The Relationship Between Compassion And Ethics

Join Venerable Sangye Khadro in a meditation connecting compassion and ethics. Buddhism defines compassion as the wish for ourselves and others not to suffer. Meanwhile, ethical conduct is refraining from causing harm. Looking at things this way, we easily see the connection between the two.

This meditation encourages us to reflect on the benefits of living according to our own ethics and principles. We can see that acting unskillfully causes problems, and with that understanding, we want to change. Join this meditation with the intention to identify practical changes you can make to live more in accordance with your values of compassion and love for others.

Transcript

So compassion is a very important part of Buddhism,

As well as most religions and spiritual traditions.

And the meaning of compassion is the wish to relieve the suffering of ourselves and others,

The wish for ourselves and others to not suffer.

So it's actually a quality we all have,

Like when we see somebody suffering,

Especially it's someone we really care about,

Or someone who's helpless,

Like a little child or animal,

It moves us.

We feel something here,

And we feel like,

I have to do something.

I have to help this person or this being to be free of their suffering.

So it's a natural quality in our minds,

But we probably need to develop it more.

We probably don't feel it all the time,

And for everyone who needs it and deserves it.

But fortunately,

There are ways we can work on that and increase our compassion so that we can feel it more towards more beings.

Even those who do harmful things,

They're the hardest ones to feel compassion for,

Because we think,

Well,

They're causing suffering to others.

They don't deserve to be happy.

They deserve to suffer.

So that's really challenging,

If you have compassion for them.

But it's not impossible.

It is possible.

It is doable.

So there are ways we can build up this feeling of compassion and feel it for more people,

More beings,

And more often.

So there's a clear connection between compassion and ethics.

I don't know about other systems of ethics,

But in Buddhism,

Ethics is basically refraining from doing what is harmful,

Refraining from actions that cause suffering and harm to others and also to ourselves.

And so it's clear that that's based on compassion,

Because if we do feel the wish for ourselves and others to not suffer,

Then naturally it makes sense that we don't do the things that do cause suffering.

But we refrain from those actions.

And instead,

We do things that bring happiness and peace and benefit.

So that's the basic idea of ethics in Buddhism.

So ethics in Buddhism is very much based on compassion and love.

And it's kind of more like common sense rather than a set of rules that have been imposed on us from outside and that we're told you have to follow these rules.

Otherwise,

You'll be punished.

So the Buddha did talk about certain types of actions that he said were harmful,

That these actions cause suffering.

And they include things like killing,

Lying,

Which is pretty easy to understand.

However,

Not everybody realizes that.

So on our own,

We don't always recognize which types of actions cause suffering and harm.

So it is helpful to have the Buddha's advice on that.

But the Buddha was very non-dogmatic.

He didn't ever say,

This is how it is,

And you have to believe it,

And you have to follow it.

Instead,

He always encouraged his listeners to think for themselves and investigate for themselves.

And only after investigating his teachings and coming to see,

Yes,

This is true,

I agree with this,

I want to follow this,

Only then should we take it on and follow it.

So that's what we're going to do in this meditation today.

We're going to do an investigation of ethics and how they relate to compassion and try to see for ourselves how important it is to really try to live our life in an ethical way,

As that makes most sense in terms of compassion and love.

We'll sit silently for 10 minutes doing meditation on our breathing to help our minds settle down,

Be more calm and focused.

And then following that,

I will lead an analytical meditation,

Meaning a reflective meditation on this theme,

This topic.

So when doing meditation,

It's important to be comfortable,

But also try to sit in a conducive position,

Which mainly means keeping your back straight,

Sitting up straight if you can.

And then if you're sitting cross-legged on the floor,

Just have your legs arranged in whatever way is comfortable for you.

If you're sitting on a chair,

Just have your two feet flat on the floor.

It's better not to cross one leg over the other if you can.

And it's important to be as relaxed as possible,

Not like that.

So try to let go of any tightness or tension in the body.

So it's important to have a positive motivation for the things that we do,

Especially spiritual things like meditation.

And the best motivation that we can have is altruism,

Caring about others and wanting to help others.

So one of the prayers we just recited was the Four Immeasurables,

Where we contemplate how wonderful it would be if everyone,

All beings,

Could be happy,

Could be free of suffering,

Could have sorrowless bliss,

Happiness that's totally free of all suffering,

And could have equanimity,

A mind free of bias,

Attachment,

And anger,

But equally concerned about every other being.

So if any of those thoughts resonates with you,

If you can feel,

Yes,

That's what I want.

I want all beings to be happy and free of suffering and so on.

And bring those words into your mind,

Into your heart.

And if you'll wish that you will learn something here today in this meditation and the other activities that we're doing today that will help you make a contribution towards that,

Towards the happiness,

The well-being,

And the freedom from suffering of all other beings,

Or as many as you feel comfortable thinking of.

So the first part of the meditation time will be silent.

If you have a practice that you know and wish to do,

You can do that during this period of time.

Otherwise,

Meditation on the breath is a very good practice to do for helping the mind be more calm and settled and focused.

So I'll just give some instructions on how to do that for those who may be new to meditation.

So you allow your breath to flow in and out in a natural way.

You don't manipulate your breathing or control your breathing.

So try to avoid doing that.

And then instead,

Just step back and let the breath flow naturally.

And then sometimes one breath might be longer.

Another breath might be shorter.

That's OK.

It isn't necessary for every breath to be the same length.

Sometimes our body just needs to breathe deeper or in a more shallow way.

So basically,

Step back and just allow the body to breathe.

And then with your mind or your attention,

Your awareness,

You pay attention to the breath coming in and going out.

And there's different ways you can do that.

Some people pay attention to the area around the nostrils.

That's like the gateway where the air or the breath is coming in and going out.

You might be able to feel a subtle sensation at that place as the air is passing in and out of the nostrils or on the upper lip.

Another place people sometimes focus is at the abdomen,

Which is moving in and out with each breath.

That's a place where you can feel the breath as it's coming in and going out.

But you can also feel free to find your own way of focusing on the breath wherever you're able to feel it most clearly,

Easily,

And can keep your attention focused at that place.

So when the Buddha gave instructions on this practice,

He didn't specify where or how to focus on the breath.

He just said,

Focus on the breath.

So that leaves us free to find our own way of doing that.

But the most important thing is to try to stay with each breath.

Try to be aware of the full duration of each inhalation and then each exhalation of each breath,

One after another.

There's usually a pause in between one breath and another and also a pause between the inhalation and exhalation.

So don't let your mind run away during those pauses.

Just keep it in that same place wherever you are watching the breath.

But inevitably,

What happens is thoughts come up,

Or we hear sounds,

Or we feel sensations in our body,

Pain or an itch somewhere.

And then our attention wanders to those other objects.

So this is normal.

Don't be surprised or shocked if it happens.

Don't be upset with yourself.

It's completely normal.

It's actually very hard to keep our mind focused on just one thing,

Like the breath,

For more than a few seconds.

So when the mind does wander away from the breath,

Just be aware that that has happened.

And as soon as you are aware of it,

Let go of that other object.

Detach your mind from that other object and bring it back to the breath.

And don't worry if you have to keep doing this again and again and again.

It's part of the process,

The learning process,

For learning how to keep our mind calm and focused.

So just keep bringing your mind back to the breath whenever it wanders away.

And do this with patience,

With kindness for yourself.

And it can also help to count.

This is optional,

But you might find it helpful to count your breaths.

One way of doing that is you say to yourself,

Breathing in,

Breathing out,

One,

Breathing in,

Breathing out,

Two,

And so on.

If you're new to meditation,

Just count up to five,

Five breaths,

And then go back to one.

If you're more experienced,

You can count up to 10 and then go back to one.

So you're just counting in rounds of either five or 10 breaths.

So let's just try that for about 10 minutes.

So now we'll move into a different kind of meditation,

What we call analytical or reflection meditation.

And I'll be asking you to contemplate certain points and then giving you time to do that.

So while doing this kind of meditation,

We still need to keep our mind focused on the topic.

And if some other thought comes up that isn't related to the meditation,

We need to put that aside and return our attention to the topic of the meditation.

So first of all,

Spend some time reflecting on the values and the principles that you hold dear and that you try to live by in your life.

So some of these you may have learned from others,

Like parents and teachers.

And others you may have come to on your own based on your experiences,

Based on your own deepest thoughts and feelings about what is right,

What feels right to you.

Let's just bring those to mind.

What do you hold as dear and important in terms of the values and principles that you want to live by?

Now,

Check how well you live by these values and principles.

Or do you ever act contrary to them?

So some examples might be acting selfishly,

Considering yourself more important than others,

Being dishonest to cover up something you did you don't want others to know about,

Being manipulative,

Trying to manipulate other people,

Get them to do what you want,

Holding on to grudges,

Anger,

Hatred,

Resentment.

Those are just some examples.

But you could also think of other things that you may have done and may still do with your body,

Your speech,

And mind that you don't feel good about,

That are not in accordance with the way you would like to be.

And if you do recognize such behaviors in yourself,

It doesn't help to get angry at yourself,

Beat yourself up,

Hate yourself,

Think you're worthless.

So try to avoid those types of reactions,

Although they may come up.

But just recognize that that isn't helpful.

And instead,

What is helpful is to have patience,

Kindness,

Compassion for yourself,

The same way you would feel towards a small child who has misbehaved.

I think if it's a child,

You probably recognize that it isn't helpful to be angry and go into punishing mode,

Scolding them,

Punishing them.

But instead,

To be kind and compassionate,

Still firm.

You need to be firm with a child and tell them what is right and not right.

But do it with a kind,

Compassionate heart.

So try to have that same attitude towards yourself.

So when we are unable to live according to our values and principles,

Unable to walk or talk,

It's basically because in our mind,

There's confusion and disturbing emotions that we don't have complete control over.

And these problems are based on ignorance,

Not knowing things as they are,

Not seeing things in a realistic way,

But being confused about things.

And according to Buddhism,

This isn't our real nature.

Our real nature is pure,

Free of such disturbing thoughts and emotions.

And it's possible to reduce them and even eliminate them completely so that we can abide always in our true,

Pure nature,

Our Buddha nature.

Buddha did this,

And he showed the way,

And we can do it,

Too.

And it's helpful to recognize faults and mistakes that we have so that we can work on those.

And one way to do that is to just recognize how if we continue behaving in those ways,

Acting in those unskillful ways,

This causes problems for others and problems for ourself.

And that's not really what we want.

What we want is to bring happiness and benefit to ourselves and others.

Just contemplate that and see if that can give you a sense of how,

Yes,

I do want to change.

And see if you can also recognize that if you can act more in accordance with your values and principles,

Live in a more ethical way,

That this will be good for others and also good for yourself.

And finally,

Based on what you've understood in the meditation,

See if you can generate the determination to work on changing those habits.

Reducing,

Eventually giving up altogether,

The habits that you have that are not helpful but harmful to yourself and others.

You might wanna think of a couple of practical ways that you can at least start working on that.

Just do a mental dedication of the positive energy of doing this meditation.

Just as we motivated at the beginning,

Wanting to help other beings as much as we can.

So mentally dedicate or share the positive energy of doing the meditation with others that it will bring peace,

Happiness,

And freedom from suffering.

And the causes of suffering to all other people,

All other beings.

Reviews

Thank you - good practical guidance