5 Things To Let Go For A Joyful Year! #210

Are you ready to let go of things that no longer serve you and to start 2022 with space for a new you? Listen to this episode of soul infused monday show where I'm revealing 5 things you want to let go to have a truly joyful and fulfilled year!!!

Transcript

Welcome to Soul Infused Monday.

This is the last episode of Soul Infused Monday in the year 2021.

Now I'm super excited that you're here.

And before I even dive in,

Here's what I want you to do.

Take a deep breath.

Remove any distractions.

Get a glass of water.

And you wanna take notes today.

So take notes,

Meaning have a pen and a paper,

A notebook,

Something,

Your phone,

Whatever you use.

You don't just wanna listen.

You wanna participate.

You wanna engage.

This is the last opportunity on a Monday,

Last Monday of the year to really set the tone for this rest of this week,

For the rest of the year,

And not wait for the first or the second or the new year to bring transformation or shift.

Okay?

Now,

If you're here live,

Leave me a comment,

Say hello.

Who is in the house right now?

While you are getting settled,

Meaning grab a glass of water,

But more important,

Not more important,

As important as the water is to grab something to take notes,

Okay?

So let's dive in.

Today's topic is five things,

Not 10,

But you could easily be 10.

Five things to let go for a joyful,

Meaningful,

Inspiring,

Wonderful,

Fantastic,

Fabulous,

Brilliant.

One,

Just a wonderful 2020.

Of course,

There are more than five things,

But I'm gonna give you five that I think will make a huge difference for you.

I'm sure that some of you and,

Or some of them,

You are working already,

You've let already go of some levels of it or some layers.

And so whether this one thing or one of the five resonates with you or not,

Or whether you've done some letting go of it,

Just use this opportunity to take it a step deeper.

Maybe there is a particular thing you think,

Oh yeah,

I let go of this already,

Then dig deeper.

Where can I implement that a little bit more?

How can I take this to the next level in the new year?

And be open,

Allow to receive,

Be open to learn,

Grow and listen.

And I know you're here for that and I thank you for that.

All right,

Before I share five things,

I want you to do something right now,

Because it's about you doing already something and not just listening in.

Tune in for a moment,

Grab your pen and a paper,

And just without thinking too much,

Or maybe you're very clear already,

It doesn't matter if you're super clear or you're not clear at all.

Write down,

Even if it's only one thing,

One to three things that you are aware that you wanna let go.

Three things you wanna let go.

One to three things that you wanna let go,

Going into the new year and in 2022.

Do this now.

And I'm gonna hold space for you to do that.

If for whatever reason you're maybe driving or some other reasons that you're not writing right now,

Do it in your mind.

It's not as powerful,

But do it in your mind.

Think about one to three things you wanna let go.

Write it down.

And there is also a reason why that is valuable to you.

Now that's why I want you to participate.

I want you to engage.

I want you not only listen,

I want you to be part of this.

Because the more you participate,

The more you engage,

The more you set already the energy in motion.

And when you share what you wanna let go,

It creates more energy and more intention to it.

So put it out there,

Write it down.

And we will go from there.

Okay,

So I have a few things.

Things that want to be let go of in the new year.

Overspending,

Fear and sugar,

Trauma in relation to your inner child.

Letting go of being right,

So good.

But anger and overthinking.

I love that letting go of being right.

Everybody should write this down.

Love it.

More,

All these are all wonderful.

I mean,

They are not wonderful,

But wonderful to let go.

All patterns,

Dread,

Sadness,

Yes.

The past attachment,

Being,

Doings,

Yes.

Frustration,

Worry,

Letting go.

I want to release my fear of exploring my creativity,

Yes.

Letting go of perfectionism,

Procrastination,

Overthinking,

Hoarding,

Perfection,

Ooh,

I like this.

Thank you for sharing and please keep sharing.

Also,

If you're on the replay,

If you listen on this on Insight Timer and there's no way of leaving a comment,

Send me a message,

Send me an email,

Facebook me,

Whatever it takes to do that.

Five things to let go into 2022.

They're not in a particular order.

Number one is not more important than number two,

Anything that's just in some random order that I came up with.

So the first one has not been mentioned yet.

It's a super,

Super,

Super valuable one though,

Maybe more underrated one,

One that's maybe not too much in your awareness.

So the first thing that I want to share to let go is assumptions,

Assuming.

Now I want to talk about this for a moment because it's super important and it's not something easy to do overnight necessarily.

Some of the things that I share with you,

They have an underlying driver.

There is some attachment or some triggers or some wounds from the past that you might need to do some more deeper inner work.

But for now,

Assuming.

One thing you want to let go is assuming and instead communicating more,

Asking.

What is assuming?

Assuming is that you don't really know and you make up a story in your head.

And generally,

Not always obviously,

But generally we assume the worst.

We make a story out of our own inner version of I'm not good enough or someone,

Or rejection or fear or expectations that are unrealistic.

And in general,

Most of the time,

Something happens in relationship to another person,

Could be your husband,

Wife,

Partner,

Any other family member could be at work with your boss or with your employees or with your clients.

It could be anyone and anybody,

Even children,

Neighbors,

Anyone you communicate with.

Something happens and you don't know the answer or something is missing,

Information is missing,

But you make an assumption.

Assuming things and making an assumption leads many times to real conflict and to unnecessary stress.

And usually it's not even true.

This is huge.

And I'm sharing this with you because in the last year or two,

Maybe in the last two years,

And I'm still doing this by the way,

I'm still working on this one and I love this one.

Working very consciously to not assume.

I give you an example of my personal life and then another one from someone that I just talked to.

For example,

When it comes to dating,

You are in communication,

It could not be dating,

Could be anything,

But you are in communication and you're sending messages and you don't hear back from someone.

Usually we assume the words right away,

They're not interested or I did something wrong or something against us.

Who can relate?

Raise your hand if you can relate in any way or form.

Now,

But we don't really know.

Now there's only two,

No,

That's not only,

But there are two ways to go.

You can create this story in your head and make you feel bad and tune in right,

Left and center and be obsessed about it.

You can either let it go completely or you can simply ask.

That's what I do.

My way is to ask.

I ask,

I ask and communicate.

So let go of assuming and ask so that you know what's really true.

I could say much,

Much more about this and I wanna move forward with some other tips.

You make the,

You know,

Whatever you wanna make out of this and if you need some more support,

Do some deeper work because the assuming has also to do with how you perceive yourself and what you believe about yourself and how good you feel about yourself.

Because if you assume right away something bad,

It means also there are beliefs underlying and it creates that expectation or assumption.

And sometimes it creates a loop of negativity that isn't even real.

And I wanna share a few other letting go things that people sharing here because I think that's so valuable.

So here's another thing to let go.

Attachment,

Fear of unknown outcomes.

Grief,

Wasting time and saying yes when I mean no.

Yes,

Letting go of friends that no longer serve my higher purpose.

Letting go of judgment of what is or what I think things should be.

Great.

Ask next time,

Practice this,

Practice.

And don't put yourself under pressure to having figured this out overnight.

This is a journey thing that you wanna do over time.

That's why it's great to let this go in the new year,

Practice,

Explore,

Play with it.

Okay,

That was one,

Assuming.

Second,

You've heard this many times before.

Some of you have even mentioned it and that's why we wanna bring power into this to let this go for what at least a step there,

Another layer is.

Self-judgment and putting yourself down.

No matter how long you've been on the journey,

I can bet with you that this is still an issue sometimes.

I wanna let go of another layer of this.

This is one of my things as well,

Letting go of self-judgment,

Whatever next level that means to you.

Maybe you are already very kind and loving and very respectful and there are nuances or certain areas or subtleties or with certain people or in certain situations or in certain areas,

Maybe it's your body or maybe it's your work or maybe it's your whatever it is.

Or maybe you are in a place right now where you're very self-judgmented,

You're very hard on yourself,

You judge yourself constantly,

You're putting yourself down.

So for you,

The next step is to simply start doing that less and less.

And I will give you actually a great idea or maybe not a great idea,

A tool that you can use,

A technique so to say,

That if that resonates with you,

You can use to support this.

Okay,

Let go self-judgment and putting yourself down.

Again,

This might take much more deeper work.

Take a deep breath.

Letting go of assumptions,

Letting go of self-judgment.

Third,

What you wanna let go for the new year is people pleasing.

People pleasing.

And I want to also say a little bit more about this because there's a huge difference between pleasing and caring and taking care of others.

Who are my people pleaser here?

Raise your hand,

Raise your hand.

Who are my people pleaser?

Goes along with not setting healthy boundaries,

Saying yes to things that you don't wanna say,

It's about learning how to say no in a very effective but also respectful way.

And that might need some inner work too.

Like that was one of the things that made one of the big,

That's a huge difference for me in my life,

Learning how to say no,

Setting healthy boundaries and stop people pleasing all the time.

Now there's a huge difference between pleasing and caring what I said.

It's like,

It's okay to care for others and you want to care for others.

You wanna do things for others.

You wanna say yes to certain things and you want to be responsible.

At the same time,

You wanna let go of the people pleasing,

Pleasing,

Pleasing,

Pleasing,

Okay?

Set healthy boundaries,

Communicate,

Stop people pleasing.

So we have so far assuming self-judgment and people pleasing.

Fourth on the list here is resentment.

Any type of resentment,

But especially,

I mean,

Any resentment is from the past,

But I'm not talking only like about right now,

Maybe you're resenting someone today.

I mean,

Letting go of resentment from the past.

Now this acquires or requires more deeper work because resentment is often attached to trauma and wounding.

And it's not just a mental thing.

You just don't,

It's not a mental process where you say,

Oh,

I'm gonna let go.

Because if that would be so easy,

You would have done it already.

And maybe this resonates with you,

Or maybe that doesn't because you don't feel like there's resentment.

However,

Any real problem we have or issue was within yourself.

So others often has an attachment to resentment.

So you wanna do the deeper inner work in order to clear that,

Or if you are very clear on something and there's a person you need to communicate with to release the resentment,

Then do it.

That will create a lot of free space and you do wanna release resentment from the past.

And it's resentment towards yourself and others.

Because maybe you've done something in the past that you resent,

That you blame yourself with,

That you are still punishing yourself with,

But you're judging yourself for it.

A decision maybe you made,

Or often unconsciously when we make decisions or do something when we are young,

Or even when we're children,

We don't have the concept of,

We don't have awareness or the concept that,

Oh,

It's not my fault,

Something happened and it's the best that I could do.

And we sometimes resent things,

Even though we did them in the best of our abilities back in the time,

Back in the days.

So let go of that.

Letting go of assuming assumptions,

Self-judgment,

Pleasing,

Resentment from the past.

And fifth,

And some of you mentioned this,

That's a big one for all of us,

All,

Everyone,

For you,

For me.

Take a deep breath,

Allow it to come in and to let go of perfectionism.

Now there's not only back to this,

But in general,

Perfectionism creates suffering,

Creates often isolation,

Creates low self-esteem,

Creates pressure,

Creates so many unhealthy and unwanted feelings and behaviors.

Now let go of perfectionism.

Again,

You might do some,

We'll have to do some more work around this,

Especially if you know yourself,

Hey,

I can be very perfectionistic here.

When it comes to perfectionism,

Share a few things that you can look out for.

So perfectionism is often,

It creates a lot of pressure.

So you wanna take the pressure off.

Take a breath right now and relax.

The voice of the perfectionist is not the real voice.

You wanna take time to really,

Every day,

Spend quiet or quality time with yourself so that you can listen to your inner voice,

To your soul,

To your higher voice.

If you don't take time every day to listen in to the truth and to your being,

You only will listen to the noise.

And the perfectionist can be very loud.

So take the pressure off,

Let go of that false image or illusion that is sometimes created of what or who you should be.

And the rush to get there.

It's about being in acceptance now.

Take a breath,

Being in acceptance now.

Letting go of self,

Like the perfectionism.

So much to say about that,

But the big one,

And you can set the intention.

It does not have to happen overnight.

It's about you setting the intention and being kind and caring about yourself.

And you are being kind and loving with yourself.

And you give yourself patience and you give yourself grace,

Because the truth is actually,

The more relaxed you are,

The more time you give yourself,

The more you are kind of like being in acceptance with what is.

There's no need for pressure or change in that matter for something on the outside,

Because you are already whole and perfect for deep living if it's your true self.

Recap,

And while I recap,

Tuning,

What's so far the one that resonates with you the most?

Which one is the one that you wanna tackle,

That you gonna grab by the horns and say this for 2022,

This is what I'm gonna let go?

And share with me here in the comment,

Which one of the five that I've shared so far?

Or maybe it's a different one that you wrote down before.

What's the number one thing you wanna let go in 2022?

So the five things that I shared is assuming,

Don't listen to a story,

Don't create a story,

Stop assuming and ask and communicate.

Second is self-judgment and putting yourself down.

Okay,

Done,

It's time to do that.

Oh,

I still get to share a technique with you,

I totally forgot.

People pleasing,

Resentment from the past,

Maybe therefore also some trauma from the past.

And perfectionism,

Perfectionism,

Perfectionism.

Okay,

So which one is resonating with you the most?

Or maybe it's a completely different one.

Destiny wants to let go of trauma,

Yes.

Tina wants to let go of people pleasing,

Yes,

Yes.

Say yes.

Barbara,

Assumption,

Yes.

I love it.

Debbie,

Resentment.

Ellen,

Perfectionism.

I choose to be an acceptance now,

Beautiful.

It has been a tough year for some of us,

For me,

For sure.

But I'm excited,

I am positive,

I am hopeful,

And I feel things are shifting already.

This coming year is gonna be great.

And it's gonna be great if you make it great.

With self-judgment or anything that you wanna let go,

Basically letting go also means saying no to it.

Saying no to something that is not serving you anymore.

Now I wanna give you an example on how I sometimes do it with an example of my life.

You might have to adjust it or find your own version of it.

Think of something in your life that is not an issue.

Like that doesn't trigger you.

That or it's just not part of your life.

Like I give you an example,

For me,

It's alcohol.

I don't drink alcohol.

I haven't drank alcohol in so many years.

I don't think about it,

It's not part of my life.

When people ask me if I want to drink,

It doesn't bother me.

I don't get triggered and I easily just say no.

Okay,

So you wanna have your version to it.

And there's a point in me sharing this.

So maybe for you,

It's not alcohol.

Maybe for you,

It's smoking.

Maybe for you,

It's something completely different.

But something that is a thing that if someone asks you,

You just say no.

You're good at saying no and it's not an issue.

Now,

If you don't have any example of this,

Then you might wanna do some work because you wanna be able to say no to something easily.

But here's how you do it.

And it's fun.

You can play with it.

Let it be fun.

When someone asks me,

Do you wanna drink something?

I just say no.

I don't explain,

I don't justify.

I don't make a big fuss of it.

I don't say anything more than nothing.

No,

Thank you.

And it's done.

And I recently,

I was out and a friend of mine who knows that I don't drink and he sometimes does a game with it because he waits for the day that I might say yes.

And one day I will say yes just to see his face.

But he kept asking me,

He kept,

You know,

Do you wanna drink?

And I said,

No.

And then later,

Do you wanna drink?

So he was keep doing that a few times throughout the night.

And I realized it doesn't bother me at all.

I just say no.

And then I said,

Okay,

I'm gonna use this resource so to say,

To apply to something else,

To make something else a non-issue.

For example,

Self-judgment.

How?

By imagining,

Let's say my inner critic is coming in and my inner critic,

So I get up in the morning,

I look in the mirror and,

You know,

I look maybe a little like this and,

You know,

Puffy eyes or whatever.

It doesn't even matter,

It doesn't matter.

And so my inner critic is saying something like,

Well,

My first thought is,

Ah,

Something negative wants to come out.

And I catch it right this second.

And I simply say no.

And I imagine someone is offering me alcohol.

So he's offering me a judgment.

And I say,

No.

My inner critic feels male.

So maybe your inner critic is a female voice or whatever.

Like,

So this is just my example.

So my inner critic is a very male.

So that's why I say he,

But it doesn't really matter.

So he's saying,

Basically he's offering me a judgment.

Like someone would offer alcohol to me and I just say,

No,

Thank you.

Move on,

Not an issue.

So make whatever you wanna let go,

Work towards practice,

Experiment,

And go about it as you want it to be a non-issue in your life.

Does that make sense?

Like,

Does this,

I mean,

For me,

It's like,

I find it so super powerful.

However,

In order for you to have this as a powerful technique is that you have something in your life that you can easily say no to,

That you're not triggered.

Otherwise you can use my example.

Okay,

Good.

So let me bring this to a close and give you one little bonus tip,

Not tip,

Bonus thing to let go that we all can always let go a little bit more.

So what is it?

What is it?

So the sixth and last thing for today to let go is let go of what other people think of you.

And I'm not talking about,

Of course you care about other people's opinions,

Especially if they're close to you,

But I'm talking about let go of the worry about what other people think of you.

Live your life.

Speak your truth.

Be on your own path.

And yes,

Sometimes it's scary.

And yes,

Again,

You will need to do the deeper inner work if this is an issue.

And that's great.

How fantastic is that?

It's beautiful to do the work.

Now let go of what other people think of you and do you.

Do you.

Amen to that.

All right,

So give me another two minutes or three and then we're gonna wrap this up.

Last recap,

I hope you took a lot of notes and I want to hear from you.

If you haven't left a comment yet or send me a message or something,

What's the number one thing you wanna let go going into the new year?

Write it down now.

Six things that I offer you is letting go of assumptions,

Letting go of self-judgment,

Letting go of people pleasing,

Letting go of resentment from the past and perfectionism and what other people think of you.

No more.

Now let go of perfectionism so that you don't have the pressure to do this perfect either,

Okay?

Because you're gonna keep doing these things and then you have an opportunity to love yourself,

To accept yourself,

To set boundaries and to be in acceptance in the moment and to keep practicing without pressure.

Okay,

So I'm pretty much done.

I wanna see if there's a comments that I missed or questions you have and if you're on the replay or you're listening into this in another device,

I will get back to you.

Absolutely,

Yes.

Keep doing the work,

Keep showing up,

Keep being you,

Keep loving yourself,

Being accepted with yourself.

I love you,

I appreciate you.

Thank you for being here today and I wish you a wonderful rest of this week.

Much love.