Awakening Eikev 5783: Torah Mussar Mindfulness, 42nd Sitting

AWAKENING EIKEV 5783: TORAH MUSSAR MINDFULNESS, 42nd SITTING

קהילת מוסר - Kehilat Mussar, Mussar Mindfulness
Welcome to The Institute for Holiness: קהילת מוסר - Kehilat Mussar’s weekly public offering to study Torah together from the lens of Mussar Mindfulness. We engage in a teaching and then in a guided mindfulness meditation practice.

Transcript

Shalom,

Baruchim habaim,

Shalom,

Shalom.

So grateful that you are here joining us today for Awakening Torah Musar Mindfulness.

I am Rabbi Chassio Uriel Steinbauer,

The founder and director of the Institute for Holiness,

Kichilat Musar Mindfulness,

Where we offer three paths towards wisdom,

Towards liberation,

Towards holiness.

That of the path of Musar from Judaism,

The second path of the synergy and the dance between two ancient traditions,

That of the Dharma in Theravada Buddhism,

Vipassana,

Insight,

Meditation,

And that of Musar in Judaism,

And the third path of a sangha of mindfulness,

Meditation,

Of insight.

We're delighted that you are here for the synergy where we look at the Hebrew Bible,

The Torah,

The weekly Torah portion from the lens of Musar and mindfulness to gain what our ancestors have to share with us,

What God has shared with us in the Torah.

Today is Sunday,

August 6th,

2023,

Which we are covering the Torah portion from yesterday,

Ekev,

And the book of Devarim of Deuteronomy,

Which was on August 5th,

2023,

Which was the 18th,

Yurchet of the month,

The Hebrew month of Av,

And Tafshin Pei Gimel in 5783 of the Hebrew calendar year.

So hopefully you've had a chance to look at Ekev,

To really go into what the parashanim or the commentators have to say.

We're gonna explore a bit of the Torah portion from those lenses to gain the most insight that we can.

And we will engage in Musar mindfulness meditation practice so that we can really begin to integrate these midot,

These soul traits and the path and the practice.

So before we begin,

We always touch upon our kavanot,

Our intentions for today's practice.

If you're joining us on live stream or on video or on the website or any of the social mediums that are available on social media to witness,

You will see my sharing the screen now for our kavanot,

Our intentions.

But if you are listening on podcasts or from other medium of audio file,

Then you will hear me read these out loud or say you do not have vision.

So the first is we are describing what we do here together,

This 45 minutes of practice and learning.

We see this as an act of radical self-care because you're spending time really strengthening yourself,

Taking refuge and community or refuge here with me as your teacher,

Refuge in the teachings of Musar and mindfulness so that you are stronger and more of the person you're supposed to be in service of others.

So we say,

This is something I'm doing to strengthen my own soul in order to be a benefit to others in the future.

Then we say that we are also doing this as an act for others.

We're doing this to strengthen our relationship to others so we can be a better conduit of God's good to others when they need us.

And finally,

We say we're doing this act to strengthen our relationship with the divine.

And we do this so that we can be a better conduit of God's good to others.

So may we merit today fulfilling these kavanot,

These intentions as we move through Ekev,

Okay?

So as always,

I'm going to provide a bit of a summary and then we'll hone in on what I think is important right here and right now,

Which of course could change,

Right?

Like next year when we meet,

Which will be the 42nd sitting together,

B'ezrat Hashem,

God willing,

I will have something else to teach about Ekev.

That's the beauty of these ancient texts and tradition passed on to us that we just dig and dig and dig and study.

And there's always new insight.

We're changed,

We're different.

So may it be so,

B'ezrat Hashem,

Right?

So what happens in this week's Parsha?

Essentially,

Moshe Rabbeinu,

Our great teacher,

Our ancestor,

He asked the children of Israel,

To follow the mitzvot,

The commandments,

And to remember all the ways that God has cared for our ancestors in the Midbar,

In the wilderness.

And if they do this,

They will be blessed in the land that will produce plenty of food.

And how will they be blessed?

They'll be able to reproduce and have children and be secure in the land.

Now,

The second thing that is covered is that the concern with abundance.

And with that comes one of the major hindrances,

One of the key things that we say in the Dharma of greed,

Ill will,

Or hatred and delusion.

In comes greed,

Usually,

With abundance.

This concept that if we feel too comfortable,

The concern in the Torah is that we might imagine that we alone are responsible for who we are and what we are today and all that we've gathered in terms of wealth.

And so there's a real concern in the Torah that we have to be careful of this type of thinking,

And that we must always remember that we're always dependent on God,

Which we will touch upon,

What does dependence mean?

Hey,

What's the dance and the struggle that's gonna go on in this Torah portion of Ekev that is so,

Provides so much insight to who we are and the path that we're on.

And one of the ways to keep this lesson in mind that we alone are not responsible for who we are,

Where we are,

The station we are in life,

Our social location,

The privileges that we may be granted based on race or perceived race,

Gender,

Sexual orientation,

Citizenship,

Location,

Class,

Privilege,

All the things that we get the ableism,

Okay?

So one of the ways we keep this lesson in mind is by thanking God after eating.

Why?

We are most satisfied at that moment,

Right?

It's a moment of abundance,

This feeling that we're satisfied,

And we don't think,

Okay,

I made this food,

I'm responsible for this food,

I'm going to not thank God,

But instead you're going to turn to God and thank God.

Moshe Rabbeinu,

Our lovely teacher,

Retells the story of how Bnei Israel rebelled often in the wilderness,

And that when our ancestors worshiped,

Or what it seemed to be,

Worship of the eagle,

Of the golden calf,

Which I touched upon some time ago,

What was actually going on there.

So Moshe stood up for the people,

Even though there was also not standing up for some of the people,

Right?

But in general,

It's seen as that he stood up for the people,

And he praised to God to remember.

Let's remember.

Let's remember how remembering is so important,

Especially this parasha,

Okay?

Ekev means heal,

It means follow,

Following,

To follow.

And so it's important for us to follow a law that we are to remember,

At least core,

Right?

Zephirah.

It's so important.

It touches way back when we started the whole Torah portion of Bereshit.

What is it that we are supposed to know,

Yada?

What are we supposed to remember,

Right?

I think about back to our first ancestors of Avraham,

Even all the way into Egypt with the lovely midwives of Shifra and Pu'ah,

What did they know and what did they remember,

Right?

They had a fear of God.

And that fear of God meant religion.

Like that's what it meant as religion back then.

It meant that you knew God,

You knew there was a moral code,

A moral compass of how to be and behave in the world.

And that you remember that every single day as a practice,

As a cultivation,

Because it's so easy to forget.

So you'll recall that Moshe prayed to God to remember.

What is God supposed to remember?

God is supposed to remember the covenant and the promise that God made with Avraham,

Yitzhak and Yaakov,

Abraham,

Isaac and Jacob,

Our ancestors,

Our patriarchs.

And that really special,

Beautiful covenant that they would have ancestors as numerous as the stars in the sky or the little sand pebbles.

And that their ancestors,

Those stars in the sky,

As numerous as they could be,

Would inherit the lands promised to them,

Right?

The land of Israel.

So God at the same time is to remember something,

Okay?

There's two forms of remembering that we're going to touch upon.

And finally,

In Bnei Israel,

Fear and love and stick to God,

Right?

There's this concept that the rain will come at its right time and inherit Israel and the land of Israel.

But if they fail,

Then there will not be enough rain.

And this is where we get to the second paragraph of the central prayer in Judaism called the Shema.

It's in,

There are three paragraphs,

It's in the second one.

So that is a summary.

Now,

What do I want to touch upon today?

There are a couple of things that I think,

Hopefully I'll be able to weave all together because it makes sense in my own head,

Actually more in my heart.

But I'm not sure if it'll make sense once I move through it.

So take this journey,

This ride with me.

Let's jump in with both feet.

So there's this real concern,

Right?

On one hand,

That we'll take credit,

We'll become a life of abundance in the new land.

Well,

There'll be wealth,

There'll be security.

And we will move to almost a form of complacency where we will not attribute who we are and how we got to this place to our God.

But rather that we will take credit for ourselves,

We will self-attribute essentially.

And so there's this concern here,

If you're following along in Devarim chapter eight,

Verses 17 and 18,

That we might say to ourselves,

My own power and the might of my own hand got me all this wealth.

And you can change wealth for whatever it is that today speaks to you.

What is where we are weak in our practice,

Where we lean towards too little anava,

Too little humility and we're arrogant,

Where we attribute things to our own hands,

Right?

So if it's not wealth,

It could be my intelligence,

My teachings,

What I offer.

And for,

Ah,

You know,

It could be any number of things that we all offer either in our families or in our careers or out in our lives,

Okay?

So what is the antidote?

Okay,

Least score,

Remember.

Remember God,

Your Lord,

Who is the one who gives you the power to get wealth,

The one who gives you,

Who essentially births you with your parents,

Who sustains you,

Who provides the intelligence that you have,

The able body or not.

Provides everything,

Right?

The power to get wealth and wealth here can mean health.

Does it mean financial wealth?

Fulfilling the covenant that God promised to your ancestors just like today.

So this is so key,

Right?

Because we all can,

In our daily Muslim mindfulness practice,

Get sometimes a little blinded to facing where we still have practice and work to do.

And this is a key area that has to be paid attention to that when we basically forget to remind ourselves to give credit to God,

To give credit to others who have helped us along the way.

And that's when we become lost.

That's when we are getting off the path.

Okay,

So there's a great concern there.

And how does that concern get addressed?

How do we remember?

How are we reminded in the store portion?

We're reminded with what is called the manna test,

Right?

The man.

Now,

A lot of people are,

Parshanein commentators are perplexed of why is this a test?

How is it a test that God provides abundance of food anytime we need it?

Double portion before Shabbat.

How is that a test?

Well,

There are definitely commentators who say it is a test to just constantly have whatever amount of food you want whenever you want it,

Okay?

And I can even vouch for this with my own two children that we have been privileged and blessed to be able to provide them what food they want when they want.

And it doesn't actually lead to them being grateful and attributing it to God and others.

If anything,

Greed develops,

Right?

The sense of,

I want more.

It's either not enough or I get bored of it and I want something else.

And this is the dukkah.

This is,

Which gets translated as suffering,

But it means so much more.

There's so much nuance to it.

It can mean dissatisfaction,

Anything that causes pain,

Anything that causes a lack of expansion and liberation,

Right,

Our reactivity.

And so this is so common when we are kind of spoon-fed,

When we are given whatever we need and even want,

It's a real challenge that we will somehow,

The mind will somehow find a way to find displeasure with it eventually.

And that is part of the practice.

So God is aware of this and so are our ancestors in this Torah portion,

Ekev,

That it's really emphasizing two different models for us,

Which this is where I want to kind of hone in and bring other examples,

Which is,

Let me pull my source.

There's this concept brought by Eric Fromm,

Which is a famous Jewish psychoanalyst.

And he basically has writings on the two categories of religion,

Where he saw authoritarian religion and humanistic religion.

Now,

Of course,

Today we would say this is a bit limited and maybe black and white,

But we're gonna use this as a launching pad in order to understand more of what's going on in our Torah portion.

So we might say that total dependence on God with the man,

The manna in the minbar in the wilderness,

The water,

That our shoes did not wear,

The clothing did not wear of our ancestors,

All this complete dependence on God,

Really according to Eric Fromm,

It identifies as an authoritarian religion,

One in which is a great dependency on God.

And this utter dependency really ends up forming,

If we look at our ancestors,

Deep kind of push and pull,

Almost like a teenager becoming,

Right?

Where I want this dependency,

I want what you have to care for me for and what you offer,

But then I don't,

Because there's a certain sense that I want to produce some of this,

I want to be independent.

And we witnessed this struggle with Bnei Yisrael,

With God,

Right,

Over this authoritarian,

Where there's this utter dependence.

And you can sense that God also struggles with this,

Right?

God,

It's like almost there's a fear that if we are not utterly dependent,

Then we will forget God,

We will not be in relationship with God.

And so God struggles with this,

This sense of like,

You provide this,

God provides this,

God provides the land,

You're going to be utterly dependent,

You're going to,

The rain will come at the right time,

You will be secure,

That God will take care of us,

Right?

And then all of a sudden there comes almost a new voice,

But that has been with us all the way through the Torah.

It started with our ancestors with this concept of fear of God,

Where they were able to develop their own inner moral compass in relationship with God,

Even before God made God's self known to them,

Which is quite beautiful and amazing,

It shows our ancestors' faith.

So this emerges in chapter 10 in Pesach verse 12,

Where we are told the Atah and now,

Israel,

What does your God,

Your Lord ask of you?

Only this,

To fear God,

Your Lord,

To walk in God's ways,

To love God,

To serve God,

Your Lord with all your heart and all your soul.

That is so beautiful and profound.

And it's a shift,

It's God moving slightly away from the authoritarian model to what Erufam defines as the humanistic model.

What is this humanistic model,

Right?

Is that we're given a very,

Not,

This is like these words here are not specific mitzvot,

Are not specific commandments.

It's not very clear exactly what does it mean in thought,

Word,

In deed,

To fear God and to walk in God's ways,

To love God,

To serve God,

Right?

That's more of like a,

It's almost like a kiddushim to you,

You shall be holy.

It's like an umbrella term.

And here we're getting back to this concept of fear of God,

Right?

Which means love of God,

Of religion,

Of inner moral compass,

That which we follow,

Which we know God wants us to,

Right?

This upright,

Wholesome,

Moral and ethical path.

And it's relying on us to do so,

Right?

We have to develop and practice this.

And so God here is taking a chance,

Right?

It is moving from constriction,

This dependency authoritarian model to,

Okay,

Children,

Okay,

Children,

This is what I want from you.

This is what I expect from you.

This is how I can be in relationship with you.

And it's extremely profound because we are told over and over again in Ekiv,

We are to remember,

We remember God,

We remember the mitzvot,

The commandments,

We remember to recall the patriarchs because we want God also to remember.

So God is remembering too.

And there's this dance where God feels in some ways locked by that breed,

By that covenant with our patriarchs,

Our ancestors,

Because God promised descendants like the stars in the sky,

The land of Israel.

God is locked in that covenant,

In that promise,

In that vow.

And as much as we are in covenant and have received the Torah from God,

We at any moment can abandon that covenant and God will still be tied to the patriarchs.

So God has taken a real chance with us,

With the children of Israel,

With Jews.

There's this real,

If anything,

God is dependent upon us.

And so there's been this shift,

Shift in Ekiv of follow and follow with your own free will.

Follow because you know this is the upright and the right path.

Follow your inner moral compass.

And it's a real gift that we've reached this,

This ve'ata,

Right?

You now have,

In some sense,

It's like saying to B'nai Israel,

It's time,

It's time to cultivate,

It's time to practice,

It's time to grow up.

It's time to enter the land and take responsibility.

And there,

All of it is quite touching and beautiful.

And I think it really speaks of this shift that we are witnessing,

That,

That God is dancing with us and taking this shift and that we are too.

And the final thing I want to share with you before we move into our mindfulness meditation is this shift in this relationship and how we actually are going to try to dance and trust one another,

Trust in the potential of the path,

Right?

Is this real sense that,

That we even are going to reflect back to God,

How we are going to choose to see God and be in relationship with God and to emulate God.

What is it that we've learned from our ancestors all these years?

So it's quite beautiful.

What is it?

When we say the first blessing of the Amidah that comes from,

From the teachings in this Torah portion,

We say,

Ha-el ha-gadol ha-gibor v'ha-no-rah.

The great and mighty and awesome God.

And it doesn't mean strong.

That was the God and maybe even the God we needed taking us out of the institution of slavery,

Saving us with a stretched out arm,

Strong.

But what is it that we see that we say that,

Ha-el ha-gadol ha-gibor v'ha-no-rah.

What is that God now?

It is not.

What do we learn in Devarim chapter 10,

17 and 18?

The great and mighty and awesome God who does not favor people unfairly,

Who does not take bribes.

Okay,

This is upright,

Wise,

Rightful,

Right living,

Right speech,

Right thoughts,

Right practice,

Right livelihood.

This is what God emulates for us and what we live and practice.

Goes on to say,

Right?

Oseh mishpat yatom v'al manah v'ohevger letet lo lechem v'sim la.

Who does justice for the orphan and the widow and loves the strangers,

Giving them food and clothing.

So according to Parshat Ekev that we are in and blessed to study together today,

It's the way that God cares for people fairly and helps people who are in trouble and who don't fit in that we remember and that we emulate.

And that is our moral compass.

That is what we mean when we follow God Ekev with our full selves,

That both of us in this dance together,

Experimenting,

Are learning and stretching to really live the best version of who we can be in service of God,

In service of God,

In service of others,

Right?

Bringing God's good to others.

So this gets very much reflected in today's Parsha,

This sense of fluidity and changing self and changing relationship.

And one where we are more open-hearted and kind,

Remembering those who are most vulnerable.

I mean,

That's why we're told in the Parsha to circumcise our hearts,

To remain fleshy and soft and kind and compassionate and open.

So beautiful.

And this is what Erich Fum has brought to teach us this concept of these two extremes,

As we know in Musar and the Musar continuum of Eni Midah,

Of psaltery,

We're never really fully in the extremes.

We might be situationally,

But God too is kind of fluctuated from authoritarian to humanistic and we too.

And so I think the goal is to learn from both and to realize that there's a time and a place for both forms of religion,

Both practices,

And it's all a part of the path together,

The path towards holiness.

So let's move into our mindfulness meditation together today.

Assume one of the four mindfulness meditation postures.

I'm going to remain seated.

You may want to stand,

Walk back and forth with no place in particular you're going or lie down if you need to,

Especially if you're having any pain.

The practice is not meant to cause pain.

So please assume a posture that is right for you where you can be upright,

Even if you're not upright,

It's more here and here.

And one where you're also at ease.

And we're going to begin with three deep cleansing breaths,

Inhalation and exhalation.

This time,

Raise your shoulders.

Inhalation,

The gift of ease.

And exhalation,

Lowering the shoulders,

Allowing in a little joy.

If it's coming naturally to you,

No need to force it.

Grounding your feet so you really feel held by the earth.

And this last inhalation really inviting you to this present moment to be here with me in this practice.

Inhalation,

The gift of oxygen.

And exhalation.

Thank you,

Hashem,

For this gift that sustains us and holds us every single day.

You are arriving to stillness,

To a quietness.

Fully here.

Close your eyes if you feel safe and ready to do so,

Otherwise lower your gaze.

Ekev,

What is it that you need to follow and strengthen today?

What is this Torah portion here to teach you today?

What is the small,

Still voice of Hashem within speaking to you?

The potential of this path is that over time,

Taking refuge together in a vaad,

Sanga,

Practice together,

That we really do develop that inner moral compass.

The teachings of the Torah,

Of Musa and of the Buddha teach us the path of wisdom.

The path has been tried for well over 2,

600 years.

The path that our ancestors passed on to us,

One of wisdom,

One of joy,

One of loving kindness,

One of compassion and equanimity.

And we can really trust in the potential of the past.

We can trust in God and Hashem,

Trust on that which has been entrusted to us by our ancestors,

By our grandparents,

Our parents,

Our communities.

This is our birthright.

I can remember being a child and so wanting to love God with all my heart and all my soul as it is written in yesterday's Torah portion.

I would even pray to God,

Please,

How do I love you with all my heart and all my soul?

How do I show you?

How do you know?

And that is it.

Daily cultivation of the circumcised hearts.

The one that we turn toward the suffering,

Our own and others.

Knowing that we have the capacity to meet it,

Expansive and open,

Carrying the burden with the other.

That is what God wants of us.

That is what God means to love with all your hearts and all your soul,

To protect the vulnerable,

Live upright,

Just one day at a time,

One word at a time,

One thought at a time,

One emotion at a time,

One feeling tone at a time.

Whether we're on the cushion or out in the world doing our Musar work,

Knowing that this is your inheritance,

This is your gift,

That you too have the capacity to turn toward the suffering,

Yours and others,

To remain soft and kind and compassionate.

The fleshy circumcised heart.

I invite you to put your hands on your hearts.

The practice is at each moment that we can remain awake or return that Teshuvah,

That returning to being awake.

We can always ask,

What is an appropriate response?

What is an appropriate response?

What can you practice and cultivate today?

We move into silent meditation.

I will ring the bells when it's time to come out.

You are new to the practice of meditation,

Of insight,

Vipassana,

Mindfulness meditation.

The object of attention is often your breath.

And if it's too difficult to pay attention to your breath,

Then your full body breathing or the sounds around you.

And right now,

My voice.

Returning your attention always to the present moments,

Witnessing,

Watching yourself as a beloved best friend,

And the mind will wander,

It always does.

The practice is to,

With kindness,

Curiosity,

Just bring yourself back to the present moment,

To the practice.

As Joseph Goldstein loves to teach,

Simply begin again.

It's custom to give God a deep inner bow,

A bow to our practice,

To our ancestors,

To each other.

For this practice today,

So grateful for your presence and you committing to this path and practice here at the Institute for Holiness,

K'chilat Musa,

Or Mindfulness.

I'm Rabbi Chassia.