The 2 Principles That Destroy All Fears And Insecurities

I Ran this session after having a massive insight during a meditation that I was doing. Two questions hit me hard, I asked myself these two questions and I began having realizations that freed me from all of the noise that my insecure mind was making.

Listen to this session if you want to hear about these two principles, it will change the way you look at yourself. And whether it does or doesn't, message me and I will show you how to apply it to your life the way I am doing for myself.

Transcript

Just to introduce who I am and what I represent for those that are new,

What I represent is slowing people down so that they can have everything.

Slowing you down so you can have everything.

What does that mean?

I often use the metaphor of a race car driver.

Race car drivers are going round bends fast,

Right?

Never been in a race car but it seems very fast.

I'm helping you guys to slow down so you can navigate your life but from a place where you are more peaceful inside,

Where you can use your intelligence,

Your mind in a better way.

So it's not driven by fear.

It's not driven by unconscious psychological ideas of what life is.

Instead it is living through guidance inside.

You can call that whatever suits you,

Right?

You've probably got different words to put to this and put it in the chat if you want.

You know some people might say being guided by spirit,

Intuition,

Intelligence,

Creativity,

Flow,

God,

Higher powers,

Whatever else,

Right?

And I realise what I'm really good at is slowing people down to access that.

And then from that place have everything you want.

Everything,

Better health,

Better relationships,

More fun,

Great looking bodies,

Whatever it is,

Better careers,

More money,

All of that is possible from a slowed down place.

So that's what I do.

I work with people one to one.

I do things like this and I host group programs sometimes.

That's me.

And why did I get into this?

Because funnily enough I couldn't slow down for my whole life.

You know it's the cliche of doing the thing that I wish I could have learnt.

I lived a very sped up life.

My mind telling me who I am and what I should do.

I should do this.

This is bad.

This is good.

Society's idea.

This is good.

And I had really low self esteem actually.

I didn't know that at the time but all of the anxiety,

All of the worries,

All of the overthinking,

Over controlling everything,

I have to control,

It was all because I had low self esteem.

That's all going to tie into what I'm going to tell you today by the way.

But this gives you a bit of context why I'm saying this.

And what I realised was there was a bunch of programs or insecurities or tension or resentment I was holding,

Frustration,

It was all like hidden down below somewhere.

I couldn't really see it.

I just experienced the outer manifestation of that which was living in fight or flight mode,

Getting angry for no reason,

Or for a reason but unreasonably angry,

Blaming myself for things,

Judging others,

Judging myself.

Maybe you can relate to some of these.

You could share in the chat if you can relate.

So then,

I'm not going to explain everything that happened.

Let's just say I went on a journey to really know who I am.

Who's in here?

Who's in here?

Who's the person that I look in the mirror?

I realised I actually felt uncomfortable looking in the mirror for most of my life.

You know I saw the physical appearance and I combed my hair and trimmed my beard but I don't think I really ever looked and knew or recognised or loved even that person I was looking at.

There was always this look of,

Oh yeah,

You could be better like this.

Your body could look better.

Judging my body,

You know,

That's how I got into this whole thing.

I got into fitness and health.

I was very thin and I had insecurities about my body.

So I got into fitness and health,

Started working on my body,

Got into yoga at some point,

Started working on my spirit and mind and then did a bit of travelling and coached and that's the very quick story of why I'm here.

So I've learnt a lot of things about the mind and how it relates to the body.

You know,

These days people are catching on to the way that body and mind relate.

We call it psychosomatic now.

Psychosomatic right?

It's one.

Body and mind are one.

They work as a team to avoid danger.

And they form this thing called the ego which you might have heard somewhere,

You might have heard that term.

And tell me in the chat,

What do you think ego is?

What does ego represent based on what you've learnt?

It's not like this is the defined meaning but what does it mean for you?

I'll definitely share what it means to me and how I experienced it after I hear from you guys.

Ego is everything that goes against my true self,

My past,

Gets in the way,

Protection.

Hmm,

Cover up.

Cover up,

Yeah interesting.

Yeah.

Opinion of oneself.

A 007,

What do you mean by that?

I'd love to hear.

I kind of got a,

I'm kind of assuming what you mean but I'd love to hear in your words what you mean by that.

So stubbornness,

Ah yeah.

Yeah so you know I wrote the topic for today as being overcoming all fears and insecurities is all from the ego.

All fears and insecurities.

Seems to be protecting,

Yeah,

Stories.

And I didn't even realise this and the ego is so smart that it will do things like judge other people and try to have righteousness,

You know righteousness,

I am right,

You are wrong.

The way they're doing this thing is not a good thing,

This is not right,

This is wrong.

And it will judge others that feel threatening to us,

It will judge ourselves,

It's not,

It's judging everyone.

It's these ideas of what life is and who we are,

It's an identity,

It's a personal border almost,

A protection really,

It gets formed out of protection.

So I was living in this for my life and like I said some of the times it's covert,

It feels like we are right and we,

Yes I'm so right for saying this and judging that person and getting angry at something.

Insecurities,

Fears,

Tension,

It comes from this place of something is wrong,

I'm disturbed,

I am disturbed.

Appreciate the comment.

Serenity,

Yeah let's make this a serenity space,

You know,

That's it.

That's why I say I'm here to slow people down,

To bring you into that slow place.

The slow place is where the ego can be seen,

You know,

You think of it like a cloak that the ego wears.

When we're moving fast we can't see it,

We can't be free from it because it runs the show.

Moving fast is ego in action.

Rushing,

Panic,

Worry,

Stress,

That's when we are wearing the suit of ego.

When we slow down we can see it,

We can kind of see,

Oh I'm wearing this cloak,

Ah I didn't see that before.

I'm wearing this cloak called ego,

Ah okay,

I can take that off.

So to go more into this,

And it's not going to be all theory,

I'm going to take you through some practices in a moment and tell you what these principles are by the way,

I'm just framing it up for you.

The ego is formed because it believes that we are in danger,

It's a protection mechanism like someone said.

And I wrote this down the other day,

Let me just quickly check exactly what I wrote.

I wrote ego stands for existence,

One second,

I'm going to tell you the exact sentence that I said,

Because it was a time when I was having a massive insight.

Oh,

Existence guarding officer,

Existence guarding officer.

And that wasn't taken from a book,

It was just something that came up for me.

It's guarding the existence,

Because overcoming all fears and insecurities,

All fears,

And this is just my opinion,

My experience,

Maybe you guys don't agree,

Maybe you don't right,

But I believe,

Based on my experience,

That all fears come from the fear of death.

Not like the actual moment of death happening,

Because we don't know what that is,

We have no memory or experience of that,

We have no experience of what that is.

But it's the fear of death in the sense of our aliveness being taken away.

And the threat.

All fears,

All disturbance,

All operations of the ego,

I realized,

For me anyway,

That it came from that.

I'm worried about what people will say,

Oh that means,

To the root translation,

You know,

You can look up all different things that will tell you what this means,

Talk to psychotherapists,

Or whatever,

But for me,

The root of that is my existence is going to get taken away.

If I am rejected,

Fear of rejection,

That means I could,

Yeah,

I'm under threat,

My actual aliveness is under threat.

That's what the program is telling me,

Telling the body,

Telling the mind,

Go in fight or flight,

Because you could die.

Close your heart,

Because an open heart means more danger.

Tense every part of the body,

Tense everything,

Because then you'll be stronger.

That's what's going on inside.

Fear of being unloved,

Someone judging you.

It's like this,

It comes to the same thing.

Someone can hurt me.

I could be left alone,

And that means,

Alone means I might die again.

Fear of time,

Running out.

Has anyone experienced that one?

I've experienced that one a lot.

Time passing by,

Time passing by,

I'm getting older.

Analyzing oh,

What does this mean about me?

This again,

This fear of aliveness being taken away.

I have this time on this earth,

And I'm not spending it,

So fear comes in,

Saying you're not spending your time well.

Your aliveness is being threatened.

Your freedom is being threatened.

So then the body again gets tense.

Oh no,

This is a problem.

So everything I had through my life I realized was a fear of death.

So the two principles I'm going to share with you hopefully will help you with overcoming all fears,

If what I'm saying is applicable to you.

If you're finding this relates in any way,

That you feel this danger,

You feel bodily sensations,

Fight or flight mode,

Like I say,

Mind and body are one.

Body reacts to danger by tensing things,

Closing things that are not needed.

I don't need a heart when my life is under threat.

I don't need to be open.

I don't need to be open.

I need to be guarded.

I need to close off just in case some arrows hit me.

I don't need to be calm.

I need to be on it.

I need adrenaline to be high if there's danger.

So the body is working based on what the mind is saying,

Based on the situation,

Right?

For me it was things like public speaking,

And not even like speaking in front of a crowd.

It was like going and talking to one person,

Going to a store sometimes,

To speak to the person behind the counter,

To pay for something.

I would sweat and feel anxious and worried.

Can anyone relate to that?

I don't know if it was just me that experienced that,

But I wouldn't be able to talk to people at a store.

I would be looking down and pretend I'm busy and not looking at people in the eye.

So in my head,

So anxious and worried and all this stuff going on trapped in my head.

In that example,

It was like a fear of rejection.

The fear of someone really seeing who I was,

So I'd have to be vulnerable.

Or me getting something wrong.

That was probably what was going on.

If I get something wrong,

I'm a bad person.

I'm not really good.

I'm not competent.

If I'm not competent,

Then what does that mean?

Oh well,

Underneath all of that,

I'm not competent means I'm going to be rejected.

That means I'm going to be alone.

That means I'm under threat.

That means I could die.

My aliveness is threatened again.

So let me know if this is relating to you guys in the chat.

Anytime just feel like saying things.

Going deep here.

Telling you some real truths about me.

And hopefully through me,

It's relating to you.

And here's why this is beautiful.

I'll tell you that.

You know,

I'm not here to,

I don't do these sessions to just bring up pain for people.

To rub it in and say,

Yeah,

This is what's happening.

I'm not doing this to tell you information to keep you there.

Right?

Because you might have figured that stuff out already.

I'm here to tell you two principles for overcoming it.

That's why I titled that for this session.

Number one.

This relates to slowing down.

But number one is slowing down enough so you can ask the question,

Am I going to die?

And I'm serious with this one.

How powerful this is insane.

I actually bought myself some wristbands so I can remember this forever.

Am I going to die?

Asking this in any moment you feel rushed.

And this is not just like when you're in panic situations.

Anytime you feel yourself anxious,

Rushing to go and do something for work,

Feeling like you're worried about anything,

Walking too fast,

Someone judging you,

You feel hurt.

Or like the big things that come up as well.

The really challenging,

Scary things that come up and bring you into fight or flight.

Ask yourself,

Am I going to die?

Am I going to die?

Because if you ask your ego a question,

Your intellect,

If you ask your mind a question,

It has to answer.

It's like commanding the ship.

Tell me,

Am I going to die?

Tell me,

Am I going to die?

It will know the answer's no.

If you really,

Really ask this.

It's not a trick.

It's a real honest question.

Asking yourself really deeply,

Am I going to die?

Am I going to die?

In this moment,

By the way.

And the lovely thing about this question,

It almost has a two-pronged approach.

Because I am going to die physically someday.

That's powerful in itself to say,

Oh my God,

I'm going to live my life.

You know,

It speaks to that fear of death in a way.

But the way I've been using it as well is as a present moment prompt.

When I feel like I'm rushing,

Under threat,

Am I going to die?

Am I?

I realize our bodies can handle more than we are convinced by.

If the heart is beating,

Asking it honestly from a slowed down state.

And that's why I'm going to take you through an exercise in a moment.

From an aware state,

Am I going to die?

An answer back will always be no.

As you know,

You're not going to die.

This works for anything.

This is working for me for anything.

I want to do something new.

I want to try something new.

It doesn't always have to be about challenges.

It could be like you want to start a new career,

But you're worried about it.

Ah,

What will happen?

Will this be difficult?

Am I going to die?

It talks to the anxiety.

It talks to the sensations.

Write this one down.

Play.

I'm not saying this is a magical thing.

I'm saying experiment.

Like if you're going to experiment with a juice diet.

You try it out,

Right?

You don't know if it's going to help.

Try it on.

That's my invitation.

Number one,

Principle.

Am I going to die?

Really the principle is slowing down.

The principle is slowing down because that's what am I going to die does.

Slowing down.

Slowing down and seeing.

What the truth is versus what the mind says.

The truth.

It's not like a trick.

It's not a spiritual belief that you have to buy into.

It's not like,

Oh,

I have to believe that there are these spiritual laws.

It's not that.

It's just,

Am I going to die?

What's the truth?

Being in the reality of it.

Dropping in.

I call it being in the head.

Being in the world versus in the head.

Here's an example.

I'll guide you through a meditation in a moment.

I was in India with an ex-girlfriend of mine.

We were traveling for hours.

Hours on this bus.

We get to this place to check in.

Exhausted.

I'm starving.

I'm hungry.

Well,

Starving,

Exactly.

That's an exaggeration right there.

I was saying I'm starving when I wasn't.

You know?

I was getting into that state of tension and tiredness.

I just wanted to check in,

Get into the place and just sleep,

Relax.

It'd been a busy few weeks.

So we get in and there's a massive queue first.

I'm speaking to the people saying,

Hey,

What's going on?

Why are you so busy?

I still got my cool at that point,

But there's this inner tension bubbling.

This hangriness,

As they say.

Hangry.

So then they take a long time to finally get to us.

And then they have a mistake occur.

And they say,

Oh,

Sorry,

We have to do something with your room.

I don't know.

I forgot what it was,

But they said we have to do something with your room and change rooms.

And I'm getting more angry.

I'm like,

OK,

Fine.

What can I do about this?

Fine.

I'm just sitting there.

Eventually,

They give us the room and I'm like,

Oh,

Thank God.

Then we go to the restaurant downstairs.

Restaurant is full.

Taking forever.

Place open.

And then they screw up the order.

I'm hungry as hell.

And they bring this,

The wrong order to the table.

Right.

I'm like,

OK,

I'll eat it anyway.

Fine.

Whatever.

And then the bill comes and they've charged it wrong.

So then I have to,

After my meal,

I have to speak to the manager.

I have to talk to him and explain.

And he's arguing with me,

Saying,

No,

No,

No,

No,

No.

And it's just this like ongoing mess.

And I was just tense the whole time.

This is like two hours.

I'm just annoyed at the world,

You know.

And then my ex-girlfriend says to me,

She says to me,

Raj,

You know,

You're really ugly when you're in this state.

You physically look ugly.

You're ugly.

You speak ugly.

You talk ugly.

Everything about you is ugly.

And I just burst out laughing.

Like it threw me off.

It threw me off so much that I burst out laughing.

My whole body relaxed.

I was like,

She hit me with a wake up call.

Whole body relaxed.

I laughed at myself.

I laughed at the situation.

Wow.

How many things could occur in one night that could annoy me?

Wow.

And it just snapped me out of it.

So I say that story to emphasize the first point of slowing down enough so you can see,

Am I going to die?

What's the reality?

What's the bigger picture here?

Snapping out and coming back to the spirit inside rather than the mind.

The thing that is watching.

The thing that's watching and laughing at everything that's going on.

Like the smiling Buddha,

You know,

The laughing Buddha.

They have those little statues in Thailand.

He's just sitting there with his big belly laid out on the floor.

He's just laughing along and everything,

You know,

Blissed out.

That's who we are underneath everything.

When we see that these fears and insecurities are the mind saying things.

Am I going to die?

Slowing down into that.

That's the first principle,

Guys.

Let me know if anything came up for you.

I'm going to take us through a meditation now to play with this.

So think of a fear or insecurity you have right now.

Write it down mentally and think about it,

Something that's been challenging you for a while.

Some fear,

Doubt you might have some block in your self-esteem.

Think about it.

What is it?

And you can share in the chat if you want.

If you want to engage with everyone here,

You know,

We're all here together loving each other.

So if you want,

Share it in the chat,

What is the fear or insecurity that you have?

So have that in your mind as we go into the meditation.

Something that keeps getting in your way.

Some worries,

Concerns,

Either it's like about a present moment situation or is this ongoing thing that has been lurking for a while.

Think about it.

And for those people sharing,

Yeah,

You're brave.

You know,

As soon as one person shares about something,

If someone else is thinking that,

They're like,

Ah,

Well,

Me too.

You know,

So it's lovely to put things in the chat and share.

It frees you as well.

You know,

It doesn't become this secret anymore.

I think that's what mine was.

My fear was sharing.

My fear was being vulnerable.

That's why I do it so much now because it's like I'm free from it.

The more I do it,

Being vulnerable to share was my fear,

To show myself who I am,

To reveal myself,

You know.

Okay,

People are saying not fulfilling my purpose,

Being myself in romantic relationships,

Insecurities when it comes to love,

Not being enough at work and home,

Fear and I will fear.

No,

What's that?

An uncluttered home.

Okay.

Yeah,

Interesting.

Being good enough,

Speaking out loud.

Ah,

That's one I had a lot.

Team calls.

Yeah,

I couldn't even do team calls.

I couldn't answer the phone if anyone was near me.

I'd feel so insecure about answering a phone.

I would look at my phone and just hide it.

You know,

I wouldn't answer phones if anyone was near me.

That was a big thing I had.

So I can relate to what you've said.

And I'm,

They're coming through fast now.

So I'm going to read a few more out.

Not being heard,

Expressing yourself,

Future.

Never being seen if you start a business.

Ah,

Oh,

Sorry,

Being seen if you start a business.

Yes,

That was huge for me as well.

So yeah,

I can relate to that.

The business part,

Especially,

Especially now I'm on social media and all these things.

I had big insecurities about that before.

So everyone that's sharing,

I hope it feels freeing to share.

Now shame is one of those,

Those big things that create more challenges.

So sharing,

Getting it out.

Yeah,

Nice.

So we're going to go into a meditation.

Remember what you said in your,

If you shared it or if you didn't share it,

Remember what your fear or insecurity is.

And close your eyes once you're ready.

We're going to do a little practice.

So what we're first going to do is we're going to bring fresh,

New breath into our bodies.

Almost as if you had a fish tank that's got murky water.

We're going to clean the fish tank a little bit.

So start to notice your breath moving through your body.

And now make sure your mouth is closed and just breathe through the nose,

In and out.

And let the breath move all the way down to the belly as if a balloon was being filled.

Deep belly breaths.

And now what I want you to do is to make the breath even deeper.

And we're going to practice something called the ocean breath,

Which if you've ever done yoga you might be aware of.

So it just means an audible sound.

So you can just hear your breath.

It's deep enough for you to hear the breath as a sound.

Sounds like the ocean waves crashing.

So let me show you.

Deep ocean breaths.

Even if that sounds challenging,

Think of snoring.

Like a snoring breath.

You can make the snoring sound as well.

Keep going,

Smile a little bit.

Imagine being next to a loud snorer,

But that's you.

So if you notice a heat building in your body,

Keep going.

Keep going.

Last one.

Okay,

Let it go.

Keep your mouth closed.

And let your breathing go back to normal.

Stop all efforts.

Let go.

Let your body drop.

Relax your jaw.

And your tongue.

Let go of any other tension you're holding in the body.

Now think about that fear,

Worry,

Security you had.

And talk to it.

And ask it,

Is this fear coming from worry that I am in physical danger?

And I'm not okay?

And tell it,

You're okay.

You're not going to die.

You're not going to die.

And see if your body can relax a little more.

Knowing you're okay.

You're not going to die.

In this moment.

And in every moment.

Your body and your mind can be reminded.

And relaxed.

Knowing that you are okay.

And notice what comes through for you during this experience.

Any emotions?

Thoughts?

Sights?

And we're going to end the practice there.

So move your fingers,

Toes.

Open your eyes.

And.

.

.

So let me know what came up for you during that experience.

Put it in the chat.

Were you able to see or experience your challenge in a different way?

Did it bring up more challenges?

There's not always enlightenment or bliss.

Hmm,

Suffering,

Afraid of suffering.

It became much smaller,

Almost adorable.

Ah,

Interesting,

Yeah.

Body felt distracted but my mind.

.

.

No,

My body felt relaxed but my mind was still distracted.

Yeah.

That's really normal.

You know the body is in yogic systems,

The body is the first layer that we have.

And then there's four other layers.

So if you can slow the body down,

Then you've gotten through one layer.

Slowing the mind down is a bit more challenging.

Can be anyway.

It really worked.

Nice.

Yeah,

I'm recording this.

It's impossible to practice being connected to myself at my job.

Ah,

Yeah.

I can imagine probably bringing up a lot of stuff,

Right?

Doing a lot of things at once.

Tears,

More challenges heightened.

I have to face who I am.

Yes,

You know that.

.

.

More challenges come up.

You know,

It's like we reveal things.

When the unconscious becomes conscious,

We're revealing it out in front of us.

And I've had conversations with my ego,

Very deep ones.

I've heard every single whisper of it.

It's constantly trying to be comfortable and avoid things.

So it runs quite deep.

But the more you can see it and slow down to listen to it,

The more you realize,

Firstly,

You are not it.

You are not it.

It is the thing that you hear.

But secondly,

You start becoming what you really are,

Which is.

.

.

I call it innate peace.

The peace that's within.

So I'm glad you had some of these experiences,

Guys.

It's where all of the freedom can occur from.

Now,

Once our bodies are calmer,

The body doesn't feel like it's under threat anymore.

That's why I'm a big advocate of movement and foods.

And I'm not just about meditation and talking about these things.

I see it as a system.

I really see it as a science.

That's why I had to understand every part of it.

Like,

How does the body get involved?

How can I support this body so it doesn't get so worried about death?

And how can I make the mind work with the body as well?

So they're both not worried about these things.

So,

If you really see through any fear,

Insecurity,

Even things like you say you want to start a business,

Someone said,

The imposter syndrome,

All of that is coming from the same thing.

It's all from ego,

It's all from fear.

It's all from fear of our life being under threat.

It's the same thing.

If you really see it,

And you tell yourself in those moments,

Am I going to die?

Asking an honest question,

As if you were asking,

As if you were really asking some things,

You know?

So,

That's the first principle,

Slowing down,

Slowing down the body and mind.

That's the first principle of overcoming all fears and insecurities.

Slowing down enough that you can see,

You can see what's happening.

I'm not saying this is the perfect thing that you're going to be enlightened and free from everything.

I'm just saying you can see it,

And you become,

You don't have to be in this fight or flight mode constantly.

You just know what's going on,

And you are able to be autonomous.

It's one of my favorite things,

To be autonomous.

I'm the one in here.

I'm the one with the body and the mind.

I'm experiencing anxiety,

I'm experiencing discomfort,

I'm experiencing sadness.

I'm seeing all of it,

I'm feeling it,

I'm letting it all move.

I experience all these things still,

But I'm allowing it to be and move.

So it doesn't become this panic thing anymore.

It's just an occurrence,

Like the wind and the rain.

That's the first principle guys.

Second principle,

Which is very important.

This really will get us through it.

I'll call it heart power.

Heart power.

And I might sound like a broken record if you've come to my sessions before,

But I always say this.

I didn't know I had a heart.

I only knew that the heart meant cardiovascular machine that works when I run.

When I talk about heart,

I'm talking about the,

You can call it the spiritual heart.

Some people use that kind of term.

I'm talking about the thing that we feel when we're connected to others.

The thing when you look at a flower and you're like,

Wow,

It's beautiful,

Wow,

It's that sweetness of life.

It's playfulness.

When you're being playful,

My parents,

For example,

They tease each other and they flirt with each other like 18-year-olds.

They're so playful.

They're like little kids and they're in their 60s.

And I see it and I'm like,

This is hilarious.

They've got this sweetness about them.

It's the thing that makes us laugh.

When we're laughing,

When we're just there,

Joy,

That's all from the heart.

All that's from the heart.

So the second part of this,

The second principle,

If you can slow yourself down and see,

And the second part of this is to be love.

To be love.

To experience that love that's within.

Not from someone else.

Not feeling love from another person.

Not romantic love.

None of that.

Just the love that's within.

The thing that makes you laugh when you see some funny thing on YouTube.

The thing that when you smile you feel this warmth inside,

Right?

That's what I'm talking about when I say the heart's power.

I see it as a power.

It's a tool.

I see things as tools,

By the way.

That's how I work.

If you ever speak to one of my one-to-one clients,

I'll tell them being a yogi or being a human,

Really,

Someone that can use everything as a tool.

You can use your body as a tool.

You can use your heart.

You can use your breath.

You can use the sun and the moon.

You can use anything,

Anything as a tool.

That's going to help you become more free and just have the highest experience of life.

The heart definitely did that for me.

I think my life was completely different before I started feeling love and joy.

I don't even think I had a life,

Really.

It was like an illusion of a life.

I was so close to things,

Judgy and protecting everything.

That's how I got into the heart.

It allowed me to connect to other people.

It allowed me to laugh and be more relaxed in situations.

Here's an example.

If I experience fear or ego or anger or tension and I laugh at myself,

I'm literally ridiculing myself saying,

Oh my God,

You're doing it again.

You're doing it again,

Raj.

I get into hysteric laughter sometimes.

Because I realize,

Oh,

You're getting angry about something that doesn't matter at all.

It's all this like play inside my head.

You're getting worried about a future situation when you're not even there yet.

It's ridiculous,

Raj.

It's hilarious.

Can you laugh at yourself with love?

Not judging yourself,

Not shaming yourself,

But laughing in a playful,

Loving way.

Because when I laugh at myself and I say,

Ah,

You think this is what's happening,

You think this is what's going to happen,

But it's using a brain that doesn't know.

And you're sitting there thinking about it when there's not help popping.

It's quite funny.

It's hilarious.

So how can you bring more joy and lightness to things?

That's the second principle.

Playfulness.

And it relates to the first principle because when you know you're okay,

When you know I'm okay and I can see I'm not going to die,

You can feel this love and joy after that.

And this might not be easy for everyone.

I know it wasn't for me.

So in the chat,

Let me ask you,

What comes up for you when I talk about lovingness,

Heart?

Do you have any challenges with this?

What insights are you having as I say this?

Put something in the chat.

I'll tell you how you can do this in a moment,

Just like I did before.

I'll guide you through something.

What comes up for you as I've talked about the heart and being playful?

I laughed at myself and,

Like,

It's not a big deal,

But deep down I feel so lost and I don't see anything funny about it.

Yeah.

Who's the I that feel lost?

That's the question.

Who's the I?

What is I?

Who's the I?

Who is it?

That's a deep question I've asked myself sometimes.

Who is that that feels that?

Where is that person?

Ultimately,

When I'm saying,

When I'm asking that question,

I'm telling you to see the I is the ego.

It's the ego that feels lost.

It's the thoughts that are saying lost.

Yeah,

There you go.

You said my body because my soul is capable.

Exactly.

There you go.

Soul is okay.

Soul is always okay.

Soul doesn't have,

Is unscathed by everything.

It's a golden light that doesn't go out.

It's the ego that feels lost.

It's the body that feels tense.

Who's the I?

That's another good question to ask.

Who's the I?

Who is I?

It's an idea.

I'm too serious and sensitive.

Yes,

I get it.

Like that was me for sure.

I get when you say that.

I'm too serious and sensitive.

You know,

That's something I've had to work on quite a lot.

Even this year.

Because I've caught myself getting too serious.

I've been in front of clients sometimes,

Realizing I'm too serious.

I'm tense.

I'm giving them tense energy now.

When it doesn't have to be so serious.

No.

Life is ups and downs,

Right?

There's all sorts of things going on.

But deep inside,

Like you said in the chat,

There's the soul that's there.

The quiet space within.

The thing that can be snapped out.

Like I told you about that story.

When my ex-girlfriend said that you look ugly.

It was the ego that was ugly.

I was being an ego.

But as soon as she caught me and I laughed,

I was back to the truth that was there.

I was laughing.

I was laughing at myself for getting so serious,

Taking it too seriously.

What was it that changed your perspective to become open?

Thank you for the question.

Opening the heart and doing that through knowing I'm okay.

Being more vulnerable and connecting with others.

Sharing who I am.

Using my body.

Cleaning out things that were not serving me.

Foods,

Habits,

People sometimes.

Things I was doing,

Even.

Activities that were ego driven.

A lot of shifts happened.

It wasn't like there's one thing,

But a lot of shifts happened for me to open the heart.

Thanks for sharing everyone.

Let's go through a practice.

Let's do one more practice.

Close your eyes when you're ready.

Close your eyes when you're ready.

Notice if you feel tense,

Bothered.

Maybe you're judging yourself,

Saying,

Huh,

Why can't I experience that thing Raj is talking about?

Frustrated.

That's how I used to feel when I heard people talk about this.

Just be with that.

Notice it.

Whatever you're feeling,

Notice it.

Now bring your awareness to your heart.

All your attention.

And let each breath expand of art.

Forcing it,

Not trying so hard.

So let each breath move into the heart.

And ask yourself,

Am I going to die?

Right now.

Am I okay?

Right now.

And then picture somebody in your life that really makes you feel warm and tingly inside.

I picture my little nephew.

Cute.

Smiling.

Picture that person for you.

See them laughing and joking.

See them enjoy.

See if you can smile a little bit as well.

Now see them in pain and suffering.

And feel compassion for them.

Love.

Feel your love.

In your heart.

All the emotions move through your heart.

With each breath.

And ask yourself,

Am I love?

Am I the love that's in the stars?

In the trees?

In the birds?

Am I love that's in laughter?

That's in dancing?

That's in joy?

Am I love?

Breathe into the heart.

Find the practice there.

Open your eyes.

You may know if anything came up for you there.

Challenges.

Insight.

Joy.

Because no matter what you say,

Or what your thoughts say,

You are love.

There's no way a.

.

.

There's no way you could have been formed without love.

It doesn't work.

There's no way that oxygen moves without love.

There's no way we wake up without love.

There's no way we can feel anything without love.

It's impossible scientifically.

Let me know if anything came up during that practice.

You know,

It's again asking,

Asking the ego,

Asking your mind the question,

Am I love?

It might say no.

I can't do all this stuff.

But inside,

Deep down,

There is a knowing that there is love there.

Even if you can't see it straight away,

Even if you can't experience it,

Even if it's discomfort.

Even if there's so much resistance to that question.

It might be right.

Am I love?

It's not saying,

Am I loved?

With a D at the end.

It's not necessary.

Am I loved?

That's saying I need it from the outside.

I need it from the outside.

I need,

I need.

Am I love?

It's just saying,

Am I love?

Without needing anything.

Is that inside me?

I've been practicing this a lot with my meditation practice.

Now we feel resistance,

We've got to stop,

Or our mind's racing,

Or anxiety.

Asking these two questions,

These two principles I've shared.

First principle is slowing down.

Slowing down to see and asking,

Am I going to die?

You see,

You know,

The resistance,

The doing mode,

The tension,

It's all this worry that we're going to lose something.

There's a scarcity.

If I don't rush,

If I don't do this,

If that person says this thing to me,

This thing in the future,

It's all this worry about scarcity.

Something being taken away.

Losing something.

So slowing down,

You can literally stop the fear in its tracks.

And then asking,

Am I love?

Connecting to that feeling of love,

To joy,

Laughter.

You know,

Even if you don't feel like doing it,

You might say,

No,

I'm having a challenge,

This is so hard.

Try it.

Just try.

See if for a moment you can picture some kids laughing and having fun and joy,

Or a memory that you've had from your life when you were just having so much fun and laughing and joy.

Love for someone,

Picture someone,

It opens the heart again.

Fear cannot exist when love is there.

It just doesn't work.

It's the opposite.

Or ego,

Let's say.

Ego can't exist when love's there.

You know,

Like when I say fear,

This is really what I'm talking about.

I'm talking about ego.

I'm not talking about actual danger.

I'm not saying to destroy the feelings that we naturally have when we experience insecurity.

I'm not saying we get rid of it.

I'm saying we can break out of the paralysis of it,

Of the distortion,

Let's say,

That ego creates.

I feel challenges all the time.

But the greatest work I've been able to do on myself is getting myself out of it,

Seeing past it.

So,

That's the two principles I've got for you today.

And of course,

This is a short session.

I'm not saying everything's going to be changed.

Everything's going to be instant or magical.

Maybe it is.

I don't know.

That happens sometimes too.

Maybe it is.

You tell me,

Right?

But hopefully you got something from today to see that these things that we believe are permanent don't have to be fixed permanent traits of ourselves.

I used to call myself a socially anxious person.

I used to say,

I've got a problem.

Oh,

Like even within that,

When I looked into it more,

I realized I just wasn't in the nice situations with people socially.

Wasn't anything wrong with me.

It was just ways I was seeing things,

Judging myself,

Really.

It was all about judgment on myself.

Self-esteem,

You know.

How we are ourselves.

That's the thing that ego is all credit around.

So,

The last question I'd love to ask is,

What did you get from today?

How did you find this session useful?

What's your takeaway?

Did you see anything new and fresh?

Did it spark any insights in you?

Share in the chat.

I'd love to see.

There's a lot of you here,

Actually,

Right now.

A lot of people here.

So,

Tell me what you've gotten from this,

As you spent your beautiful Sunday with me.

I've given you a glimpse of some things that could potentially help you with insecurities and fears.

Okay,

Great.

So,

People have said,

Seeing things with different lenses.

Yeah,

A different eye.

That's what the third eye represents.

It's a different eye.

A different eye to see things out of,

You know.

Tell yourself you're not going to die.

Yeah.

And when I say that,

Like I said,

It's not like this quick-fire technique.

It's actually,

Like,

Really,

Really asking yourself this.

As if you were asking yourself,

What shall I eat right now?

Right?

What would I love to eat right now?

It's like that kind of way of asking it.

It's asking from a loving place,

Really.

Am I going to die?

Like a little kid asking their mum something.

And the mum might say,

No,

I know it feels like that,

But you're not.

And the kid's like,

Ah,

Yeah,

That's what it is.

Okay,

Great.

I'm glad you guys got something from this.

And,

Yeah,

Awesome.

I'm glad you got something from the soothing voice.

Yes.

You know,

People ask me sometimes,

Did you always have a voice that was calming?

And I say,

No,

It's just become because I've accessed the calm inside.

I'm confident with using the voice now.

I was very,

Very anxious about speaking about my voice,

About having a conversation with people even.

Through the process,

It's just coming out naturally now.

Glad you guys got something from this.

And,

You know,

Like I always say this in my sessions,

If there's something specific that you had today or something you're challenged by,

Just drop me a message on here on Insight Timer or on Instagram.

Raj Garcia is my username.

And tell me,

Like,

What do you want to work on?

What are you worried about?

What do you want in life?

You know,

Like whatever you want.

That's why I say slow down to have everything.

Because you can have everything.

It's just thinking that gets in the way.

Invitation to drop me a message.

Ask me anything and I'll point you in the right direction.

I might message you a voice note,

Whatever,

You know.

And on Instagram,

I have 50 or I don't even know how many,

At least 50 books.

I've got a little highlight which says book recommendations.

I've got 50 books there.

I've written a little personal note about each book and why you should read it.

Check it out.

Check it out.

I think you might find that interesting.

I read a lot of books.

I recommend a lot of books.

So if you don't want to message me,

You can just check that there.

Raj Gorsia is my Instagram tag.

And my website is withraj.

Com.

On there,

If you go on there,

This little pop-up will come up to say,

Do you want to read a six-page guide called Five Ways to Overcome Overthinking?

Five Ways to Overcome Overthinking.

I wrote this little guide.

It talks about a few things about food,

Body.

It talks about the mind,

What it is doing to us.

Five Ways to Overcome Overthinking.

You just type your email in and you'll get it straight away basically.

And that means you'll be added to my mailing list where I send fresh new articles.

Whenever I have insights like this one,

I've shared in my last email,

I shared about these two principles in a written form.

So if you want to get the next email,

It's probably going to be something about ego again.

If you want to get that next email,

Go to my website.

You'll get a free guide and you'll be on my list basically.

So you'll hear all the updates.

So that's everything from me,

Guys.

I appreciate you being here,

Keeping your attention,

Working on yourselves.

There wasn't platforms like this when I was challenged by my mind.

So yeah,

Well done you for being here,

For working on yourselves.

Just know this.

It's going to sound very,

Very cliche but I have to say it anyway.

Just know whatever you're challenged by and whatever you want in life,

There's always a way,

There's always a path.

People sometimes come to me and they say,

Raj,

I would love if my life was more blissed out and moments of overthinking rather than how it is now where I'm always in overthinking and challenges.

I say,

Okay,

Let's do it.

That's how much I believe this is possible.

So I'll leave that with you.

Just know that you're on the right path.

And if you want some help with that,

You know where to find me.

You've got my website,

You've got everything.

Send me a message,

Tell me what you're going through and I'll make sure you will get that help some way or another.

It's very important to me to make that impact.

Okay,

We're at the time,

90 minutes.

Leaving you there.

If you are an insight timer,

Go and check the course out,

The 7 Days Self-Mastery course.

I think you'll enjoy it a lot.

It's 7 days,

But if you really use those 7 days,

You'll get like a month's worth of benefits pretty much.

You'll see a month's worth of insights perhaps.

So check it out.

Go in there and let me know and just send me messages in that course or whatever.

And enjoy.

All right,

Guys.

I'm going to leave you there.

And if you come to my next session,

I don't know when that's going to be.

Reviews

Beautiful! So naturally insightful! Thank you for this Raj!

Perfect! Clear explanations followed by guided practice. Simple and easy to incorporate