Transforming Thoughts Into Presence

Whatever be the cost, however difficult it may be, whatever obstacles may stand in its way, Satsang should never be neglected. - Yoga Vasishtha. In this Satsang, Shai Tubali discusses how to transform thoughts into presence, unleashing our infinite energy.

This Satsang was given on March 2021 in Berlin, Germany.

Transcript

It is so wonderful to be together.

I'm sure that very soon the experience of sharing one space despite the physical distance will take over.

The beauty of such evening scenes is that it is completely non-local.

We are sharing the space as soon as we begin to share the same intention,

The same reflection,

The same intensity.

This type of event is called satsanga.

This is a sort of tribute to the traditional event in which a group of people turns their attention at the same time to the reality of being rather than the reality of becoming.

All day long we become.

We are in deep.

.

.

We are immersed in the experience of movement,

Movement toward something,

Toward becoming a better someone,

A stronger someone,

A happier someone.

But this someone and this movement and this constant becoming from a total perspective,

An absolute perspective,

This someone is becoming this movement is actually completely illusory.

It is just a thought,

It is just an image held in the mind.

In satsang we have the opportunity to shatter this image.

And it is not so difficult because it is just an image.

You are not really attempting to break some reality that exists outside of you.

It is just a thought,

A thought that creates the sense of time,

A thought that creates a sense of future,

Of past,

Of a person.

And from that thought there comes all the experience of suffering,

The experience of human yearning,

Human craving,

The experience of longing,

Of need,

Of incompleteness.

So in satsang we have the opportunity to watch it together,

To watch this illusion together as it dissolves into the ocean of being.

That is why to me this is a sacred event,

Sacred not in the religious sense,

Sacred in the sense that we finally are allowing ourselves to take a perspective outside of time.

And be complete in being.

So pay attention,

There are a lot of teachings that I usually give outside of satsang.

There are books,

There are courses,

There are seminars,

There are schools,

There are methods,

But here there is no teaching.

This might be a bit disorienting,

But really there is nothing to grasp here,

Nothing to hold on to.

Because satsang is really the art of being.

So please don't expect an exact guidance or instruction today or some fresh perspective on our daily life.

It is a rare opportunity to be together.

What I would like to invite us to do right now is to go through some short guided meditation that will introduce us to the entire evening.

And usually an evening comprises,

Consists of some guided meditation,

A talk and then answering questions.

And if you are watching it live,

Obviously you can ask questions and I will aim to answer as many questions as possible,

But who knows.

At this time there is no concentrated effort and therefore we will see how it goes,

How it flows.

So for this guided meditation we can close our eyes.

We can also keep our eyes open.

Usually it is easier to immerse ourselves in meditation with closed eyes,

But that is not really necessary.

So with either closed or open eyes,

Sitting with our backs straight,

Not too tight,

But slightly tight in order to remain aware and dignified.

Sitting already like a Buddha,

Not with our ordinary self-image of a limited person,

Not with our body feeling that we have this Buddha presence and therefore we can afford,

We can allow ourselves to sit with divine pride.

And as we are sitting with this sense of the Buddha presence in us,

Let us do something that we usually don't do on a daily basis.

We will turn our attention to our attention.

Usually our attention is obviously directed in certain ways.

All we do all day long is direct our attention to this object,

That object.

We turn our attention to,

Toward visible objects,

Things that seem to attract our attention,

To draw our attention.

And when we are not too occupied with external objects,

We do pretty much the same inside.

Our attention is drawn toward this thought,

That thought,

This emotion,

That emotion.

Perhaps we have our attention drawn to physical sensations,

How we are feeling.

All day long our attention is directed.

It is almost like a projector,

Like a torch that illuminates whatever it focuses on.

But what happens when we don't direct attention?

Instead we are paying attention to attention.

We are focusing on that which shines its light on objects,

Which makes meaningful through its energy.

Now it is just there,

Undirected,

Pure attention.

The energy of attention itself.

It is extremely simple to do that because attention is a very immediate thing.

It is obvious that when you look at the flower,

It is simply a moment in which you direct your attention to the flower.

And therefore it is always there.

So just let it be without any direction.

Perhaps there are thoughts around that,

It is not a problem,

Because perhaps also there is the sound of cars from the street,

Or the laughter of a child,

Or the sound of television on.

It is a matter of nature.

So you don't need to turn off thoughts.

You need to be very careful with your attention.

And as this pure attention,

What happens when you are there,

Not directing your energy to any particular object?

Now feel how perhaps this attention started as a tiny torch,

A tiny point in you.

But when it is undirected,

When it has no object,

No limit,

When it is not narrowed down,

It is not limited in any way,

What happens?

Notice that what limits the energy of attention is that it is directed.

Then it becomes focused,

It becomes narrow.

It becomes wasted.

Now when all this energy of attention becomes concentrated,

It also begins to expand.

It has no limit,

No periphery,

Not even a center.

Now feel how you can really immerse yourself in this blissful state of undirected attention.

Remember this is not an effortful state.

You are not trying to be attentive.

On the contrary,

Now attention is without a choice,

Without a focus.

So it is just pure energy.

Now even though we are now leaving the meditation behind,

The guided meditation,

Anyway remember that satsang is one long guided meditation.

Remember that while narrowing your attention,

Limiting your attention now to listen to what I say,

You don't really have to narrow it,

To focus it because what we speak here is about this exact state.

So keep it wide.

Even if you open your eyes,

You can also remain with closed eyes,

That depends on you.

So what we are going to talk about this evening is deeply related to this guided meditation.

We are going to talk about energy.

What is energy?

Perhaps this sounds like a strange question,

But actually if you consider it for a moment you will realize that many of us are looking for energy.

Many of us feel tired,

Feel depleted,

Feel like we don't have enough energy.

So the question has immediate implications because we want to know what the source of energy is and we may think that energy is in some kind of superfood,

Or some kind of physical activity,

Or lifestyle.

We keep looking for sources of energy and we keep looking for advice,

For instructions,

How to enhance our energy.

And of course all these lifestyles and diets and vitamins,

They have their very important place in terms of preserving our energy,

Enhancing our energy.

But we actually,

There is a source of infinite energy that we need to consider.

When our being comes into contact with infinite energy,

With the ocean of energy itself,

That is something completely different.

This means that we are sustained by a very different source of energy.

So I think this question has immediate implications.

Let's look into it together,

Reflect on it together and try as much as possible not just to listen to me speak,

But to fulfill the insight as we progress,

As our meditation unfolds.

So we want to understand what energy is and the first thing of course that we need to consider is the fact that the world is exploding with energy.

The world is exploding with energy.

There is so much energy propelling everything.

There is of course energy behind nature,

Energy that makes extraordinary flowers grow,

That is behind all the biological processes that makes nature flourish,

Makes our bodies move,

Makes babies come into being.

There is also the energy that is propelling,

That is moved and that also is produced by human thought,

Human ambition,

Human will,

Human drive.

It is astonishing that we walk on this earth but then we know that right now for instance,

Just lately,

A vehicle has landed on Mars.

One of several already that have landed on Mars and now this vehicle is moving in Mars taking pictures,

Revealing to us while we are here what is taking place on a very distant point in the universe.

So just try to think,

To imagine what kind of energy lies behind this ambition,

This human urge to build such vehicles,

To even think about the possibility that you can send a vehicle to take pictures,

To bring to us back videos.

So with this energy,

Endless energy that we have,

Endless energy that we humans have,

We are really moving mountains,

We are building empires and destroying them,

We are starting wars,

We are writing poetry and publishing endless books and building universities and creating civilizations,

We are building unbelievable machines,

Extraordinary technology.

So there is actually a tremendous energy behind all human activity,

Behind human culture.

So how does this energy begin?

First it begins with there is raw energy,

Right?

There is raw energy,

Tremendous energy and then it takes the form of a thought,

An idea and then this thought begins to move so many things in the world.

This idea that was born in someone's mind,

Now it begins to move everything in order to make it a reality.

And surely you have also a lot of energy behind your being,

The amount of things that you were doing in life,

Behind your wills,

Behind your wishes,

Behind your hopes,

Your tears,

Your laughter,

So much energy.

So every human being,

There is the energy of nature but there is also the energy that then becomes limited in the form of thought and the form of becoming,

Of doing,

Achieving,

Wanting.

Each one of you is a tremendous factor of energy.

Now the question is of course why don't we know that?

Why we so often feel depleted,

Unawake,

Looking for forms of energy?

This is because we are wasting all this energy on thoughts.

There is so much energy,

So much raw energy but then it becomes limited,

You see?

It becomes limited in order to achieve certain things.

It is not just thoughts,

Sometimes thoughts can be extremely creative,

They create many beautiful things,

They create vehicles on Mars.

But still thought is limited,

Still thought is a form that the energy takes,

A form that your energy takes,

Or emotion.

So thought is energy with direction,

It is directed energy,

Just like we did right now in the guided meditation.

Right?

We see all day long our attention is directed to the flower,

To a lecture,

To our phones,

To messages,

Emails,

To interaction,

To thinking about relationships.

We are putting all this energy but we are limiting it and we are wasting it all day long.

And the question is what could happen,

What would happen if all the energy that was wasted on thoughts would be preserved as pure energy or much of it?

Which means that we are,

Instead of directing our energy we are beginning to preserve it,

To hold it,

To contain it,

So that it becomes concentrated and total.

Now try this,

Don't worry about silencing thoughts,

This will not help at all.

We are not in the business of silencing thoughts because that's a waste of energy,

Do you understand?

If I try to silence thought I'm wasting the energy.

And here I say,

Now I'm not going to limit this attention,

I'm not going to have this energy take form,

Specific form,

Appear as an image,

Appear as a wish,

Appear as a search,

So I'm just sitting in this immense energy without direction.

If you observed one day how much energy is wasted on thoughts and emotions you would be amazed because thought is like a generator of endless energy,

It produces so much.

If we took all the wasted mental energy on the planet and use it for,

I don't know,

As a source of electricity or something,

This would be a sort of a nuclear energy,

Explosive,

There would be endless reservoir,

That is usually wasted on wishing and hoping and striving and fearing and needing and dissatisfaction and seeking happiness.

So this is where meditation becomes a transformation of all this energy that becomes scattered,

A transformation of this energy into pure energy.

I'm sitting in my own energy and now it is not taking form,

It is not directed,

It is not moving toward the past,

Toward the future,

Toward a certain will,

Frustration,

Desire.

Just think for a moment of how much energy is wasted on certain patterns that we have,

Certain mental or emotional obsessions.

So the energy keeps being directed all day long,

So much toward this kind of fixation,

Something that we want or some habit or some addiction.

And we keep investing this energy.

So there is a tremendous amount of energy,

Do you understand?

But we are just wasting it.

Thought is a limited form of energy,

It is wasted energy.

Of course sometimes we have creative thoughts,

Creative thoughts that are constructive,

That can do something beautiful.

That's good,

But not even that is enough because we shouldn't waste this energy on just limiting it constantly.

We need to also know it in its pure state as a raw experience and why is that?

This is because when the energy is not wasted at all,

All this energy begins to accumulate,

It begins to accumulate to return to you,

Return to your being.

At a certain point it becomes so concentrated and still it is without direction.

It is almost like as you would imagine the Big Bang,

Just before the explosion when there was just a concentrated mass of energy.

So it is explosive from within,

But it is without direction.

I'm not going to throw it away.

At that moment what happens to this energy is that it becomes,

It transforms into presence.

So the transformation of thought is presence.

What is extraordinary about presence is that it is filled with vibration,

It is so alive,

So energetic because presence is life,

Presence is life in its purity.

When there is presence you are for the first time really alive.

Until then it was,

You were perhaps living or perhaps acting in life,

But you were not in life,

You were not one with it.

So this is in fact the meaning of presence.

It is the transformation of thought into pure,

Complete,

Total being.

This is what is so amazing,

You see,

We are searching,

Searching,

Searching,

We are searching for energy,

We are searching for life.

But when we don't search,

When we don't focus,

Narrow our attention to look for forms of life,

When we don't search,

This means that the energy is not wasted and that leads to presence,

To aliveness.

So all our energy is gathered and when there is no search and the energy is explosive,

But it is without direction at a certain point it does explode,

But now it explodes in every direction.

It has become so concentrated that it is like it leads to an inner explosion.

And when this inner explosion takes place,

We are coming into contact with the energy of everything,

You see.

It is the energy behind the entire universe,

It is the energy that is the origin of energy.

It is where all energy starts from,

All the different forms of energy,

The enormous energy behind nature,

Behind the many billions of life forms that come into being and want and desire and hope and look to survive and look to expand,

And then they die,

But then there are others.

So behind that there is a tremendous engine,

Primordial,

Ancient,

But ancient without time.

So this is how meditation becomes an immersion in this infinite energy.

Now,

What is so beautiful here is that it is a completely tantric principle.

When we say tantric,

Tantric means transformation,

It means that you don't renounce energies,

You transform them.

You don't need to throw anything away.

So think of it,

All the energy that is wasted all day long on thinking,

Seeking,

Hoping,

Feeling,

Needing,

Striving and so on,

I am starting to extricate it.

I am not giving it form,

Therefore I am not wasting it anymore.

And be aware,

Notice how it is wasted on a daily basis.

Just take a look,

Oh,

Here is how I am wasting energy,

Here is this habit of energy becoming thought,

Energy becoming emotion,

Energy becoming addiction,

Energy becoming again thinking about relationship,

Energy becoming wasted on hopes and on dreams and so on and so on.

It doesn't mean that we are not going to be alive,

It just means that actually very little energy needs to be wasted on even the fullest participation in life.

So if you are even beginning to observe how you are wasting energy,

Even just observing it,

That is already the beginning of returning the energy to you.

You are realizing that you are letting it scatter,

You are.

.

.

And in that realization you are already awake,

You see,

Awake.

And then there is meditation,

And in meditation,

Every meditation we accumulate the energy.

So as we said,

This is tantric because you are not throwing away thoughts,

You are extricating energy from them,

You are bringing it back,

You are unrivalling this entangled form of energy.

So that nothing is wasted,

And you don't deny anything.

Sometimes we think in meditation that it is only about being without,

You see,

Letting go of thoughts,

Letting go of emotions and just be some kind of.

.

.

Reaching some kind of silence,

But this type of silence can be also a limited form of silence,

Because it may not be vibrant,

Alive,

Vibrating silence.

Static silence,

Silence that is dancing,

Silence that is life,

And that is the only real silence.

So it's the very same energy,

But now you are just keeping it,

You are sitting in it,

You are not directing it,

Therefore it is unlimited.

This is actually what impresses us so much with the energy field of teachers,

Or spiritual masters.

When we come into contact with such an energy field,

We need to realise that the major reason for the fact that the energy field of a spiritual master is so compelling,

So magnetic,

Is because a spiritual master is one who is no longer wasting the energy of his or her attention.

They are immersed in raw,

Pure energy that was before that,

Limited to search,

To feeling,

Becoming future,

Past.

Now they have accumulated everything,

And it is vibrating,

It is inwardly explosive,

It is concentrated.

And when the energy is not wasted in one direction,

It explodes eventually in every direction.

Static silence.

Static silence.

So this starts first with a silent,

Effortless determination.

I see,

I see the waste of energy,

I actually have endless amount of it.

Otherwise,

How could my thought generate so much,

And my feeling generates so much all day long?

There must be some energy.

So,

I am now determined,

Gently,

Effortlessly,

Not to limit it.

I pay attention to attention,

Keep it undirected,

Letting it expand without a center,

Without an end.

What happens then?