Cultivating The Four Immeasurable Thoughts

Venerable Sangye Khadro begins by setting a motivation to help us cultivate the four immeasurable thoughts of love, compassion, joy, and equanimity. She then guides us to bring to mind individuals we wish to develop these thoughts towards, and to think of specific instances that help us to generate these vast and beneficial states of mind.

Transcript

So now let's take a few minutes to make sure that our motivation for being here and doing this meditation is as positive as possible.

So one thing that's really helpful is to remind ourselves of how much we are dependent on other people and other beings.

This is true in every aspect of our life.

The food that we eat,

The drinks that we drink,

Even water,

Clean water,

And the clothes that we wear,

The house,

Apartment that we live in,

The buildings that we work in or study in or meditate in,

All of these were made by other people,

Other beings.

We rely on others when we are sick and need medical attention or when we need to go to the dentist and have our teeth cleaned and repaired.

Also our knowledge,

All the knowledge,

Skills that we have enabling us to function in the world and get a job and support ourselves,

These also come from others,

Our teachers and the people running the educational programs,

Educational system in whatever country we live in.

So without others,

Other people doing all these things,

Our lives would be quite difficult and in fact we wouldn't even have a life because this very body that we have comes from others,

Our parents,

And so we relied on them and other caregivers in the early part of our life just to survive,

Just to continue our life up to today.

So try to get a sense of how we are completely dependent on others.

We rely on the kindness,

The help,

The care of others.

So when we contemplate this it naturally gives rise to a feeling of gratitude and appreciation and the wish to repay the kindness,

To do something in return for what we have received from them.

So there is lots of ways we can benefit others.

And one of these is by developing our own spiritual practice,

Developing our mind,

Reducing the disturbing,

Unhelpful states of mind like anger and greed and selfishness and developing the positive,

Beneficial states of mind such as love,

Compassion,

Generosity,

Wisdom and so forth.

So that is the real purpose of Dharma practice,

Learning and practicing the Dharma is to bring about this positive transformation of our mind.

And it is best if we can do this with an altruistic intention of wanting to benefit others,

Repay the kindness of others.

And if you are familiar with and comfortable with the motivation of bodhicitta,

The aspiration to become a Buddha,

Fully enlightened,

To be able to help others in the best possible way,

Then you can bring that motivation in as well.

And think that your reason for being here this morning,

Participating in this session,

Is to help others as much as you can,

Especially by creating the causes to become fully enlightened of Buddha.

So you want to familiarize your mind with the Dharma teachings and Dharma practices So for the first few minutes of this meditation session,

We'll just sit quietly in silence.

And you can do the meditation on the breath or whatever other meditation you might know to settle your mind and let go of extraneous distracting thoughts.

Those will probably arise,

But you don't have to follow them.

Just notice them and put them aside,

Let them go and come back to the breath or whatever object you are using to settle your mind.

And try to make sure you are sitting in a good position,

A conducive position for meditation and that your body is as relaxed as possible,

Not tight or tense.

So be relaxed physically and relaxed mentally,

Just letting your mind be in the present moment here and now,

Focusing on the breath or whatever other object you wish to focus on.

Bring your mind back to that object whenever it wanders away.

I believe it's a good thing we are here to practice the mountainuet and the dress.

Great.

Good.

So now we're going to move on to the next step.

So now we'll begin the meditation on the four immeasurable thoughts.

And this involves using thought and imagery.

But we still need to do the best we can to keep our mind focused on the meditation.

And if other thoughts come up that are not related to the meditation,

Think about what you're going to have for lunch,

For example,

Then put that aside and bring your mind back to the meditation topic.

So there's lots of problems in the world right now with the pandemic and economic problems,

Political problems and so on.

So these four immeasurable thoughts or attitudes are really beneficial.

They are good for ourselves.

They help our mind to stay positive and peaceful and also to have resilience and courage in dealing with difficult situations and difficult people.

And it's also good for the world.

If we and as many people as possible can familiarize our minds with these thoughts and attitudes,

Then it does have an effect on others and on the world.

The positive energy we're generating in ourselves will emanate out and affect others and they in turn will affect others and so on.

This has actually been shown by research.

An act of kindness will inspire many other acts of kindness.

It's contagious.

So the first of the four immeasurable thoughts is love or loving-kindness,

Metta and Pali.

So this is wishing happiness for ourselves and for others.

So start by just contemplating that this is what everybody wants.

It's what we ourselves want.

We want happiness and good experiences.

And in the same way everyone else,

Every person,

Every living being just wants to be happy,

To be safe,

To be comfortable,

To have their needs and wishes fulfilled,

To have good experiences.

Just see if you can understand that and accept that.

And then see if you can take this one step further and feel how wonderful it would be if everyone could have the happiness that they wish for,

Have their needs and wishes fulfilled.

So it's most important to just contemplate.

So it's most powerful and effective if we generate this thought,

This feeling,

This wish for individuals rather than just all beings,

A huge mass of beings.

So bring to mind people that you know.

It could be family members,

Friends,

People you work with,

Neighbors.

Bring one person to mind at a time.

Focus your mind on that person and wish them to be happy.

If that feeling doesn't come in your mind it's helpful to just say to yourself some words such as,

May you be happy or May you have happiness or whatever words fit your own mind best,

You can make up your own words.

Thank you.

Okay,

So then the second of the four measurable thoughts is compassion,

Karuna in Pali and Sanskrit.

Wishing oneself and others to not suffer,

To be free of suffering and its causes.

So just as this is true for ourselves,

We don't want any suffering or pain or problems,

Unwanted,

Difficult experiences,

The same is true for everyone else.

See if you can feel how nice it would be,

How wonderful it would be if everyone could be free of the problems and suffering that they wish to be free of.

And as before,

Bring to mind people you know,

One person at a time and focus your mind on them and then wish them to be free of problems and suffering.

And again it can be helpful to say words to yourselves such as,

May you be free of suffering,

May you not experience suffering,

Whatever words work best for your mind.

Thank you.

And then the third immeasurable thought is joy or empathic joy.

And this is sharing in the happiness and good fortune of others instead of being jealous or resentful.

Those states of mind are really painful and we don't have to get stuck in them.

Empathic joy on the other hand is a really peaceful,

Joyful state of mind and so much more satisfying.

So bring to mind instances where you observed another person looking happy,

Being happy,

Enjoying some success or good fortune,

Good health or whatever,

And let your mind share in their joy.

Let your mind be happy for their happiness.

And if that kind of feeling doesn't arise naturally,

Spontaneously,

You can use words such as,

I am happy that you are happy.

May your happiness continue.

Thank you.

And then the fourth immeasurable is equanimity.

So this is where we can extend these positive thoughts,

Loving-kindness,

Compassion and so on,

To everyone and not just to the people we like.

So ideally we generate our mind to feel loving-kindness and compassion for every person,

Every being,

Without exception.

And of course this is difficult to do and it takes time but if we work on it slowly it gets easier and more natural.

And one of the best ways of cultivating equanimity is to get familiar with the idea that everyone is basically just like me.

They have this deep,

Genuine wish for happiness,

For good experiences and to avoid suffering and problems and bad experiences.

So this is true for everyone including the people we find annoying and even the people doing harmful things.

Deep down they just want to be happy.

They are just trying to be happy and they are just confused,

Not knowing what is the real cause of happiness and the cause of suffering.

So again bring to mind people,

Starting with those towards whom you feel just a mild level of dislike,

Not the ones you really hate,

Start with the easier ones,

And remind yourself that this person is basically just like me and just like my family and friends.

They just want to be happy and avoid suffering.

And then with each person say to yourself words such as,

May you be happy,

May you be free of suffering,

Or use whatever words are most comfortable for your mind.

Go ahead use it properly.

And the conclusion to the meditation.

If you can generate the wish or the determination to continue familiarizing your mind with these positive qualities not just in meditation but throughout the day with the people you meet or you hear about in the news and so on.

The more we familiarize our minds with these thoughts and feelings the more they will arise naturally and spontaneously.

Reviews

As always, I hear the sunlight of the spirit

Really useful and a lovely paced meditation

Lovely discourse and meditation on the four imeasurables thankyou 🙏

Not sure that’s the best definition of equanimity - loving everyone. Perhaps it also may include seeing all situations as equally potential for our enlightenment, and seeing that we are not responsible for others’ self inflicted suffering.

Great way to start the day ☺️

Very nice to work on these qualities and share these qualities with others. May you be well and free from suffering. Thank you. ☮️💖🙏🖖🪷

Thank You.

Wonderful!

Wonderful and peaceful
Thank you

Thank you 🙏
A beautifully clear teaching.

Fantastic. You have a wonderful presence and it supported me in staying present.

~♡~ really enlightening
My mind struggled for a moment to find people that I hate, and though, I don't. But then I asked myself,really asked, and a few difficult people came to mind, so I continued the work