Spiritual Surgery

To become free of the ego, we have to be willing to take time out and accept a kind of emotional/psychological/spiritual surgery. (In the East this surrender of the Ego is symbolized by bowing to the Guru and touching their feet.) Currently, many masters speak of the bliss that comes at the end of the journey, but few mention just how hair-raising the transformational process can be. Premasudha speaks to us about what it was like to turn inwards, be with herself and allow herself to be recalibrated so that her Soul Gifts could come through.
Photo Credit: Judith Goltz

Transcript

So,

You know,

Amma talks about how we have to lie down for these operations.

Basically,

You know,

When the creator is lifting the ego out of you,

Or,

You know,

If you are lucky to be close to Amma and she's lifting the ego off you,

You can feel pretty weird.

And things can look dark.

So,

We can run into Netflix or grab the wine or the chocolate cake,

Or we could,

We can just go through this period.

We just go through this period of intense initiation.

Inner material comes up.

You keep praying,

You observe your life seeming to go sideways.

Maybe you,

If you're like me,

You would spend a lot of time lying down.

It is what I used to do.

I would lie down and just be with myself,

Be with my emotions,

My thoughts,

Or sometimes just be up all night,

Being with myself and praying,

Being with myself,

Writing things in my journal.

You know,

I couldn't fight it.

It was like being in a tornado of emotions and thoughts that I didn't really want.

And after that passed,

I would be lighter,

More love would come through me.

I would see more miracles,

Do you see?

And this happened over and over and over.

So,

Lots of times people come to me and they want to grow,

But really they're scared to be with themselves and they're scared to walk through one of these periods.

Now,

If we want the lotus awareness,

We have to learn how to go through these periods,

How to lie down and have an operation,

Basically.

Because if we don't do this,

We stay like weeds.

I mean,

We're nothing much,

Really.

Your connection to your soul will come through going through periods like this.

Now,

I'm not talking about what some people do,

Which is they just walk around in angst and depression and anxiety endlessly.

That isn't it at all.

That's not what I'm talking about.

You can waste your whole life in that.

Yeah,

No.

I mean,

Really letting your soul come into your body and into your mind.

Let your soul change you.

Let your soul shake you up and solve your problems.

Yeah.

Now,

I understand it's really hard for the mind to let go,

For our intellects to let go.

Because we can feel like if you're fighting it,

You can feel like you're going crazy,

But you're not.

In fact,

The less you fight these periods,

The less crazy you will feel.

Reviews

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷 Grateful for this support and teaching 🫶🏼🍀🦋🦄🐦‍🔥🌸

Wow thank you Janet. It's very helpful the way you explain being with yourself. Yes! Being with myself is a real thing. Part of the process of me learning to be with myself was first telling myself I would stay and not abandoned me. It seemed like that was the self trust I needed because it got a lot easier after that intentional promise. Sometimes I even offer myself compassion be visualizing I am leaning back into my own arms and resting against myself for support that feels intimate and loving. It sounds weird but the more I practice it the more accessible and embodied it becomes.