How To Overcome Confidence Blocks For Taking Action

I know confidence was the thing I wanted most for most of my life, I had all sorts of anxieties, worries, and fears. So in this session, I share some of my experiences with the aim to create insight in you. Not to tell you what to do, but to spark some of your inner wisdom. If you felt a connection to me whilst listening, write to me either here. I want to invite my type of people into my world. Loving you. Raj

Transcript

What I want to do is invite everyone to take a moment to have some space.

If your day has been busy so far,

Or your day is just getting started,

Or you have some busyness coming up,

Perhaps you do.

I want to invite you right now to freshen up,

Let's call it.

When you go to the bathroom and you freshen up.

You've just been on a two hour call as well,

So this is great for me as well.

So when you're ready,

Close your eyes.

Close your eyes,

Get into whatever position feels comfortable.

Keep your awareness switched on,

Meaning listen to my voice and notice yourself.

Use your environment around you,

Sense the space in the room,

The space around you.

And the space inside you.

Think about your heart,

It's beating.

But inside it there's some space.

And outside it there's some space.

Think about your head.

It's a brain.

Inside the head there's also space.

Onto your stomach,

And notice the breath moves the stomach.

In and out.

See if you can find some space in and around the stomach.

A throat,

Notice how the air moves through the throat.

And the space in and around the throat.

See if you can bring some space to the thoughts you have and the feelings you feel.

And let go.

Dissolve into the space.

The space around you.

Space above you.

In the whole universe,

Space there is.

Space inside you.

Now we're going to end the practice there.

So you can gently start to connect with your body.

And open your eyes.

Be in this space together.

We'll continue the session in a moment.

In a moment of silence.

We'll continue the session in a moment of silence.

How do you feel after that little practice of space?

Feel free to share in the chat.

If you've never been to my sessions,

I encourage you to just use the chat however you want.

You can talk to me,

You can talk to the group,

You can talk to yourself.

It's a mode of expression,

You know.

You know there's a phrase,

Better out than in.

Better out than in.

It always feels good to express ourselves.

Always.

Even if that's writing.

It's just some way to get it out.

It swirls around in here.

And it tries to find conclusions and analysis.

When we get it out sometimes it's different.

So use the chat.

Talk to each other,

Talk to me,

Talk to yourself.

Express.

Anything.

There's no judgement here.

There's no judgement here.

That's the thing I want to invite into this space,

As I said.

Because that's how I find,

You know I've been trying to figure out how do people get the most from group situations.

And it's always when there is an openness and it feels like we're all connected.

I remember when I was younger,

I used to always find it so challenging to put my hand up in class.

Even when I knew the answer.

I knew it.

I was like,

Please don't ask me,

Teacher.

And I will not put my hand up.

But I know the answer.

Because I used to be so introverted and so anxious about speaking and talking and expressing myself.

But then the rare times I did,

I was like,

I feel so nice.

I feel so nice for people to understand and accept me.

So that's just an invitation.

Use the chat if you like.

If you feel like it.

If you don't want to,

That's also okay.

No judgement.

The other thing I'd say before we continue,

It's almost like I say these things as a way to use this session.

You have a tool.

There's ways you can use tools.

You can get a saw.

My dad told me this.

He's very much into using tools.

Like real tools.

So there's a saw.

There's a way you can use a saw to cut wood efficiently.

I was just pulling the thing along.

And he's like,

Really feel the length of the movement with your arm.

Use the tool like this.

And it felt so much smoother.

So much more enjoyable.

Less effort.

It was taking it in.

It was just great.

So I always make a point to tell people how to use these tools.

Everything.

How to use your body.

How to use everything.

This session is a tool.

I like to see everything as a tool.

So use this tool of the session to listen in a way that you're listening to music.

You're just listening to it.

You're listening to it and then things arise in you.

You might like to dance.

Maybe that arises in you.

So what I mean by that is listen for a way for you to,

Even if you've heard all these things before,

I'm not here for information.

I'm not an informational person where I want to tell you things thinking that that's going to change everything because there's books everywhere.

There's resources everywhere.

You can Google things.

Information is everywhere.

You can get it if you want.

And I'm here for transformation.

And transformation is when there's an insight that you have or the way you think starts changing.

You're open,

You see something differently.

And insight comes when we're just listening.

Just listening.

I'm not saying whether it's right or wrong.

I don't need to decide what this means.

Just listening.

See what comes in automatically on its own.

See if you can listen for insight rather than information.

That's my next invitation to you.

And the next thing I'll say is,

Yeah,

Feel free to ask me anything.

I'm an open book.

I don't even plan how I'm going to do these sessions.

I don't know what I'm going to say.

I like to really go with the flow of what I'm sensing in the moment,

What people are saying in the chat.

And yeah,

Just intuition.

So feel free to say whatever you want.

Anyway,

Hope is a thumbs up.

Hope that's received well,

Guys.

Now when I talk about what is the subject for this session,

Why are you here?

I put the subject,

How to overcome confidence blocks for taking action.

And if you look at the sessions I create,

I'm fascinated by language.

So I choose these subjects with like a,

It excites me to use specific words.

How to overcome confidence blocks for taking action.

I'm going to break that down in this session.

Tell me guys,

What are your confidence blocks?

Let's start with that and then I'll start going into my flow and see how I can support you with that.

So what are some confidence blocks?

Just throw it in the chat.

What creates these blocks for confidence and for taking action?

You think of a great idea.

You know,

I've had this a lot and this has been my life.

I've had ideas or I've had a potential inside me and I just couldn't get it out.

I was like,

I want to do this,

But there's just this.

It was always for me taking action was the hardest because there was this underlying belief that I wasn't worth it or I'm not good enough or something.

There's all this stuff that was there.

So even if I had the best ideas,

I just wouldn't do it.

Even if I knew this is the thing I really want,

I couldn't get past something.

So tell me guys,

What comes up for you when I say confidence blocks for taking action?

What are those for you?

How did those show up?

So everyone is putting things in the chat.

I'm going to start reading those.

Feel free to keep throwing things in there guys.

This is the content that I'm going to use for today's session.

Like when I hear from you guys,

It's awesome.

So lots of self-doubt,

Dysfunctional family.

Huh?

Okay.

Interesting.

Okay.

I might come back to that.

I'm highly qualified for jobs,

But in confidence to complete my resume,

To jump into retirement for new opportunities.

Oh,

Okay.

Complete your resume.

Okay.

Interesting.

Yeah.

Thanks for sharing that.

Money blocks.

Tell me more about that.

And if you can expand on that,

Cause then I understand what you mean by that.

Cause yeah,

There's this I've had money blocks.

Everyone I've ever met ever has had some kind of thing about money,

Whatever that is.

Um,

So yeah,

Please share some more if you're,

If you want to,

If you're willing.

Fear of sounding stupid or just out there.

Huh?

And I saw earlier,

You mentioned something about,

Um,

Being afraid to raise your hand like me,

Just like me.

Yeah.

Okay.

Remaining silent is safer.

Hmm.

Over analysis,

Overthinking by default and then remembering to connect to my inner guide.

Okay.

Yeah.

Thanks for sharing these guys.

Okay.

There's some more feeling like I'm not good enough at work at any moment I could be found out.

Oh,

The imposter syndrome.

Someone was telling me about this earlier.

Actually it was,

Um,

It was my sister.

She was saying to me,

Yeah,

Like I don't really know what I'm doing,

But like she had this like imposter syndrome coming.

I don't really know what I'm doing.

I don't even know why they,

They still have me here.

Um,

Someone might find out that I'm not going to be able to do this.

And yeah,

She's,

She was like questioning and stuff.

Um,

Imposter syndrome.

Yeah.

It's a big one.

I hear it a lot,

Especially when someone wants to transition when they're in a transition phase,

Let's say like,

Um,

You want to start a new job or you want to go into different phase of your life,

Or you want to start a business.

Um,

There's a lot of this stuff that comes up around.

Who am I to do this?

I had it as well,

By the way.

And I'll talk about that in a second.

Um,

Okay.

What else?

Doubt comes when I questioned myself if I really should do what I wanted.

Ooh.

Okay.

Yeah.

Thanks for sharing that.

Finishing the last 10%.

Ooh.

That's a,

Yeah,

That's a big one.

Yeah.

Okay.

I get you.

Yeah.

So starting things and then not finishing the last 10%.

That's what I'm getting from you.

Okay.

Um,

You didn't think you had money blocks,

Uh,

Until yesterday.

Ooh.

Okay.

Interesting.

Yeah.

Thanks for sharing guys.

Lovely shares in there.

Really honest,

Really open.

It just,

It takes some vulnerability as they say,

You know,

Renee Brown says,

Vulnerability is a superpower.

It's a superpower to just say what's coming up instead of it being like this shameful thing that no one knows about that you try and hide from the world,

Which is what I was doing for a long time.

Trying to hide all my things,

Challenges from the world.

Oh no,

No,

I'm okay.

No,

No,

No.

I don't need your help.

No,

No,

No.

Get away from me.

That's what it was.

It was like,

I wouldn't be,

I found it very difficult to accept help or to,

To,

Um,

Show someone what was really happening.

Cause there was this whole thing about shame that was coming up for me.

Can anyone relate to shame?

Just me saying the word shame.

Does that bring up something in you?

Cause if it does,

If,

If,

If it's a yes,

Then instantly I know that you've,

You've looked into all this stuff.

So confidence blocks for taking action.

So what you guys have said so far is there's a lot of thinking going on.

There's a lot of doubt.

There's a lot of wanting something,

Whether that's an inner shift or that's an outer situation that you want to create,

Like someone said,

Um,

Retirement or job.

The first thing I'll say is,

Oh,

There's a few yeses on there about the shame thing.

Yeah.

Thanks for being honest.

Um,

Resume and LinkedIn procrastination.

Okay.

Yeah.

So the first thing I'll say is this stuff isn't real.

It's only what we believe.

And that's not like,

You're probably going to be like,

I know.

Uh,

Yeah,

Of course.

I know.

Um,

I want to highlight that.

I want to highlight that point.

Go back to the basics of it's not real until it's proven that it's real in reality.

It's only in our head.

We believe this.

So for me,

A bit of my background,

And I say this a lot,

But I shared little bits of my background in each session,

Um,

Was that I was scared of performance.

I avoided any kind of thing that related to performing or like people seeing me,

For example,

Speaking,

I had massive fears with speaking.

And it wasn't just that.

It was like,

If someone asked me a question,

I would feel tense and insecure.

Just a question.

It could be any question.

I felt like I was,

I had to,

I don't know.

I just felt I was on guard and I had to say something which sounded good.

Let's say,

Can you relate to that one?

Someone asked you a question and you feel this kind of pressure.

It feels some,

Some kind of pressure inside.

That's what I felt for a long time.

So why do I say that?

Because this whole thing of like,

How do we see ourselves,

Self-esteem they call it.

How do you see yourself underneath,

In the subconscious?

What is,

What's,

What's the story that's being told?

For me it was,

And I didn't know this for a long time.

I just thought I saw the surface level effects of,

Um,

I feel anxious in certain situations.

I said,

I have social anxiety.

That was,

That was my line for the longest time to myself.

Social anxiety.

And I have confidence issues.

That's what I said.

And I just accepted that.

I was like,

Yes,

This is just who I am.

I can't do these things.

I can't do that.

What's the story behind all that?

Why did I believe that?

Because there was this entrenched,

Entrenched psychological belief that if I speak,

I will be rejected.

I will be rejected.

And for me,

Rejection felt as scary as being killed.

That's,

That's what my body was saying anyway.

It was saying you're under danger.

There's a real threat.

Rejection a real threat.

So my whole body would go into fight or flight.

I would be like in pain because I'd be so fired up.

And then I'd have the extreme lows that come after it.

You know,

Adrenaline rushes.

After an adrenaline rush,

You feel exhausted.

Can anyone relate to having these kinds of experiences where you're like,

You feel panicked and you feel exhausted after.

And then,

And this added judgment of self of God,

This happened again.

And then just want to sit in bed,

Not seeing anyone in the world and then creating strategies of ways to never be in that situation again and never see anyone that's going to put you in that situation,

Avoiding people.

All of that was happening.

And people are saying,

Yes,

They can relate.

So maybe you're very similar to me.

So why do I say all this is to say,

There's a story that's running our lives.

It's a program.

There's a program there.

It's a voice.

The voice creates a reaction.

It's a chain reaction.

It's all connected to body and mind.

So they're both working together,

Right?

This is maybe,

Maybe you know this already,

But like I said at the beginning,

This is not an informational thing.

This is to see what insights occur and it can come at any time.

So look out for it.

The feeling of insight.

Anyway,

Mind and body is one and it's been proven psychosomatic.

They call it now.

They're one.

Then there's this other thing here where it's something else.

There's another mode where we're not really,

We're not really in the autopilot.

For example,

You go to a beautiful,

Beautiful place in nature.

You see some waterfalls.

You just,

You hear the birds chirping.

You see,

Or you go to a beach.

I don't know,

Something really nice for you.

What is that for you?

What is your place where you're out of your pattern of your mind?

What is that?

Put it in the chat.

For some it might be making music,

It might be singing.

It doesn't have to necessarily be a place you go to.

The state of being when you're not in the pattern of your default psychology,

Let's call it.

What is that for you?

What's the place that brings you there?

I'd love to hear in the chat.

In the chat someone's saying,

Speaking may cause rejection.

The most feared emotion or condition for me are because I reject myself at some level.

Yes,

That's,

Thanks for mentioning that.

That's what's going on.

There's this thought of,

I'm rejected.

I don't fit in.

So when you are in nature,

Like someone's put in the chat,

Gazing at a sunset,

The thought of I don't fit in is not running you in that moment.

Oh,

Here's an example I use a lot.

Here's a good one.

Let's say you're in a panic state and you're overthinking,

Oh my god I got this thing tomorrow.

And then let's say your friend comes over,

Surprises you and they have a baby.

Cute little,

Soft,

Cutest baby ever.

And you hold the baby and all your worries have disappeared.

You're dissolved in the beauty of this baby.

You're in a different state of being there.

You're dissolved into the beauty of life.

You throw a baby in front of you,

Where's your problems now?

So how can they be a permanent thing?

They're not.

How can it be an I am,

I have anxiety?

It's a thing that comes and goes based on what triggers that.

So anyway,

What has this got to do with taking action?

Confidence blocks.

What I've learnt is that this program that's running us,

It learns really well.

So it's not really an enemy,

It's a learning machine.

Let's say Raj is anxious about public speaking.

If I was to do something,

It's kind of related to that.

Say I had to,

For me I couldn't even speak on the phone because I would get nervous.

I couldn't have a meeting on the phone.

I'd get nervous on the phone.

Then I had this job where I had to speak on the phone.

I hated it because I was nervous about it.

Then as I started doing it more,

I started gaining confidence.

So what I've learnt is confidence is something that we earn as a result of courage.

It's not a requirement.

It's not a requirement.

So let's say you have self-doubt over being an entrepreneur or you have self-doubt about going into retirement.

Of course you would.

That's an okay thing to be happening.

Why do we want to work on getting rid of that?

That's okay.

It's natural because you don't understand what that would be like.

How can we have confidence?

It's like if I was trying to drive a car for the first time,

I didn't have confidence about driving a car.

Say I had a first girlfriend.

I didn't know what it's like to have a girlfriend.

Confidence gets earned.

As a result of doing something that might be uncomfortable,

It's a reward rather than something that's always required before.

And here's the saying that always comes up.

It wasn't as bad as I thought.

You know that one.

You do something and you're like it wasn't as bad as I thought.

Because the thinking is trying to avoid the danger,

It's trying to avoid the feelings.

Then we feed it and we say I'm going to feed you by doing what you say and avoiding it.

We feed the program rather than feeding the program new information.

The program is like an algorithm online.

Google ads and stuff.

You go on your phone and you search for brown chairs.

So Google now has information that you are looking for brown chairs.

You've never done that before.

So Google starts sending you ads and putting it everywhere.

So same with our mindworks.

We feed it things.

We feed it things.

So this is saying the obstacle is the way.

I think it was by Marcus Aurelius.

Stoic Obstacle is the way.

Obstacle is the way.

I had fears of public speaking for my whole life.

And it's funny because now I really like to speak.

Maybe the obstacle was the way for me for my whole life.

It was telling me Raj.

If you don't like this it's because you do like it.

For example let's say you want to go into your new job or start a business or someone said something about retiring.

You feel uncomfortable.

Great.

If you were not feeling uncomfortable I'd be worried.

I'd say is this what you really want?

If you were going for something that feels so big it's going to be discomfort.

That's the first thing I want to make.

First point I want to make in this call.

Taking action.

Sometimes we don't have to do inner work.

Sometimes we don't have to do inner work to take action.

Sometimes we can take action and that does the inner work for us.

Action is the inner work.

Rather than hey I got to meditate and I got to get myself prepared for this mentally.

I got to get rid of this fear.

I got to get rid of imposter syndrome.

I never tell anyone to get rid of imposter syndrome.

I say imposter syndrome is a sign that you're going for something that is slightly outside your comfort zone and something that is playing big enough.

I want to feel imposter syndrome all the time.

I want to feel it.

I want to feel a slight bit of it.

It tells me I'm doing something that is slightly exciting but scary.

That's the first thing I want to share on this call.

Confidence blocks.

Sometimes you don't have to do all of this inner work,

Spiritual work.

Sometimes it can be you do the action through the,

I call it with wet pants on.

You do it with wet pants.

I'll tell you what that means.

I don't know where I heard this but there was an army person I think in the US and he had a group of new cadets and he said to them,

You've got to jump off this cliff right now.

I don't know what it was exactly.

I might be messing the story up but you have to do something really scary.

He said to them,

Which of you is not scared?

None of them spoke up.

They were all like,

No we're not scared.

One guy put his hand up and he said,

Yeah I'm scared.

I'll do it with wet pants on.

What he means is I'll do it while I'm scared.

And the general was like,

They've all got wet pants on.

You're the only one that's admitting it.

So that saying stuck with me.

Do it with wet pants.

Yeah he peed his pants.

Exactly.

Peeing your pants.

It's okay sometimes.

It's okay to be.

You can do scared.

You can do scared.

We've done scared all of our life to some extent.

There's always been a little bit of scared.

We've just evolved to a point where we can avoid fear by using our thinking and creating situations where we avoid things.

I was avoiding anything that made me feel uncomfortable.

Then I never got free from it.

Ever.

It was uncomfortable for me to take a course about how to become a coach.

Very uncomfortable.

It's uncomfortable for me to take a course on how to become a mindfulness and meditation teacher.

Who am I to do that?

Imposter syndrome.

All of that stuff came up.

For me to actually say to a client for the first time,

This is how much it costs.

Or do you want to work with me?

You know all that.

All sorts of stuff came up.

Imposter syndrome.

Crazy mouse.

But there was no way for me to move past that by doing inner work.

The only way for me to move past that was I just got to do it.

Just got to do it and learn through the experience.

Confidence earned by taking action.

Confidence earned by taking action.

Rather than confidence beforehand.

Confidence beforehand sometimes you might have.

If you don't it's okay.

It's just a reaction going on inside.

It's okay.

It's normal.

Nothing is wrong.

That's the first part.

What action do you guys want to take?

Let's take a pause.

What is the action that you guys want to take?

What is the confident action you want to take?

Put something in the chat.

I'm going to write a book.

Because the last time I was here someone was here.

I don't know what his name was.

I think it was Scott.

He said Raj I'm going to write a book.

Within the call I got him to commit to writing his book.

He's doing it and he's messaging me.

He's going to message me soon in a few days telling me how his progress has gone.

He's been thinking about writing a book for years.

He said my action is I'm going to write this book Raj.

He decided right there on this call.

His life's changed now.

He's doing it.

So what is the action you guys want to take?

What is it?

Health?

Inner world?

Relationships?

What is the action that you want to take next?

I use this term share it to declare it.

Share it to declare it.

Put it in the chat.

If you want to.

I'm not trying to pressure anyone.

Only if you feel called inside.

Only if you feel called.

And if you do,

If you feel a little bit scared about typing it in the chat.

Oh my god I can't say this.

No no no.

That means I've got to commit.

Not if Raj comes and finds me and asks me if I did it or not.

All that stuff will come up.

I still challenge you.

What is the action you want to take?

Share it to declare it in the chat.

Share it to declare it in the chat.

I'll give you a chance to do that right now.

Because our words are powerful.

If we say something and we say it out loud in this format of putting it in the chat.

Yeah something might happen now.

Internally your mind might stop creating that.

Now you've decided to declare it.

I'm not going to chase you up.

This is for you.

This is for you.

I'm challenging you for you.

So put it in the chat if you wish.

Declare what you want to take action on.

Okay few people.

Contacting the people who have inquired on my coaching.

Oh nice.

Nice.

Yeah.

Do it.

Do it.

What are you waiting for?

What are you waiting for?

What are you waiting for?

What are you waiting for?

I want to find peace.

Awesome.

See that's great because if someone says I want to find peace I'll say okay let's make that happen.

I honestly honestly I see peace as a deliverable let's call it.

As something you can create.

You can actually create that.

It's not this thing that you say hey I want peace.

I wish I could have peace.

No I think you can actually take actions that are going to move you towards peace.

Whatever and the first thing is like what does peace mean to you?

I'll ask you right now what does peace mean to you?

How do you know you have peace?

That's what I'd ask someone if someone was going to work with me I'm in front of them.

What does it mean to you first?

And then we'll start making it happen.

I want to play the piano again.

Keep them coming guys this is good stuff.

I want to play the piano again.

I'm sitting down on the piano each day to practice.

Oh nice.

Yes so you're doing the practice already.

That's great you're taking action.

Awesome.

Is there a next level of action that you could take that might help you even further?

That's just something that comes up.

I'm not saying there is but it's just a question.

I will start playing with paints.

Oh nice I thought it said pants there.

Although that was a reference to my pants point earlier.

I make myself laugh.

Anyway I will start playing with paints again.

Nice.

This is interesting because I've got an art set right next to me.

I've not used it once.

But yeah interesting as you say that it reminds me of my art set.

Focus on one thing at a time.

Ooh okay.

How do you do that?

How do you focus on one thing at a time?

What I would say to someone is let's really define what that one priority is.

Because I love to work in that way sometimes as well.

One thing.

One focus.

Right now I'm lifting a lot of heavy weights.

I haven't done this in a while.

For years I used to actually I got into lifting weights because I was trying to escape my own mind.

That's how it started.

But I've started recently and I've just been focusing on it.

I've just been doing it with focus.

That's like with my health body let's say.

Then I've got one thing I'm focusing on with business.

One thing.

Just one.

For now.

For the next few months.

And then after that I'll see what I want to do next.

Then there's one thing I might focus on with building better relationships.

One thing with spirituality.

Whatever.

And once you keep on doing things towards that,

Keep on taking those actions.

Things change.

Wonderful.

So.

Ok cool.

What else?

How to deal with fear of change.

Ok great.

Nice.

Let me come back to that.

Fear of change.

So.

Sometimes people say to me.

Like there's this fear of the unknown.

The unknown.

Does anyone relate to the fear of the unknown?

Does that ever come up for you?

You know you want to let's say you want to start a new career or you want to move locations.

I don't know whatever.

And there's the fear of the unknown.

Fear of the future as well.

Yeah.

Exactly.

That could be related as well right?

Fear of the future.

Unknown.

We don't know it.

We don't know what's coming up.

Here's what I say.

I say.

It's unknowable.

It's more than unknown.

Because unknown feels like it's defined in a way.

It's like the term unknown we have a relationship to that.

Unknown.

Oh my god scary.

Unknown.

Oh like this means something.

Hmm.

Generally.

I'm not saying for everyone but generally there's this kind of like dark energy about unknown or about you know even the word like fear of future.

I change it and I say it's unknowable.

Like there's no way for you to know it.

It's like we use the term unknown because we're trying to figure it out to some level.

You know fear of unknown is like almost like saying I want to know.

That's why it's a fear because I want to know.

It's a fear because I'm trying to figure out what might happen.

It's a non-acceptance of the unknowable.

If it was like I'm going into the unknown and I accept that.

It's a whole different ballgame to fear of unknown because fear of unknown is assuming it's an assumption that there's something there if you get what I mean.

It's an assumption that there's something to be scared of so it's not really unknown anymore.

There's something to be scared of.

It's a projection because if there's a fear we're projecting what might happen in the future.

We're projecting what might be.

So it's not even the term unknown anymore.

It's not fear of unknown it's fear of what I think might happen.

This was really going on underneath.

If it was a unknowable an acceptance of the unknown then you become present.

You become here and you say I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow.

It's unknown.

It does make me uncomfortable slightly.

I'm not trying to figure it out in any way because I don't know.

I'm accepting that it's really unknown.

It's truly unknown.

So what I would say if you're asking me advice on this I would say act of acceptance.

With change as well.

You said fear of change.

I'd say acceptance of the unknowable.

And then secondly I'd say that's almost the yin approach.

I like to use a lot of yin and yang.

That's almost the yin way.

But then the yang I would say okay what can you do to the best of your ability to prepare for this change?

How can you be at your best right now in preparation for this change that's happening?

Not how can you avoid danger but I'm talking in an empowered way.

How can you be at your best with this unknown that's about to occur?

What's the best I can do?

Simply.

I ask that question a lot.

What's the best I can do?

Okay let's say I wanted to leave my location and I'm going into a different location.

I'm starting a new job.

What's the best I can do about that?

Okay I can prepare enough income.

I can have a good relationship with people right here and say goodbye to them in a nice way.

I can start to meet people in the place that I want to go to online.

How can I best prepare for this?

How can I best prepare for this?

So I guess the point I'm trying to say you know like even for this whole session overcoming confidence blocks.

I'll always encourage someone to go into their most empowered way of looking at things.

What's in your power?

What's not?

You can take action that's in your power but you cannot control or have something a certain way because that is just not in your power.

Certain things are just not in your power you know so I employ the act of surrendering letting go yin as well as the act of doing stuff yang.

The same time both of those I'm not about like well let's just say I'm about both of those approaches I'm about intuitiveness letting go presence as well as let's do our best let's go for it.

Both at the same time where they almost become one you're in a state of action without attachment action without mental analysis how cool is that?

So that's what I'd encourage you to do with change coming up.

Now I went a bit long on that one but you see when I get into my flow let's call it and some stuff comes out.

Was that useful anyone?

Put something in the chat did you get anything from that?

Did any insight occur?

Let me know.

Figuring out how you were just in another country yeah how can you figure that out?

How?

How will you know until you get there?

And again there's two ways of looking at it like I said yin and yang.

How will you know like you can let go of that you don't need to figure out and then number two is yeah you can you can start doing empowered things towards that oh I can start connecting with people taking language classes like you said there you go you're in preparation.

You see how powerful this is you can take action without being attached to the things your mind says to you that's really what I'm trying to say you can take action you can go for things and really that's where confidence blocks break down.

The blocks start dissolving slightly.

Blocks start dissolving slightly because you're taking action whilst not being attached to what you think might happen.

And there's a quote in the Bhagavad Gita I don't know if anyone's read the Bhagavad Gita and I don't remember the exact quote but let's say Krishna said do not think about the fruits of your actions do not think about the fruits of your actions and really like it's beyond there's a deeper meaning to that for me it's to stay detached from what my mind is trying to tell me my mind desires and wants to happen from a place of insecurity.

And just take action do stuff and even and here's the other thing like even inaction is actually an action deciding not to take action is also an action deciding which things you don't take action on saying no to things that's also an action to me saying no to things deciding it's all for me is all about empowerment.

So I've said a lot of things guys you're going to pause there and let me know what you've got from this session put in the chat what have you got from this any insight occur anything you're taking away from it spent an hour here I hope you've taken something away a way of seeing things any insights like I said before it's not I'm not here to give you tell you what to do it's rather to say save stuff and then encourage what might come up inside you know just as just as the Buddha would have said in the same way he said don't listen to anything I say or he said well basically said something along the lines of you don't have to worry about the words I'm saying I'm not trying to make you into a copy instead notice what arises in you when you hear the words I say what arises in your Buddha nature when you hear the words I say that's how I like to do it as well here to look like an look like a genius made to move myself out of the way say things and then yeah what comes up for you tell me in the chat what you're taking away from this and we'll close it there I'll end with a short meditation I'm glad you're getting some insights from the Bhagavad Gita nice powerful book if you look at it as a life lesson book rather than looking at it on the surface of being a story if you take things from it it's really powerful yeah the thing you mentioned is I'm needing to understand and figure out yes it's an addiction we have and they say it like it's a good thing we like to understand things but you know when that turns against us it can turn against us sometimes you know so it's knowing when to use that tool okay you're taking wet pants away yeah good nice one I don't think I've seen you before nice to see you here to see you again do it with wet pants a van gogh painting by number for almost a year took it out of the box nice go for it do it yeah small steps small steps is a good one like that that's the other thing that comes up and I didn't mention that let me just mention that real quick that's the other thing that comes up for us we make things into such a big deal I do this as well I do this as well if I wanted to start something it feels overwhelming at first these small steps tiniest steps I say I say to people tiniest steps what is the one thing the easiest thing where there's no way you can get out of this and say it's too much and just do that if someone wants to write a book I'll say to them okay write for 15 minutes that's all each day most likely they'll get inspired and I'll write for longer but just set a goal of 15 minutes you're done you can do that can't you and they say yeah you want to meditate more meditate for five minutes a day okay I spend five minutes making a tea I spend five minutes meditating yeah of course so I think it's all about commitment to the process small actions and then the thought of ah this is overwhelming or I can't do this that disappears it's like we're going under the radar of our amygdala which is the fear response anyway guys I'm gonna leave it as that what else is coming okay yeah reflect I suggest everyone to reflect if you've been here and you've been listening and you've been interested yeah just reflect what did what did you take from this time time is precious what did you take from it what was your your takeaway think about that just get a piece of paper right now spend three minutes what did I take away from this what do I want to know more about just explore and I always tell people send me a message come and come into my space connect with me if there's something that you want to work on something that has been coming up for a while just send me a message I'll definitely be able to help you like whatever it is whatever it is just feel free to send me a message send your resource I'll send you a voice note whatever and some way to help and there's like a bunch of articles I've written that there's there's one I wrote where I was talking about getting chased by a bear it's called them five ways to challenge overthinking I talk about how to use the body how to use certain practices so if anyone wants that just message me if you want anything else just message me that's my invitation to you guys what else let me just check the comments oh my website is with Raj.

Com with Raj.

Com there's a bunch of free resources on there if you like what you heard today there's a bunch of stuff there's articles there's yeah videos there's all sorts of stuff check it out and I make videos on Instagram every day I'm just here with my phone shooting what I'm doing today what did I learn today what did I learn what's been my insight for today I put down my Instagram page so you can check it out it's Raj Garcia Instagram cool guys the last question was do you have any last moment advice on leaning into working towards detachment particularly in the midst of great difficulties oh okay it depends what great difficulties you're having that's what I'll say it's a it depends answer and I don't have a generic answer for that but the only thing I'll say is bringing body and mind into alignment can be useful breath is a tool for that so if you're in the midst of something sometimes just spending a few minutes slowing your breath down or just listening to your breath it can do wonders because it's a nervous system response sometimes you know um so it depends what you mean by great difficulties it depends what that actually means and yeah it so it's one of those answers I'm not sure I can answer straight up but that's what comes up for me but yeah like feel free to drop me a message if you want to share more about that privately then yeah go for it and I'll I'll be able to help you more cool guys we're done but before we finish quick meditation to settle down meditation to settle down absorb slow down before you rush into your day before you rush into your day so keep your eyes open or closed you choose you choose and just listen to your breath just come back to that stomach that is moving on its own you don't need to do anything here you don't need to control the breath the breath is doing this while you sleep it's breathing while you're eating just watch it just watch the breath as if you are so amazed so amazed that this thing is happening through you you don't need to do anything it just does this breathing thing belly goes in and out comes into your body and then it just goes out so start to feel into your your power confidence that you've earned through your life in some way or another think of something you've done where you had to be courageous and you became wiser as a result give yourself some acknowledgement some kindness some love give yourself some support some praise doing the best you can in your life and give yourself some support knowing you can do anything can you cheer yourself on very all open your eyes okay guys love you all sending you some of my energy some of my empowerment see if you can receive it so you can receive it see if you can take it in and notice how you feel I'll see you later guys tomorrow I've got a session as well it's a two-part series almost although these sessions are independent but tomorrow is about slowing down to let go of searching running and pressure so I'm really going to talk about the I'm really going to talk about the inner deeper spiritual process I'm really going to go into Zen really really go into like letting go letting go compassion unlocking that heart today was a bit more about action a little bit more tomorrow is going to be about being so if you want come along and yeah we're done alright see you later

Reviews

Really great Raj, thank you!