Our True 'Will' Can Move Mountains
Egos have will power but it is limited as it is just at ego level. Far beyond that, is our true *will* which can move mountains. The trouble is we are most often out of touch with it, asleep to its true power. Just listening to this satsang can cause an inner stirring because our true dharma/soul duty is to live in truth in our earth lives. Premasudha's words carry enormous power just because she faced extremely difficult spiritual challenges and the love within her heart triumphed. Truth always surfaces eventually because truth is God. So if we seek the truth inside, we are opening the door to the omnipotent Creator to express within our lives. It wins!
Transcript
Okay,
So I'm feeling a great return of soul energy right now.
There was huge amounts of material that came up before this satsang and I would have to speak really for eight hours to communicate the fullness of it.
So we're just going to distill it.
Yeah.
We'll distill it.
We'll let some of it just it's like it turns into an elixir or a nectar.
Uh huh.
That's what you guys really need.
You really need the nectar elixir level.
Because we're so in our minds.
So the elixir level,
The nectar level coming from a teacher helps us connect with our hearts.
And we so need it.
I know you know this.
We all know this.
Right.
That's it.
There's so much I want to say.
You know,
Back to our culture.
You know,
Jean-Paul Sartre talked about the spirit of seriousness and the iron in the soul.
Carlos Castaneda Don Juan being reported through Carlos Castaneda talked about self importance.
And it's this they're talking about the ego.
It's like spirit of seriousness,
The ego trying to do it right.
The iron in the soul.
I don't know.
And I'm sure we all know that feeling.
It says sometimes you're going through something and you just feel this heavy,
Ironed feeling within you.
Like dark,
Kind of dark,
But like iron heavy like iron.
I would feel I was feel things so physically.
And Carlos Castaneda would talk like Don Juan would say self importance was the thing that tripped everybody up all his students self importance.
And,
You know,
Aren't we like this,
It's just like a little kid,
Whose ego has formed over what feels like to them,
No love.
So they build a structure,
Sort of with a big backbone,
To kind of cope here.
And when that structure is threatened,
We push back because it's all we know.
Even though it's keeping us from the love that we are.
And that is where our self importance comes from.
And I'll tell you working with people,
First of all,
In myself,
Has this not been the biggest obstacle?
Yes.
Along with a spirit of seriousness?
Yes.
Like I say,
I didn't laugh for 10 years,
Really.
I didn't do a belly laugh for 10 years.
But it's also what this one finds in you guys.
Just like,
Come on,
We get over it,
Please.
Get it this life.
Don't come back.
Get it this life.
Yeah.
And then of course,
You guys do what I did too,
Which is Oh,
You're hurting me.
You're being mean.
It's like,
No,
I'm not.
I'm not at all.
Right.
I mean,
And you know that I know you know that you wouldn't turn up for satsangs unless you didn't know it.
But our egos are this little threatened,
Like six year old,
You know,
Who's going to school and trying to like,
Please the teacher and find a group of friends and you know,
And meanwhile,
For us in the outside world,
It's like shifting sands for how quickly change is occurring.
And Amma said,
I heard her say that after,
You know,
Everybody was worried about 2012,
Which then she said,
No,
Don't worry,
Things are going to stay the same till about 2015.
So that's about it.
Yeah.
And then since then,
It's been a bit of a roller coaster.
And,
You know,
It's likely it does continue to be a bit of a roller coaster.
Because,
Like I say,
I've said,
We've we've had all this time,
We've had 6080 years to bring in this higher consciousness.
And now we're integrating what we chose.
Okay.
Yeah,
I mean,
It's a little dis,
I mean,
It's a little sad.
I mean,
Basically,
We chose an intense focus on material things over over the heart.
And so this is what we've got now.
Okay,
Still.
It's like,
You know,
It's to see it clearly without getting defeated.
Because if you see it clearly,
You'll realize that there's no point holding on to the old way at all.
That the only real freedom and meaning comes with learning how to flow in this truer way.
And even if you bumble,
You can make terrible mistakes.
And if you're sincere,
The universe will pick you up.
Okay,
So I would sometimes because like I say,
I was an incredible egomaniac,
I would be climbing the mountain,
And I would have a terrible fall.
And I would be like,
It's all hopeless,
It's all lost.
And you know,
This was before I met Alma.
And then what would happen is I just get really humble.
I go,
Well,
I can't off myself,
I have to deal.
I've got responsibilities.
And I would get up again.
And the universe would lift me back up to where I was,
But higher than I had been to understand.
It's a little bit a little like bungee jumping.
It's your safe.
You're so safe,
Even if it seems that all is lost.
It's like a bungee jump.
Yeah.
Some of you look to look a little shocked.
I don't know whether it's this that I'm talking about,
Or what you're going through in your lives right now.
So I'm just gonna soothe you.
Like sending soothing energy.
Right.
Just turning up.
Your cells are opening to this love.
This is how the satsangs work.
Is your heart gets strengthened and your cells receive more love.
Even if your head doesn't won't know it for a while.
It may take time for you to realize what you've done actually.
It's the act of just turning up for satsangs that does it.
Even if you feel like you know the iron in the soul.
If that's really up for you doesn't matter.
The love is still coming through.
Just by turning up.
Just by turning up,
You've got a yes to receive this and it will solve your mind in a way over time,
Just like Amma talks about pouring fresh water into a glass of salt water.
Finally,
The glass becomes fresh.
Yeah.
Some of you are a little disheartened.
I sure know that feeling.
I know what that's like.
It's temporary.
You know,
When the soul's on the move,
The mind will get very busy.
The thoughts will come very thick.
Because when our thoughts are really thick,
The heart stops producing an enzyme,
Which affects our thoughts.
Okay,
So when we're peaceful,
Our hearts will be releasing an enzyme that allows for the heart's input to come into our thoughts.
When we're stressed,
And our minds are very busy,
This enzyme stops.
And you know,
It's the fight or flight thing.
If a saber tooth tiger is coming at us,
We can't be busy saying om or feeling.
But you guys,
The thing is,
You see,
We're in that state a lot of the busy mind.
And that's why the meditation is so important.
The practice of meditation so that you learn how to still your mind,
At least somewhat.
So this so your heart can have an impact on your thoughts.
So I feel like we're circulating around in your heads a little bit.
And like,
Merry go round.
I don't know if any of you ever feel like that,
That your thoughts are like a merry go round and you get on it,
You jump on it,
And then you're going round and round in these thoughts.
And where we're all wanting to,
To be and go is to this dropping down into our hearts.
And that's,
That's where we're going.
Good.
Good.
It's interesting.
It's as if we've been doing this long enough that there's a level of trust building,
And you're moving into your hearts more quickly than you used to.
By a long shot.
Yeah.
It's very good.
That's it.
That's it.
May you have more space to feel in this satsang and beyond it.
And for anybody who listens to the satsang afterwards,
May you have more room to feel.
You know,
There's an Eastern story about this where somebody fell off a cliff.
And as they fell,
They grabbed hold of a bush on the way down.
And they looked down,
It was like there were several thousand feet to fall and just rocks,
There was no chance of getting out of there alive.
They grabbed onto this bush,
And then they looked up and they saw a strawberry.
And they reached and got the strawberry and ate it,
Tasted it.
And they were just present in the moment with how great the strawberry tasted.
Okay,
This is a beautiful picture of us in life.
Okay,
We're all gonna die.
But it's like,
How much can we just stay present and enjoy the strawberry.
To stay present to be present with the strawberry,
You have to know what love is,
You have to receive unconditional love.
It is love that brings you into the present.
Right?
It's like Amma says,
What she likes is when we say our mantra when we're receiving a hug.
You know,
It's like,
That's a situation then where we're making ourselves present,
To really feel the full benefit of her hug.
That's it.
It is safe to be present with yourselves.
You know,
The great thing about getting older is the you know,
The fall of the 3000 feet onto the rocks becomes a lot less scary.
You're getting closer to the like fall,
You know,
So it's like,
Man,
Let's have the strawberry.
So compassion with yourself if you're younger.
Okay,
But still,
The focus on being present because when I when I work with you guys individually,
You know,
What comes up is this belief in your mind's material.
You believe your mind and it's baloney.
It is baloney.
All you have to do is actually surrender to truth to have a completely different worldview.
Surrender into truth to get off this merry-go-round and be able to travel through life in a in a more meaningful way in a in a deeper way.
And you guys,
It's through feeling.
So when your minds are so busy and everything,
You are repressing your feeling,
Which is coming from your soul to let you know about things.
Like,
You know,
That's how I work with you.
And if if we're speaking on the phone,
I will get the feeling of what you need to understand the feeling of what I need to say.
And it's just clear as day.
But it's not coming from my head at all.
It's it's it's coming from my heart really,
Through this feeling.
And what I've learned is that solves everything.
You know,
The challenge of dealing with our minds is our minds don't give up without a fight.
So it's how much can you step back from the fight of your mind and witness it?
Just step back and witness it.
As opposed to believing that your mind's content is you.
Because it's not.
Your mind is expressing your conditioning.
It's not you.
And it takes time.
Okay,
There's more on Carlos Castaneda.
And this is kind of hilarious.
So and this is why I love the more the spiritual training in simpler societies,
Like with the Hawaiian thing that I did with Abraham,
But you know,
In Mexico,
It was at that time,
It was pretty simple.
So Carlos Castaneda had been shot or stabbed,
Or I can't remember,
Or Don Juan had been stabbed a shot.
I can't remember what the what the problem was,
But his benefactor or teacher came along and carried him to the house and basically saved him.
So the the shamanic training started then.
So Carlos,
Who was a very macho kind of guy,
Was told that he had to wear women's clothes.
And in Mexico,
Certainly at that time,
Women were like pushed down a lot.
So this was a big deal,
You know.
But,
You know,
We could think with some intelligence,
We go,
Okay,
So the wearing women's clothes would be helping him understand the woman's perspective,
The woman's experience,
It'd be help him understand the other side of his polarity.
So he wandered around in the women's clothes,
And he got treated,
Like,
Badly by the men in the group,
Who did all the stuff to him that,
You know,
Guys traditionally over time have done to women,
Like pinched his bottom and were rude and everything anyway.
So Carlos got,
Or Don Juan got a big education.
And at the same time,
He was told that there was a monster at the edge of the property,
I can't remember how big the property was.
But there was a terrible monster that would eat him if he got a chance,
If it got a chance.
So for a year,
Carlos lived dressed in women's clothes,
And terrified about this monster,
Which he saw with his own eyes,
He saw it.
Okay.
You know,
Eventually,
They took him out of this house and his training progressed.
But the thing is,
There was no monster.
But he saw it,
Because he was actually seeing his monstrous ego,
Do you understand?
So he's brought into women's clothes.
And he's told about this monster.
So he's in a situation where this,
This is what our,
Our ego feels like,
During spiritual training.
Okay,
Some of you are clicking off,
Okay,
You don't want to face this.
And I'll tell you,
If you don't want to face this,
You're not going to get very far on your journey.
Okay,
Like,
Push comes to shove,
You won't.
Because you really have to see what you're up against in order to transcend it.
Yeah,
So there was no monster,
Carlos was just seeing a picture of his own conditioning.
Yeah,
This is kind of you're shocking a bit,
But you guys.
This is,
This is what it's like.
I mean,
This is why the spiritual journey is challenging.
Because it's like it,
Our ego does kind of come up in a monstrous way to try to push us back into line back into our little playpen of experience.
But it's like,
All you have to do is taste the strawberry.
Like,
If you allow yourself to taste the true energy of your heart,
The true energy behind you.
This is what neutralizes the ego.
You just grow beyond it.
There's no rush to do this.
You guys are a bit shocked.
I probably would have been to really,
If somebody had said this,
I'm just kind of wanting to help you get your mind around this,
At least intellectually.
So that,
You know,
If it you feel like you're up against a monstrous challenge,
That that your heart will be strengthened by remembering the sad saying,
You know,
There's a woman I've talked about,
Emma Koch,
Who's sung,
Voila,
With the Johann Strauss orchestra.
And she,
If you look for it on YouTube,
I might send it to you again,
I think I've sent it to you.
She reduced these men to absolute tears,
They just melted.
She got this.
The women did too.
And she got this incredible standing ovation.
Okay,
Her story is,
She's small,
Underdeveloped,
Physically,
She has a paralyzed stomach.
She when she went to school,
She's totally bullied,
Because she's small,
And she has to like,
Pipe in food to her stomach.
And yet this young girl has set up a foundation to cure the disease she's got.
And she sings like this nightingale,
She's got all this soul power in her voice,
Coming from her pain,
Basically,
That she faced,
And she is bringing,
Like,
That she faced this pain,
And this big trust in life,
And she's bringing it,
And we hear it,
And it informs ourselves,
And we go,
Yes,
Somebody's rising up,
Somebody's transcending difficulty.
And it strengthens us,
It strengthens our cells of our body,
Her example strengthens us.
Yeah.
Right.
Anybody who speaks from having,
Or sings,
Or does artwork from having faced great difficulty and transcending them,
It has a power that is communicated to the cells of our body.
Now,
You guys,
You know me,
I'm like,
Really interested in the male and female aspect.
So understand that this comes through the female polarity of human existence,
This ability to rise up no matter what happens.
Okay.
It's like,
The experience of women,
You may be in,
Like,
You know,
The British Isles,
And the,
You know,
The invaders come,
The Vikings,
They kill your partner.
And you,
You've got little kids,
You have to be there for them.
And you deal with the new regime,
Without giving up hope,
Continuing to have the faith to raise your children,
Even though the regime's changed.
You just keep going.
This comes from the feminine in you guys.
Okay.
Both are incredibly value,
You cannot,
You know,
The thing Amma says,
The he is inside the she.
But another way of saying it is without the he,
There's no she.
You know,
So we need both.
But this transcendence comes from the feminine aspect.
So let it rise in you.
You know,
You know,
Amma says,
Women,
The biggest need is for women to wake up,
And that women are caught in their minds.
Okay,
So we miss this transcendent flow that we're capable of,
Particularly.
That's it.
And it's inside the guys.
But we really need this now.
And the universe is always supporting you.
Okay,
So I'm spelling all this out.
And at the same time,
It's this feeling in you,
The deep knowing in you.
That is the key.
So it's not a to do thing that I'm saying,
I'm just shining a light.
There's no prescription,
Or you must do this or anything like that.
It's like when you see the terrain,
You know how to navigate.
When you see clearly,
You can see what's how to,
You know,
Walk forward.
Yeah,
There's some of you that are feeling emotionally left behind.
And,
You know,
You know,
The thing this one was so good at was embracing myself no matter what,
You know,
I really knew nobody else could save me.
And,
You know,
Even with Ama,
I knew that she was watching me and loving me and giving me tips kind of,
You know,
She would,
You know,
In her hugs,
She's communicating to us.
But I really knew that it was the desire of this one to move into truth that was the only thing that was going to work.
Yeah,
It was the only thing that's going to work.
And on the way,
I saw so much ego that grossed me out over and over again,
Over and over again,
In myself.
And it just became the way I lived was seeing this crap in myself and praying and doing my best to help others and be kind to the people I met.
And progress just got made.
It's like progress got made.
It's like being lifted up the mountain.
You just get lifted up the mountain,
You get lifted up to a bigger understanding.
Even though it feels like,
Oh,
You're trying,
You know,
You're trying so hard,
But really,
Something beyond you lifts you.
I want to read an email from somebody who has,
She's at a point in her life where she has a very innocent heart.
And at the same time,
She's been in the past stuck in her conditioning.
But she's found a doorway to be able to move forward.
And I want to read the email.
And it's,
It's not that I'm saying,
Oh,
Here's an A student,
Because,
You know,
All of us,
We have breakthroughs,
And then we get stuck in ego.
We have breakthroughs,
Sometimes,
Like Amma,
Sometimes removed people from my life,
Because I was never going to move into truth if they stayed,
If I stayed with them,
And I could not do it myself.
So they just got removed.
Like sometimes the teacher will just or God or the Creator just just solves it,
They just know that you're going to be stuck there for like 200 lifetimes.
So they like do something to really help you.
So please don't,
When I read the email,
Don't go,
Oh,
I could never write like that.
Or why am I doing it wrong?
Don't do that.
Just let what she did.
Come in,
May this free you.
Okay.
So I just have to look for it.
Okay,
So often,
I wake up with a random song in my head.
Obviously,
Not so random,
As I believe there is always greater meaning behind them.
This morning,
I woke up to True Colors by Cyndi Lauper.
More specifically,
Don't be afraid to let them show your true colors are beautiful,
Like a rainbow crying.
I had that familiar heavy feeling of sadness,
Settling in my heart when I first opened my eyes.
So I immediately sat still and started saying my mantra and pushed aside the song,
Okay,
Just want you to notice,
Like,
Lots of people we wake up heavy in the morning.
And what she did is she started to say her mantra,
Like she took an action.
You just take an action.
You make room to receive Creator.
In this case,
She pushed aside the song.
Okay,
The heaviness began to lift and I felt somewhat lighter.
Once I started my morning routine,
I realized the true meaning behind that song.
I need to embrace my uniqueness,
Love and accept all my colors,
Lean into my feelings,
Even the wonky,
Sometimes uncomfortable ones.
I use the term wonky,
Because sometimes that's exactly how I feel.
It wasn't until after I settled into my mantra,
But this all became clear to me.
Just wanted to share.
Okay.
Now,
The innocence,
Do you see,
She was flowing along with the innocence so she could flow along with the change in understanding.
And again,
What she did was,
You know,
When she woke up,
And she had this song,
Okay,
She did what a lot of students do,
You know,
They push it away.
They'll go like,
That's wrong,
Push it away.
But actually,
It was just giving her a message,
A really,
Really important message from her subconscious.
Okay,
But she finally got there after she said her mantra.
So she found the will to say her mantra.
And the will brought the that will that wanting this knowledge brought her to understand that the song was a message from her soul.
Right?
It's this you guys,
It's this very,
Very delicate thing.
And,
You know,
As a teacher,
I can tell you about Carlos Castaneda and all this to give you the overview to help you surrender to this kind of level.
This level of just your direct experience,
Your personhood,
Your selfhood,
What your soul is wanting you to understand that the non dual people would call this self attention.
This is what works.
Self attention,
Noticing,
Noticing.
Yeah.
And the true colors,
You know,
That's what this training is,
Just to help you into your true colors.
To help you just be that.
You know,
It depends,
You know,
If if you,
You know,
Maybe had a lot of spiritual lives where you did a lot of homework,
You know,
In this life,
You might have just like,
One kilo of garbage to clear,
Where you might have like,
Huge amounts,
Like this one.
Doesn't matter.
It's like,
You will come into the true colors of your soul energy at some point.
This life,
Next life.
Don't worry about it too much.
Just get interested in the being the beingness.
Notice what you wake up with.
Don't fight things.
You know,
Really up to do.
I didn't fight things like this.
I just embraced all my kind of craziness,
You know,
And I saw the meaning or the I saw the gift of it later.
Don't you guys,
It's one of the biggest obstacles when I'm working with you.
You're all trying to do it right and be good,
You know.
It's like a woman who's giving birth worrying about whether the noises she's making are pretty.
If there's,
You know,
Blood,
She doesn't want to mess,
You know,
And it's like,
You can't give birth like that.
You just get it.
We're just ourselves.
You know,
If this satsang gives you even an infinitesimal amount of permission to be yourself,
Even just a little an inch.
It's good.
Yeah,
So when you wake up in the morning,
If you're feeling blue,
Just start your mantra.
Not fighting being blue,
Not pushing it away.
Just opening the door to the creator,
Opening the door to the to your soul.
Like,
So you're feeling crummy,
You still still say,
I believe in you soul,
I'm going to say my mantra,
You know,
Just keep saying it.
And the other thing you guys,
You know,
That I'm a highlights a lot,
May all the beings in all the worlds be happy.
When you think like that,
You let a love you let a lot of love come to you.
It's like,
When you allow the focus,
The loving focus to be on everything,
You and your whole family line,
Get the love as a result.
You see,
Sometimes we might pray for us and our family line.
And that's good.
But if you focus on the best for everyone,
Then everybody gets it.
Just do your best with that egos will tend to,
You know,
Go,
Oh,
I don't have the juice for this.
I've got the juice to pray for my family.
But just,
Again,
Just work with that.
Okay.
So remember,
We're going to go over because I'm going to have questions soon.
So remember,
Just if you have to go,
Just bless your heart and just just go,
But I'll just stay for as long as I'm feeling that basically I'm a wants me to be here.
There's a level where you guys I can feel where you're cut off in your cells,
Like where your cells are not allowing the love in.
So I'm just Yeah,
Okay,
Good.
Okay.
You see,
Just by shining a light on this that is occurring really deep in your subconscious,
But just the light coming,
Because this one has such experience with such depth in her own unconscious to understand.
So when I speak something,
When I see something,
There's a love power to it that melts these resistances.
So part of you,
Okay,
There's some some hold a withhold about not feeling it can be so easy,
But you see,
It really depends on how,
How much you want this knowledge,
You see,
The more you want this knowledge,
The more it will come to you.
And the more power it will have to get through your conditionings.
Yeah,
You're the point of power,
Not not anybody else.
But you're the point of power.
I know there was a lot in this sad saying a lot to take in,
But that's it.
That's good.
Yeah.
Very good.
I'm feeling a softening.
Right.
Yeah,
You deserve to be loved.
It's around you're deserving to be loved.
You guys.
Yeah.
All of you deserve it.
It's your birth right.
Yeah.
You are love.
You deserve to be loved.
You deserve to receive it.
That's it.
That's it.
Okay,
I'm seeing some funny I'm seeing some scared cold three year olds.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Love.
Love.
Love.
I'm picking them all up.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's it.
It's like I've got you all right.
And part of you will be feeling part of you will relax because actually I spoke to the level that you were needing the help.
So part of you gets Oh,
Okay.
It's safe.
Okay,
There's one more thing I want to say.
Okay.
You know how Alma says every night we go back to the Creator basically the whole universe dissolves.
We go back to the Creator.
We plug in.
We merge.
Okay.
And then we create the universe again.
So that it's got continuity.
Okay.
Do you understand this is a metaphor for Alma's hugs.
So we go for hugs and from the physical Alma.
But at night at night,
Our soul is giving us a hug.
Now,
As I proceeded and I experienced now that this whole life my experience is just I'm in a dream.
Okay,
So this is really like,
Not a problem for me like that.
Like,
That's my experience.
So now,
It's easy for me to think of,
You know,
Going back to the Creator every night and the universe dissolving.
It doesn't seem difficult to me.
It's of course,
It's like that.
Because we're in a dream.
So my point is that every night,
You plug into truth.
And for those who know Alma,
We get to get hugs.
Right?
We're well cared for.
We're well taken care of.
Yeah.
And when you get that,
When you get how much you love and taken care of,
You basically get in line.
That's what happens.
You just go,
Oh,
Oh,
Oh,
Nevada,
You just experience your soul and you just experience the bliss.
Mm hmm.
Because it's not being walled off by your ego.
Okay,
So questions or comments?
Prima Sutta Trilochan here.
Yes.
Maybe,
You know what the,
The first thought which came in my crazy mind came when you said the last thing,
You know,
What we experience,
What happens at nighttime.
Intellectually,
I know that,
Right?
What I'm saying,
Go back to the Creator.
But what do I experience every morning when I wake up?
I say,
Oh,
Good.
You know,
I'm quite a happy person and all but still I wake up.
And somehow it feels I'm waking out up out of bliss,
Even I'm not feeling feeling it.
Right.
It makes me feel like I'm falling out of something really supreme and out of bliss.
And I have to go through another day,
Even I'm not living an unhappy life,
I would say,
But it's exactly the opposite.
That's what I'm trying to say.
That's what I'm experiencing exactly the opposite.
Right.
So my question is,
What are you going to do about this?
One,
One small hint.
I took with me,
Hey,
It could be a good idea to start directly chanting my mantra,
Which is a new thing for me today.
I normally try to sit shortly in meditation in my bed and try to have awareness on my body and look outside to be a little bit in alertness and awareness.
But I thought,
Okay,
Maybe it's nice to try that mantra as a first thing in the as a first thing in the morning.
Yeah,
It's like Amma says that the creator watches how many times we count how many times we say our mantra,
You know,
That she said,
I heard her that if you do it for three years,
You can become enlightened.
If you do it three years solid,
Like we know this,
Our ego just like steers us away,
Though.
We go up too much trouble.
It doesn't work.
It's like it works.
Truly,
Chen.
I think this is your issue that you need to bring more will to climbing out of this distress you're in.
Do you see out of what out of out of the distress you're in?
Yeah.
So I know you've got a happy temperament,
But it's like,
You could come to more peace with by really grabbing hold that,
You know,
Love is there and you can be helped into a higher understanding and you can,
Your soul can lift you up into it.
Because part of you is just really used to the storyline.
And this is our problem.
We get used to it.
But it's just a matter of that will.
I'm growing beyond this.
I don't want to spend my life like this.
But it's not fighting,
Fighting or distress.
It is not fighting.
It's just I'm,
I'm doing it this life,
Not another life.
Right?
Yeah.
So it's your mantra,
But to get like,
I want to make it really clear.
Sure,
There's a practice of saying the mantra when you wake up.
But the most important thing is that Trilla Chan's will is you're grabbing hold of I'm going higher.
You see,
If you say your mantra with that,
It will really work.
If you say your mantra with,
Oh,
I'm going to try this.
And this is another technique that's going to fail.
Right.
Okay,
I'm sending you a lot of love.
Part of you shrinking.
So I'm just sending you a lot of love.
You see,
This is it.
We're scared to use our will.
We're scared.
We're scared to say I want because we because or I will to move in truth because we're scared our egos going you're not good enough.
You're too flawed.
You can't have it.
But you can.
Look,
You're speaking to like an absolutely crazy person who was written off by everybody.
And this,
I chose this.
So please don't tell me you can't do stuff.
I was impoverished,
Crazy,
Lost my home,
Lost my husband,
My family didn't visit me like I was totally in separation from all that was.
And I just turned and faced it.
Yeah.
Right.
And you know,
The great gift of having an extreme experience like I had,
It's very freeing,
Because it makes it really clear.
It's like either I was going to be a marginal,
Crazy woman,
Or I was going to transcend this.
Well,
That's the great thing of it.
Thing of it.
So for lots of us,
It's like we're in,
You know,
Lukewarm water.
You know,
Emma says,
Like,
If you put a some kind of sea animal in water,
And you heat it gently,
They they die without realizing that they're in trouble.
So this is what happens to us.
It's like we're,
We're in this warm water,
It feels kind of comfortable,
But we're in the death energy.
And we're not moving into truth.
And this is this.
Yeah.
Is that the thing you just wanted to share?
You said something,
You started something,
It sounded so amazingly important,
And then you froze.
Do you remember what it was?
It's exactly this,
You started like really getting Wow,
Excited.
And then you're frozen.
I think after the lukewarm water.
Yeah,
You guys,
You would not be here if you weren't sincere about receiving help to get out of the lukewarm water,
Basically,
To awaken,
You would not be here.
Okay.
You wouldn't it is scalpel work.
It's just,
You see,
The most of us are stuck in bad and good.
And that's where our spiritual journeys stagnate.
We try to be good spiritual students,
Instead of realizing that we're we've fallen off a cliff,
And we're grabbing hold of the strop of those bush to save us.
And we,
We're,
You know,
Those bush to save us,
And we can enjoy the strawberry.
How do I explain it?
There's something I really wanted to say earlier,
And it's connected with,
Okay.
Okay,
You guys.
There's levels of love,
Like there's the basic nurturing,
You know,
The adult with a little kid.
That's just pretty much instinctive.
Then there's family bonds.
Then there's a club bond,
You know,
Especially like,
Think of England,
You know,
The,
The guys,
The club was a big thing.
It was status,
It was company.
Then beyond that,
There's kindness,
You go higher,
Then there's compassion.
And at the final top is just agape,
Like unconditional love.
And really,
The compassion comes from that too,
But it's just more taking an action.
But the unconditional love is just sort of somebody like,
Think of like the floating on a cloud of just God's love.
Okay,
In our spiritual journeys,
Okay,
This is an obstacle,
We join a club.
Okay,
We've got a certain religion,
We've got a certain teacher,
We're in a club.
This keeps us this can keep us staying in that kind of safety and being kind of in the bad and good thing.
Rather than going up higher to compassion and agape.
This is what I'm you know,
Okay,
Here it is.
I put up these,
Do you know,
Lukeman offered to put up these little shorts for me.
So he's doing that one of them is the,
You know,
We're,
We're all part of the creator.
Like if you're,
If you're remembered,
Like people who remember the part of the creator,
Become better people.
It's like,
If you think about Alma,
You will you will become a better person.
Okay,
So somebody wrote to me and said,
Well,
That's okay,
As long as Jesus Christ is your savior,
Then it's okay.
Okay,
There is the club.
Okay,
The club so much smaller than the big understanding of we're,
We're God in human form.
We're part of Alma.
This is,
And the ego loves this club thing.
It's wilder.
It's like,
You know,
The spiritual journey can feel like that you're this little plant who's sprouting and growing on kind of a rocky ledge of a mountain.
It can feel like that.
But if you keep going,
It will be that you,
You realize that you are in the promised land,
Where love wins.
And love is always going to win.
And the soil is fertile.
And it's very,
Very beautiful.
And if it's not that way,
It's just your ego blocking it.
You know,
The thing with spiritual teachers,
They talk about people being asleep.
That's you don't realize,
This is your time to grow.
This is it,
Who knows what it's going to be like after.
You know,
This,
You know,
In times like this,
Spiritual teachers come,
And then they make a big change.
And then it's for us to then do it.
It's like Christ came and brought the whole,
This whole new loving,
Comforting energy instead of the,
The Old Testament.
And then,
You know,
Christ died.
And then it's for it was for us to then bring this bigger understanding and heart into our world.
So Amma is here right now.
So she's,
You know,
When these people when these transcendent souls are,
Or infinite souls are here,
All of us are enhanced just by their presence.
We're more capable of love because they're here.
And when they go,
We're like,
Okay,
We got to do it.
So do it now.
And all I'm talking about is really what this lovely woman wrote,
That she was present with herself in the morning.
And the thing about her is she,
She received love from this one in a very deep way.
She came to me from Insight Timer.
And she was really open.
She was kind of at the end of the line.
She really received the love coming through this one.
And so she's made this huge shift into her innocence,
Saving her lifetimes.
But you know,
We can't,
You know,
We can't go like,
Well,
I'm like,
There's something wrong with me because I'm not doing this.
Don't do that.
Don't do that.
It's like,
It's not in your control anyway.
But I just want to read you her example of she really let me get through to you to her.
Lots of times when I speak to you guys,
Even on the phone,
You're not really letting me get through to you.
But it's okay.
I know.
I mean,
I get it.
But next time we speak or the next set saying you could think well,
I really want to let premise you to get through to me.
That's bringing your will in.
Yeah,
That's bringing your will in.
That's what I'm talking about.
Bring your will in.
Yeah,
Lots of us we don't even know that we've got this will premise I have a question.
Yeah.
So when you were talking about that,
And her being blue,
And you said,
You know,
You do your mantra,
But you're not trying to change it.
And so I'm having a hard time understanding,
Like,
Bringing the will in and doing the mantra,
But not trying to change.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Can you talk that?
Yeah,
Yeah,
Yeah.
It's most of us we Thanks.
Good question.
You guys,
We have to deepen in order to be able to feel that deeper well.
Okay.
So yeah.
Most of us say you're working at like,
10 levels.
But maybe your will is on level 30.
Your true will is way deeper.
So yeah.
So what you can do is you can say,
Well,
I want to be brought to understand the whole issue of will,
Of my will.
You can pray for that you can say,
Okay,
I'm really interested in finding out what my,
My deeper will have access to my deeper will.
And now you will be brought to that.
But what will happen is,
It will,
It will tend to dislodge your ego,
You see,
Your ego will be threatened by this.
So when you do things like that,
You have to say,
Okay,
I want it at a highest good pace that I can handle.
And,
And maybe,
You know,
If the time is right,
Amma will send you like a lucid dream,
Some big dream,
Some big catalytic event,
Inner event that solves it.
Or you can,
You could be in a situation you could where you use your will,
Physically.
Say you're chopping wood,
And you,
It's not going well.
And you go,
I'm really going to chop it.
And the trunk splits.
Okay,
You can have the physical experience of getting down to your will.
And that will help too.
It's why in traditional shamanic training,
They use physical challenges,
It's so people can access this level of the deeper will.
Okay,
So when I was sick,
And I stayed with this woman,
She let me come in.
And she said to me,
After about a month,
She said,
You'll get better when you decide to.
And I had no sense that I was that this was my decision to be sick at all.
But after a month,
I just effortlessly one day went,
Okay,
I'm,
I'm going to get better.
And I wrote a letter to universe and said,
Within six months,
I want to be able to pick up my kids.
Okay,
That.
And then in six months to the day,
I was picking up my kids,
And I had forgotten about it.
You see,
Okay,
You could write a letter to the universe saying,
Within six months,
I want to know what my will is,
And give me all the support that I need.
And make it safe for me to do this.
You have to think before you set something like this in motion,
You have to think about whether you're really,
Really,
Really ready to do it,
To face it.
And another thing you can do is you can start that process.
And if it gets too intense,
You can say,
Okay,
It needs to be slower.
Slow,
Slow it down.
I can't handle the speed of this.
And even doing that is a use of your will.
Do you see what I mean?
You're telling the universe to slow down.
So you can't deal with it quite yet.
Okay,
I have a question right here.
Yes,
Please.
Okay.
So it's about the I am meditation.
Oh,
And hello,
Everyone.
Thank you.
About the I am meditation.
Yeah,
You hear me?
Okay.
Yeah,
A bit louder.
If you can be a bit louder.
Can you hear me better?
Yeah,
That's better.
Thanks.
Yeah.
Okay.
I'm adjusting the volume on my phone.
It's already full blast.
Okay,
Good.
So you're right.
Yeah.
If you can hear me,
That's all that matters.
Yeah.
So two days ago,
I was doing the I am meditation and in a part where the ice cold running water is happening.
Yeah,
I was shivering.
And I let it happen.
And I was colder and colder and colder and colder and colder.
And it felt so good.
Like I know it's purification.
And I know it's wonderful.
And I've never been this far.
So far in the meditation.
I'm used to raising energy that feels like heat.
So I was actually delighted to have that cold.
It just it felt so good.
But then what's your yesterday?
What's your question?
I went to do it.
Yesterday,
I went to begin the beginning of the meditation.
And there was so much heat.
I had to stop immediately power down.
It frightened me.
That's my question to you.
To speak to that.
Am I doing this to become this?
See,
I think you're getting in there and kind of fighting the process.
You know,
I mean,
The heat,
You know,
Sometimes the heat if it's really hot,
It can be anger,
Unconscious anger coming up.
And the cool,
Maybe to just,
You know,
Calm it down so that it's not going to come up for a big eruption.
It will just be easy to be.
So we're integrated.
Okay,
So you see,
When you decided that you,
You know,
The cold and you got interested in the shiver and everything.
And you got like,
Oh,
Good,
You got in there,
You set up action of this increased anger,
Because you got in there and judged it and got in there,
Just,
Just,
Just follow the directions just without,
Like getting in there.
Okay,
This is what our egos do our egos get in there,
And we make little messes.
It's like,
It's like a little pile of,
You know,
Like a little kid who pulls down their pants and poos in the corner where they shouldn't,
You know,
It's kind of like that we get in there and we add our poop to it.
Did it just?
Yeah,
Observing.
Observing.
Yeah,
Sweet.
That's a very good question.
And Jen,
Yours was a very good question,
Too.
This is great.
And does any,
Is there any,
Jen,
Did that answer the question?
Is there any clarification you need?
Um,
I'm still,
I'm like,
Kind of working it through,
Like,
It's getting clearer,
As you talk,
So I still kind of felt like so I'm thinking of that two by two square,
You mentioned in the past,
And like,
You can go on the square and can feel all your emotions,
Right?
And like allowing that to happen.
And I'm,
I'm still in a little bit of a almost like ascertaining,
You know,
When do I go deep with the emotions?
Or when is it kind of like,
Bringing the will in,
But I think when I sub will for power,
It gets a little bit clearer.
So I'm still unclear.
And that's okay.
But that's bubbling up.
Okay,
Yeah.
And,
Um,
Yeah,
And I may be giving you guys like actually too much information.
Like,
You see,
Because the thing is to just be yourselves,
Okay?
You see how we the last question is,
Like,
How do we fix and alter things?
It's we're like this,
We,
Our heads will go,
How do we fix and alter things?
Are we doing it right?
Is this the best technique to get this results?
It's like you guys,
The big technique is to just be yourselves.
You start with you and your value.
Your,
Your,
All of you,
I'm speaking to your souls.
I'm speaking to your bodies,
But I'm speaking to your souls,
Your souls are in your bodies.
I have another question that maybe is about her question.
Also,
Is it a fear of being manipulative?
We're supposed to energy it's supposed to,
We're supposed to shift from elevator up from the elevator down up.
I,
I,
I think being able to manipulate energy is also about changing my mind and choosing a better way.
And so I don't want to get caught in the grip of dark manipulation.
If you could speak to that.
You know,
You think of a,
Okay,
So what kind of mom do you want to be?
Do you want to be a mom who loves the energy of her children who wants their well being?
Or do you want to be a mom who's got the child in all kinds of courses,
Busy from day you know,
School and then all kinds of lessons after and that the child is given the,
The experience of okay,
You're,
You're,
Who you are isn't good enough,
But you've got to like jump through these hoops.
Okay,
This is what almost all of you do with the journey.
You're like the mom with her idea of what the child needs to do in order to be acceptable.
Okay,
So I never talk about manipulating energy,
Ever.
I don't even talk about moving energy.
I those terms are so low level,
Sweetie,
Don't play there.
Play there play with like,
I'm a divine being in human form.
See your mantra,
Focus on your heart,
Try to be kind to other people.
Notice if you're being too hard on yourself,
And the Creator will lift you up the mountain.
Yes,
I understand.
And I'm speaking to that.
Even chanting a mantra is shifting energy in a way.
And so I'm trying to dial back.
I'm trying to get down to zero.
I'm surrendering everything.
It's not shifting,
I'd argue,
I don't think it's shifting energy.
And that's my question.
I don't understand it.
Yeah,
You just when you say your mantra,
You're opening the door.
You are saying I am willing to open and listen and allow the Creator's energy to come in.
It's the difference between not,
Michael,
I'll get to you in just a sec.
It's a difference between not having the will or the energy to say the mantra,
And or having the desire to reach the Creator and open to the Creator and live in truth,
That you actually find the energy to say your mantra.
It's,
Yeah,
I don't.
It's a word that I woke up with this morning.
And I'm trying to understand where it came from.
Manipulation.
Okay,
Good.
So just make that make that your point of focus,
Like go,
Okay,
Universe,
I really want to understand this about,
You know,
Manipulation of the energy or how to how to grow however you want to put it and then just notice the data that comes through.
And if you listen to the SAT saying again afterwards,
All of you will understand more.
But it's a very good question.
Sri Lakshmi.
It's a very good question.
It's very good point of curiosity.
Okay.
Michael,
You had a question.
Yeah,
You know,
It picks up a little bit on I guess what we're talking about.
But I find it really fascinating to move from the to do to the to be back to the to do,
You know,
It's like back and forth.
And I find that when,
You know,
I talked about my will and what I want.
And,
You know,
Reach higher.
You know,
That's the to do side.
And that's okay,
Sometimes.
And then it's like,
And then,
You know,
Sometimes I'll be,
You know,
Walking and looking for that empty space or repeating my mantra.
And that's my to be side.
And Okay,
Michael,
What's your question?
What's your question?
And the will turns into a yearning.
So it's almost like on a very subtle level,
You know,
When I'm to be I'm yearning more than I'm willing.
And it's so it's like will,
But it's from a deeper level.
And it's a bit different.
Um,
No,
The yearning.
Okay,
So the yearning is deeper.
And then your,
The action from the yearning,
From that level,
The action of saying the mantra,
You see,
Like,
It's not.
It's not a different level.
It's,
It's the same.
If you're feeling a different level,
It will be you'll be feeling a difference in understanding between your masculine feminine side,
Your own internal.
Yeah,
It's getting too confusing.
Okay.
You know,
The more you yearn,
The more you will use your will in support of that yearning.
You understand?
Yeah.
Right.
And that's where the the inner marriage is the inner unity.
Yeah.
And it's really good.
If you're feeling the yearning stronger.
That's really good,
Michael.
Do you need more?
Do you need to speak more have more,
More information or elaborate at all?
No,
You know,
I have to ruminate on that a bit.
But But I,
You know,
I understand fully.
It's,
It's,
It's a mixture of the male and female.
And but yeah,
I don't know if it's different levels or what it is exactly.
The way you were speaking,
It was at different levels.
Yeah.
Okay.
But you can unite.
Yeah,
You can,
The more you yearn,
The more you'll find the energy to say your mantra.
Yeah,
Yeah.
It's like yin and yang together.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah,
It's been a lot of information today.
It's been a little more complicated than usual.
Yeah.
Thank you,
Michael.
Last call for any questions or Hi,
Primasutha.
Yeah,
Stephanie.
Thanks,
Everyone for your sharing.
I just wanted to go back to the start of what you were talking about,
About when there's falls and the bungee jump,
And I kind of,
It's more of a comment of how I felt it go down in my stomach kind of didn't feel good.
And I felt all this fear come up about these potential falls that could happen or all the bad things.
Yeah.
But then there's kind of something shifted,
Or there was a reframing of like,
When I think back to when I actually physically fell,
There was the beauty in it.
So sometimes the falls are actually it's the beauty,
And perhaps our daily lives are the prison and the hell that we're living in.
So it's kind of more of a shift of,
Like,
Reframing or rethinking about what's good and bad,
And that it's all good.
It's all good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah,
You know,
The more steel goes into the fire,
The stronger it gets.
So that's finally you keep going into the fire of these spiritual falls,
Whatever,
You finally get to the finally get so that you realize that you are your soul in human form,
And that you're basically invincible.
That's what happens.
You know,
I,
I'm learning to for like how to teach you guys,
Because I give you a lots of information that could maybe overstimulate your head.
But the,
But the point is,
You know,
It's like,
When you overwhelm the head,
It's then the heart has to find the way out.
Do you see?
So that's kind of what I'm hoping is like a bit overwhelmed,
Just like what Stephanie was saying,
Oh,
What if I fall?
What if I fall?
Oh,
Well,
You know,
Your heart will solve it.
Or even this thing about manipulation of energy and shifts,
If you figure it out,
Like,
You get overwhelmed,
And then you just do your heart solves it.
That's what happens over and over again.
Yeah,
It's also safe,
You guys.
I know,
We're at this,
We're at this time,
You know,
Where the outside world is getting so changing so much.
So it's harder now on the journey,
In a way,
Like,
In some ways,
There's a glut of teachers,
And yet to actually integrate this in is harder,
Because it's we're more destabilized.
But the creator and you can do it.
It's like the creator will just do it.
Yeah.
And every,
You know,
I like I pray for every after every set saying for the,
For the love and everything,
The information,
Whatever is to clear to get clear and clear in a way that it's most digestible.
Yeah,
I love the strawberry.
I'm digesting the strawberry.
Yeah,
Good.
That's it.
Strawberry.
And we're all bumbling,
Like,
You know,
Goose,
You know,
I consider myself kind of a bumbling glue goof,
Who's got a lot of light in her heart now.
That's kind of it.
We're all just doing our best here on this plane.
Yeah.
But another thing you could pray for is simplicity,
To pray for your understanding to come simpler and deeper,
Deeper.
So off the merry go round,
So that goes simpler and deeper.
Because if you steer that way,
That's what will happen.
Okay,
You guys,
It's 10 o'clock.
I am so blessed that you turn up week after week.
It is just such a joy.
You have no idea.
Thank you so much.
Thank you for coming.
Sunday's my best day.
Yeah.
And my prayers come to you all the time.
Please understand that.
You know that I'm not a person who just talks like you know that I'm like truth teller,
It comes to you all the time.
And your faces pass in front of my mind.
And sometimes I get the feeling you need a little bit of a prayer.
So I'll give you a prayer.
It's like,
You know,
She's a great example.
She shows us how loving we can be.
And we can do this too.
And all I've this one's done is just wanting to do this too.
Like her example.
You know,
Flawed,
Tidy,
But she just we're gods,
You guys,
We're the creator.
We can do this.
You can allow this.
Yeah,
The creator does it.
You go home every night.
Every night,
Every day,
You're further along.
I'm sure I'm sure this is why people can complete with earth plane,
But they sort of stay asleep all time.
It may take them 5 million lifetimes,
But they actually get moved along by just going home to the creator every night.
You see.
So if you're a little more focused than that,
Like this group,
Our souls are celebrating.
Okay,
Bless your heart.
Bless you.
