Grief & Loss In The Body

A personal story of grief and loss, and an opportunity to send love, joy, and gratitude to the cells of your body. I hope you enjoy this dynamic relaxation exercise and learn to build a relationship with the cells of your body.
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Transcript

Hello,

Welcome to Sophro Solis.

My name is Lani Puditti.

I'm a Sophrologist studying the mind,

Body,

Spirit,

Breath and consciousness to identify and examine human behavior.

Grief and loss are the focus of this podcast episode.

I thought I might share a really vulnerable part of myself because after all we're told that there's power in vulnerability.

It's been two and a half years since the passing of Moana.

I know that's the name of a movie,

But it's also the name of my sister.

Perhaps you're interested to know that the word Moana originated with the indigenous Maori people of New Zealand.

When they speak of the ocean,

They speak of Moana.

I'm grateful for inspired parents who named my sister Ocean or Moana,

Especially since I live near an ocean.

I haven't shared much,

If anything,

About the depth of grief that I've felt and still feel at the passing of my sister.

Moana battled cancer for eight years,

But rather than share her story,

I'll start at the end.

When I learned that she finally decided to stop the fight,

I got on the next plane and flew from New Zealand to Arizona in the United States to be with her for the final month of her life.

I was her caregiver by her side,

Administering meds and assisting with everything,

Including the final moments of her life.

In the dark hours of a February Sunday morning,

Lying quietly by her side,

My hand in hers,

I listened to her labored breathing until it was no more.

There are beautiful memories in those weeks.

They polarize in my body along with the dark shades of grief.

No two people will experience grief in the same way.

On her passing,

Moana was mourned by her husband of 38 years,

Her five children,

And I'm not really sure how many grandchildren she had at the time.

She was mourned by our brothers,

Our nieces and nephews,

Many,

Many friends,

And our 93-year-old mother,

Who,

Overcome by her grief,

Passed away just 10 days later.

More grief added to my already grieving soul.

Grief over loss is not always associated with the loss of a loved one.

There's job loss,

Fur baby loss,

Even loss of sentimental objects can cause grief.

Grief over my loss continues to show up in my mind and in my body.

Traditional Chinese medicine explains that the lungs are connected to the emotion of grief.

The lungs are part of the respiratory system,

Which brings energy from the air.

The lungs distribute this energy throughout the body,

Working with the kidneys to regulate water metabolism,

The immune system to build resistance to viruses and bacteria,

And the sweat glands to provide moisture to the skin.

I resonate with this explanation because a few months after returning to New Zealand,

I became unwell and struggled for 10 weeks with unexplainable respiratory illness.

My chest hurt.

My lungs ached.

I gasped for air.

Honestly,

It was difficult to breathe and speak at the same time.

I was continually fatigued and without energy.

Mostly I slept and whispered throughout the duration of the illness.

We can never be truly prepared for the overwhelming emotion of grief,

But we can keep the respiratory system and the lungs strong and healthy so that when grief comes we're able to tune into the body and identify when the emotion becomes too much.

You see,

It's important to allow ourselves to feel all the emotions,

Both good and bad,

And it's essential to tune into the body and recognize when the negative emotion overwhelms the systems resulting in illness.

So know your body.

Build a relationship with it.

Love it.

Send joy and gratitude to the cells,

The organs,

The muscles,

The skin,

And breathe deep for healthy lungs.

Let's do a little exercise just for that purpose.

I generally narrate my meditations in first person,

So it's as if you're speaking to yourself,

And so I'll do that here.

We'll do this exercise sitting upright in a kitchen or an office chair with the soles of the feet on the floor and your palms placed gently on your thighs.

Let's begin.

Closing my eyes to concentrate better on myself,

I become aware of my breathing as if the whole body is breathing and renewing.

I become aware of sounds far away,

Sounds near at hand,

And of sounds from my own body,

My breathing,

Or my heartbeat.

I welcome these sounds as being part of life without trying to determine what they are.

Now creating the mind-body connection as I do a quick body scan of my body,

Beginning with my head.

I become aware of my forehead,

My eyes,

And the tiny muscles around my eyes.

Becoming aware of my nose,

The air going in,

And the air coming out.

My mouth and jaw,

My chin,

My cheeks.

I become aware of my ears and all the space around my ears,

My brain,

The back of my head.

And then I become aware of the neck and throat,

My larynx that gives me voice,

My shoulders,

The back of my arms,

The back of my hands,

And my fingers.

And now I become aware of my chest area,

Heart and lungs,

The upper back,

Respiratory system,

The underside of my arms,

The palms of my hands,

All of my third system.

Then becoming aware of the area between the rib cage and the navel,

My middle back,

The internal organs,

Stomach,

Liver,

Kidneys,

Adrenals.

Now becoming aware of everything below the navel,

My lower abdomen,

Reproductive organs,

The hip and pelvic area,

The upper legs,

Knees,

Lower legs,

The ankles,

The top of my feet,

My toes,

The soles of my feet.

Now focusing on the whole of my body,

Becoming aware of the weight of my body,

The temperature of my body,

And the size of my body.

Having become fully aware of my body,

I breathe out.

I breathe in.

I hold my breath,

I raise my arms above my head,

I clasp my hands together and I tense the whole of my body,

Every bit of my body from the top of my head to the soles of my feet,

Tensing,

Tensing a bit more.

And then release,

Relax and letting go.

Bringing my hands down and placing my palms gently on my thighs.

Taking an integration pause to notice all the sense within the body,

All the physical and mental sensations that are happening in my body now.

Now vital SOPHRO energizing,

Visualizing energy coming into the body from the earth and into the feet or from the sun and into the skin.

I inhale and breathe energy into the soles of my feet,

Feeling that energy move up my legs,

Warm vital energy cleansing and nourishing the cells.

And as I breathe out,

I send love,

Joy and gratitude to those cells.

I sense the cells receiving that love and gratitude.

I inhale and I breathe this warm vital energy into my lower abdomen and lower back,

Cleansing and nourishing the cells and then breathing out,

Sending love,

Joy and gratitude to all the cells in this area of my body,

Sensing the cells of my lower back and my abdomen receiving that love and gratitude.

And then breathing this warm vital energy into my upper abdomen and middle back,

Cleansing,

Nourishing the cells,

Feeling this warm vital energy enriching all the internal organs of my digestive system and then breathing out and sending love,

Joy and gratitude to the cells.

I sense the cells of my upper abdomen and middle back receiving this love and joy.

And then I breathe this warm vital energy into my chest and upper back,

My heart,

Lungs,

My respiratory system,

Cleansing,

Nourishing.

I feel the absorption of this warm vital energy and then I breathe out,

Sending love,

Joy and gratitude to all the shapes and the cells of my chest and upper back and sensing this love being received by my cells,

Love and gratitude.

Breathing this warm vital energy into my neck and shoulders,

My larynx which gives me voice,

Cleansing,

Nourishing,

Sending love and joy and gratitude to all the cells and breathing out.

I sense the absorption of this energy as the cells receive my love and gratitude.

Now I breathe this warm vital energy into my head,

A labyrinth of energy meandering through my head,

Cleansing and nourishing the cells,

Love,

Joy,

Gratitude to the cells of my head,

All the shapes and breathing out.

I sense the cells receiving this love,

This joy and this gratitude.

And now breathing this warm vital energy into each and every cell of my body,

I visualize this energy weaving itself among all the systems of my body from the tips of my toes to the top of my head,

Cleansing,

Nourishing all the cells of my body.

And I breathe out.

I send love,

Joy and gratitude to each and every cell of my body.

I sense the warm vital energy,

All the cells receiving love,

Joy and gratitude.

Now taking an integration pause,

Taking time to notice all the physical and mental sensations that are happening in my body now.

Now coming back into the space,

Noticing the energy of the room,

The ceiling above,

The floor beneath,

The walls surrounding,

The weight,

Size and temperature of my body sitting on the chair.

Having finished the exercise and with all these feelings of well being,

I begin to move my body starting with my feet,

Stretching in a way that feels most comfortable.

When I'm ready,

I open my eyes.

You may want to record this experience in your journal so that you can refer back to it again at another time.

Thank you for joining me in this podcast and this dynamic exercise today.

I hope you continue to do this exercise often to build a relationship with your body and to recognize what it needs most.

For me,

I'll continue to think about my sister.

And at least once every day,

I'll connect with the joy and the grief and all the emotion that go along with loss.

I'll feel it in my body and I'll balance the good and the bad.

And I'll connect and enjoy the thoughts of my sister.

Sending you love,

Light and continued joy on your journey.

Reviews

Today 50 yrs ago the last time I saw my brother of 17 And still of course the love I feel everyday thus far Joy and suffering interare
Grateful 💙☮️♥️

Beautiful, healing and shared with such honest vulnerability. Thank you so much 🙏🏼

I am in Awe ❣️❣️❣️. Thank You 😌 so much ❤️ for this incredibly Healing Meditation 🙏🙏🙏💚💚💚💞💞. I am so grateful to you for what I just received ❤️❤️❤️🌈🌈🌈🙏🙏🙏🙏. May God Bless you and yours Always. 🙏🙏🙏🙏🌲🌲🌲😇🏔️🏔️🏔️🤗🤗🤗💗💗💗🌹🌹🌹🕊️🕊️🕊️🕊️🕊️🕊️🙋🙋

Lani is wisdom in motion. I appreciate Sophrology

Thank you for sharing🙏I understand. Would like to learn more about sophrology.

Thank you! I’ve been in this funk of feeling sad. This time of year has always been hard for me. This week has been very challenging and just listening to this has reminded me of all that I’m grateful for. So thank you! I think about my NZ family often love and appreciate each and everyone of you!
Love you Lani
Corbin