Creating The Life You Want Versus Chasing Temporary Highs

I ran this session because i spent a lot of my life chasing a high. And when i got that high, i wasn't satisfied. We live in a world of easy instant gratification, we can throw money or energy at cheap thrills.
I realised that we don't really care about any of this, we only care about having a life that makes us deeply content inside. This session talks about that. If you found this session useful, please message me and tell me how or why, i want to hear from you. Enjoy, love you. Raj

Transcript

I call this session creating the life you want vs chasing temporary highs.

So what that means for me is when you're creating the life you want,

You're really stepping into this leadership role for your own life.

You're saying I'm going to lead my life rather than my life being led by my mind and its routine and its habits and cravings.

That's why I put at the end creating the life you want vs chasing temporary highs.

I name all of these events specifically because you could maybe call me a wordsmith.

I'm very interested in how we use words,

How we use language,

How we create our worlds through the words we use as well.

Really important because we're creating everything through the way we speak to ourselves and to others.

The language that's going on,

The energy that's going on.

So that's why I call this creating the life you want vs chasing temporary highs.

So you really have that distinction between the two.

So I'm going to ask you in a moment to share what is the life you want?

And while you have a little ponder on that,

A little think,

I want to talk about chasing temporary highs.

I'm going to tell you a bit about my endeavors or stories chasing highs.

I've chased highs all my life.

You know when you feel that low,

It's like I've got to counterbalance it with something.

I need to feel that buzz again.

I need to feel vibrant again.

Where's it gone?

And then that means the low becomes even more powerful.

Because it's like the contrast effect is in play.

It's like me saying,

Oh my god,

Right now let's say I was overweight.

Oh my god,

I'm overweight.

I really want to get back to getting in good shape again.

So I'm kind of beating myself up in a sense.

Because I'm craving something that feels like it's something I don't have right now.

So I want that fight.

And there's really good intention that could be possible from this.

But if it's from that frame of self-loathing and oh I'm here and it's low and I'm desperate,

Desperate for it to change,

Then what can occur sometimes,

I know it happened for me,

Was this depression,

These depressive episodes of just bathing in my own misery.

So I'd be looking,

How do I get the high back?

Oh I know,

Let me go out on Friday and drink a lot of alcohol with my friends and go party.

That's a high.

That would make my life feel like I've got some highs in it.

There's nothing wrong with that.

Having fun is okay,

But if it's from that place of I'm missing something so I've got to go get something,

The chasing of the highs just never ends.

When does it end?

If in the high I feel complete and any time I'm not in the high I feel miserable,

Then it means I'm just going to be chasing that all the time.

This is why I think drug abuse occurs and alcohol abuse and sex addictions,

I need to chase the buzz of a mate to make me feel something.

And maybe not even like sex,

Maybe it's like I just need someone with me,

I need a person because then I'll feel okay.

And again,

I'm not saying there's anything wrong with having people with you,

But it's chasing.

When it's like I'm lacking something so I need to get something to feel complete,

It's never going to happen.

Because if you're not feeling complete without that thing,

It's like there's so much weight to put on and so much pressure on,

I need this thing.

And this can come in many forms like money,

Even things like when people take certain healthy things too seriously,

Like chasing to beat their running time from last time.

I need to beat my time,

If I don't I feel bad.

And again,

You see what I'm saying here,

I'm not saying any of this stuff is bad,

But it can become this chasing of a high.

Chasing chasing,

I need a buzz,

I need a buzz,

I need to feel something,

I want to feel something,

That's what it is.

Chasing the feelings.

Feelings are just temporary though,

Because once it's gone then what?

Oh,

I'm going to have to chase it again.

It's a bottomless pit.

Did anyone relate to this?

Was anyone like me and when you feel low you're looking for a buzz in any form?

It could be anything,

It could be like,

Hey I need to drink some coffee,

Because I need it.

And that might sound extreme,

But it can get to that extreme,

Where it's like this is my pie,

Where it becomes a necessity to function.

Chasing coffee,

Alcohol,

Relationships or money,

Travel even.

I've done a lot of this,

I've been like,

I need a break,

I need a break,

I need a break,

Because I thought if I don't have this break I don't feel satisfied.

And I love to travel,

I'm already planning another trip,

I'm already planning another trip,

But it's not from this place of like,

I'm desperate.

Instead it's just,

This would be fun,

Oh okay cool,

Let's go do it.

I'm okay as I am,

But this would be fun.

So I guess that's the frame I want to start with on this call.

And for people who are saying yes and engaging in the chat,

Yeah,

Well done for putting your hand up,

Because like they say in AA,

Admitting is the first step,

Right?

It did admit to myself,

I was like,

Oh my god,

I'm just looking for highs all day long.

And when I don't feel it,

I'm just like,

I feel bored,

Or I don't know,

Just something just doesn't feel right.

So that's how I want to start the session.

I want to continue to ask,

What is the life you really want?

Because I noticed I was chasing a high often to avoid something,

Or the distraction.

If I have a lot of,

Let's say I wanted to start a project,

Or let's say I wanted to start a business like I did,

I was distracting myself for ages,

Trying to push the thoughts away and then saying,

Oh no,

All this self-doubt came up.

So I'd just do other stuff to chase a high instead.

But the life I wanted was,

I want to create this thing where I can do what I'm good at.

I was avoiding it.

I was going for the highs instead.

What I'm really talking about is that potential inside you.

You know that potential that's living there,

That just wanting to burst out.

That's what I mean when I'm saying creating the life you want.

The potential,

That vision that you might see for yourself.

Possibilities that you know could happen.

Could happen.

So I want to engage with you right now.

And I love engaging with you guys.

Because I'm not a motivational speaker.

I'm a change maker.

I'm not here just to speak.

I'm here to really engage with you.

And for you to participate in your own creation of your new life.

So I want to ask you to share in the chat.

What is the life that you want?

And if you share it,

You declare it.

That's one of my phrases.

That just came up when I was doing one of these sessions.

I was like,

That rhymes.

That's cool.

So if you share it,

You declare it.

You speak it into the world.

You're speaking it into existence.

Like I mentioned earlier,

The power of our words and our language.

And getting it out of your head and into a live chat is powerful.

I promise you.

There's been people who've done this.

And they messaged me after saying,

Oh my god,

Raj.

Like yeah,

I've got this so many insights happening.

And I'm going to make a plan.

And then things are just showing up in their lives.

Because they've just declared it in the chat.

So what is the life you want?

What is the life you want?

Even if it sounds difficult,

Impossible even,

What is it?

It's a game,

You know?

It doesn't have to be taken so seriously at this stage.

It's a game.

That's how I like to play.

Whenever I'm coaching someone,

I like to get into that playful mood.

Let's play.

Let's play like children with crayons who are like drawing their dream castle with pink and orange and yellows.

Let's play.

Play and declare what is it you want your life to be.

It doesn't matter if you,

You don't have to figure out how to get there right now.

Just play.

Throw it in the chat.

See what comes up.

And I'm going to speak on those.

Creating the life you want.

Because our words are creation itself.

Like using our words,

Saying this is what I want.

Our brain starts doing all this clever stuff in the background and it starts almost like working for us now rather than against us.

Because you know,

For example,

Here's an example.

Whenever I'm speaking to someone,

Often,

I'm not saying every time,

But often they will say to me,

Sorry,

Let me start again.

I'll say,

What do you want?

Just like I said to you.

And they'll often say to me,

I don't want to be overthinking.

I don't want to be worried about putting myself out there.

And they'll start with the I don't want.

So then what does your brain do?

It will start looking at the don't.

It will say,

It will just focus on that.

It's not seeing possibilities now.

It's seeing fear.

It's seeing survival,

Defensiveness.

It's seeing worry.

It's seeing protect me.

It's not expanding.

It's contracting.

When is an I don't want?

When is a I want to be free?

You know,

You even feel that in your body.

I want to be free.

A lot of people will come to me.

In some shape or form,

They want to be free.

I was trying to like,

Play with like,

What do I represent?

And it's free freedom.

Freedom from the mind.

Freedom financially freedom in location freedom from freedom to love more.

So when you say I want,

You say the life you want,

You declare it,

Your brain starts figuring out like,

Ah,

Solutions.

How will I do that?

How will I do that?

If you're in that playful state?

Ah,

Hmm.

How could that happen?

Even if you don't consciously hear it,

It's doing something in the background.

Because you've given it a command.

That's sometimes how it works.

It's a computer.

You've given it a command.

And here's why I say that,

Because when you're in distress,

Your brain will start worrying so much,

Right?

It is,

Of course,

Like it happens to me,

Happens to everyone.

This is how I lived my life.

I was living in like avoidance of fear,

Avoidance of danger.

So I'd walk into a situation,

Because I had a lot of social anxiety,

Walk into a situation and my mind will be figuring out,

It will be figuring out how to avoid the danger.

So it's a smart machine.

It's doing something there.

So if you give it the opposite command,

Which is what do you want?

What do you want?

It will do something in the background.

And then if your body's involved in that,

If you start feeling the energy of that,

You're in a whole different frame.

You're in the art of possibility,

I call it.

You're engaging your creative brain now.

Like I said,

Playfulness,

Getting the crayons out,

The kid with the crayons,

Very different from straight up logical thinking.

Electrical thinking is trying to look for,

It's like very much based on the information we have.

Creative thinking is like,

New possibilities can occur.

Expansion.

So I want to check in,

I'm going to read out the wants that you guys have and I'm going to speak on them quickly.

And here's another thing I want you to look out for.

During this whole time we have together,

It's almost like if you're really here,

It will feel like we're going into this space where time doesn't exist.

That's what might occur.

And what I want you to look out for is when you have an insight.

How would I describe an insight?

I would describe it as this soft energy that's moving through you,

Where you're literally feeling expanded,

You literally feel open.

It's like life is going one way and an insight hits and it's like your eyes open to possibility.

You see things slightly differently.

So look out for that during this whole session,

Look out,

See if you notice any shift inside you.

See if you smile or you relax a bit or you start getting excited or your eyes start looking upwards.

It's the signs of an insight occurring.

And any time an insight occurs for anyone here,

I'd love if you put it in the chat.

Put insight colon and then what your insight was.

Again,

Share it to declare it,

Engage yourself because that's where you're going to get the most out of this.

So there's a bit of context.

That's how I like to play.

This is how I play with my one to one clients as well.

I set up this way of being because if your way of being right now is in that frame of I'm okay,

He said look out for insight.

Okay,

Great.

Look out for insights.

Oh,

He said,

Let's engage in the chat,

Share it to declare.

Okay,

Cool.

Let's do that.

Then it means like the hour of time we have together starts multiplying in effect.

It's like you can listen to this whole thing and you can get something nothing from it.

Or you can listen in a different way and you get something from it.

So that's the invitation from me.

Ah,

All right.

I'm in a flow guys.

I want to go I'm going to go into the comment section.

Thank you everyone for sharing.

I love your curiosity today.

Curiosity is another creative aspect.

It's like when we're curious,

We're thinking in a way that is not based on every everything we know.

You know,

The unknown is where potential lies.

Using all the stuff we know.

That's one level of intelligence.

Yeah,

It's useful.

The newer and not newer,

The higher level of intelligence is when you're using the stuff you don't know you're tapping into that.

You're turning the the the you're turning space into light.

Let's call it you're turning the nothingness into something.

And that's how I that's how the universe was formed.

That's how we are formed.

Nothing into something.

So let me slow down and look through the comments.

I'm getting excited as you can see.

All right guys.

So if you haven't already,

I'm going to start reading some of these out.

If you haven't already shared it to declare it and do it now because I'm going to I'm going to read these out.

And even when I'm reading it,

I'm helping you create it just by just by reiterating this back to you.

So share it to declare it and something's going to happen and whatever you want is going to get created.

Creating the life you want.

Put it in the chat if you haven't done already.

Okay,

I want to start with.

Able to handle the unknown.

I love that able to handle the unknown.

Yeah that's a beautiful thing.

I think you can handle the unknown because you've done it all your life in some way or another.

To check in with yourself.

What if you already can handle the unknown?

What does that mean to you if you were able to handle the unknown?

How is that defined?

That's my invitation to you.

Next one.

I want a financially prosperous life free of all addictions and radiant health.

Hmm.

How will you do that?

What's a fun idea?

You know,

It's not a when I say that sometimes people get like the fight or flight response kicks in.

I know it did for me when people would challenge me and say how you going to do that?

I'd be like I'll curl up into a little scared ball and I'd be like oh my God no and I'll freak out.

So when I say how will you do that?

How will you become financially prosperous and have radiant health?

I'm asking you to tap into your creativity.

What's a creative way for you to do that?

Indoor on that for a moment and if you have an answer share it in the chat.

Okay next.

I want to on a life of continuous growth,

Genuine community,

Abundance,

Being of service,

Adventure and love.

Oh,

Okay.

Hmm.

What's stopping you?

That's my question to you.

That's a question I'll ask someone sometimes if I'm on a call with someone I'll just say what's stopping you and get a piece of paper and write it down.

What's stopping you?

Survive suffering with cotton candy.

Survive.

What's the best way for you to do that?

What's the best way for you to do that?

Knowing you've done your best and that's been powerful for me.

Knowing I'm doing my best is enough because if there's nothing else I can do the rest is a surrender experiment as Michael Singer might say.

Surrender experiment.

Nothing else I can do now I've done my best.

And often I know I used to beat myself up because I wasn't doing my best.

I knew there was things I could do.

So then my mind would kick in.

So what's the best you can do?

Any of you guys here what's the best you can do to create your life?

Then you've got a baseline.

There's more there's more for sure.

More will develop but then you've got a baseline.

Life I want for myself includes living on a big property mountains or ocean with four or five German shepherds lots of family and friends.

Awesome that sounds exciting.

It sounds like you really got into a creative zone on that one.

Really like I'm with you I can feel that and see all of that going on I can see the the dogs.

How far away are you from that?

I'd suggest get a piece of paper.

Right here I am now this is where I want to get to just get it like a little estimate how far away am I from that?

To be fulfilled successful and healthy.

What's the defining parameters for successful and fulfillment and healthy?

That's a question sometimes I'll ask a client.

I'll say okay cool like what does that mean to you?

If you had that how would you know?

If you had that how would you know?

That's a really good question that I ask someone.

Because otherwise things can get lost in the vagueness when it's undefined.

When it's like I'm healthy I'm successful.

Yeah let's define that let's nail that down what does that mean?

And of course this will I'm not trying to fix people into place I'm saying this is a direction we're moving towards then.

Now we know what this means at least.

So it's not lost in vagueness or what is fulfillment?

What does it mean?

At least we have a little bit of an anchor now.

And it will develop it will evolve as you evolve for sure.

Sharing and growing in freedom from any bondage of self.

Oh interesting that's a deeper one.

Any bondage freedom from any bondage of yourself yeah powerful.

What comes up for me when I see that is what is self?

What is self?

That's a deep question but that's the one I want to send to you.

What is self?

It seems like you'd be able to engage with that one.

So I'd love to hear what comes up for you.

What do you want?

Seems a heart question rather than mind.

What do you want?

Yeah what do you want?

Yeah it's just like what do you want and the tone I'm delivering it in that's this is how I'll talk to someone.

I'm not like what do you want?

I'm being playful I want to I want to make this fun because then it then it goes underneath the radar of the amygdala of the fear response that occurs or the judgment that someone might feel you know.

This is how I engage with someone when I'm with them.

I'm really on their team.

I really want them to get this.

There's love coming from me you know.

I want them to be full of love as well.

I want all of you here to be full of love.

When you're creating the life you want I want it to be led by love because if it's led by love rather than fear it starts becoming an enjoyable game that you're engaging with.

I'm not saying this is easy by the way.

I'm not saying hey click my fingers and you're loving you're making things happen everything is perfect but it's the direction I'm pointing you towards rather than the direction of like I'm looking this way.

I want to I want to show you let's look this way.

What else?

Odds folk let there be light and there was light everything was brought into existence with a word.

Yeah this goes deep this goes deep I might even do a session on language because I'm so fascinated by it.

You know like you know the chakras right I'm not going to go so deep on this because there's a I think I've got a session that I recorded called the chakras made simple if you want to look for that one but when the words are spoken and they're coming from inside the energy it's literally energy moving through your body and then coming roaring out your throat spilling out almost so it's like the energy inside is being expressed and when like people people used to say to me Raj did your voice change when you went down this process or this spiritual part let's call it and I said I don't know if it changed but it's become much more effortless now.

I don't plan these sessions.

I don't know what I'm going to say it's just coming out the way I'm speaking the tone I'm using the speed all of it just feels like it's an expression of the energy inside.

So when we speak these words like that in that way isn't it as a whole body experience when it's really coming from within then yeah we we can really create our reality when it's like we're using our thinking to speak when we're thinking about what shall I say how shall I sound clever how you know when it's too heady you'll notice like the way you're speaking is slightly different it won't feel like your true absolute fullest voice it will feel like almost like you're you're like I find this sometimes I'm because I'm going to tell you I'm not perfect I find this sometimes I'll say something but it won't be my word it will come from like some some some way I've heard someone else speak I'll literally hear it in real time and I'll be like wait where the hell is that coming from that feels different something feels different and it'll be either the words from my childhood the patterns in our mind their beliefs or it will be someone that said something smart and I'm just replicating it and again there's nothing wrong with this there's nothing wrong with this but I'm just trying to make you aware like how how the words work anyway I'm going on a tangent on this one words connected with energy create your reality read the world the life you want okay what else have we got in here anyone else declared this I get stuck in the curiosity then end up with a backlog of insights ha that's a good thing I think it's just about sifting through them and almost almost condensing it into what is the what is the fundamental insight that I'm getting from this really slow it down what is the insight and what is the action that needs to occur I want to talk about action in a moment as well okay what else I'm creating I'm desiring an online business that I can take with me anywhere oh yeah we should have a conversation that's exactly what I wanted it's exactly what I wanted I used to travel and see people with their laptops and they're like I'm doing an online business and I'm like how do you do this and it just fascinated me for years and then I eventually said oh well I want to do this I can do this it wasn't that like straightforward I was thinking a lot of thinking going on of course a lot of thinking a lot of doubting a lot of worries a lot of analyzing tons of that if that's what you want then send me a message and I can tell you more about my journey and we can have a chat if you want and you can get some clarity that's my invitation to anyone here anyone is going through a transition or anyone is going through a place where you're like thinking about your next steps whatever is happening send me a message and we can have a chat and I've also got some resources that I keep private that I send to people sometimes so I can send you some of those all right what else okay here's an answer self is based in ego oh okay yeah exactly it here's a really awesome um analogy that I've been like loving recently the waves in the ocean they all look different they're not all exactly the same they come and they go we are like the waves when we're looking at ourselves self versus other we're different waves in the ocean right different sizes and shapes but we also have to realize we're actually a part of the ocean we're still connected to the ocean and we crash and we become the ocean we are the ocean but we're also living this experience of separate separateness so neither is you know it's it's like we're definitely all one that's that's true but we're living in an experience where we have to navigate the world of separateness it took me a long time to really get into this because I went into like deep spirituality let's call it and I was all about oneness no we are not separate um all of that all of the depth of it let's say I was I was in that inner world like forever then I said I got to this next stage where I was like actually yeah I'm living this separate existence as well and it's okay I can be both at once there's no either or there's no oh we are all one or we are separate it's both at the same time and it's that's fine it's just knowing like how they how they both work to the like deepest degree and then the ego doesn't become an issue anymore because we know what it's doing anyway that's another side side thing I wanted to go down on okay let me see if there's anything else anything else you guys want to create how does it feel to really lay this out how does it feel to listen to my words as I'm speaking about all of these guys is anyone having any insight so far someone just said I started my own art business nice yeah well done well done even like here's the thing even if you've got a full-time job having something on the side is a really cool thing to do really cool just knowing that your creative energy can make something that you like and it can start generating income from it that's pretty cool right I think that's pretty cool it's a it's an art in itself is your art being expressed into the outer world so let me see what else there is a stone kitchen looking over an ocean bay your restaurant on the left oh nice just very creative I can sense that you're getting into the zone with that one yeah I'm seeing I'm feeling it laughter fills the room nice so here's the next step guys now I've got taken you through the first part we can call it if we can call it parts the first part is you have gone into a different state of being you have really experienced and felt this everyone that shared in the chat they felt what this life is that you want to create you felt it you've experienced it you know when you are doing art when you when you've got colors you're experiencing it it's really happening you feel it through your whole body right it's a whole body experience is a visualization is a seeing is a feeling awesome and this is where a lot of like manifestation will talk about right you know how popular that is these days it'll be like go and feel it go and see it what will it be do affirmations awesome that's that's the part we've just done and tell me how that feels in the chat if anyone wants to share how does it feel to really go into that visualization that creativity because like seriously are are um the the waves that our brains operating at are different when we're in this place we're not being led by what if and analysis it's different it's seeing and feeling is a much calmer energy to that playful like i said so remember remember this feeling anytime you want that's the first part guys yeah you're feeling vibrations good anyone else feeling vibrations i am for sure i love this vibe so that's the first part guys well done you've created the life you want you feel it you see it second part is let's play let's play in the real world let's go and do stuff this is sometimes where manifestation doesn't talk about they they they talk about all of the visualized the inner world i play both sides that's how i play this game i want to play inside i want to feel it i want to experience it i want to play the world of creation on the outside as well i want to take some actions i call it the game of life i call it the game of life i'm there to play a game and this is so important actually i wrote an insight about this today for myself i was deepening my experience of this and i said to myself let me see if i can find it actually i got this special journal that i write in which no one ever sees but i'm gonna see if i can find a bit of it um i realize that no let me start again i realize what the game of life really is it's just a game that is fun and it's fun to play this game it's the essence of who i am free playful and expressive it doesn't matter about the achievement as such as playing being in that frame where i am taking action taking action knowing full well that this is a game doing full well that i am okay regardless i am okay regardless it's like when a player plays a game they go on the field they give it their all they will take some risks they will they will shoot the shots try their best and then they'll come off the field if i play that way then scarcity and overthinking mind will be overridden so that's what i wanted to share with you guys that's from my secret journal so what comes up for you as you read as you head hear me read that please share in the chat if any insights appeared for you it's not about me none of this is about me it's about me showing you yourself really just really my role people sometimes ask me what do you do raj how do you describe what you do i'll say my responsibility is to show you who you really are to show you your potential i'm guiding you towards that i'm not telling anyone to be like me i find it hard to be me i want to show you to be you that's what i'm here to do guys so if you get any insights for yourself put something in the chat and i'll talk about this more in a moment so outer action let's take an example i'm going to take an example and i'm not going to i'm not doing this to pick on anyone i'm just going to pick an example just intuitively um okay let's say let's let's choose the health thing first let's start with that let's keep it as the health thing so i want to be healthy i want to create a life where i'm healthy okay awesome you're vibrating in that way you're seeing it you're seeing yourself be healthy like i said part one part two is what does it take and also actually let me go back to part one some of part one is a is is a little bit of an analytical game of what does it mean to be healthy how do you define the metric what is the requirement there and this is where some of my like consulting background comes in as spiritual as i am i have a lot of consulting background as well what is the requirement what are we trying to meet here okay cool we've defined what health is let's say health is you're you're in this shape that you want to be in and you're feeling energetic um i don't know what else let's just let's just use that for now okay now what is stopping you from that oh i'm eating these foods and i know they don't feel good okay what are we going to do about that how are you going to take action on this you know you're not exercising okay how are you going to take action on this what are you going to commit to and again like this commitment doesn't come from a heady place it's a real heart-centered commitment like when i when i'm with someone and i'm coaching them one-to-one and i ask them to make a commitment i'm asking them to the level of this is happening no matter what if someone says to me they're committed and they break that bond of their word they know how powerful that is to break their own bond so i'm asking for the deepest level of commitment here and i'm not saying hey you got to be a super health person straight away it's like how can we start this process what are you going to commit to to start with okay raj i'm committing to running twice a week and i'm committed to throwing away all the food that is not nutritious i'm going to do it today i'm going to send you a photo some people some people do that with me i'll tell them i'll say send me a photo show me that you've done this and again this is not to be a hierarchy or to be like one of those people who are like uh like trying to invade people's lives it's just so they keep the commitment send me a photo of you doing this tell me you've done this show me show yourself really awesome that bit's done great what's the next level from this oh well i think um i gotta cook my own food more because i keep ordering food outside okay how about we start with you cook one meal a week for yourself can you do that will you commit to this to your word yes okay it's done and if there's a breaking of commitment i'll have a talk with someone i'll say what why did this break why did you break your word what happened with love rather than judgment oh well like this happened okay how can we make your commitment um stronger next time let's do this great so that's one example if you want to be in good health if you want your life to be healthy this is this will happen it's just making it happen through your commitment and actions let me go to another example just to give you some examples of how i would work with this right how it helped you work with this really okay let's say someone wants to um let's go to let's go to a deeper one let's say that you are let's see all right let's say the one where someone wrote where they gone lost it oh okay growing in freedom freedom from any bondage to the self okay all right so we would talk about this what does bondage to the self mean what is what how does that come up someone might say okay well i'm i'm unable to express myself fully to others i find it really hard to have deeper conversations or tell people that how i feel about them let's say we'll work on that on the inside you can work on that on the inside what is it that creates that what's the tension you know you might get a therapist who might help you with a lot of this i'll do some of this as well i'll look at like what's really happening with your mind and your spirit and then we might say well how about we play the game how about this week you i've done this with a client just recently actually i said to her okay you want to be more connected and you feel like you're not expressing your your truth to your friends i said to her we were doing a all-day session that day actually and i said in the break i said call your friend up right now not in front of me but go call her in the break are you are you willing to do that how does that feel for you do you want to do that and she's like oh my god that's so scary but yes so we we resolved that right there and then something that felt sticky between the relationship we we made it happen through like controlled pressure let's call it i wasn't pressuring her i asked her do you want to do this she said yeah scary but yeah she knew i was there supporting her cheering her on you know that's that's some of the problems we have is we feel like we're alone we feel like there's no one supporting us no one cheering us on but when there is even if that's a good friend or a loving parent or whatever you see it all the time with kids the person can be themselves more because they know they're supported so i can say to you like i said to her i said okay this week go and express yourself in a scary way but feels like your truth to four people are you committed to make this happen she said oh my god yes and after that happened my god like she called me and she was so excited she's like this has been on my head for like four years i've had these broken like this feeling of disconnection for four years just resentment and all this stuff and now it just instantly is happening so if there's some stuff with the ego and the inner self i'll sometimes just make people go into the real world and do it rather than just the inner work here's another example if you want to create the life you want of let's say um someone said to me once they said i'm kind of scared of rejection kind of scared of rejection i'm scared that when i um offer my services to someone they're gonna freak out and say oh my god that's too expensive or they're gonna or i'm gonna freeze you know i'm gonna get into that rejected state of mind let's call it fear worry so i said okay how about we play the rejection game this week and she's like what the hell is that i was like we're gonna go find some rejections i want you to get rejected your the purpose of this game is for you to get rejected and actually i got this from a guy i read his book it's called rejection proof i'll um recommend to you guys i said to her go and get rejected five times slightly different to the book but in her context let's say go and ask for things where you know someone's gonna say no and you're gonna feel so awkward go and collect that no and she's like oh my god so scary but yes i'm in because we're playing a game now i'm there with her i'm i'm like you know that's why the word coach is so powerful because i'm there with her on the sidelines cheering her on she's telling me after each one oh my god it went like this oh my god it went like this so these games are so important playing these games in the real world not just the inner work because sometimes no matter what inner work you do you're not prepared when you actually go and play in the real world yeah it can bring you massive insights in a much quicker way much quicker way you have doubt about opening a business or your thing okay let's let's go and do stuff in the real world that will get you prepared the doubt will work on as well on the side you know both in line with each other so it's like i'm mixing the world of you know achievement and you know you get a lot of success coaches i'm mixing that with like the deep spiritual work so they're both one and that's how you create the life you want that's what i've learned it can't be either extreme it has to be in harmony with each other play play is spiritual it's scary all these challenges might be very scary for sure but if the if it's if it's if you're gonna do it like you can even just get yourself an accountability friend or just tell your friend i'm about to do this kind of similar to when i was talking about someone has me as their coach and they're supporting them so they're gonna do it they know i'm i'm there with like ready to to help them through it so you can do this with a friend if you want you can say hey friend i really want to do this challenge um will you listen to what i'm up to and just be there you know if you have a friend like that i don't know so that's what i've got for you guys today creating the life you want that's for creating the life you want and i might talk in a moment about the other parts what comes up for you any insight so far guys what is your insight so far insights in the chat insight and then see if anything came up for you what has been useful what are you taking away from this what might be some action you might take to create the life you want yeah let's put that out there what might be some action you take i'm calling you out i'm not going to chase you up i'm not going to be there asking you how it went don't worry unless you want me to um but i'm gonna i want to raise your your engagement right now to your life what might be the action that you take to create the life you want share it to declare it in the chat i'm going to quickly read through some of the things people said what about medical health okay i'm not a doctor as such um although someone called me a soul doctor once that was funny um medical health is different well it can be let's say like i said i'm not a medical professional but there's also you know in buddhism there's a whole teaching where they talk about the second arrow does anyone know about a second arrow so there's a thing called a second arrow so first arrow is something happening with your health your medical health your physical body let's say something yeah you've got some health challenges actually i just i just wrote to one of my clients about this recently um so you have some challenge with your health there's an arrow that's been hit into your body something's hurting something's hurting something's healing there's something going on let's just say you're not maybe at your best that's the first arrow that's the reality of the situation the second arrow is how our mind works with that situation how our mind works with it so let's say you've hurt your leg your leg hurts yeah let's say it's bleeding okay it's bleeding it's in pain second arrow could be added pain created by the mind tension freaking out panicking worry it's the second arrow and that can that can expand the health problem massively and there's there's been studies about this you know these days they use the word psychosomatic there's some people who will say all um physical things are created by the mind i don't know if i'd go to that extreme um but there's definitely a connection there's been people who have who have used their mind to actually change their health massively so i'm not making any suggestions here but i'm just pointing towards that direction of the mind is massive in connection to our body massive and they're just starting to figure this out now they're just starting to figure this out yogic science knew this for ages buddhism they knew this they're starting to realize now that their connection to it in let's call it modern um medical care let's call it so that's all i'll say i don't know if that helps does that bring up anything for anyone body and mind are connected for sure i my mind was telling my body to be in fight or flight mode all day long non-stop worry tension i woke up with it tension overthinking whole body was involved in it sweating profusely for no reason all of that was happening because i had challenges with my mind doubt fear worry of abandonment rejection all that stuff i had so my whole body was inflamed it was on fire all the time so that's my example i'm not saying this is every medical thing but that's that's where it comes from from me so you want to create your life of health yeah you do these things you take these actions but again you work on the mind i realize how important it is now mind can create anything okay what else playing the game of life yeah when you know it's a game it reduces a lot of the um edginess of it and even if the stuff you are trying to create in your life is very personal um sensitive we can call it i don't know um it's always helped to lighten to lighten the way you're approaching it in some way always that's why i use the word game gamifying i try and gamify a lot of things okay all right that's what i've got for you guys for now i will do a meditation at the end um if you stay that long i'll do it meditation right at the end inner and outer world that's what i'm going to summarize it as that creating the life you want inner and outer and the other part of inner is finding peace within yourself to some level i'm not saying hey go and be enlightened remove all worries and fears because that wouldn't be living to me i think it's okay to have all those things what i really mean is being okay with how you're experiencing life because when we when we're in that state of i'm okay in this moment i'm okay it's so relieving so relieving so that's almost the step before all of this visualization and stuff that i was talking about is to get yourself in a calmer state where you know you're okay telling the body to slow down becoming present presencing as i like to call it presencing and then going and having step one seeing playing visualizing drawing writing things down that you want in your life in a playful way and then okay this is what i want what do i what do i have to do i gotta go do stuff now do i want to wait for everything just to appear yeah you can there's a lot of good books that talk about this the uh ask and it shall be given and a lot of wayne dyer's work which i love by the way i'm not i'm not against any of this all of it's powerful i don't want to just play in that zone because it can become passive then passive i like to play passive and active yin and yang i like to play both that's why i think a complete the completeness of our human potential is to play in both and not be swayed by all that's out there that just focuses on manifestation and ask and it shall be given realize that like both are very powerful together they're even more powerful so guys that's the secret excuse the pun that's the secret uh i don't even know where that came from but that landed perfectly on time all right guys last thing i'm going to say before the meditation and again anytime you have an insight anything anything clicks anything relates to your life put it in the chat at any moment because if you lose it if you miss the insight it will disappear you've missed it you've missed the chance to crystallize it as i say i carry a notepad with me or my phone when i have these insights i just write it down i catch it before it disappears because if you catch it then it lands deeply so if you get an insight any moment write it down last thing i'm going to say is second part of this topic i called creating the life you want versus chasing temporary highs all the time we chase the highs as a distraction you know you can even call tv netflix a high in a way it's this trying to feel something i want to feel something or i want to i want to remove this other feeling that's chasing a high i don't like how this feels i want to feel something else chasing highs to try and alleviate feelings and i'm not judging anyone like even the way i'm saying this you know i might be using a judgmental voice but i'm saying it because it's been me i've chased i've chased all distractions procrastination we call it whatever chasing the high if you want to create the life you want the very simple way to do it is each day do one thing that will move you towards what you want one thing one powerful thing okay i want to create my health okay i'm gonna go for a run i i really don't want to go for a run i really don't i've got such um resistance if you've ever read this book called the war of art read it because it talks a lot about resistance procrastination amazing book so let's say you're resisting your run well now your health is not going to magically fall into place because you visualized it sorry you gotta go do your run and then after you're gonna feel amazing so it's it's fine you're tempted to eat the tray of cookies when you're trying to lose weight okay you'll get three seconds of pleasure is the three seconds of pleasure worth not having your health no you tell me you gotta take action on that you want to work on becoming still and then you say ah hmm i haven't got time to meditate i think the universe will just help me become calm the secret i don't know about that but i still believe in disciplines actions discipline go and meditate for 10 minutes 10 minutes takes 10 minutes for me to get dressed sometimes you know it's not long so this is what i mean if someone is not committing to the actions that go with that align with the life that they want that they visualize it's going to be very difficult for things to occur and then you chase temporary highs because you you start judging yourself oh my god i didn't do this oh let me just let me bury myself in a hot chocolate and watch netflix again that was me in the past a lot of this i still i still do it sometimes i catch myself a lot actually catch myself like tempted to go and scroll on social media or go and go and do this stuff as a distraction just just to avoid doing the thing i really want or the thing i don't want to do but will give me what i want you know and i don't think this is about like forcing is i don't believe in force instead it's like coming from a loving place i love this thing i'm seeing in the future this feels so good to know i'll be in good health if i do this like loving yourself anyway i'm gonna leave it as that guys the name of the book is called the war of art the war of art by stephen pressfield awesome book so that's all i've got today guys this is such a deep topic i can talk about this forever well that's i've given you as much as i could squeeze into this time frame um i'd usually go way deeper with someone when i'm working with them personally it'll be like let's talk about this let's do this let's make this real let's take actions you wanna you want this okay let's go and do these things and let's do this inner stuff this is the way i describe it to you guys as i as i am here i kind of give you a glimpse into what you can do so we're going to do a meditation in a moment um if anyone wants any more book recommendations i've got like a specific list that i made and i posted it on my instagram it's on the highlight reel so my instagram is raj galsia and i've got like 60 books there like really amazing books really amazing books so check it out find it there and you'll see some good books also i post there every day i'll post a little story tell you what's happening with my life so if anyone's interested just go take a look also i have a newsletter i have a newsletter which i send i'm going to be sending more often and where i talk more about some of my stories i share photos um and videos and stuff that's not actually sometimes not even public so if you want to join that my website is withraj.

Com withraj.

Com it doesn't cost you anything to join and you just type your email in and you'll start getting emails from me none of this spam stuff it's just kind of like this but in a written form and the last thing i'd say is if you are challenged by something or you there is this life you want to create but you're not keeping yourself accountable or you're getting confused in the strategy how do i make this happen i can feel it i can see it i don't know how to play the game of life though i find myself um taking myself out of the game too easily or getting in my head yeah i get you that's that's been me for most of my life so if you want some help then just again go to my website and send me a message and i i help people for free first you know and before someone starts working with me i'll just help as much as i can for free and if it feels like oh cool like maybe we should get start working together then i'll say okay let's talk about that just like a normal conversation right so if anyone wants to um yeah i appreciate that if anyone wants to just um get have a conversation with me just normally and you want some help with something just drop me a message people do this all the time i get messages saying hey raj i'm i'm finding it hard to meditate for example do you have any suggestions for when this happens or i get some deep stuff sometimes like raj there's something going on um at work or i want to create a new business or i'm having challenges with um a relationship that i'm in i get all sorts of stuff and i'll usually just point the person towards the direction send them a resource that i've written video whatever or send them to another person maybe that could help them sometimes or i'll say let's get on the phone and we can talk about this a bit more sometimes not with everyone but sometimes so that's my invitation call it an invitation because it means there's a door that's open and if you want to start working on whatever you want then okay you can walk through that door it's a website there's a website right there that's the door cool um what else do i have to say before we go into meditation we're getting to a good time um oh and i will be hosting a small group program at some point if you want to know about that i want to create a small group program with like-minded individuals who want to slow down they want to get into this state of presencing and then create their life from a place of presencing and love so if anyone wants to know about that drop me a message that's all i'm going to say on it because i don't like to sound like um i'm pitching anything because that's that's weird so we can have a conversation so guys that's all i've got for you now now we're going to end with a lovely meditation you have stayed all the way to this point if you have anyway um so get into your space where you feel like you can sit for the next 10 minutes and just sit there's no pressure to be a certain way just sit close your eyes because eyes closed means we can rest them from screens i don't always say close your eyes but let's do it this time start just listening to your breath there's no need to do anything with it there's no need to like get into this mode of oh my god i have to slow down my breath oh my god i have to breathe slower no this relax there's no need for any of that right now just watch as the stomach slowly rises and falls rises and falls all on its own doesn't need your help so just let it do its thing appreciate your breath for always being there and breathing life into you if you have any thoughts appearing see if you can love them as well beautiful mind in all its glory see if you can smile a little bit smile because you have a mind that thinks and smile because you have a playful side one that smiles and laughs and sometimes sings even for anything like me you'll notice these tingling sensations in your body as you smile these little tingles now start to picture the life that you want to create and channel the younger you the play for you one that had imaginary friends maybe created all these games funny curious a little bit naughty perhaps and start to see this life you'd love to create feel it really feel it and be it right now feel it go through your body being in this life that you want to create now coming back to the present moment fully think about one tiny action you could take to move you towards this life one tiny action this could be an inner action this could be an outer action sometimes an inaction a non-action is also an action sometimes a non-action is also an action decide decide and commit commit to making this action with your heart with your heart let's see how that feels now it's time to come back and open your eyes just like that open your eyes just like that open your eyes and be here be here okay guys in the comments put if anything came up for you during the experience anything came up for you during the experience and that's what we'll end on tiniest action i say that i use my language very specifically like i said before tiniest action sometimes we try and go into the biggest action and then we freak ourselves out tiniest action what could that be start with that if you want or you can go for the biggest one if that suits you whatever it is whatever you're going to actually do however you're going to be because really all doing comes from a state of being you could be doing something because you're being scared or you could be doing something because you're being inspired that's my last words guys is anyone going to commit to an action put a yes in the chat and we'll leave it as that share it to declare it going to commit to an action put a yes in the chat and we'll leave it as that yes yes there we go now now it's happening committing it's happening someone the other week i'll just say there's one thing said he's going to write a book he just during this session he came to this session with i've been thinking about this for years and then during the session he committed to writing the book and i said to him email me keep you accountable tell me how that went no actually my challenge was to him write for seven days and then email me i got an email from him yesterday now it's happening because he's committed to it so my invitation if you'd like it is if you're committing to some kind of action if there's something you're exploring some transition some new career whatever and you want to create accountability you can message me telling me what your action is i'm not going to chase you up it's just knowing that there is something a container perhaps so it's on you there's no pressure from me so guys i'm gonna leave it as that enjoy have fun have a beautiful wonderful day and i've got a session actually let me see i think i'll go on on tuesday if anyone wants to join on tuesday i've got a session where i'm going to talk about how i turn my passions how i turn my passions into a career and it's actually called how to turn your passions into a career and sometimes like i even thought about this maybe career sometimes is not even the right word we could we could even say turn your passions into reality turn your passions into reality you want to make a book okay let's make that happen the career is even even even asking for more commitment that's why i named it that if you want to actually turn this into a career okay let's raise your commitment and that's what it took for me it was a it was a big thing for me to actually turn this into a career huge i'll share my story on tuesday if anyone wants to come um i'll leave it as that guys have a good week smash your commitments be in your inner state of love and visualization there's nothing that can stop you this took me years to figure out um so i'm telling you this is real all right guys i'm gonna leave it as that love you have fun and keep playing never stop playing see you later this is my awkward wave my awkward wave goodbye