Check Your Nervous System

Dr. Gregory Jantz has written 40 books on mental health. I called him to help me sort out the trauma I was feeling after the whole Will Smith thing. He's got advice that will help us check our own emotions. And - Heather Turgeon, a family therapist tells us our kids would be more clear-headed if they were allowed to honor what their bodies need right now. Generation Sleepless is her latest book. I'm grateful for all the good advice this week! Thank you for listening.

Transcript

This is Shine On,

The health and happiness show with new episodes every week on how to live well.

Shine On is heard all over the world as a podcast,

But it's heard first on the radio in New York's Hudson Valley.

Hi,

It's Casey.

Thank you so much for tuning in to Shine On.

Let's just take one big breath together.

Okay,

Settling in as we start our talk today about about all the things.

Let's talk about all the things and all the anxiety and all the high high energy that's floating around in the air.

I was totally flipped out by Will Smith at the Oscars.

Now,

I'm not going to go into that whole thing a lot,

Just a little.

It flipped me out.

It made me so sad.

It made me so so sad.

You know,

I can understand all the different parts of it.

I really can.

I can understand all the parts of it.

But I think where it took me,

It took me to this place.

It took me to this.

We've all slapped Chris Rock at the Oscars.

And if you haven't,

Good for you.

But many of us have slapped Chris Rock at the Oscars.

Many of us have lost control of our emotions,

Ruined a beautiful moment,

Cast a shadow over something that should have been such a celebration.

Right?

It's happened.

If it hasn't happened directly to you,

Meaning if you haven't been the perpetrator,

You've probably been involved in one of these incidents where it's like,

Oh,

That holiday or that special occasion,

That wedding,

Whatever,

You know,

And so and so just couldn't keep it together.

That's where it took me.

So I have so much compassion for all of it and so much sadness.

And I read the most interesting story about Chris Rock.

He was talking on a podcast about he used to let people walk all over him,

That he used to be like super,

Super Mr.

Nice guy because he was afraid of his anger because of an incident when he was in grade school and he was being bullied.

And he went on the attack and his own anger frightened him.

So he became the guy that hid his anger away.

Hmm.

Right.

Interesting.

But didn't he do a great job of keeping it together after being assaulted with millions of people watching live something we've mentioned many,

Many times on the show is that here we are two years into the pandemic and not everybody's their best self.

But boy,

With this little show,

We're trying to give people encouragement to make healthy changes so we can handle the day to day so we can come face to face with a trigger and not explode.

We can respond instead of react.

That's always the plan.

Some days it's easier than others.

So I reached out to Dr.

Gregory Jance J.

A.

N.

T.

Z.

P.

H.

D.

He's been on the show.

He's written nearly 40 books,

One of them being the anxiety reset.

Help us.

Dr.

Jance.

What is going on in the world?

Oh my goodness.

Well,

Chronic anxiety and stress over the last two plus years.

Many folks have reached a saturation point.

I mean,

They are worn out and emotionally everybody is hypersensitive.

I mean,

There's a lot of very critical,

Easily triggered individuals out there and we all can fall into that.

But one of the things that happened is,

You know,

We developed this low impulse control and we end up doing behaviors that we later regret.

Yeah.

What do you mean low impulse control?

Like,

Like we think the thing and then don't have the strength not to do it.

Well,

And this is what happens when there's so much anxiety,

Stress,

Depression.

Over time,

That chronic condition,

We begin to,

You know,

We've got this prefrontal cortex.

If you touch your forehead,

That's where we make all of our good decisions.

That's what part controls our impulses.

Well,

If you're stressed out and you're full of anxiety,

You bypass that part of the brain.

I call it low impulse control because suddenly you're acting out and doing things that you wouldn't normally do.

And I think that's part of what happened.

And we see it every day.

We see it in people driving.

We see it in smaller ways.

That was just a big display of what's happened to us.

Yeah.

And you know what?

Speaking,

You said you're writing a book on trauma.

I found it traumatic to watch.

Like I feel like it hurt my heart and ruin the evening for so many people.

Gosh.

So,

You know,

I think we all need a little therapy after that show.

But how can how why do some people?

Okay.

So so so Will Smith lashed out and yeah and Chris Rock kept it together.

Like,

What's the difference there?

Yeah,

Because we could have actually had a pretty good fight on stage,

Right?

Right.

And one one did keep it together and we do have that choice.

And I do believe we have that ability.

You know,

We're living right now in a hypersensitive.

Everybody's hyper vigilant.

There's a lot of what I'll call anticipatory anxiety.

We're just waiting for the next bad thing every day because there's been there's been so much of it.

And so we look at how do we maintain our well-being?

How do we maintain our self-control?

And I think our self-care we need to look at.

Okay.

Am I doing anything self-destructive such as alcohol cells are an all-time high.

Amazing.

During the during the pandemic,

You know,

In the state that I live in,

You know,

We had essential was alcohol and cannabis.

Are you kidding me?

That's on our essential list.

So people have continued in a lot of addictive behaviors and anytime anxiety is high and anxiety disorder,

Social anxiety disorder,

These are at all time highs.

So anytime that happens,

Addiction rates go up.

So we've got to ask ourselves,

My goodness,

Am I doing anything that would lower my impulse control like alcohol?

Those are things to look at.

Do you think Will Smith there were any signs in Will Smith's day that he maybe was at the tipping point?

Is there any signs that we could look for in our day?

Oh,

What a great question because we don't want to be doing the same thing,

Right?

Right.

Yeah.

Well,

There is a few things we can look for.

Do you have on the back burner of your life right now,

Is this simmering anger?

Is there anger that's just brewing and eventually there'll be something that will trigger you and a volcano will go off.

So we need to know what's my level of anger?

Am I carrying around a lot of anger that's just brewing?

Because that could be a warning sign.

Am I carrying around a lot of anxiety where I've withdrawn from people?

The more I withdraw from people,

Ultimately,

The more anxiety I have.

But we need to look at where are these and I'm going to call these the three toxic emotions,

Anger,

Fear,

The third one's guilt and shame.

Where am I with those?

How am I managing those emotions right now in my life?

Okay,

That's a lot.

That's a lot.

Yeah.

We might need to read a book or sit down and talk to someone about our anger,

Fear and guilt and shame.

Because there's a lot of it right now.

And my girlfriend said to me,

My girlfriend Patty said,

She feels these tense times and what you called anticipatory,

What was that anticipatory stress?

Anxiety.

I'm anticipating the next bad thing.

Right,

Right,

Right.

And this is the age of anxiety.

She feels we're all being called to really amp up our self-care and be our best and not be a victim to this,

You know,

Losing our prefrontal cortex and going back to the reptilian brain.

Well,

Your friend is so right.

Oh my goodness.

She is so right because this is of all times.

We got to look at our sleep.

You know,

We're kind of in a sleep epidemic.

The sleep disorders are at an all time high.

I used to work in sleep research.

So what am I doing with my sleep?

And for some,

The word exercise may not sound fun,

But how am I doing with my physical self-care?

I think we even have to look at nutrition.

You know,

I'm here at the Center of Place of Hope and we're a whole person.

We actually have dietitians on staff that help our clients and we do natural health care because we've got to take care of our bodies.

There's a direct correlation between that and our mental health.

Beautiful.

Tell me about where you work.

Well,

I founded 38 years ago a place outside of the Seattle area called The Center,

A Place of Hope.

And so 38 years ago,

My goodness,

It sounds kind of funny to say that.

It's been a while.

We're a facility where people come from all over the country to get help for anxiety,

Depression and addiction.

And these are the three biggest things that our culture and actually the World Health Organization,

They say a lot of things,

But one of the things they said was that anxiety is the number one mental health issue.

So that's the work we do.

Wow.

Do you see that ever changing or are we just going to keep ramping up this crazy anxiety ladder?

Well,

We're right now in what would be considered a mental health crisis because there are so many people seeking help and there's not the resources available.

People are we're receiving a very high number of calls from people all around the country looking for help,

You know,

Looking help in their own town.

They can't find it.

So we are in a crisis.

Now we're at the tip of the iceberg because really the next pandemic is going to be the mental health issues.

And look what we've done to our kids.

Suicide is the second leading cause of death for our 12 to 17 year olds.

What?

That's almost seems impossible.

Suicide is the second leading cause of death for 12 to 17 year olds.

Our kids have suffered greatly.

Virtual learning did not work.

On record,

We have the highest academic failure.

What?

So virtual learning didn't work.

Our kids are not doing well.

And you know,

A lot of stress for the parents.

So there's just a price to pay for how we've handled the last two and a half years.

All right,

What can we do right now today to get back on track?

Okay,

Today let's do baby steps.

Today let's go,

Okay,

How's my self-care?

What am I putting in my mouth?

You know,

People even when they're anxious,

They forget to drink their water.

Drink water.

Something simple.

Every day add something over the next 30 days.

If you're not having breakfast,

Get a protein in the morning.

Watch what's going in your mouth.

If you're using alcohol,

This may be the time to say,

No,

I'm going to step out of that pattern because we've got to rebuild our emotional well-being.

And it's done by taking those baby steps each day.

I write about it in the anxiety book,

Anxiety Reset,

Because it's time for a mental health reset.

He is Dr.

Gregory Jantz,

J-A-N-T-Z-D-R-GregoryJantz.

Com is where you can go for more information.

He has so many books that can really help and he reminds us,

Check in with your feelings.

You know,

Ask yourself on a scale of one to ten,

How likely are you to flip your lid today and then tend to yourself before it is too late.

Dr.

Gregory Jantz.

Hi,

It's Casey.

You're listening to Shana on the Health and Happiness Show.

And I appreciate you tuning in.

We are halfway through our 40-day journey.

Are you following along on A Circle of Women,

Also on Facebook and Instagram,

Instagram Casey Kacey,

EY Shine On?

I'm enjoying it so much.

Choose an intention,

Then take a journey with that intention for 40 days.

If you didn't join us at the start,

You can find all of this at Casey'sPlace.

Com.

Just go to 40-day journey and then check back in every day and get your little inspirational quote as you work with your intention.

It took me a good 19 days to actually take action on my intention.

Right?

Sometimes it's like that.

I know in yoga class sometimes it's like yoga for like 40 minutes and then you get into Shavasana for like,

I don't know,

10,

15 minutes and maybe in all of that,

You found like 25 seconds where your nervous system went,

Ah.

Most often it's more,

But sometimes you have to put in the time to get your nervous system to a place where it says,

Okay,

I can proceed this way now.

Anyway,

I'm having a ball with that.

We've got a Mother Daughter Day,

A one-day retreat,

The day before Mother's Day,

May 7th,

At the Osceoning Retreat Center,

Maryandale Retreat Center in Osceoning,

New York.

What else?

The Market on the River opens May 8th,

Mother's Day.

Free prom dresses at the Let It Shine Again Boutique in Replank.

And I get closer and closer to my restorative yoga teacher certification.

Still working on it.

Oh,

But what I can do with three blankets.

Amazing.

Speaking of blankets,

Everybody needs to go to bed and get more sleep.

Everybody,

Go to bed and get more sleep.

Get your children to bed earlier.

We have got to get sleep.

Sexy again.

Remember?

People used to say,

Oh,

I've got to go to bed.

Now everybody's just up all the dang time.

And it is not good for kids at all.

Generation Sleepless is a brilliant book written by two therapists,

Heather Turgeon and Julie Wright.

And this book is just packed,

Packed,

Packed with research and also help to get the people in your life sleeping.

It's like we're all walking around jet-lagged.

Not me.

I'm a good sleeper.

But other people,

They are not sleeping.

They are not making it a priority.

And it's making our kids depressed.

So Generation Sleepless,

Why Tweens and Teens Aren't Sleeping Enough,

And How We Can Help Them is the book.

And we're going to find out what five to ten minutes of sunlight can do.

But first,

Heather,

I remember reading decades ago,

Decades ago,

That it is really bad for high school kids to get up early in the morning.

It's bad for their physical health,

For their mental health.

High school kids should be going to school later.

That would be the healthy option.

But most places haven't figured out how to do that yet.

It's amazing.

It truly,

I mean,

You're right.

Since the 1990s,

Researchers have been clear about this fact that teenagers have a shift in their sleep clock.

So they want to go to bed later and wake up later.

And we have known it for decades.

And I mean,

People have been trying to move this forward in legislation in California.

Now we finally have a law that's going into effect in the fall that says that high schools cannot start before 830.

But it has been decades.

You're right.

And it's really there are so many other factors at this point.

Now we have even more technology.

We have academic overload.

So all of it is crunching sleep on both sides for teenagers.

Right.

Now,

Two,

Younger students can get up earlier and that's OK for them,

Right?

Yes,

There are.

There was just a study of a school,

I think in Cherry Hill,

New Jersey,

That really kind of clarified that point,

Which is that for elementary schoolers,

It's pretty reasonable for them to wake up for school and start at 8 o'clock.

You know,

I think friendly school hours would probably be considered something at 8 o'clock or later for elementary students.

But yeah,

It's flipped.

So the current state of affairs is that high schoolers tend to be the ones waking up earliest,

Going to school in the dark,

And the elementary schoolers in some cases go later,

Which is just the opposite of the way it should be.

Now,

What is it doing to these kids?

You know,

They've been calling this the age of anxiety.

Is lack of sleep with our teens and tweens,

Is that adding to how does it affect their health?

Let me say that.

Yeah,

Well,

It really does affect pretty much all aspects of our health,

Our mental and physical health.

But your point about anxiety is a really good one because when we don't sleep well,

It raises the stress hormones in our body.

And kids who don't sleep well in a chronic way are basically being put into a chronic state of anxiety.

So at a neurochemical level,

We have increased cortisol.

We have our brains become less regulated and less connected.

The emotional parts of our brain become very raw and overreactive.

So there are so many ways that lack of sleep,

You know,

Impacts your mental health.

But it's not a coincidence that as sleep has been declining over the years,

Anxiety and depression have been going up in teenagers over the years.

That's not a coincidence.

Maybe Will Smith needs more sleep.

You know,

You could say to a kid,

Go to bed and a kid maybe would go to bed.

Now I'm going back decades as well.

A kid would maybe go to bed and have a flashlight under the blankets while they read a book or a comic book.

Today,

They can go to their room and turn off the lights and be on their devices all night long,

Too.

How does that factor into the story?

That's so true.

I mean,

I think about how in high school,

My dad would say around 930,

You know,

He'd say,

You know,

Time for bed.

Okay.

And I'm sure I grumbled a little bit that I didn't have an iPhone.

I think I was,

I went to high school in the 1990s.

I was probably,

You know,

I had like a boombox and a CD and maybe my radio.

And,

You know,

It probably took a little encouraging to get me to turn it all off,

But not that much.

So I think it's really true.

And a lot of parents will say,

Well,

I,

You know,

I dealt with this and I,

You know,

I went to bed,

You know,

I went to bed late or I woke up early for school and I toughed it out.

But actually teenagers today have the deck stacked further against them for that reason that you're mentioning is it's so much harder to turn off all the technology.

And they have more pressure and competition for school.

So they are just chasing more sleep stealers,

I would say,

Than we ever did.

Packed with years of research and in-depth reporting,

The book is called Generation Sleepless.

And I think too about the children of the last couple of generations who are in cooking class and dance class and fencing class and lacrosse and the school play and,

You know,

Trying to do their homework.

I feel like we've all forgotten how fragile the human body is.

Yeah,

That's so true.

I think modern life is really disconnected from,

You know,

Just the basics of nature of sunrise and sunset.

We're supposed to be winding our bodies down as the sun goes down and,

You know,

Getting into just like more of a relaxed stress free zone.

But instead we go the opposite way.

We start,

You know,

There's just Netflix and like you said,

Late practices,

Cramming in homework.

And yeah,

We're really,

It's very antithetical to the way our bodies are supposed to be synced with nature,

Basically.

So we,

Yeah,

I think that sleep is actually pretty fragile because humans are ready to,

You know,

Humans are actually ready to stay up late because we trigger our bodies,

You know,

Stress response.

We think,

Oh my gosh,

Something must be wrong.

Let me stay up and let me figure it out.

It's kind of an evolutionary mechanism,

But technology just tricks us,

Keeps us up all night.

And yeah,

It is very fragile.

All right.

Heather,

Where would you like people to go to get more information?

And what's one thing we could do today to help our kids a little bit?

The Happy Sleeper is our website and our social media.

And then Generation Sleepless is available everywhere this week.

And as you know,

A book to pick up,

It has tons of tips in it and steps.

I think one of the most simple is to get five to ten minutes of morning sun.

And that's especially important for teenagers.

That's one of the ways that we have in the book,

Different routines that teens can have.

And morning sun presses go on the brain clock.

And it's extremely important for mental and physical health.

All right.

I'm going to text that to my nephew right now.

Five to ten minutes of sun.

Thank you so much for all the good work you're doing.

And I appreciate your time.

Thank you.

All right.

Take care.

Thank you so much.

Heather Turgeon.

She's from L.

A.

The book Generation Sleepless.

So much good advice in here.

And maybe it could help you and the young people in your life.

If you'd like a copy of the book,

Let me know.

Check in at Casey's Place dot com.

And I just followed them on Instagram,

The happy sleeper.

Followed.

You'll see Heather and Julie right there.

All righty.

I want very much to see you on the Zoom.

Our second Sunday Zoom is going to be April 10th.

And it's going to be an inspirational circle.

You're invited to bring your own piece of inspiration to share it with the group.

And then May through October,

We go back to meeting in person second Sundays at the Market on the River Inverplank.

Oh,

We have a summer summer summer retreat too.

I forgot about that.

That's in August.

And that's at the Marion Dale Retreat Center.

August 25,

26,

27.

You'll have to plan something else a little sooner.

So for a thought for the day,

I went looking for quotes about forgiveness.

Right?

That seemed right to me today.

Quotes about forgiveness.

And you will not believe what I found.

I found a quote from Will Smith.

Throughout your life,

People will make you mad,

Disrespect you and treat you bad.

Let God deal with the things they do because hate in your heart will consume you too.

Lyrics from Will Smith's Just the Two of Us.

We don't always take our own best advice.

Right?

But Will said he wanted to be a vessel of love.

And sometimes we drive our love bus right off the road.

Let's let it go and shine on.

You've been listening to Shine On,

The health and happiness show.

With new episodes every week.

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