Can We Be Happy At Work?

James and Lisa talk with their Guest Actor, comedian, speaker and Chief Happiness Officer, Brooklyn Dicent about real practical ways to find true happiness inner careers. Brooklyn has synthesized her trying in NLP, Coaching, Neuroscience, and Hypnosis into concrete action you can start right now!

Transcript

Welcome to the Practical Consciousness Podcast with James and Lisa,

Where we help you tap into your highest selves in everyday life.

Welcome to the Practical Consciousness Podcast.

I'm Lisa.

And I'm James.

Well everyone is in for a treat today because we have a guest.

Yay.

We have an awesome guest.

Awesome.

Yes.

So our guest today is obsessed with finding happiness at and in work.

Since middle school,

She began studying success magazines,

Listening to motivational speakers and learning how to be her own boss.

Inspired by reading,

Do What You Love and The Money Will Follow,

At age 14,

She started her own carpet cleaning business.

At 22,

She started her first consulting company and today is the chief happiness officer at the Happiness Consulting Company here in Seattle,

Washington.

She's a sought after speaker and career happiness coach.

She helps clients apply neuroscience and positive psychology to find happiness at work,

At work and in work.

Please welcome Brooklyn DeSant.

Yay.

We're good.

Yeah.

In the house,

Brooklyn.

Thank you very much.

Thank you so much.

Thank you so much.

So Brooklyn,

Tell us about what you do to help your clients find happiness at work and in their work.

Yeah.

Great question.

You know,

It's interesting because as you were reading the intro,

I thought,

Well,

Is that because I started the carpet business because it made me happy.

It's just,

I wanted money and I'm like,

That's what I needed.

I needed some money.

I was hard to ask my parents for money.

In fact,

My dad,

I finally figured it out.

When I asked for money,

He would say one of two things.

He would say,

We'll see,

Which meant no.

And the other one I really loved when we became born-again Christians was,

We'll ask God.

And I'm like,

Well,

He's not going to give me any.

I'm asking it for you,

Not him.

And so I'm like,

Well,

This is bogus.

And at some point,

You know,

When you're a kid and you start growing up,

You start realizing things and not,

You know,

There's other things going on.

And I knew that my parents just couldn't,

You know,

They had four mouths to feed four kids and I pretty much ate for eight.

And so I'm like,

Right.

You know,

I need to find my own way.

And yeah.

And so I became obsessed with this concept of recognizing that there's other ways to make money,

Career,

Whatever.

And so I just couldn't get enough of it.

And then as I got older,

One of the things I'm sure that people who are listening and watching this podcast will be familiar with,

You start working somewhere and you try to find your way through the corporate environment.

You try to figure out what this is all about.

And I remember when I got my first,

First big job was right until age,

But it was a little bit after,

I'm sorry,

Before 9-11 and 9-11 hit.

And about nine months later,

I was out of this big corporate job I had just gotten.

And I thought,

Wow,

This is,

This is like,

What a roller coaster,

Right?

And at the time I remember thinking,

Working for this big company,

I did not know,

Well,

How could I have prevented this?

Like what,

What should I have known as I was working in this company to be more value or what does this all mean?

So in my formative years,

I was trying to figure out the rules of the game,

If you will,

In corporate.

And the more I got engaged in,

In working inside a company,

I thought this gotta be like these,

This inside rules that nobody knows about.

Like,

What are they?

And let me hold,

I just kept studying and just became really interested in what are the things that are impacting me and my work.

And so I thought,

Well,

You know what,

I'm just gonna start focusing.

And I don't know if you've heard of this saying,

Which is,

You know,

Prepare for the job that you want now,

Do what,

You know,

Whatever it is you do now,

Prepare for the job now and you'll eventually will get there.

And I thought,

Well,

You know,

I want to be like chief something,

Or it'll be VP of something.

And taking an assessment,

I was young,

I was like in my early twenties and taking an assessment.

And I never forget this,

The HR person said to me,

Well,

You'll never be VP,

But you can do awesome things.

And I'm like,

Okay,

Well,

Because the assessment didn't have like the,

Whatever I needed to hit the marker.

And I'm like,

Well,

Who said that was the marker?

I don't understand.

And I'm like,

Well,

You know,

I can be VP of anything is having my own business.

So because I had been learning this,

But I thought,

Well,

I still want to make money and how do I do it in a company?

And then slowly but surely,

A lot of the companies that I work in and you guys know me,

I mean,

I have,

Yes,

I have a lot of energy and I'm usually super happy,

But I found myself miserable time and time again.

And then the only was I miserable,

I was making more and more money being miserable.

So now you're miserable and you know,

You can't get out because you're making good money.

And like,

Oh,

You're addicted to the money,

Addicted to the money.

You know,

I always say the first,

Oh my God,

It's terrible.

But the best,

You know,

Sort of moments in a workplace is where you get the job and when you leave it.

Yeah.

It's so true.

Right.

And I'm like,

And I,

So I get the job.

You're like,

Whoa,

Your family's excited.

You can't wait.

It's so amazing.

Right.

Especially if you have,

You don't have money coming in.

Like,

Oh my God,

I'm going to get paid.

Jesus.

I can breathe.

I can go eat.

You know,

Like pay rent,

Right.

I'm like,

Oh my gosh,

I'm like,

Oh,

We could feed those kids now.

Where are they?

No,

But like,

You know,

I'm like,

This is interesting.

What is this pattern?

And I was going job after job and you know,

Again,

Having really great,

Great opportunities,

But at the same time,

Just finding myself constantly sort of miserable.

And but then having to show up and this is the crazy thing because I was so responsible in my life around,

I'm still going to show up to this job.

Like I'm going to do it and I'm going to show up to it.

Even in my insides,

I'm just dying.

Like what am I doing here?

And so over time,

I just got enthused with this concept of maybe it's about figuring out how to be happy at work and how do I,

How to become happy in this thing that for most people,

You know,

If you have a well-paying job or,

Or,

Or a lot of responsibility,

You feel like most people will be like,

Look,

Take it and just,

Just be fine with it.

My mom still can't understand why I keep moving from job to job or finding things I enjoy.

She's like,

If it were me,

I just stick to it as long as I can because we're conditioned to sort of be miserable,

Right?

Like just plow through it,

Be miserable,

Whatever,

Be happy and you know,

Shut up and be happy kind of thing.

So a few years ago,

I stumbled upon this,

Let me back up.

What ended up happening?

And I am also a bunch of other things.

I am a standup comedian and I got to stand up back in like 2001.

I've seen your shows.

Right.

Okay.

That's right.

And I'm like,

This is just the bomb.

Like,

How can I do this whole thing every day?

And I was a trainer.

I was,

I've been a corporate trainer in my whole career.

I thought,

Well,

It would be so great to connect the two and what is it about what I'm doing on stage that brings so much joy that how can I translate that back to my job every day?

So I love that.

Right.

And I have that energy come with me.

And so I'm like,

All right,

I'll just be who I am at work as much as I can,

Because you're also sort of in this place where you can only be so much of yourself and half of yourself is left in the car.

And so I'm like,

All right,

So I'm just going to sort of keep being the self that I'm being.

And the,

Again,

The more I grew up,

The more engaged in different environments,

I thought I'm happiest when I can be my best self,

You know,

In this job,

Even if parts of this job,

I don't like so much or they get in my way or I don't,

I don't care so much for it.

I definitely know that if I can be more of myself in this job,

I can see some happiness and have to figure it out.

Despite who I work for and who I work with and what it is that I'm doing,

I have to figure out ways to do that.

And so one of the first things is,

Okay,

So how can I bring more of who I am to this role?

That's the first line of thinking.

And then a few years ago,

I actually went through a training for a chief happiness officer.

And it's,

It is this,

I just,

It opened up this world of information that had no idea about this is a huge movement globally around finding happiness at work and finding happiness at work comes down to two things.

It comes down to being able to have really good relationships at work with people that you work with,

And then also being interested in the results that you're going to get in your work.

So for example,

When it comes to relationships,

I find that if you,

There's three sort of three levels to it.

One is I have to respect and really like and respect the person I work for,

Right?

Like I can learn something from them.

I value their values or at least in terms of the company,

What they bring to the table,

I can learn from them and I respect them.

I also should,

It should need to at least like and engage with the person,

The people that I work with.

So the person I work for,

I should respect the person,

The people I work with.

I should like and respect and admire perhaps,

Or perhaps feel like,

Oh,

You know what?

These are really intelligent people.

I'm learning something from them.

And then I should also really enjoy the work that I'm actually doing and not the work,

Sorry,

Not too much the work I'm doing,

But the results,

The work is actually the results of the results and the results of the work that I'm doing.

So basically you're saying the value,

You feel like you're bringing value into work itself.

Yeah,

Absolutely.

Bringing value,

But that the actual result,

Yeah.

And to that,

To me,

I,

Cause I also do a lot of sales training,

Which is look,

I want to make sure that,

You know,

Are people able to also quote unquote,

Make money at their job?

Are they able to,

So for what I'm doing,

Am I getting the results that I'm literally being paid for,

Right?

If somebody is writing me a check for X number of dollars a year,

Am I delivering on that?

And you wrap all that with learning.

So I'm now,

You know,

Enjoy who I work with,

For,

Enjoy how I work with and enjoy the results of the work that I do,

Can get.

That balance of those three things,

I found the more I developed this ability at work,

The happier I was.

So and it wasn't so much that I was going to be,

You know,

Happy,

Happy,

Joy,

Joy every day,

But I was finding joy in solving problems and getting results in working with intelligent people and socializing,

Right?

So I put it upon myself to find joy in the work that I was doing,

Regardless of who I was being managed by.

If at some point,

You know,

I got with somebody that,

You know,

Whatever,

I just don't believe like this person,

I found a way to get out from,

Out from under them.

Cause that's usually one of the biggest thing is that if you work for somebody that you just are not in alignment with,

It's like,

It's not like you can't even breathe,

Right?

And you start feeling nervous about what you do and you're uncomfortable around them.

And you just don't feel like you can get things done.

I say,

Get the heck out from under them.

I was going to ask you about that because I know people who don't like their managers and they seem so unhappy.

Get out.

So I take it out and now people say,

Oh,

That's easy for you.

You said,

Listen,

Here's the thing.

You can do a few things.

You can have a conversation with that person if possible,

If the relationship has not gotten so far down the line that it's,

You know,

Irreparable or unfixable.

But I would have a conversation and I have had those conversations of what you want,

What you need,

What you expect.

And I oftentimes,

And here's the key,

You guys,

Oh,

We can go on so many tennis here,

But I will absolutely interview my manager when I'm in going through the interview process.

And by interview them,

I mean,

I want,

I know what I need.

I need a smart manager.

I need somebody who is on top of their game.

I want to feel like I'm learning from them.

And I also want to know that they are a person who allows for independence and autonomy,

Right?

That's important for me.

And I also will ask for example,

Like kids,

You know,

I can talk a whole bunch about interviews,

But I will ask for ways in which they have demonstrated that to their people.

And I also want to know,

Here's brave question.

How many people have been promoted under their tenure?

Good question.

Yeah.

How many people have been,

Not many have been asked that is how many people have been promoted under your tenure?

Not because I'm listening,

Look interested in my next role,

Just before I even get this role.

I just want to see how you develop people.

Yeah.

It shows how well they develop people.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Absolutely.

So it sounds like you need to know what your values are,

What you value in a manager,

And then ask those questions and find out if this is somebody that's going to,

I'm going to be able to work with.

Yeah.

And that's probably because,

You know,

At the end of the day,

You have to deliver to this person,

You know,

Whether we like it or not,

We're trained to be workers since we were little,

Right?

Going to school,

Right from kindergarten all the way through college,

We're trained to be workers,

Which is why in many ways,

Unfortunately,

The school system sort of is in place for is to teach people how to be workers.

And we all had teachers,

Right?

We'll have parents and we all have teachers and you know,

I don't know about you guys,

I just wanted to produce for my teachers.

I wanted to be the best.

I wanted to,

You know,

Make them happy with me.

So this is the same thing with the manager.

You want them to be,

You know,

Sort of happy with the results.

But you also,

The way I started looking at it,

I wanted to work for somebody that I felt like they were a peer and a colleague,

Right?

The only thing that separated us from this standpoint is the hierarchy of a title,

But ultimately I'm like,

Boy,

If we had a project together,

I'd have you in my project.

I think you'd be a great person for me to work with.

It took me,

Obviously,

As you mature,

I don't think millennials can do that today,

Like somebody who's starting their career,

But for me,

That was important to feel like I could be a peer with this person.

And then there were situations where that wasn't the case.

And I thought,

You know,

It started out that way and then it shifted or changed.

And I'm like,

You know what?

I got to move away from this situation.

I just took advantage of my own ability and confidence to know that I could do that.

It's interesting that how you're talking about,

Like,

You took on your own,

Like,

So you looked at your job situation.

You were like,

I'm miserable.

And so instead of looking outside of yourself from the sense of,

You know,

I'm going to fight for this,

Or I'm going to have discussions with this leader,

Blah,

Blah,

Blah,

Blah.

You were like,

You looked inward.

You said,

I've got to change my perspective to get happy.

And I love that that's kind of true to our whole theme of this podcast is this idea that all of us need to stop looking outside of ourselves to find whether it's happiness,

Whether it's to find fulfillment,

Name whatever it is.

It's not outside of us.

It's within us.

It's absolutely within us.

In fact,

To your question that almost emerges from there,

What Jamal asked often,

And by often I mean two people.

Now three,

You're going to ask yourself.

Three people,

That's it.

That's so often is,

You know,

Where is happiness?

How do you find happiness?

Let me just say BLEEP doesn't exist out there.

It is not outside in the world somewhere.

For the most part,

We want to be happy when,

You know,

We all,

If you're,

I'm going to be happy when a statement is very often like,

Oh,

I'm going to be happy when I get this thing or when I have a better manager,

When I have a better,

It's a losing battle.

It's like,

If you're going to,

Is it where you're going to lose?

And I kind of discovered it as I went along and I'll tell you in a moment.

So that sort of way I hit bottom when I thought,

Okay,

This is not cool.

Cause there's always that moment of when was it that you realize this is the thing that this is important.

One of the things is that I learned and I,

And then I went on to study happiness and truly study happiness and psychology of happiness and many,

Many,

Many years ago,

I want to say,

Gosh,

Like maybe over a decade or more or maybe even close to like 15,

16 years ago,

I read this book called it was about choices.

I think it was the psychology of choices and I thought,

Wait a minute.

Okay.

Here's the thing I have about books.

I read books,

But I now on books that just tell me what the title says.

Like I just want to do with title says,

I don't have time to read the whole book.

So you have a choice,

Right?

So,

So your first date is your choice.

I'm like,

Oh God,

It done.

I mean,

I don't want to read the title.

I got it all.

Call me the title.

So basically your current state,

Your,

Your,

Your results are based on the choices that you make.

And I'm like,

Oh,

No kidding.

Okay.

So I can choose this.

And bottom line is happiness,

True happiness and joy.

There's some things that are temporary at work.

It's you get a raise or perhaps a job,

The offer you got or,

Or,

You know,

Money,

Money wise,

It's just a super temporary,

You may feel good about it.

And then,

You know,

If you,

If you,

If you say a number,

When you're going to get an offer,

You go,

They say,

Great.

You probably usually think I should ask more.

And so,

Right.

Where is that very satisfactory,

Satisfactory to our inside,

Our sort of inner being,

What really makes a difference,

What really makes a difference.

This is the key is when you apply your specific talent and ability to solve problems,

To get through challenges.

That's when you're the happiest,

Right?

Because because,

Because it's always like,

It's after you do the thing that you feel the most happy because it's like,

It's like,

Wow,

I was able to do this.

I had the internal resources to do this.

You know,

I had to push through my own beliefs,

Belief systems,

Whatever it is,

Happiness really comes after you do go through sort of,

Sort of the,

The,

The challenge or solving problems.

And when I just understood this,

I thought,

Wow,

This is really,

This really makes sense.

And every single one of us no matter what's going on in your life,

Literally every single one of us,

Whatever the challenges are,

You asked for them,

You chose them,

You sort of signed up for this challenge,

Whatever that is.

And if you're miserable,

It's because you're not finding the solution to the problem.

Yeah.

It's interesting because the opposite of what you said is the definition of stress and anxiety.

It's when I don't feel like I have the skills,

Abilities,

Answers to solve this particular predicament that I'm in is when I become anxious and or stressed.

Yes.

And all of us deal with that in our own different way,

Whatever,

Whether that's drinking or beating something up or whatever,

We all deal with that stress.

So it's interesting that you put it in that term because that would be the definition of fulfillment slash happiness,

Because I do feel like I have the skills,

Abilities,

And I can get past this particular predicament that I'm in and the opposite of anxiety and stress would be happiness or fulfillment.

Yes.

Yeah.

No,

Absolutely.

Absolutely.

Alicia,

You had something?

Well,

It's like being connected to your calling.

That's the word that comes to my mind.

It's like whatever's internal to you that comes natural and easy is going to be most fulfilling.

Yes.

And a couple of things,

I had to write down two things you said was calling and then led me to think about the concept of purpose.

Here's the thing,

And this is again something I discovered.

I'm like,

Ah,

Usually the calling or the thing that you really are the best at,

Likely you were ridiculed for,

People put you down for,

You were told you shouldn't do.

You know,

This is you guys.

Yeah.

Thank you for,

Yeah.

You were ridiculed for,

You feel the most anxious to do like you don't want to,

You're not sure about it.

And something that I discovered was that,

And this you guys were just like blew my mind was that our emotions,

The things that you feel that you want to do,

That you have excitement for,

That you're interested in,

It is literally the whispers of your subconscious mind that is feeding this to you,

Which is why you're feeling it.

And so I was like,

Oh,

Okay,

So if this is what I want to do,

If I want to get on stage and be funny,

Then this is what I'm supposed to be doing.

The task of doing it may be like,

Crap,

Where do I start?

As a comic,

When you get up there and your literal job is to make a bunch of drunk people laugh,

I'm like,

Well,

This is great.

I don't drink,

I wasn't drunk,

And I did laugh.

Right?

And I'm like,

Okay,

This could be,

For most of us,

Actually a lot of us could be comedians because our families are so messed up.

We probably started very early trying to make people laugh,

Right?

It's like,

You gotta be kidding me.

So I found that one of the biggest things is that in order to,

When you push through the fear and all this other stuff that gets in the way,

Ultimately the things that you're wanting to do are truly coming from your subconscious mind,

Is trying to tell you this is what you're here to do.

But here's the amazing thing.

People often ask about,

Not me,

But in general,

About purpose.

What's my purpose?

How do I find my purpose?

And I wish I could just tell people,

Quit trying to find your purpose somewhere out there.

Your purpose is not out there.

Your purpose is right now.

Like for example,

Our purpose,

All three of us here,

Is to have this very conversation.

Like I'm living my purpose by having this conversation,

Right?

So when you literally live on purpose,

Meaning everything you do is,

I'm meant to do this right now,

Then the question becomes,

Right?

How can I bring my very best self to this thing?

I have my partner just actually opened up a gym,

A fitness gym down in Des Moines.

And it's beautiful.

It's an inside fitness.

It's a gorgeous facility.

But it's the building itself is a historical building and it's been around forever.

And after they did this whole construction,

They realized the pipes were historic as well.

It should have been.

AKA,

Dangerous.

This my friends is a game changer.

And I'm like,

Wow.

So now that everything's done,

The pipes are ancient.

So as a result,

One of the things that happens is that,

We all have homes,

We know this,

The drains get backed up,

The sewage gets backed up right towards the,

When it gets to the street.

And so they're trying to figure this out and she finally had to get,

It was costing tons of money to try to get it fixed because ultimately it's either rip the floor up to put in new piping,

Or we have to kind of figure out how to go about this issue.

So one of the results was getting this thing they call the snake business.

And so they just take a,

They call it a snake,

But it's basically some sort of tool,

Plumbing tool.

You drill down into the piping to kind of push out whatever is whatever,

Push out the building.

So what do you got to deal with?

And so at some point where,

I show up and she goes,

I'm doing this and I gave up.

I'm like,

I'll be down there and I'll help you.

And I'm just doing,

I'm just going to town.

I'm pushing this thing,

Pushing this thing out.

I'm like,

Whoa,

What a workout.

And it could have said,

You know,

This is just a little crap.

It was literally right.

Little crap.

But I'm like,

And then once I just went in and did what I have to do,

I said,

Just,

Just hang on a second.

Maybe it'll take,

Give it a minute.

And sure enough,

Within a few minutes,

It like,

It took like all the stuff moved and it was great.

That was my purpose in that moment.

Do you see?

Yeah.

That's what I'm saying.

It's like us as human beings,

We have our purpose and the purpose is to do something with whatever it is you've got.

Right?

So if you,

If you're at the grocery store or you're crossing the street and you see a little old lady crossing,

Trying to help,

That's my purpose.

Like whatever I'm doing in the moment to give to someone else from my talent,

That's my purpose.

That's my purpose.

This full circles back to what you said before about choice.

It's an opportunity for you to choose to do something with more kindness,

Loving,

Happy energy,

Whatever.

Like in your case,

It was,

You were,

You took it on as this is kind of funny.

I'm getting a good workout.

Yes.

You turned it into something different than it could have been.

That it could have been,

I could have been,

I'm like here,

Cause it was like on a Saturday.

There's so many other things that I could have been doing.

I have so many things put there.

I'm like,

Well,

You know what?

Here's what we can do.

And part of it is,

You know,

My creativity thinking about,

You know,

Giving a moment sort of think about the sake of breath.

Maybe you were just frustrated.

All the,

All the elements of makes us who we are.

We get,

When we bring to the moment,

Whatever that moment is,

That's our purpose.

And I don't believe that there is necessarily like,

Like a singular purpose,

Like,

Oh,

I'm here to be this.

I'm here to,

You know,

Cause I think that's,

That's,

That's limiting in many ways because we're so multifaceted.

That is not just the one thing.

Okay.

So if I'm saying I want to be a singer,

Well guess what?

I'm sure you can read.

I'm sure you can teach people.

I'm sure you can write this multifaceted things about you that you,

The,

Our goal,

Our purpose truly is to give our gifts.

And that's really what it comes down to.

So at the end of the day,

It's about how can I share my gifts with other people in any way,

Shape or form?

Now the dark side.

So how did it come about all this,

My friends?

So remember I talked,

Talked about,

Hey,

You know,

I was miserable and I was feeling misery and whatever else.

And it happened,

It happens for quite a bit.

And here I am the title of chief happiness officer,

And I'm a comedian and I'm this and I'm that I'm super happy,

But there's moments.

I'm not so happy.

And more,

Not so happy,

More miserable and more,

More almost like verging of,

I have to think about,

Am I depressed?

Like,

Is this depression?

Like what is going on here?

Like,

What am I feeling this just sense of like a lack of motivation with forward?

Like what is going on?

And so I looked up for the definition.

I even took like online assessments.

It was getting to this point where I was like,

What is this feeling?

What is happening?

And and also cause I felt like a responsibility,

Like I'm the one that this doesn't happen to.

So why am I getting this overwhelming feeling of not sadness,

But just like,

There's just like,

What is this all for?

And this whole sort of misery thinking.

And then I discovered something that is called high functioning depression.

And so high functioning depression is this concept of you get up to go to work,

You see the sun and it's great.

Like it's almost masked by all the things around you that you don't realize that you're not paying attention to certain thoughts that are causing you not to feel that great inside.

And so I thought,

And so when I read the definition,

I thought,

Wow,

This is super interesting because I can see myself here.

I'm not so much like,

It's not like I don't want to get out of bed or like,

I can't deal with people or I can't,

You know,

I,

I still do these things,

But I do them because I have to push through as a responsibility.

But if given the choice,

I'd be like,

I I'll do nothing.

Like I'll,

I will just do nothing.

Right.

And lay in bed.

Right.

Exactly.

Like if I had,

I had the choice,

I'm like,

I would just do nothing.

And that lasted for quite a while and quite a while,

You know,

Definitely a few years on and off,

On and off.

I would be,

I'd be doing a gig.

I'd be speaking on stage.

I'd be doing the show,

Not the show you went to.

Cause I was,

It was over by then,

But I'd be doing things that you would think would be the things that would make me happy.

Miserable.

I was,

It was just not,

I was definitely,

I was not feeling the joy.

And I found that I was,

When I started to focus sort of inward to myself and not giving out,

Even though I was supposed to give it out in the moment,

It was just not connecting.

And then I discovered this concept of,

Like I said,

Which is why I also got into NLP and hypnosis because it's like,

Look,

I need to get to the core of where this comes from,

Your subconscious mind.

And once I understood the language of the subconscious mind,

It was like a trap door opening to make things automatic.

I wouldn't have to,

You know,

I didn't have,

I don't have to do affirmations.

I have to get up and think about these things every day.

It's just,

I install all the information that I want,

Install the messaging I want.

I installed the new software,

If you will,

Into my subconscious mind to do what I needed to do.

How do you do that?

I was going to say now for those people who are listening,

Okay,

What the heck?

How do you do that?

How do you do that?

How do I do this?

How do I get the subconscious mind?

So the how,

The how is a funny thing because it's so easy.

In fact,

We already are doing it.

And so it's through the thoughts you're having and the images you're making in your mind.

So as an example,

In the beginning,

Yes,

You have to do some work to sort of install the new information and the rest of it comes on its own.

Self-hypnosis is really good for this.

And self-hypnosis is sort of like meditation,

But more focused.

And so the scripts online,

You can even get a,

Hey,

I want to become more self assured,

Whatever it is.

But ultimately it's the scripting or the words I'm saying to myself about the thing.

So as an example,

If I'm feeling down or whatnot,

I start thinking,

What are the thoughts I'm having about the thing I'm about to do or the task I'm about to have?

What are the thoughts exactly?

And now it comes quickler,

Quickler,

Quickly,

Quickler.

You just made up a new word.

It comes quickler to you.

New book title,

Quickler.

I love this.

Yeah.

Like what are the thoughts I'm having?

All right.

So you know what?

And I have to get really clear with what the thoughts,

Because here's the thing is the thoughts are so simple and it's not very complex.

It's super simple,

But it's,

You keep repeating the same thinking.

And what happens is that is literally the programming you have in your mind.

So it's say,

For example,

I have this for people who work.

So let's say at work I have a project coming up and I just keep telling myself,

I just don't want to do that.

I just don't want to do that.

I just,

I'm not feeling it.

I don't freaking want to do that.

And next thing you know,

Those statements just keep going on and on.

I just don't want to do that.

You know,

I just,

I'm not feeling it.

I can't stand it.

Oh my God.

And the more those thoughts happen,

The brain is saying literally,

Oh,

So what you're saying is you don't want,

Got it.

Okay.

So we don't want,

Right.

You don't want to do it.

Okay.

And the more you say,

I'm like,

I got it.

Don't want to do it.

The next thing you know,

You're sick.

Next thing you know,

You have a big flu.

Next thing you know,

You get to the thing or you do the task and it was miserable and it just confirms the fact that you didn't want to do it.

And so,

Right.

And so the thoughts is very,

It's a very,

Like I said,

Super like a light,

I would say like light or the best way to say is just these statements that we repeat over and over and over again.

So what happens is when you repeat those statements,

You start to feel a certain way.

Right.

And,

And,

And the feeling usually the core is,

You know,

I'm not good enough.

I can't do this.

I don't have the skill,

Whatever it is.

And it shows up in procrastination not,

Not wanting to actually do the task fear and so on,

So forth.

I'm like,

All right.

So I start paying attention to my feeling.

So then I started,

So it's almost like having a conversation with yourself.

And so the way the brain actually thinks is in words and emotions,

Sorry words and pictures and those words and pictures create an emotion.

So okay.

So if I am feeling this way,

So I started thinking when I started feeling like something down,

I'm like,

Why am I feeling down?

What's going on?

And I just kind of sit with myself a little while.

I'm like,

What is happening?

Like,

What is this feeling?

What's happening?

And I kind of search for that feeling in my body.

Like what's going on?

I'm like,

Oh,

And then all of a sudden a thought will come up.

I am not interested in it because I don't feel like I can be my full self.

I don't feel like I'm,

I'm,

I'm bringing all my creativity to the table.

Okay.

So what I'm trying to do here is become,

Be more creative.

Okay.

So what do I need?

I need to sort of communicate,

Have this dialogue back and forth with my mind.

And then once I set the tone as to,

Oh,

What I want,

What do I want?

Oh,

I want that part to be the best project ever.

I want that project for me to show up.

Like nobody's ever showed up before.

I want to deliver that thing.

Like I never delivered before.

And I start right.

Sort of seeing the statements like I am the best.

I'm the bomb damn diggity.

I tell you what,

I can do this quicker than anybody else.

Quickly.

This is amazing.

And as it happens,

Your endorphins going,

Your brain's like,

Oh,

Okay.

Got it.

This is what you want to do.

You're reprogramming your brain.

So reprogramming,

And so you're subconscious.

Yeah.

So,

So what I'm doing,

I have to consciously do it and then repeat it enough times.

And in,

In,

In a relaxed mental state so that your brain says,

Oh,

That's the new program.

So I have to override and you guys are programmers,

You know,

As you guys are it people,

You have to override the messaging.

So literally you have to decode the code,

Which you coded to begin with.

Right.

So you're,

You,

You slash,

And this is the best.

I've never been able to say this to other people because they were,

You know,

A semi colon slash slash whatever code,

Our brain works the exact same way.

It is all based on the words that we say,

Because the words are the software of,

Of what we actually want,

Which we actually operate.

We literally live constantly unconsciously because our unconscious mind is really what is what you're seeing before you.

So right now,

The way that I'm being,

The things that I'm saying is completely,

I don't have to think about what I want to say,

Because it is truly who I am based on the programming that I've you know,

That I previously have,

Have coded in.

So I realized I'm like,

Oh man,

It's all in my state.

So if I want to change the result,

I have to change the coding,

Which means I have to figure out what was the code to begin with.

Yeah.

Right.

And so this is part of the process that we do in hypnotherapy and hypnosis is helping people just kind of get into a state of relaxation to get into this unconscious mind to see what is going on,

What,

What,

What,

What,

What's the coding that's going on right there at the moment for that situation and then change it.

Everybody says,

Hey,

How do I do this?

It's literally the easiest way is to pay attention to how you feel.

Yeah.

If anything is how you feel and then be able to get specific about how you feel.

Oh,

I feel down.

What do you mean down?

Down?

Like how down?

Like what,

How would you describe that?

And the more the scriptures you have,

Your brain will eventually give you information to let you know this is what's going on because the feeling is the indicator of your thinking and starting to recognize the feeling like having the awareness.

Oh,

I recognize it.

And I talked to my students about the more you recognize it,

You know,

With repetition,

Practice,

Record.

Oh,

I see.

There it is again.

And you're going to start to really notice it and be able to really notice.

Yes,

You become,

Because essentially,

Uh,

And I'm a community,

So I can say this,

But,

But sometimes your thoughts become hecklers.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's like a heckler and you're like,

Uh,

You know,

I was doing,

I'm working here.

Like what?

What are you doing right now?

Right.

I mean,

Let me buy you a drink.

Sit down on your shoulder.

I'm a little guy.

I'm really,

I'm,

I really don't need you right now.

Right now is not the time,

But,

But the,

But then what I,

What I find is that no matter what those thoughts are,

It's like the clear I get there's information in it,

Right?

Like,

Okay,

Well I'm afraid of doing the,

Why am I afraid of doing what's going on?

What's what's really underneath there.

And then once I can get to the bottom of it,

I can say,

Okay,

Now let's reprogram.

And you can write it down.

You can write down the,

It's not just positivity is more,

What are the exact statements that if,

That if you can literally program your mind,

What would you want the statements to be?

This is where the power comes in.

So if you say,

Look,

I want these exact statements,

For example,

If I'm going to,

Let's say I'm going to do a show and it's not because I do a lot of shows,

I'm about to do a show and somehow I'm just not feeling the moment.

Like what's going on?

I'm like,

I start digging in.

I'm like,

Okay,

You know,

What's going on is that I don't feel fully prepared.

All right,

Great.

So how,

What can I do right now to,

To,

To change that feeling of preparedness?

Listen,

I rely on every bit of experience that lets me be amazing.

I rely,

It's almost like an affirmation.

I rely on every bit of experience to let me know that I can be amazing.

I can handle anything in any moment.

I can just improvise.

And I literally start just with people.

You're reprogramming in the moment then.

Okay.

In the moment.

And I get into a quiet,

Believe it or not,

A quiet mental state.

Really?

Thank you.

And just center my ushna.

I wish the listeners could see that.

That center as I call it,

My ushna means nothing.

The next book,

My ushna.

My ushna.

Center my ushna.

That's a great word,

I don't know where I came from.

What kinds of words today?

Yeah,

Right.

Center myself to have that moment.

But then what happens that the idea is that you'll,

You can also,

And I just tell people,

It's best to prepare prior to the event so that you can be ready for the event,

Right?

Like they say,

You know,

You got to get ready to be ready.

And so if I know something's coming up,

I can,

I can reprogram,

But it's really the reprogramming.

It's all around the words and the images.

Right.

So if the images,

Oftentimes the image of fear is much bigger and stronger for most people.

And so you have to kind of turn that around.

What does an image of being,

You know,

Showing up in that stage completely confident because my previous experiences will uphold me.

What does that look like?

What does that feel like?

And being really clear.

Another thing people can do,

And I'm not giving you guys a bunch of stuff,

But another thing people can do is that when you are feeling the feeling of ecstatic,

Being ecstatic of joy,

Of happiness,

No matter what it is,

When you're playing with the kids in the park,

Or like,

You know,

Laying on the grass.

Yeah,

I was gonna say laying on the grass.

James laying on the grass,

Those feelings,

You can literally what we call anchor that feeling in your body.

Right?

So,

So,

So you can,

You know,

When that moment is happening is you can put your thumb in your fore in your middle finger or your or your or your index finger and press it as if you're sort of anchoring that feeling in that spot.

And the more you feel it,

The more I can anchor and it's just it literally it does all it means is you're telling your brain I want to remember this feeling.

Because what happens is that when later you want to want to bring that feeling to something else attached to something else you can it's just the brain is just crazy cool.

And so you can attach any great feeling at any moment but when you're feeling this like if you go out country having a great time I will be like nobody knows I'm doing it just for myself.

I mean,

You know,

Do the finger I'll make,

You know,

Press on my shoulder wherever I want to remember myself of that feeling.

And then when I need it again,

I almost access it just by touching that space.

It's just it's incredible.

Oh,

I've never I've never heard that before.

I've heard of attaching to like an experience like that and sort of riding the wave of it to the fullest extent so that you can remember it.

I never heard of that where you can just sort of somatically do something to your body so that you can repeat that.

Yes,

Yes,

And anchor it and anchor it and then the moment you want to feel it you just you just press it like boom there it is.

And then and that's the neural pathways right creating newer pathways that remind your brain of what you want to feel.

And I'll be like,

Oh,

Remember this?

Oh,

Yeah.

And then in the moment remember it and attach to something like,

Oh,

Remember this feeling for when it has to work out.

Okay,

Great.

Got it.

And you know,

That's okay.

Right.

Good.

That's a feeling to something that you actually want.

Well,

Brooklyn,

I tell you,

We could talk to you literally all day.

We have to have you back.

Yeah,

Yeah,

We definitely have to have you back.

Great practical concrete stuff,

Which is the whole,

You know,

This is what this podcast is about.

And so we're so very,

Very grateful for you sharing those those techniques and sharing those ideas.

I'm going to go do them like now,

Because I feel really good right now.

I'm anchoring it right now.

Yeah,

Let's anchor this.

Anchors,

Yes.

We're all pressing our fingers together.

Yes.

So if our listeners,

I'm sure are going to want to work with you.

I'm sure they're going to want to get more of these really practical tips.

How do they find you?

How do they work with you?

Yes,

Great question.

First,

They have to decide in their mind.

Their biggest what I was just making some pins and needles like what you do is there a test they have to take?

They have to take a test and test on the emergency.

No,

The emotional broadcasting system.

No email,

Just drop me a line.

I mean,

I'm on email.

My email is join the party at the Happiness Consulting Company.

Join the party at the Happiness Consulting Company.

And they can also find me on Instagram at the Brooklyn experience.

There's a bunch of stuff I put out there all the time.

You can slide into my DMS.

That's a young term.

Slide into my DMS.

Yeah,

An email is easy enough.

I'm also on Facebook and a bunch of other stuff.

I'm sure if you Google my name,

Stuff comes up.

It does.

I googled you.

I googled you legally.

This is good.

But yeah,

That's how they find me.

And I'm more than happy to talk to people.

My biggest thing when it comes to folks who want to work with me is around truly it is their why.

Like why do they want this?

What is it?

What's going on in their life at the moment that they go,

This resonated with me and I want to know more.

And that's really the key is your and your interest in wanting to learn.

I'm a lifelong learner and that's really the key.

The people that I work with are people who successfully just want to learn,

Super curious and they want to figure out how to tap into their biggest potential fast.

I don't have a whole lot of time to like hang around.

So to me,

This is going to be quick.

It's going to be quick kids.

Any rapid transformation.

I don't have time.

I'm a busy person.

Can I do it over my break?

In my lunch hour?

You know,

That's what I want.

So I love your positive energy and I've always loved your unique way of bringing people together and you're just genuine kindness and everything.

Yeah,

You're one of a kind.

You are.

So I will add all of your contact information on our practical consciousness Facebook group that we have so that if you can go there and find you and we really just want to thank you for joining us and we're going to just sign off now and say goodbye.

Thank you so much.

Fantastic you guys.

Thank you for the opportunity.

All right.

We'll see you next time.