I'm going to be guiding us through what's called the process of self-exploration.
A guided meditation helps us follow triggers as a pathway to healing and growth.
Because as we like to say,
Triggers are friends to follow.
When we experience a trigger,
We can find a lot of benefit from connecting with the internal mechanism of vulnerability or the potential inner work that lies underneath that.
Because when triggers become activated,
It shows up in the here and now.
It gives us something very concrete to work with.
And in particular,
This method allows for a deeper understanding of ourselves and the unprocessed emotions that fuel that trigger.
There's a saying in mental health that when it's hysterical,
It's historical.
And while not always the case,
It highlights how when we react in a big way to something,
It's often a result of past unhealed wounds.
And this practice helps us do that work of healing and moving towards wholeness.
So let's try the practice together.
Taking a few deep breaths to settle into the present moment.
Closing your eyes if that feels safe and comfortable to you.
And bringing to mind an experience that triggered you within the last few weeks.
Even if it was minor.
This could be something that was said or done,
Something that was not said or not done,
Some frustration you experienced.
So keeping that recent experience in mind,
Pausing this if you need more time.
And going back to that scene in as much detail as possible.
Revisiting it and noticing how you feel.
How you feel in the here and now as you revisit it.
Trying to understand how it made you feel when triggered.
And keeping that experience in mind,
I'm going to read a series of statements and ask you to select one that resonates best with your experience of the trigger.
Which of these statements best reflects how it made you feel?
I felt excluded.
I felt like the bad guy.
I felt powerless.
I felt forgotten.
I felt unheard.
I felt unsafe.
I felt unloved.
I felt judged.
I felt blamed.
I felt frustrated.
I felt disrespected.
I felt disconnected.
I felt a lack of affection.
I felt trapped.
I felt uncared for.
I felt lonely.
I felt like I couldn't speak up.
I felt ignored.
I felt manipulated.
I felt like I couldn't be honest.
I felt controlled.
I felt like it was unfair.
Keeping in mind which of those feelings best represents your experience of the trigger and taking another deep breath or two.
Inhaling,
Exhaling slowly.
And keeping your eyes closed ideally and connecting with your earliest childhood memory of having felt that way.
Having felt that item that you selected from the list I just read off.
Taking more time if needed,
Pausing this if needed.
And seeing what first comes to mind.
Basically childhood or adolescence.
What was your earliest memory of having felt that way?
And then going to that scene and recalling it in as much detail as possible including your emotional experience at the time.
Did you feel scared?
Did you feel sad or mad or embarrassed?
Did you tell anyone?
If not,
Why not?
And if so,
What happened next?
And asking yourself,
What were my child self's vulnerable needs at the time?
Did I need comfort or validation or protection?
Perhaps compassion,
Understanding,
Presence,
Patience,
Encouragement.
Did I need love?
Did I need to feel seen or celebrated?
And imagining your child self in your heart and tending to them in a way that meets these needs with words,
With action,
With your imagination.
For example,
You might speak loving words of reassurance to your child self.
You might hold this child version of you in your mind,
In your heart.
Offering comfort,
Offering words,
Offering presence,
Love.
And taking a moment and noticing how your physical body responds to this.
As you attend to these unmet needs that were underneath that trigger and that early experience.
And taking the next moment just to reflect on the experience of having gone through this process including how your perception of this recent trigger,
This recent event may have changed with a little more understanding of your needs and some early experiences that might be underneath that.
And coming back to your breath,
Just noticing the rhythm of your breathing,
Noticing how your body feels and coming back to the room,
Blinking open your eyes when you're ready.
Thank you for doing this practice.
