Anapanasati 16: Revisiting Contentment

In this recording, we revisit the idea of contentment, which we cultivate early in Anapanasati contemplation, dwelling in our breath and in the moment. A portion of this recording is a reading from the recent book "Silent Illumination," by Gua Gu. His point is simply this: "The opposite of thinking, grasping, and abiding is contentment, and it’s the most important of all attitudes to cultivate in order to see our inner experiences, and outer relations, as our true nature."

Transcript

I'd like to start with a quote and my plan is to do a little reading from a book that I've been reading this week.

We had a guest speaker at the Zen Center here in Pittsburgh last week,

A fellow named Guo Gu.

He's a Chan or Zen Buddhist teacher and he's got a new book called Silent Illumination and it's a great book if you want to check it out.

I mean it's more Zen in its orientation but the whole first portion of it kind of speaks more to what we're doing.

So I thought I would just read some of that for you but I want to just start with a quote from that book.

It says,

The purpose of Buddhist practice is to cut off our habitual karma and define ourself as a newborn being.

We don't have to be bound by the past.

We can practice with this intention moment by moment.

Even though we still find ourselves drawn to our attachments,

The time we spend in meditation,

Letting go,

Is a great gift that can break the spell of enchantment that traps us in a moment of time.

Through continuous practice we can step back from reactivity and step forward to find ourself new and fresh in each moment,

Free from clinging to anger,

Resentment,

And all other unwholesome dharmas as they arise.

So here in our group we we find ourselves again in that space in between sets of contemplations in the overall structure of Anapanasati meditation.

Over the last few months we've spent much time considering the breath,

The body,

The contents of the feelings,

And the mind.

And as we have before,

When finishing one set of contemplations we pause to let what has come before settle and grow before moving on to the next thing.

Most recently we've been talking about posture in meditation,

The reflections of one another between body and mind,

Between the physical and the spiritual.

And as we sit this evening,

Just like last week,

I encourage you to consider again your own posture,

To find your own place of dignified uprightness in which to practice.

As important to our practice as posture is though,

So too is the mindfulness that we cultivate as we develop insight.

And as we get into the next set of contemplations and begin to discuss ideas such as emptiness,

No thought,

No form,

Non-abiding,

And discuss these ideas more deeply,

The quality and depth of our mindfulness become more important.

I understand,

You know,

That mindfulness comes and mindfulness goes.

I have as much difficulty in maintaining concentration as anybody sometimes.

I think surely more than most.

Still mindfulness is key even if mindfulness of a wandering mind.

And there is a gift which mindfulness brings and it's one that we've discussed many times,

That of contentment as we settle into moment by moment awareness of body and breath.

I said before that if I never went further than this contentment in meditation I would feel fortunate.

But I also know that there's more to be had,

There's more to be done.

In my Zen practice I work toward non-attached presence,

Dwelling in the moment without the thought of self.

In my practice here of Anapanasati contemplations I work to recognize the suffering afflictions which keep me bound into self-reference,

Separated from the wholesome fulfillment of open awareness.

And the more I practice both the more I understand their connection.

And yet as important as these are I see more and more just the foundational aspect of contentment,

Refined or rather redefined sense of being content.

I mean must we have something we want in order to be content?

Must we be free of something we don't want in order to be content?

I mentioned once that my teacher Teshin said about our sort of unawakened selves always wishing that we were not where we are or to be somewhere where we're not.

To not be with who we're with or to be with someone else.

And is that what it is?

Is that what's required for contentment?

For one of these to come true?

Our considerations of impermanence and especially interdependence help us to see through those perceived dualities.

Maybe contentment is something different.

Maybe contentment is found otherwise.

Much of our insight in Anapanasati comes from the recognition of difficult feelings and suffering thoughts neither attaching to them nor pushing them away,

Just compassionately being with them as they cycle through their own birth being and death.

We neither seek to gain nor hope for decrease neither dwelling in attachment nor in aversion.

And what is it that is neither of these?

In their absence from where does contentment spring and for me there lies the request of practice.

To change my attention from one of direction to one of reception,

Receptive attention.

Stretching deeply to perceive what is neither held nor released but to find what is simply there before I can do either.

So like I said I'd like to take a few minutes to read a little bit from Guo Gu's book.

The name of the book is Silent Illumination.

Then I thought we could just do a period of quiet meditation and I encourage you this week as we do as you work through contemplation of breath and body to hold yourself open to the contentment that openness and spaciousness without condition without effect and then in the quiet that we spend together if you're drawn to it as you explore your feelings and suffering thoughts of late and then we'll open it up for some conversation but I've got about five minutes of reading I'd like to do for you.

So I'm going to read a little bit of the book.

But I've got about five minutes of reading I'd like to do for you.

The only purpose of practice is to uproot our deep-seated emotional afflictions and negative habitual patterns that conceal our true awakened nature and at the same time develop our true potential.

Buddha nature our true nature is simply freedom it is not a thing if it were then it would have a before and an after it would be subject to birth and death and would be either permanent or impermanent.

Buddha nature is inconceivable we too are inconceivable this inconceivability is that right here and right now we are free.

We can't recognize Buddha nature because we are so steeped in our created world of dualities we perpetuate notions of good and evil gaining and losing success and failure victim and perpetrator all of which we've revolve around the central vantage point of me I and mine and it's precisely due to this self-referential polarization that we suffer and inflict the same suffering on others we can free ourselves in the cycle by not confusing emotional afflictions with our true nature by not confusing the furniture in the room with the spaciousness of the room itself.

When we free ourselves in this way we allow the Buddha nature of those around us to also manifest and through our understanding we can engage with all beings in such a way as to help them bring out their own wisdom and compassion and to do this at all we must engage in practice.

Buddha nature is not something we've lost it's present right here and now it's not a primordial state that we have to get back to Buddha nature exists in all of us right here right now and it's up to us to actualize it.

To be free we must know what we should be free of.

Ordinarily our minds are cluttered with the thoughts and feelings of everyday living.

Through practice we develop an awareness of the overall tone of our internal states by helping us to clear out the clutter in our minds.

Meditation exposes these hidden internal states these mental factors so that we can do something about them.

I call these mental factors underlying feeling feeling tones attitudes or moods we need to work with because they are often obstructive or negative.

They can color our experience and prevent us from seeing things as they truly are.

On the other hand if we become aware of these feeling tones and learn to cultivate the right attitude toward them then we will feel more grounded.

We need to know that these things do not define us that they do not bind us.

Once we've exposed negative feeling tones we can foster correct attitudes that resonate with our original freedom.

In order to become aware of undercurrent feeling tones we have to train ourselves to experience them.

The more immersed in our inner states we are the more experienced we become and the more we're able to navigate them and become skillful practitioners.

We have to cultivate some important attitudes in our practice.

These attitudes should be cultivated in all aspects of our lives beyond mere sitting meditation.

Cultivating correct attitudes transforms the way we carry ourselves relate to others and engage with the world.

In this way everything becomes our path life becomes practice so we can foster the necessary prerequisites to realizing silent illumination.

We can cultivate right attitudes through a fourfold process of exposing embracing transforming and letting go.

When practitioners come across the familiar buddhist teaching of non-grasping they sometimes think that they have to let go of everything that this is something they can do right away and that once they've done so everything will be fine.

The truth is we first have to see what it is that we have to let go of and what it really means to let go.

We have to expose our subtle emotional afflictions and negative habits and in exposing them we may recognize that they've been part of us for a long time that there's history behind our behaviors they may be part of our defense mechanisms and our survival skills so we have to accept them.

Only when we accept them will we be able to take responsibility for them and to work through them then we will no longer be under their influence this is letting go of them.

This letting go is actually the easiest part of the process because it happens naturally and suddenly but we must first do our preparatory work.

We cannot anticipate when these habitual tendencies will release themselves and we cannot will it to happen.

Practice is a lifetime process that brings out the best in us.

And the first attitude that we have to cultivate is the feeling of contentment.

Contentment counters and overrides our tendency to grasp and chase after things.

Contentment has the flavor of being at ease grasping nothing lacking nothing.

Contentment is being open and leisurely.

In this state we don't make anything into a big deal while at the same time we engage with the freshness of each moment.

Cultivating an attitude of contentment is engaging with and yet not grasping at causes and conditions.

There is no formulaic way to cultivate contentment or non-grasping.

We need to personally explore the flavor of contentment and digest this feeling little by little becoming familiar with it in our lives.

We can't just force this attitude on ourselves and expect it to be able to plow through all our problems.

But contentment is not a mere concept.

We need to appreciate the depth of what it means to be content.

It is not just being disinterested or detached from everything.

When we're content we appreciate what we have and we're able to engage fully with whatever may arise.

There's a freshness to it.

With contentment we're able to avail ourselves openly of everything without rejecting anything.

In this process there may be pain and grief and there may be pain in the body.

But we're cultivating the ability to feel fully,

To be present to whatever arises without judgment.

And to do this we have to be in tune with the body and anchor ourselves in it.

Contentment resides in the heart and it has an associated bodily component.

The easiest way to become familiar with contentment is to physically relax in the body.

And as you explore relaxing your body during meditation,

As you become physically and emotionally familiar with it,

You will then be able to tune in to contentment.

The more familiar you are with contentment the more likely you'll be able to apply it to your daily life.

Then responding to changing conditions you will have no need to solidify your viewpoints,

Narratives,

And emotional afflictions.

If we can't recognize how we're feeling and how our feelings shape our actual experience,

How can we let go of negative mental states?

Contentment is traditionally expressed as non-grasping.

Grasping and rejecting are always based on our obsessions.

If we're captivated or repulsed by whatever comes to our mind,

We can't be repulsed by our actions.

If we're captivated or repulsed by whatever comes up in our practice,

Then it gains power over us.

Relating to our feelings and thoughts through grasping and rejecting ruins everything.

If we grasp at them,

Then we're going against their nature which is impermanent.

We suffer and probably cause everyone around us to suffer.

The opposite of thinking,

Grasping,

And abiding is contentment,

And it's the most important of all attitudes to cultivate in order to see our inner experiences and outer relations as our true nature.