The Difference Between Psychology And Meditation

Whatever be the cost, however difficult it may be, whatever obstacles may stand in its way, Satsang should never be neglected. - Yoga Vasishtha. In this Satsang, Shai Tubali discusses the difference between psychology and meditation.

By understanding this difference, we can find a crucial key to self-realization.

Transcript

A very good evening.

I've completely gotten used to teaching online since the last few months.

So,

It is positively refreshing to meet physical existences.

And I know that,

Of course,

Most of the participants are over there and welcome.

But here there is also some very limited version of a satsang evening.

So,

Whether you are over there or over here,

It is important to emphasize that satsang,

This particular event that is already a sort of a traditional term,

Satsang is not like regular lectures.

I certainly have some lectures and seminars and teachings and theories and methods.

But in this particular evening,

It is more about sharing a certain state of being.

Turning directly through feeling and presence,

What it means to be ourselves in the deepest sense of the word.

What it means to be ourselves when we look into our innermost being.

All the social layers and the personality layers and the memory layers and our emotional,

Specific emotional stories.

So,

It's more like sharing.

I will,

Of course,

Talk.

And while talking,

There will be concepts and there will be certain ideas.

And the ideas may also clear some confusions within our mind.

But this is not the central happening.

So,

Instead of trying really hard to understand,

You can,

To a certain degree,

Sit back and allow yourself to open up.

To just tune into a certain receptive mode or in other words,

A meditative mode.

Because what we are sharing here is not different from meditation.

There can be meditation with closed eyes when we don't use our intellectual understanding.

And there can be meditation through words.

So,

Before we are going to enter today's talk,

We are going to meditate.

We are going to have some guided meditation.

And this guided meditation is going to be a sort of a version of a relatively known meditation called the Mountain Meditation.

It is originally by Jon Kabat-Zinn.

So,

What is good about the opening meditation is that it always contains the entire teaching of the evening.

Then when we start talking,

We can always refer to it and say just like in our meditation.

So,

What we are going to meditate on is the essence of the mountain.

Think for a moment of what mountain means.

This rock-like,

Proud,

Dignified figure that represents a sort of unchanging presence,

A presence that remains unaffected by time,

By changes.

And it seems that of all the natural phenomena,

Mountains represent that.

Actually,

Even when we sit for meditation in a proud way,

In a dignified way,

We resemble a bit the structure,

The form of a mountain.

And in this sense,

Mountains are what it really feels like when we sit for meditation.

So,

Shall we start?

We can close our eyes.

And during the next 15 minutes,

During this guided meditation,

We are going to not move physically,

At least as much as possible.

If you must,

Don't torture yourself.

But as much as possible,

And so it's actually not so difficult not to move for 15 minutes.

As soon as you fall in love with it,

You can do it for hours on end.

And since this may be your first time,

Sit as comfortably as possible so you know that you will not need to change your position constantly.

Sit in a way that you can trust that you are physically comfortable and that all the physical movements that will seem essential throughout the meditation will be clearly the wish of your thoughts to move rather than your body.

As you are aiming to sit motionless,

You can of course allow breathing and swallowing.

But even these two activities can be relatively diminished.

Now feel how as you are sitting motionlessly,

You can actually notice the contrast between thoughts that are jumping around your still body.

And your body which now represents your true being.

The unmoving element.

Feel how you can sit like that with a sense of dignity,

Wholeness,

Resoluteness.

And as you are sitting in this way,

Bring up before your mind's eye a mountain,

The most beautiful or impressive image of a mountain that you perhaps have actually seen or that you can imagine.

And notice this mountain in great detail,

Let it slowly come into focus and begin to notice its peak,

Its connecting points with the sky and the earth.

Notice its massiveness and also how unmoving it is.

Feel how this mountain is a very specific one,

The one that you feel the most attracted to.

And at the same time that it is the essence of mountainous.

Now feel how you are bringing closer and closer this image of the mountain.

Until the image of the mountain and your still body become one and the same.

So that you in this sitting position become the mountain,

Deeply rooted in the earth.

Your head is now the lofty peak.

Your arms are the size of the mountain.

Feel how just like the mountain you are unaffected by change,

Unaffected by emotional dramas,

How all possible change takes place around you but cannot reach your core,

Cannot change your core.

Feel how any thoughts that are coming up,

They are just like birds flying around,

Perhaps sitting on some of the trees that are emerging from your being.

No thought,

No emotion can enter this massive stillness.

Try to think for a moment how you would respond to a certain challenge in your life or this mountain like quality as the mountain that you are.

Now slowly breathe the mountain energy into the body,

Into the mind.

Feel how with every breath you are becoming a breathing mountain,

A human mountain.

So slowly and gently you can come out of the meditation.

Perhaps you immediately feel the need to move the body and perhaps you feel that you can actually continue with this physical stillness.

Whatever your choice is,

Make sure that at least the essence of the mountainous remains alive at your core.

If you would like you can slowly open your eyes.

Now slowly breathe the mountain energy into the body.

Now slowly breathe the mountain energy into the body.

So let's talk a little.

And at a certain point you are also invited to ask questions if some questions arise.

Also online participants are more than welcome to ask questions.

So slowly we will understand why we have picked this particular meditation for this evening.

What I want to explore with you today is a very important distinction between what we call,

And slowly we will explain the whole thing,

Between psychology and meditation.

Of course,

Again,

It's not a university lecture.

It's not that we are going to discuss one particular distinction that is actually crucial to self-realization,

Crucial to freedom,

Crucial to the way we work with ourselves,

We meet ourselves and get to know who we are.

So of course we are not going to talk about psychology in general.

It's not the difference between psychology and meditation.

It's more what we can call the psychological approach that we have.

Perhaps we don't know that we have it.

We don't know that we approach ourselves through a psychological approach very often,

That we think in this way,

But we use it.

We make use of it.

It has become a part of our well conditioning or a part of our toolkit.

And in this psychological approach,

I'm talking about the way I am encountering my thoughts,

Encountering my emotions.

In the psychological approach,

I'm trying to understand my thoughts and my emotions.

I try to analyze them.

For example,

Why do I have this particular thought or this particular emotion?

What is the reason?

What is the source?

Where does it come from?

If we're laughing,

We're recognizing.

We have been taught,

Conditioned again,

That every thought or emotion in us,

They have a certain origin.

If we follow them,

We find some hidden thing or some understanding about our psychological self.

Perhaps we can track down some trauma,

Traumatic memory behind a certain emotion.

Perhaps it's because this is what I learned from my relationship with my mother,

Always my mother,

My father.

Perhaps when I wake up after having a certain dream,

Then I want to analyze it to understand why I had this particular dream.

And this particular night,

What is the meaning?

What does it want to convey?

So this is the psychological approach.

The psychological approach assumes that there is meaning,

Significance,

And basically that there is something to analyze.

You see that there is something there that awaits our understanding and insight.

And some people do it almost for a living.

This is a sort of a full-time job inside themselves.

And when they speak to friends,

They analyze each other.

Why?

Why do we feel like that?

And so on and so on.

And of course,

Behind this psychological approach,

There is the hope that first of all,

If I understand it,

If I understand something,

It will either lead to some kind of a big enlightenment about myself or that it will simply go away.

Do you understand?

If I understand why I'm jealous right now or angry,

Then perhaps the anger or the jealousy will go away or at least will be under control.

So analyzing can be a form of control,

Controlling,

If I understand something.

Now,

Of course,

When it comes to this analysis,

We must be honest and admit that we are just guessing.

Right?

And perhaps to a certain degree,

We are even inventing.

You see?

Because we are assuming or we are feeling very strongly about something,

About the cause or the source.

But to a certain degree,

It is an imaginative process.

We are creating a certain explanation.

Perhaps we are satisfied with it,

Perhaps we feel that it's still not exactly that.

But we are hoping that if we are guessing right,

Then it will go away or that it will be under control or that it will lead to a certain inner enlightenment,

Understanding.

So this is obviously one problem with the psychological approach.

We are analyzing ourselves,

But it is because we are convinced that there is some truth,

Underlying truth,

Screaming to be discovered.

And as soon as we see it,

We'll understand.

And perhaps there is nothing,

Right?

We must be honest and say,

Yeah,

Perhaps,

Perhaps it's actually as shallow as a,

I don't have any good metaphor for it.

Yes,

As shallow as something very shallow.

So this is,

Of course,

One problem.

The second thing is that when I begin to analyze myself,

I create a split inside me,

Right?

There is the part that is the analyzer,

Me.

I try to understand myself,

I begin to feel distant from these thoughts and emotions.

And also because of this distance,

There is now a split,

There is also some sort of a struggle.

It's like I feel that I need to understand because these thoughts and emotions,

They are a certain problem inside me or they are a certain thing inside of me that needs to be understood.

And as long as I don't understand,

I cannot be fully free.

Something is unresolved inside me.

Something is not complete.

So in this sense,

It also keeps me in a sort of waiting for the one day in which I will finally analyze,

Understand myself.

Only when I understand,

Can I be free,

Can I be silent,

Can I feel that I've completed the project of self-understanding.

So this psychological approach assumes that we are profoundly,

That we are profound beings,

That there are deep layers inside ourselves and that we are uncovering layer after layer in there.

And so on,

There is some shining diamond deep inside,

Covered by all these.

So then also there is a deep unconscious that is behind everything.

Now this psychological approach assumes one simple thing that,

And that obviously all these thoughts and emotions are my own.

Right?

They are the thoughts and emotions that I meet inside me,

They are deeply my own,

My own problem also,

My own business,

My own story,

They are related to my personality,

My memories.

On the other hand,

We have the meditative approach.

The meditative approach,

Just remember what we did right now in the meditation.

I promise that we will say just as we did in the meditation.

The meditation,

We said,

Just identify as a mountain and as a mountain,

No thought,

Absolutely no thought or emotion can enter your being,

Right?

It's a sort of an absolute total relationship with thought and emotion.

It's completely undifferentiating.

It doesn't say this thought perhaps is interesting,

Perhaps I should analyze it,

Wait,

Let's stop doing the mountain business.

Now,

Let's understand.

No,

It says absolutely all emotions,

All thoughts are not relevant to who you are.

They say also nothing about who you are,

Right?

Because if they had meaning or content,

You had to listen to them.

But at least in this meditation,

We say they are absolutely all without differentiation,

Without exception,

They are all nonsense.

This is a very radical approach,

Right?

I mean,

Compare it to the psychological approach that gives a lot of importance to what is going on inside me,

My dreams,

My fantasies,

My desires,

My fears,

My contradictory emotions.

We listen to all that and then you come to the meditative approach and they tell you nothing.

You listen to nothing,

All thoughts are just one thought,

All emotions are just one emotion.

This doesn't mean by the way that you have to become stiff against these thoughts and emotions.

This is only if we don't understand the meditative approach.

We are thinking that we should guard ourselves against thoughts and emotions.

It's not another struggle.

No,

The meditative approach can be actually deeply soft and compassionate toward the thoughts and emotions.

Remember what we said in the meditation.

They are just like birds flying around,

Sitting on trees.

Would you resist birds if you were a mountain?

Would you think that they are scratching my skull or I can't bear them anymore?

No,

The mountain is big enough,

It has a core and then on top of it there are trees and on top of the trees there are birds.

So,

It can be completely inclusive,

It can be completely containing,

But without absolutely no identification,

No interest.

In this sense it is completely indifferent.

So,

The meditative approach is the practice of complete indifference to thoughts and emotions.

Now probably you think,

Okay,

So what am I meant to do?

Should I choose a certain approach?

Should I take the meditative path or should I take the psychological approach?

The good thing about wisdom,

The wisdom that comes from silence,

The wisdom that comes from consciousness is that it is always about a sort of a middle path.

So,

Wisdom always includes all the opposites.

But even that we don't understand what does it mean,

How can we live with these two opposites at the same time?

So,

Let's try to understand.

First of all,

There is of course the psychological level and we need to embrace at least some aspect of the psychological level.

It exists and how exactly does it exist?

It exists as what we can call life lessons or life themes.

And this is the thing,

Each one of us has something like three to four life themes.

What are life themes?

What does it mean?

It means themes,

Issues or certain basic conflicts or basic tensions that have repeated themselves since our childhood.

And really there are not millions.

When you begin to start learning yourself,

You start learning the personality and its complexity and all the layers,

You can sum it up in three to four issues.

These three to four issues,

They are constantly repeating themselves for tens of years.

If we are 30,

40,

50 years old,

We're still having these as sort of cycles and they accompanied us.

And the way we can most easily detect these life issues,

Life themes is simply by asking ourselves,

How would I complete the sentence,

Ever since I can remember myself,

I have felt three dots?

When you are beginning to use this sentence,

It helps you to find your basic relationship with the world and with yourself.

And each one of us has a sort of individual relationship with the world that also contains real blockages,

Real issues.

This is not something that we can simply meditate away,

You see?

You will meditate,

Meditate,

Meditate,

You will open your eyes and here is the life theme waiting for you.

Then you will say,

Oh,

I probably haven't meditated enough.

So you will meditate more.

Again,

Open your eyes and it's there.

It's because life themes are not a mistake.

They are not something that is meant to be dissolved and actually even after you have worked on them therapeutically and endlessly,

You will never be able to resolve them.

Never.

Not,

Never fully.

They will always be somewhat there accompanying you.

And this is actually very important because the friction that is enabled by these life themes is exactly the force that drives you,

That moves you in your further soul development.

You see?

By struggling with these issues,

You are evolving.

So this is essential and that is why there is no interest on the part of the cosmos that you will have absolutely no life themes.

And everyone has life themes.

They may,

If you have resolved them or have transformed them,

And this is the right term,

Transform,

Not resolve,

Because resolve means that something that is a problem that needs to be finalized,

You see?

The solution needs to be attained and transformed means that the material of the life theme is changing into something else.

It is building you.

It is building your true being in the world.

It is making you the authentic you in your relationship with the world.

So these life themes,

They are deeply connected to our what we call traditionally karma and dharma.

Karma,

It's all the sort of,

In this context of course,

All the issues that surround our relationship with the world,

That bind us.

And dharma is our noble action,

What we are meant to,

The way we are meant to express ourselves in the world in the most authentic way,

In the highest form of ourselves.

Now these life themes,

They require work.

But the thing about them is that they require work,

Not on a daily basis all day long.

It is not something that,

It is not really fulfilled well enough if we are constantly analyzing ourselves or looking,

Looking,

Looking,

Looking,

Looking.

Life themes,

They require a special work,

Focused work.

That's why they require often deep going therapy or special seminars or any form of focused work.

You give your heart,

You give your mind to it.

And in this way you are able to transform it.

But the thing about life themes is that they are not resolved only in focused work like this.

They often require action in the world,

You see,

Because they are connected to karma and dharma.

We need to act sometimes in certain ways in the world to express in a certain way that will develop our life themes,

You see,

That will transform them.

So that's life themes.

The thing is that as we said,

Working on them all day long is through the emotions and the thoughts that they produce in us is actually,

Is just like trying to treat a tree from the branches and the leaves,

You see.

There are many branches and many leaves.

So working one thought after another,

One emotion after another will not help.

You need to have a deep rooted approach.

You need to go to the roots of the tree.

That is why it requires focused work.

So this is what's true about psychology.

But the thing is that so many of our thoughts and emotions during the day,

They have nothing to do with these three or four life themes.

They are just endless chatter,

Mechanical,

Automatic and meaningless.

And here is where the meditative approach enters.

Because we could say that throughout the day,

When it comes to our relationship with our thoughts and emotions,

Trying to analyze them,

To understand them,

Our problem is that behind most of them there is absolutely nothing.

And actually they have no subconscious,

You see.

There is no hidden layer behind them because they are produced automatically.

This is actually what I call the thinking machine.

And I use this term in purpose because the thinking machine means that there is a machine,

You see.

The machine is something that is producing mechanically,

Mindlessly thoughts,

Emotions.

And these thoughts and emotions are essentially not even our own.

Now this is quite unbelievable,

Right?

What do you mean not our own?

We feel that they are going on inside our brain.

So first of all,

When you are really transforming,

You will no longer notice or experience thoughts taking place inside your brain,

But actually you will be more like a mountain.

You will feel that they are like birds flying around your being.

And that you could have the option of identifying with them and then the bird enters.

Do you understand?

You are creating an opening.

The bird enters.

But if you don't,

Then they are just flying around.

So you have this absolute choice all the time.

This is what the meditative approach teaches us.

And it's not just the meditative practice.

Sometimes we think that we sit for meditation.

We learn,

We experience silence and then we go on in our life,

With our life,

You see.

But the meditative approach tells us how to live our life right now.

And the first thing it tells us,

Yes,

You actually have an absolute choice.

And this choice is perhaps,

I don't know,

Maybe it's the only choice we have in life.

I don't know how many choices we have in this life.

Sometimes it seems that most major events take place outside our control,

Which the thinking machine really doesn't like.

That's why it tries to analyze,

To understand,

To control.

So if I have a choice,

This means that by the moment I choose to identify with a thought and let it enter,

I internalize it and I also personalize it.

Now it's my own thought.

Suddenly I have this is my own thought,

My own emotion.

Are you aware of this process?

It's extremely important to be aware that throughout the day we have,

Because the thinking machine produces millions of thoughts.

But we choose to focus or give power to certain thoughts,

Right?

And emotions.

And then they become my thought,

My emotion.

The meditative approach says you can release your ownership.

You don't have to possess any of them.

And when you're starting to make use of this power that you have,

Choosing not to personalize,

Not to internalize and not to personalize a thought or emotion,

You are actually,

You have found your key to freedom.

This is total freedom.

Meditative approach tells us most of the thoughts and the emotions,

There is nothing to analyze and there is nothing to look into.

There is no content because,

And this is the thing,

Because,

Because,

Because they are not personal at all.

Why are they not personal?

It's because there is nothing personal about anger,

About desire,

About fear,

About dissatisfaction.

These are basic forces that are a part of a mechanism,

A part of a machine.

This machine produces all this material throughout the day.

You know,

In Buddhism and in Judaism and other religions,

They have treated these forces so impersonally that they've started treating them as gods and demons,

You see.

Like now there is,

I don't know,

The deity or the angel of desire and that it is visiting me and so on and so on.

And there is something pretty healthy about this kind of approach.

We are now so proud that everything,

That we don't believe in gods and demons,

But then we pay the price.

Everything becomes personal.

All of these forces now they become something that they're part of our psychology,

Special psychology.

And we need to understand everything and then we need to depend on this content to be silent,

To be free,

To be complete.

Now I can tell you with certainty if you needed to understand all of your thoughts and emotions,

You could never become free.

Right?

I mean,

Imagine that.

Because why?

Because the thinking machine produces endlessly this material.

So it's never-ending by nature.

Freedom is not realized by understanding all of it,

But by realizing that I don't need to understand the whole of it,

You see.

I just don't need to understand.

Freedom is now.

Now then we think,

But my god,

What about suppression?

If I'm not paying attention to all these things that are taking place,

Am I not suppressing?

Am I overlooking something?

Now this is exactly a part of our conditioning because of the psychological approach.

We think psychologically suppressing,

You see.

I suppress something.

So if,

For example,

I have a sexual desire,

If by not personalizing it,

Am I suppressing it?

Yes,

Only if it is my sexual desire.

Do you understand?

Desire is desire.

This thing is all the time producing desires,

Fears,

Anxieties,

Wishes,

Frustrations,

Disappointments,

All day long.

And it's not yours.

It is collective.

It is something flowing through your brains.

And you have the power to either personalize it or universalize it.

Now the thing is,

Try this freedom now.

Ask yourself who would I be if I were free from the belief that I needed to treat all these thoughts and emotions as my own?

Who would I be if I understood that all these streams,

Endless streams,

Endless,

Endless,

Endless,

Is not personal?

I don't need to resolve it.

I don't need to struggle with it.

I don't need to transcend it.

I don't need to transform it.

I don't need to suppress it,

To unsuppress it.

This is the tremendous power of the meditator approach.

It shows us the way to total freedom.

And here,

Right now,

When I move beneath this stream into my innermost being,

Nothing needs to be resolved,

Nothing needs to change,

To become better,

To improve,

So there is no need for waiting to be complete.

So,

So,

Let's see if there are questions.

Either online or here.

Yes,

Please.

I would have a question,

What do you describe our relationship to action then,

Because is that personal or not,

Because I find myself really watching my patterns and not trying to follow the unhealthy patterns.

So I'm trying to take as much responsibility for my actions as I can,

And even if I make a mistake,

I try not to judge myself and let go of it.

But,

Like,

How would you say how personal is that then,

Because,

Like,

Okay,

The thoughts,

The emotions,

They're part of the thinking machine,

But my action,

Like,

Is how much in charge am I?

Or should I,

Because I also feel there is a lot of attention going to that,

Actually,

From my being.

So it's taking up a lot of the space before the thoughts and emotions took up.

But what do you mean by action?

I will repeat the question in a second.

I'm just trying to understand it.

How I,

For example,

Handle my life's things and what actions I take in life.

Well,

Do you want the truest answer?

Yes.

The truest answer is that action is none of our business.

It's the truest answer.

The truest answer is that all we need to do is to take care of the purity,

Silence and desirelessness of our being.

That's it.

Because true action is like,

Is a natural flow that comes from a state of being if we have taken care of it,

You see.

And then you don't need to even care what is going on outside.

Because that is acted spontaneously from a sort of a response of this pure being,

This pure and silent being to the situation.

That's it.

There is no,

The thing is that why do we have wrong action?

What is wrong action?

Because this is what we don't need to care about right action.

What do you mean?

You know,

People,

Of course,

In religions,

They've done all these things of right action.

And I respect that right action,

Like not saying bad things,

Not judging,

Being compassionate and so on and so on.

But what happens if your being,

You have freed yourself from the noise of the thinking machine that keeps creating desire and dissatisfaction?

If there is no desire and no dissatisfaction,

No anger and no fear,

Again,

Don't ever think that it will lead you to some perfect action on the other hand.

If this is the realm of mistakes,

Most probably you will mostly make mistakes.

I mostly make mistakes.

I do not mind.

Do you understand?

I'm not worried because I know that I mostly make mistakes.

Sometimes I make something that is probably not a mistake and I'm amazed.

How could that happen?

Sometimes,

Sometimes even I can be quite intelligent.

I'm serious.

I'm serious.

It's not a show right now.

Because I think that when we are taking humorously our own intelligence,

You see,

The limitations of what we can do and what we know,

Then we don't expect too much.

We don't know much.

Our mind is limited.

We cannot predict.

We cannot know consequences.

We cannot see the bigger picture always,

Right?

Mostly.

And therefore,

We shouldn't be so too worried.

If you think,

Anyway,

I will probably make mistakes.

That immediately relieves all the tension,

The deep tension that is related to the consequences of our actions,

You see.

Because the thinking machine,

I will not speak about it right now,

Although it's really tempting,

Why the thinking machine is here in the first place.

But what it does for a living,

What it is all about is calculation and anticipation,

You see.

So all that it does,

And that's why it is so careful and cautious and worried and anxious and fearful and desirous,

Because it always calculates.

If I do this,

Then I will get that.

If I will avoid this,

Then I will be able to get that or to avoid that.

So it always tries to control reality so anxiously.

But if we are releasing this hysterical dependency,

There is already more space.

And second is just taking care of the beauty,

The purity,

The cleanliness,

The desirelessness of who we are.

That's it.

Take care,

Krishnamurti,

My favorite teacher,

Said,

Take care of the inner and the outer will take care of itself.

What?

This sentence is everything.

Everything.

Take care of the inner,

The outer will take care of itself.

It didn't mean escape to dreamland and everything will,

There will be blessings on your head,

Showering.

It's not that.

It simply meant if you are taking care of this inner beauty,

This purity,

This cleanliness,

This silence,

You will not need to care about what is going on.

It doesn't matter actually what happens to you.

So yes,

A question from,

I've noticed,

Yes.

One is from Amir.

Amir?

Yes,

Hello.

So he says the absence of my father is maybe some of my dharma,

Is it?

The absence of my father?

The absence of my father is maybe part of my dharma,

Is it?

So I hold my mother tight and I'm searching for father figures and general harmony with people.

I try to connect them.

Do I see connection because it is my dharma or is it something to let go of?

No,

It can definitely be a life theme,

Definitely.

If you notice it,

Then that is something to go through because it can be.

Of course,

To a certain degree,

As Nietzsche said,

We all killed the father and now we are looking for our father.

In a way,

We all have this father complex.

So to a certain degree,

It's a collective complex,

You see.

We are talking about the father,

The god figure,

The one that will take care of us,

The one that we can trust,

We can surrender to.

So to a certain degree,

We've all lost our father.

So there is a collective issue about it,

But then there certainly can be this kind of theme.

What is again important to understand?

It may be your life theme,

But pay attention,

Your life theme is not you.

What I just said,

It's your life theme,

Which means it is your theme,

But it is not who you are.

It's very important not to identify with our life themes in a way that they become our identity.

It's just the life themes are like issues that are related to our expression in the world,

Our relationship with the world,

But it's still not who we are.

Who we are is that mountain,

Remember?

Who we are is that being.

So I'm just saying it may be certainly your life theme and then go through it.

Go through it because who knows what it holds within it for you.

Perhaps it wants to show you what it means to become a father yourself.

It invites you to find the one sort of father figure,

But then if it is the right father figure,

It will tell you become a father yourself.

Because that's what real fathers say,

Right?

That's what they say.

Yes,

Please.

Also with regards to those life themes,

If I understood correctly,

You said that the energetic pull can never be completely released,

There's always some pull there.

Definitely.

But still,

From the chakra perspective,

It's still possible to rise above even though you have the pull?

Oh,

Yes.

Of the lower chakras that see the pull?

It's a good question,

Yes.

The question is,

We say that with life themes,

There are somehow always here.

They accompany us.

But then you're asking if since they are energetically pulling us,

Does it not mean that we can have the freedom to go beyond them,

Right?

In terms of chakras,

To transcend them,

Otherwise it's like something that pulls you down.

This is a very good question.

Think of it,

You need to transform the life themes perhaps in 70% in order to feel no gravitational force.

That's not scientifically measured.

But what I'm saying is that at a certain point,

First of all,

They become more a major power of support in your life.

This is one thing.

They support you.

Second is that their issues are no longer a big story,

You see?

It's not something that occupies you,

That is a hindrance,

It doesn't block your action in the world anymore.

You are able to express your highest being.

But what I'm saying is that there always remains some friction,

But you don't need all the friction to be gone as long as you begin to approach this friction completely positively.

You embrace it,

You see?

Because that's a part of the life theme,

Is that a part of the transformation is saying,

I love this life theme.

Now I'm not resisting it,

It's not a burden,

It's not the cross that I need to bear.

It's the energy that carries me forward if I just listen to it.

It's the only way to reduce the pull in the first place,

Isn't it?

Exactly.

Yes,

Exactly.

Exactly.

Embrace a force,

Instead of struggling with it,

Trying to push it down,

It's already uplifting.

So what I'm saying,

The life themes are deeply related to the Kundalini power.

And actually the Kundalini force that flows through the gradually balancing chakras even guides you toward facing the specific life themes at certain times,

You see.

Because it tells you,

Okay,

Now to further flourish,

I need you to take care of this.

And this can become a daily thing for a period of time,

Can't it?

Yes,

As long as it is focused,

Which means that it is something that you are doing consciously for some time,

Not as your new identity,

Like now you are in the project of taking care of yourself,

But as in the context of now I'm focusing on transforming it.

Do you understand?

Because our problem begins when we identify with a life theme,

Not to release or transform it,

But to feel miserable or sad or victim.

You see?

So if you are taking it with all your energy and you say,

Okay,

Now this is a period,

And I'm called to take care of it,

Then do it.

But do it with totality,

With all your being,

Not leaving something for tomorrow,

For 10 years from now.

Don't wait to be 50 years old and then continue speaking about it as if nothing really substantial has happened to you,

You see.

Yes.

From Hilder?

From Hilder.

Yes.

Where do the universalized emotions and thoughts come from and why do they exist?

Where do the universalized thoughts and emotions come from and why they exist?

Right?

Interesting.

Where do they come from?

I will tell you a story,

A little myth.

Once upon a time,

A few thousands of years ago,

Human beings have developed,

We don't know how,

They have developed a capacity to think.

Unlike other animals,

Other plants,

They could think.

And their thinking capacity have them tremendously in anticipating scenarios,

You see.

Unlike,

They were able to use this thought to anticipate dangers,

To predict dangers,

To predict situations.

So,

They became different from the rest of nature because they could think ahead.

They could,

And then they could also with their cunning thought,

They were able to create tools and all kinds of devices and systems that are all about planning ahead,

You see.

So,

This was the beginning of thought.

And at the beginning,

It was very nice and very helpful.

It helped humans to avoid predators,

To create tools,

To fight them,

To build houses,

And to,

How is it called,

That revolution that took place?

The agricultural revolution to know how to sew,

How to wait,

And so on and so on and so on.

But then,

This capacity of thinking began to lose control.

And then,

It started using this planning ahead in bad ways.

And this is how it began to,

For example,

Anticipate events that are not really dangerous,

But starting to think about them and starting to worry about them,

To be anxious about them.

This is how thought developed fear,

Worry,

And also desire,

How to make sure that in a repeated way or in a planned way,

One can get what one wants.

But this has become an obsession.

Okay?

So now,

This,

I will not tire you with further explanation,

But this has started generating a momentum,

You see.

It has created such a power that when you are born to this world,

You simply inherit this mind machine,

This thinking machine.

And it's like an endless stream that all day long calculates things ahead,

Worries,

Thinks about the past in order to plan a better future,

And is always,

Always,

Always,

Always dissatisfied.

Why?

Because originally,

It was designed to notice problems,

You see.

Like to show the person,

Hey,

There is a problem here and a problem there,

And take care of it if you want to have a relaxed and healthy life.

But then,

It has begun to only notice problems all the time.

This is how we are now trapped by the thinking machine,

And we always feel that there is a problem even when there is no problem.

Absolutely.

Even when life is quite okay.

We always feel this dark cloud inside us saying,

No,

No,

No,

It is not that,

It is not that.

You should wait for the future.

One day it will be.

If you do this and that,

If you just follow what I'm telling you,

You wait and see.

We will triumph.

So then,

The thinking machine has trapped us in endless waiting,

Waiting for tomorrow.

And even though everyone knows the cliché that tomorrow never comes,

Everyone is waiting,

Waiting,

Waiting.

It's never today,

Never,

Never.

It can never be complete.

It can never be fulfilled.

It cannot be the real thing.

It's always just a little closer,

A little closer.

I'm getting to it,

You see,

But it's never the real thing.

And then it follows our relationships,

And it follows our relationship to work and to ourselves,

Because we are never complete,

You see.

We are never perfect.

There is always a project.

So,

This is where the universalized thoughts and emotions come from.

They come from the endless river of dissatisfaction that started at its origin in the spring of the thinking machine.

To be free from this,

It's like to be free from the very slavery of humanity.

Because even when we feel that we are free,

We are slaves.

We are slaves to this thinking machine.

Yes?

Yes.

I'm not sure which one is the question.

Because you asked would it be smart to focus on my life themes,

And then how could I recognize them?

What is it that you're trying to understand?

How to recognize the life themes,

I guess,

Maybe I already know.

How do you recognize your life themes?

Well,

Think about your major clashes with people,

With yourself.

You don't need now to reach exactly the three to four life themes.

Just find,

Identify one.

And you can find it,

It's like it's a sort of a very basic conflict that you have with the world or with yourself.

You see,

Some feel,

For example,

That they could never belong to the world,

No matter what they do.

Some feel that the world is always limiting them and inhibits their freedom,

That it is suffocating.

Some feel that the world is a dangerous place.

So maybe it makes sense to choose one if I know of several and focus on transforming that.

Exactly.

I guess focusing on transforming it would give my life meaning.

Focusing on transforming it will give your life meaning,

In what sense?

I guess because the energy can come into motion and they feel better and that gets into that meaning.

Yes,

Because when you are entering a life theme,

But first of all know that even if you at first think that you know it and you follow it,

Then it might be something deeper,

Something that it would be a clearer theme,

You see.

So it's good to start.

It's like it's an adventure.

You're following it.

You're finding one thing and then it unfolds and becomes clearer and sharper and more meaningful.

Now,

Again,

Of course,

This could be for a certain time a part of our meaning,

You see.

Why this was inserted in us?

Why this life theme was planted in us like a seed,

Like a potent thing inside us?

That's a good question.

Yes.

Any question over there?

Yes.

This would be probably the last question,

But unless somebody really insists.

Yes.

So it's from Sandra.

So I guess you mean that she should not identify with?

Okay.

And,

Here's the second question.

What should I say to someone having lost a near one that these feelings of sadness are not really personal?

Aha.

Okay.

Two questions.

So now that's truly the last question.

So first question is what about compassion?

Compassion.

Is it also a part of the thinking machine?

Well,

If compassion is real,

Just like love,

Just like truth,

Just like wisdom,

Just like reality,

Just like the now,

Just like beauty.

This can never be a part of the thinking machine.

The thinking machine is by its very nature,

Pay attention to what I'm saying,

It's the mechanical thing.

It's something that is automatic.

And that is a sort of a conditioning.

It's effortless,

But not in a beautiful way,

You see.

This flows endlessly.

And then there are certain capacities and powers and qualities that we manage to come into contact with because we have come out for some time from the thinking machine.

You see?

When we are outside it,

We're beginning to notice reality as it is.

So if compassion is real,

Compassion,

What is compassion?

Compassion is our ability from a state of availability,

Total availability to notice and to be one with the suffering of somebody else.

That's compassion.

Can this be a matter of a thinking machine?

Compassion is by its very nature self-centered,

Self-projecting and unavailable,

Completely unavailable.

It is a thick layer of thoughts,

Emotions.

It cannot really be here,

It is daydreaming.

And compassion is waking up and looking.

Compassion is one of our ways to get in touch with real reality,

A reality that is not thought,

That is seeing,

Noticing.

We all know love,

True love breaks and melts the thinking machine.

And the second question is what do I say to somebody who has just lost someone?

Feeling sadness and crying,

Would I tell them these tears are not personal and so on?

Well,

I think sometimes you might get a slap in the face if you say that.

We should be a part of compassion.

The beauty of compassion is that it is about tuning into the presence of the other.

So in compassion we mostly are free from making the mistake of throwing ourselves on somebody else.

Do you understand?

We are sensitive,

Compassion holds great sensitivity.

It is noticing what the other needs and not what I need from the other.

It's not about throwing on the person my ideology of indifference or whatever.

Because it's not their business,

Right?

Unless they ask for it specifically,

Unless they are open.

When you are here sitting,

I assume that this is what you wanted when you came,

You see.

You came to hear a satan.

But I wouldn't go to the street and say the same words because nobody has asked me to say anything,

Right?

So the question is,

Should I say that is a question that is very specific.

We cannot answer categorically what we should do because compassion is sensitivity.

It notices what is happening right now.

It's specific.

There are no rules in compassion.

Second,

The question is,

Is it true?

Right?

Is this the truth that this is not personal?

And the answer is this is definitely not personal.

Why?

Because everyone that is left is feeling sadness.

Everyone is experiencing death,

Right?

I know that in our mind we can't believe it even though that's the reality of our life.

Life,

Death is always here.

We will lose people.

This is not against us.

Death is a part of life.

The sadness that comes as a result because we have become attached,

We have begun to imagine that there is no death.

And therefore we must at least cry a little.

And it's not so bad to sometimes forget that and become attached.

But when you cry,

Know why you cry.

And don't be covered with self-pity and victim consciousness.

It doesn't happen to you specifically.

This death tends to happen to everyone.

Do you know the story of Tolstoy?

Tolstoy before he died,

When he was very old,

He was walking with his friend.

And he told his friend,

You know what I'm thinking?

I'm thinking perhaps just once,

This time God will forget to take me.

Perhaps this one time.

And then he died.

So death is not personal.

Sadness as a result of loss is not personal.

It is a part of the human condition.

We can go through it,

But without personalizing it.

And that's already maturity.

So let's just take one moment of closing our eyes to gather all the presence and attention of this evening.

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Good.

Thank you so much for sharing this evening.

Thank you.

Good night.