Let's begin with five minutes of just settling and focusing the mind.
You can focus on the breath,
Focus on the body,
Just settle the mind.
So now I'll turn our attention to the equanimity meditation.
Again,
This is the essential prerequisite for whatever method we use to develop bodhicitta.
And it's a practice,
Although it's a simple,
Straightforward meditation,
It's a practice that we need to do again and again and again so that we counter attachment towards friends and aversion towards enemy and really bring an equality,
An equal attitude towards all beings,
Removing all manifest forms of attachment and aversion towards people that we come in contact with or think about.
So we begin by calling to mind a stranger,
Someone very specific,
Someone who you've seen,
Maybe someone in your neighborhood or someone at work who you've seen but you don't know anything about them.
Just call them to mind,
See their face,
And notice the feelings that arise as you call this person to mind.
And then just check,
Why do I feel this way towards this person?
When did this person become a stranger for you?
At what point?
Would everyone see this person as a stranger,
Like you do?
If I had a chance to get to know this person,
To hear a bit about their life and their struggles and some of their joys,
Would I still label them a stranger?
So notice how subjective this label is,
Changeable.
Doesn't this person I label stranger want happiness and want to avoid suffering,
Just like myself and everyone else?
Given the reality or the thought of past lives,
Then hasn't this person also potentially been in a different role?
They've been my mother,
My father,
Sister,
Brother,
Friend in past lives.
And many times,
Not just once.
Is it possible that we've been very close in previous lives?
Just because I can't remember these past relationships,
Does that negate them?
Isn't someone who helped me in a past life identical to someone who is helping me in this life?
Both people have helped me.
So is it appropriate to hold others close and to help them,
But not this person,
To be indifferent towards this person?
Is that appropriate?
Is that realistic?
So what would it take to remove the indifference that we feel towards this person we identify as a stranger?
And now call to mind a friend,
Someone who you feel really comfortable with.
Imagine their face.
Notice the feelings that arise as you call this person to mind.
And then we can ask,
Why do I feel affection towards this person?
Why do I find them appealing?
What's the reason?
When did this person become a friend for you?
At what point?
Would everyone see this person as a friend like you do?
Or is it possible some people see them as a stranger or even an enemy?
We can check to see if there's any attachment involved in our attitude towards this person.
Checking to see if we're exaggerating any of the good qualities this friend has.
Are they permanent?
Are they not under the sway of karma and afflictions?
Are they inherently existent?
Is their kindness 100% reliable every day of the week?
And if we spent every day with this person,
Would we still label them a friend?
Or is it possible that we might find things we don't like about their personality?
So what would it take to remove the attachment we feel towards this person?
Could we still love them and want them to be happy without attachment?
So notice how subjective and changeable this label is.
Think of the people you called friend 5 years ago,
10 years ago,
20 years ago.
How many of them are now strangers or maybe even enemies?
So think about how this friend wants happiness and wants to avoid suffering just like me and everyone else.
But why is it that I see their happiness is more important than others I call stranger or enemy?
And given the nature of our minds and past lives,
Hasn't this person been in many other roles like my mother,
Father,
Sister,
Brother,
Friend,
And also my worst enemy at times?
Isn't that a possibility?
So check,
Is it appropriate to hold this person unequivocally closer than others to help them more than others we call strangers or enemies?
And then call to mind someone you have difficulty with,
Someone you feel uncomfortable around,
Someone who pushes your buttons.
For simplicity's sake,
Let's call them an enemy,
Although some people have difficulty with that word.
But just for simplicity's sake.
And notice the feelings that arise just by calling this person to mind.
And so check,
Why do I feel aversion or anger towards this person?
At what point did this person become an enemy for me based on what small interaction or large interaction?
And notice,
Were they a friend before or a stranger before they became an enemy?
Would everyone see this person as a difficult person,
As an enemy?
Imagine having a very heartfelt conversation with this person,
Sharing some of the difficulties of our lives,
Some of the joys.
Would we still label them an enemy,
A difficult person?
And notice how subjective,
How changeable these labels are.
And if we check,
Doesn't this person want happiness and want to avoid suffering as desperately as much as we do and everyone else?
And given past lives,
Hasn't this person also played the role of my mother,
Father,
Sister,
Brother,
Friend many times?
Just because we can't remember these past relationships doesn't negate them and their importance.
So what would it take to remove the aversion that I feel towards this person?
And really checking to see,
Is it appropriate to hold others close and to help them,
But to keep our heart closed towards this person?
Especially given our bodhicitta aspirations.
So imagine for a moment looking upon all the sentient beings we encounter with an equal mental regard,
Even-mindedness.
Seeing that no matter how we label them now,
They have all at one time been a dear friend,
At one time strangers,
At one time our worst enemy.
In this regard all beings are equal.
And so with this mind we can eliminate the strong manifest attachment,
The strong manifest aversion that accompanies our preferences.
And so having done this short examination,
Just see if there are any conclusions that you can draw about seeing others as friends,
Enemies and strangers.
And let's dedicate to merit.
Due to this merit may we soon attain the awakened state of Guru Buddha,
That we may be able to liberate all sentient beings from their suffering.
May the precious Bodhi mind not yet born arise and grow.
May that born have no decline,
But increase forevermore.
