,

Because even that just keeps us restless.

OK.

Thank you.

Bye bye.

Reviews

I resonate with his light-hearted and warm way to convey scientific facts. It’s a comfortable way to learn. ☺️

Thank you 🙏 this was really inspiring. Thank you for sharing this method. 🙏

Need this reminder every day! Thank you. I appreciate your gentle admonishing. I have two friends I want to share this with. Very freeing.

Delightful. Your laugh and the technique helped a great deal. Reminded me of the technique of Ramana Maharshi “Who’s thinking that thought?” Bless You. Thank You. 💖♾️❤️‍🩹

Simple, effective and wonderfully liberating! Thank you 🙏😊

Wow! I just happened upon the end of a Live session and learned so much in ten minutes. Following you for sure and THANK YOU for this gem of insight and wisdom in the short track.

thanks 🙏🙏🙏 overthinking is torture- you’ve helped me so much in this area ❤️❤️❤️🌹🌹🌹🌈🌈🌈

I will use this AND share with clients! Thank you.

Five stars? 25 stars! This is so wonderful for me. You described me perfectly! Had heard the fish metaphor but you explained it so well. I choose a mindfulness card most mornings and so often get ....Your thoughts are not facts!! Definitely listen to your wise words when needed. Thank you so much.
🙏🕊💖🌟

Excellent technique and way to become the observer of all the negative self talk I have! Much Gratitude for your help!

I really like this. I’m not having a reality. I’m having a thought about something. Good way to get the hook out of your brain.!

Why are the simplest things the hardest? Thank you

Priceless nuggets of GOLD right here!
Thank you; I have needed this self-help technique for a L O N G time. 🙏

Great short talk, insights, and technique! Also like “thoughts are not facts.” Thanks for sharing!
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Very helpful. I know the thoughts are not fact, but in hindsight, not in the moment. This simple, in the moment technique, shifted the thought. I need this for sure, as the loops can get out of hand!

Very helpful useful for self talk

Thank you 🙏

A useful strategy to step away from the story and thought-feeling loops we unconsciously create. Delightful presentation 😊

Thank you 🙏

Thank you 🙏 for helping get out of the loop! I’ll put this in practice 😁💖