Evolve And Be Happy

This satsang highlighted the importance of understanding how to evolve. Premasudha outlined the ups and downs experienced by Michael, a satsang member, which built the foundation for his spiritual and career breakthrough.

Just as dawn follows night time, dark times are always followed by a return of the light. Sometimes we have to be patient but as Premasudha says over and over, just never give up.

Premasudha also hilariously described her own experiences with her spiritual teachers, reminding us that we are all human.

The strongest feeling from this satsang was the power of unconditional love and how loved and supported by the Universe we all are, even if we don't know it. As we evolve, we discover it is true - Love does win because it is all there really is, underneath this multitude of forms.

Michael, Susan, Sri Lakshmi, and Ruth Anne share their experiences.

Speaker Credits: Michael Schanz, Susan Simmons, Sri Lakshmi, and Ruth Anne MacEachern

Transcript

Beloveds,

We're praying for grace,

For evoking Amma's grace.

Amma,

Please drown us in your grace.

May we feel it.

May we feel the warm love that we feel when we're close to you personally or when we find the creator in our hearts.

May we feel this more and more and may we recognize that there is light and there's dark and we have breakthroughs and then there's integration and so we might have to walk through a bit of darkness but can you give us the peace and the strength to just walk in faith until we find the light again.

This is Premasuddha's prayer for all of you.

Please keep trusting the light will come always.

If you lose it,

It will return.

I promise you this.

Strengthen our faith,

Amma,

Please.

And so it is.

Okay,

So Michael,

I want to just talk about your life in a way lately,

If I can.

And after it,

If you've got any words that you want to add,

Please do.

But I just want to talk about how the journey works.

So some months ago,

Michael got,

You know,

Laid off from his university job.

And we spoke about it and he said,

Well,

I think that I'll be brought back.

But there are no guarantees.

And Michael's the sole wage earner.

And it went on for months.

And indeed,

The layoff was rescinded,

And he was brought back.

And then recently,

Michael contacted me,

He was going through a rough patch.

And some physical symptoms were really bothering him.

And he made a shift during the time we made the phone call.

He went down into the deep sorrow of separation.

And he brought Amma's energy into his body.

He brought his soul into his body.

Well,

The next thing I hear,

You know,

Michael's got the feeling that he wanted to,

You know,

Maybe make a contribution at the ashram while he was there.

And maybe there was room to do like,

Maybe some work on,

You know,

Business and spirituality.

Because Michael's a business professor.

And lo and behold,

Amma's University invited Michael to speak on this topic to 100 students.

They just grabbed it when he went forward.

He went,

Yes.

So here he is,

Speaking,

You know,

At Amma's University on business,

And the unity of business and spirituality.

Okay,

Do you guys see the steps that went into this?

And I'm just doing this as an onlooker.

So Michael personally would know much more fully about what has gone into the outcome where he's been asked by basically Amma to speak to the university students.

This is what the journey's like.

Please,

So many of you like,

And it's so human.

It's not just you.

I was the same way.

You know,

We go through these periods like Michael did with the,

You know,

Being laid off.

So that's,

You know,

Base chakra thing,

Survival.

And,

You know,

It's hard on the ego.

Yeah.

But he trusted his guidance and he,

You know,

The university re-invited him.

Sorry.

Now,

Look at what's happened.

So he went through turmoil,

But he was open.

He went through it innocently.

Innocently,

Just going through it,

Opening to learn.

And look what happened.

Like,

What an amazing thing to happen,

To be able to,

You know,

Speak to a hundred students at God's university,

Basically,

And maybe things will develop from there.

Because we have to have courage.

It's like sometimes it looks dark,

But it's,

The universe almost is trying to help us clear our complexes so she can give us these great gifts.

Yeah,

Please.

And we're all human.

So we're all going to go,

Oh,

Why me?

You know,

Blah,

Blah,

Blah.

But we can keep that to a minimum.

You know,

It's like,

Yeah,

You can have a day of self-pity and then,

You know,

Come on,

Start your mantra again.

You know,

Yeah.

But this is what the journey's like.

That's why it's called climbing a mountain.

You know,

Sometimes we slip and fall.

We have to pick ourselves up.

But there's always good news coming.

I mean,

Lots of times,

The things that happened to us,

In my experience,

You couldn't have even dreamed them up.

Like,

You know,

All the good things that happened to me,

It's like way more than anything I could have thought up myself.

And I think that's,

Like,

Pretty impressive to be speaking to,

You know,

The university.

But,

But,

You know,

The thing is,

Michael's job,

His journey will be continuing,

And there'll be ups and downs and blah,

Blah,

Blah,

You know.

But I just wanted to tell you,

Like,

Spotlight how it works,

Because some of you get so scared with very tiny steps,

I have to say.

Okay?

Like,

Some of you,

You know,

You lose your faith and get discouraged with,

You know,

Very little,

Very small challenges.

You know,

Pramasutu is the same way.

I remember Abraham,

And I've probably told you this,

But Abraham,

You know,

He saw that I could be a powerful light,

I think.

So,

He was always on my back,

That guy.

Like,

And one thing,

We had to do chores around the,

You know,

The ashram,

Well,

It was,

You know,

With Lanai,

A Hawaiian island,

We were living on the land,

And I took the job of picking up glass.

So,

I wasn't assigned it,

I just,

It was sort of,

I chose it.

And every time Abraham saw me,

He ridiculed me for these,

Like,

Doing these tiny movements,

Because I was picking up glass when he saw a lot more love power,

You know.

I was looking for itty-bitty things.

Like,

We had this,

One of the things we had to do was we had to chop logs,

And you had to hit a log,

You had to,

You know,

Hit a stump,

And you had to split it.

Everybody had to do this,

You guys.

It didn't matter,

Like,

Even if you had trouble lifting this axe,

You had to do that.

And you know what,

When you did it,

You felt really,

Like,

Good and powerful.

It's like,

Wow.

And my job,

Like,

My self-chosen job of picking up glass,

It was,

Abraham kept on,

Like,

This is too small.

You're playing in too small a paddock.

Right,

And that was my habitual to try to stay safe.

I kept myself small to stay safe,

But you know,

It didn't keep me safe.

I cracked up.

It was so not safe to do that.

I feel like I've lost you a bit,

But I kind of shouldn't have.

I kind of feel like I should have lost you.

You guys should be able to follow what I'm saying.

I'm just going back to Michael.

Michael,

Did you have anything to add to that or correct?

Is there something,

Anything that's amiss with what I said or,

You know?

You know,

I just wanted to say that I had written these guys,

I don't know,

A few months ago,

And nobody ever answered.

And it just,

You know,

Being at the ashram,

I mean,

I didn't expect anything.

And just one thing led to another,

And it happened pretty quickly.

But it's really just amazing.

And it's like I told you,

You know,

You were the motor for it.

I asked Amma,

You know,

Twice to,

You know,

To open up the box in my heart.

I think that happened pretty quickly.

Things seem to happen really quickly here.

And yeah,

Just one thing led to another.

So yeah,

Well,

You know,

We'll just see.

We'll see.

I mean,

I'm looking forward to it.

And the funny thing is,

It's exactly the philosophy of business that I've always had,

But I could never find it anywhere else.

Right.

Okay,

That's it.

You guys,

That's it.

That's what happens when you free your soul.

It's something you always wanted.

It's something you always thought and felt.

And you do enough work that you manifest basically an avenue in the outside world to share it.

That is exactly it.

And that is proof of the pudding.

And to do that,

You have to come out of your head.

And Michael has come out of his head a lot.

I used to tell him that he was surrounded by an energetic box,

Like a coffin.

And as time's gone on,

As we've been working together,

He's been able to take deeper breaths.

And this whole energetic box has loosened because he allowed this.

Okay.

Pilata,

I mean,

You could have God standing right next to you.

And if you don't allow the clearing,

Nothing's going to happen.

Because we're respected.

Our choices are respected.

God will never force.

The Creator will never force.

Amma will never force.

That's so cool.

That's just great.

You know,

It's just,

But do you see the sequence,

Michael,

Too,

I'm talking about,

Like the challenges that came to get you here?

Yeah,

Most definitely.

It was just a step-by-step thing.

And I could feel it because,

Well,

I've just not been working for the last,

You know,

Five or six weeks,

Because my off term.

But even beneath,

You know,

Over the last few months,

When I was doing a lot,

I had a lot of work to do.

Even beneath that,

I could feel things were going on.

So.

Right.

Yeah,

You told me that.

Yeah.

And that,

You know,

Certainly desire was there,

And I just trust you a thousand percent.

That's very dear.

Well.

Yeah,

You know,

And even this,

You know,

Michael and Saskia had the experience of a teacher that they experienced as being,

You know,

Corrupt.

And it was a difficult experience.

And they went through that.

On the way to Amma.

You know,

It's like,

You just embrace everything.

You go through everything.

Yeah.

It's sort of like,

You know,

Don't get scared halfway through,

You know.

If you're going to go on the journey,

Then just go,

You know.

If you've got a competent teacher,

Just go.

Yeah.

But,

You know,

At the same time,

I'm going to say to you guys,

You guys,

Don't push yourselves,

Okay?

Don't force it.

You know,

This is where it's like,

What does she mean?

What is she?

She's saying the opposite now.

Because we can't force it.

But it's sort of like Abraham ridiculing me for picking up these little glass pieces.

Like,

At the time,

It was like,

I felt insulted.

And I was irritated.

And it was sort of like,

Here's another man ridiculing me,

You know.

That was my conditioned response.

But afterwards,

I saw what he was meaning.

And you see,

The great thing about working with a self-realized teacher is that even if you don't understand what's going on,

If they see something like that,

And they're addressing it,

Like he did with me,

That would have furthered my progress,

He would have been working with my soul.

Even though on the surface,

I found it obnoxious,

But the power of with a self-realized person,

It's like the soul has got room to maneuver,

It's got room to work with you in very deep ways that are right beyond your understanding.

It's sort of like,

If a self-realized person just has the thought of you,

It's a healing,

It's a blessing.

Yeah,

Please understand this.

That's why,

That's the whole point of reaching self-realization.

It's like,

That's why it's so celebrated in the East,

Because it just,

The presence on earth helps everybody.

And contact with them helps.

And Amma's like a million.

Oh,

We are so blessed.

But this stuff is real,

You guys,

It's like hard to validate on the journey,

Because you,

You know,

Half the time,

Really,

To be just really blunt,

We're so blinkered by the ego that we don't see.

We don't see the grace and the gift of what's happening for us.

But it's happening,

Even if we don't see it,

And it is dislodging our ego goggles.

Yeah.

I see so much that Abraham did for me that I had no idea during,

Let alone Amma,

Where it's like squared and cubed.

Yeah.

You know,

Abraham used to talk about mass subtlety.

What he said,

What he meant by that was that with the awakened teacher,

That they have achieved mastery over all the minutiae of their mind,

Like they've solved all the conflicts of the mind,

You know,

The ego dissolves,

And a lot of the mind dissolves.

This is where it gets hard to understand,

Because there has to be enough mind left to create the universe.

The universe is like a reflection of the creator,

And it's created by your minds,

You guys.

So even if you teach self-realization,

As long as you're alive,

You still have,

You're still working in the mind situation,

Because the whole world is created by your mind,

Which is backed by your soul,

Your soul's,

It's really created by your soul,

But it's,

I don't know,

Outlined by your mind.

I don't know how to say it.

I don't even know how to know why I'm going on about this.

I've lost you.

It's so much sweeter and more loving than you can imagine until you really wake up,

And when you really wake up,

You see this,

And you go,

Oh my goodness.

Yeah,

And you find a way to share your gifts.

You don't even have to be fully self-realized to do that.

It's just like Michael,

This opportunity has manifested.

He's allowed it to manifest.

It's the,

It's proof of the pudding.

This is how it works.

Some of you have really pushed back to me.

I'm,

You know,

I'm shining a light on Michael because it's just such a clear picture of the journey,

And I'm also celebrating him in that I've seen his progress.

He's an older male.

He'd been working very hard,

You know,

A lot of work hours,

And still he's,

You know,

Managed to evolve.

Yeah,

It's,

Yeah,

It's kind of like,

Yeah,

And at the same time,

You guys,

It's,

Yeah,

It's his dharma.

It's like it's done by something beyond Michael,

And he's just finding out what his soul chose.

It was all so pre-ordained that it would go this way,

You see.

This is what's so ridiculous,

And just keep believing in yourselves,

You guys.

Okay,

Good.

I can,

Okay,

Here I've got you guys.

I can,

I've got this deep embrace of you guys right now.

You're letting,

You're letting the love coming through premasuda to embrace you.

Yeah,

Right.

That's right.

We all have lots of ups and downs in our lives.

You know,

Premasuda's life only got good when she was 60.

You should have known me earlier.

It's just a joke.

I used to wander around going,

What is the meaning of all this?

Why is it so hard?

Really?

And all these people,

You know,

I've been told,

No,

Really,

It's true.

It's the same.

It was the same for me,

You guys.

Please,

Please,

Please get this.

I remember,

You know,

I told you,

I had a lot of psychics in the early days saying,

You know,

That I was like,

Be a famous healer,

And I used to go like,

Well,

Where is it?

For decades,

You guys.

Yeah,

So please,

And think of my mom who just made this huge leap on her deathbed.

Doesn't matter when we do it.

What's important is you love and honor yourselves,

You guys,

And that you're your own best friend.

No matter what.

Because that is you honoring the creator in you.

Yeah.

I've got something else,

You know,

I want to talk about.

And I've talked about it before.

The,

You know,

Witnessing and integration.

But I want to really emphasize again,

You guys,

Just be your natural selves.

Okay?

The spirituality isn't a job.

You know,

It's not like you have to like,

You know,

Get all dressed up to go somewhere.

Like sometimes in the journey,

It's like some of you guys feel that you have to like,

Get all dressed up to do your journey.

You kind of,

I don't know what you do.

It's sort of like you go,

You think it's something you do,

And it gets really mixed up.

It gets really mixed up in the ego.

Yeah,

And you do bad and good with yourselves a lot,

Like judging.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah,

Like some of you guys,

You know,

You,

It's much better.

You're getting much,

Much better.

And some of you have come right out of this.

But some of you are still kind of doing the journey with your heads.

You know,

Yeah.

You know,

It's actually a good idea.

You know how obnoxious entitled people can be.

But on the journey,

It's kind of like,

If you could just feel entitled to be here.

Like,

You feel entitled to be here on the earth,

And to be yourselves.

Like,

Kind of imagine that you're like an aristocrat,

And you never have to say a lord and lady of the manor,

And you never have to really,

Your presence is just accepted and valued just for being here.

Like a lord and lady of the manor.

It's like,

They just,

They don't have to fight for their place.

And their existence is enough.

This is what I'm trying to say to you.

Your existence is enough.

It's,

It's,

The journey works when we're just natural.

When we're just our natural selves.

And when you,

You know,

If you can just be your natural self,

And witness yourself from there.

It's like,

Sometimes little kids will say,

It's like,

Before their ego gets really strong,

They'll say something like,

Johnny had a banana sandwich for lunch.

Like,

Meaning that,

Instead of saying,

I,

You know,

The child saying,

I had a banana sandwich.

But it's,

Before the ego is really strong,

They might say something like,

Johnny had a banana sandwich,

Or a peanut butter and banana sandwich.

Like,

That's a witness.

That's an innocent example of just the witnessing.

Johnny witnessed himself having a peanut butter and banana sandwich.

And because his ego isn't formed yet,

This witnessing is stronger than his I.

I had a banana sandwich.

He didn't say that.

Okay,

So when we're coming out of our ego,

We might have cleared a little bit for a witness.

So,

It's like,

We might have a really tiny bit of ourselves that can just witness ourself clearly,

Like a child.

But the rest of us might,

We might have still an ego in us,

Involvement.

So,

Say,

You know,

Say you go to a party,

And you,

Or I don't know what situation.

Supposing you snap at somebody,

And you hurt their feelings.

So,

Somebody who's totally unconscious,

Just snaps at somebody.

If you're able to witness,

You might be present,

Even just a little bit,

To notice that your emotions are strong again,

And you're feeling threatened.

And you watch these words come out of your mouth,

Even as part of you is feeling really threatened,

Really feels this person deserves to be shouted at.

It's,

You guys,

It's to be your natural self,

To allow it.

You're entitled to be here.

You,

It doesn't matter how many mistakes you make,

You are still infinitely valuable.

Nothing can take that away.

You know,

And when you get that,

You'll be able to witness yourself,

You see.

When you,

When you find that peace within yourself,

Where that there's part of you that knows that you're really valuable,

There's part of you that has access to this stillness inside.

Premasuddha finds it very difficult to explain witnessing.

Now,

I don't know if that's universal,

Or whether actually Premasuddha doesn't understand witnessing,

Which is why she can't explain it.

Like,

You know,

I really,

I sort of wonder why it's so hard to explain it.

All I know is that when I surfaced from,

You know,

Having lost my noodle,

The old Janet was dead.

She was dead.

And in that place,

I had enough peace and neutrality that I could witness myself and watch myself.

It's sort of like riding a horse.

Yeah,

Sort of like riding a horse.

So you're,

You're with the horse,

You know,

Like,

Say this,

You know,

The horse is getting jumpy,

Maybe.

You can feel the horse is jumping.

And so you alter the way that you're riding the horse,

You kind of get a stronger grip on the reins,

And sort of,

It's sort of like,

I would,

You know,

Witness myself.

And when I started getting upset or something,

I immediately moved in to witness.

Just like riding a horse,

And you,

You go for more control with riding the horse,

The same thing,

I kind of would go,

Okay,

Here it's starting,

Here it's starting,

And I would lodge and witness part of me,

Even as I was going through it.

See,

I wasn't thinking,

Oh,

You're bad for doing this.

Which is what you guys do a lot.

You do the bad and good.

Like,

I wasn't doing that.

I really want you to get the witnessing.

And some of you,

You're making two small steps and getting fussed over very small things.

Just like me picking up the glass is a task that kept my mind focused in a very small way.

So,

You see,

There's a bigness that's required before you can really witness.

The bigness of making room for the fact that you're a divine being.

It's this,

You guys,

Making room for the fact that you're a divine being.

And Abraham couldn't,

Couldn't get through to me that way.

So he ridiculed me for picking up these little pieces of glass because I would not receive it any other way.

I wouldn't let him communicate it to me.

So he ridiculed me.

He sort of banged up against my ego.

The fact that I was blocking his ego,

Blocking his love for me meant that he would move into acting that way with me.

Yeah.

Right.

I can feel this wall in some of you.

It's exactly that.

It's kind of a wall that stops you from really getting how precious you are,

How loved you are,

How valuable you are,

Even if you hear me say the words.

And,

You know,

You guys,

We're all on track.

We couldn't try any harder.

We couldn't do any better.

We are each one of us exactly where our souls want us to be.

Yeah.

Exactly where it was preordained for us to be.

But it just breaks my heart a little bit.

That's what you're hearing from me.

It breaks my heart.

I think like I broke Abraham's heart a little.

Right.

Sometimes it's easier when we get older,

Even though the patterns are stronger,

Like,

You know,

Because we've made the same,

You know,

It's like the path gets deeper ruts,

And after 60 years or so,

The ruts can feel pretty big.

But older people know they're going to die.

So they don't mess around.

Often,

They don't mess around.

And some of you younger ones have pressure of career and everything,

Which is all just illusory,

You know.

There's,

Who is it?

He's a movie star.

I think it was Jim Carrey.

And his dad had a very comedic talents,

Too.

But he turned away from his work,

From that,

And became like a chartered accountant or something,

Sold insurance or something.

Anyway,

When he was like 40 or something,

He got fired.

And the family was really impoverished.

And he found it hard to get back on his feet,

Probably because he turned against his heart in the first place.

So,

You know,

If you have 15 years of going against your heart,

And then life knocks you down,

Maybe you don't have a lot of trust about life.

Maybe your despair is pretty high.

But the fact is,

It was his dad turned against his dharma.

So Jim Carrey went,

Well,

You know,

Turning down the flame or running away from truth isn't safe.

Look what happened to my dad.

It's safer to just move into truth.

And this is what Prama Sutta says.

It's like,

It's safer to move into truth,

You guys,

By a long shot.

Yeah.

You know,

To the extent that you're hard on yourselves,

The time will come where you celebrate yourselves.

It'll either be this life or another life,

But you will do the opposite to what you're doing.

If you're one of the ones,

The time will come where you'll stop doing it.

Yeah,

And you'll celebrate yourself.

I wrote a poem.

I'm going to start maybe sending these poems to you guys.

Wrote a poem about,

I'm talking to somebody who's,

You know,

Hard on themselves.

And I'm saying,

Don't do it.

It's karmic to be hard on the creator yourself,

And you'll get the gift of many more lifetimes.

And then in the poem,

I'm saying,

I'm speaking from being gifted with these more lifetimes.

I'm in one of these extra lifetimes because I didn't get it about honoring the creator.

Right.

And in fact,

Prama Sutta is in one of those extra lifetimes,

Really.

And I'm speaking to you now because the time has come for Prama Sutta to awake.

This is a lifetime for really awakening after turning against myself many lifetimes.

So join me in the light,

You guys.

And,

You know,

Do it with warmth and self-forgiveness.

Don't let your ego grab this,

Please.

Don't do it.

Don't let your ego grab you and say,

Oh,

That you're being too hard on yourself.

You're bad,

Bad,

Bad.

Don't.

You know,

Sakharu talks about that he had three lifetimes of serving some teacher,

And the teacher wouldn't touch him.

And just would touch him with like some feather or something.

And that he was really kind of downgraded,

Not respected and everything.

And he had three lifetimes like that.

Finally,

You guys,

We get sick of it.

Whatever we're doing in lifetime,

You know,

If we're doing something like that,

We finally come to the end.

We just can't do it anymore.

Yeah.

It's so simple.

The journey is so simple and so obvious.

But you have to have a big mind to see it.

You know,

Amma talks about that the biggest,

One of the biggest needs is to open the doors and windows of our mind.

Because if we can't see in a big way,

We can't even see how the journey works.

Right.

Okay,

This got you.

A penny drop there.

Yeah,

You know what,

It's crippling.

If you can't see how the journey works,

It's crippling.

Because you're just like,

You know,

Feeling your way along.

You know,

I read a,

There's a sage,

And I can't remember his name,

But he wrote this beautiful talk.

And he said,

If you don't get the concept of integration,

I mean,

Either people get the concept of integration,

That life will keep doing,

The pendulum will keep going from light into dark,

As long as you're alive on the planet.

And the self-realized person has just come to stillness about it.

So they're not impacted,

They don't care.

But it's still going light to dark.

And this sage said,

If you don't get it,

You will experience destruction.

And the reason he said this,

From the Sioux Fields,

Is because if you don't realize that the light will always come after the darkness,

You get stuck in the darkness.

And you stay there.

Do you get it,

You guys?

It's like being stuck in,

You know,

Night time and thinking,

Oh,

Light's never going to come.

Like,

You know,

In the old days,

You know,

The early humankind was always surprised when dawn broke.

They never knew it was going to happen.

You know,

They kept praying and respectful to the sun.

And,

You know,

It's good.

That's a good attitude to be that respectful.

But it's also a bit comic.

Yeah.

The light will always come.

Unless you,

Like,

You know,

Refuse it.

This is my,

This is,

You know,

With this sage saying,

You know,

That if you don't get the integration thing,

You get stuck in destruction.

And you guys,

Okay,

Maybe this will help.

With the downgrading of the feminine consciousness,

We have lost the understanding of the rhythms of the rhythms of the seasons of the pendulum going light and dark.

Right?

The feminine will always go for unconditional life.

The feminine will hold on to life,

Like,

You know,

Serve service of life,

Value life,

Do everything she can to facilitate life,

Because she gives birth.

We have to be like that.

We have to take care of the children.

And like I said to you before,

You know,

The Vikings would come and we'd suddenly have new husbands.

And we'd have to,

You know,

Find some reason to get up in the morning.

And,

You know,

Help protect our kids.

Light will always come.

Unless you have such a love affair with darkness that you're not allowing it.

And if that's happening,

Just watch it.

Even with a tiny mustard size piece of yourself,

Standing outside the situation,

Watching how stuck you are in darkness.

Premasutra,

With all the ups and downs,

I never was sure that life that light was going to come again.

But I always just pretended it would.

It was sort of like,

Fake it till you make it.

If I couldn't really,

You know,

Believe it,

At least I would hold on to that.

Theoretically,

I know light's going to come.

It's not always going to be like this.

And,

You know,

When you leave this,

When the satsang finishes,

May you feel lighter and empowered,

Please.

Please.

Remember,

It's like Amma's grace is doing the work for you.

Just turning up.

Just turning up to be in the soup.

To be in the soup pot with all of us.

The soup pot of grace.

So that we get a bit of flavor,

A bit of the perfume of the soup,

A perfume of the grace.

And that it sticks to us and lasts a week.

But,

You know,

You don't have to think negatively.

Sometimes I would,

You know,

I'd be going along thinking a certain way and I'd go like,

I don't have to think this way.

I just don't have to think this way.

Like,

I could think another way.

You know,

This came later in the journey.

Some,

You know,

Some of this stuff becomes easier with,

As you get higher up the mountain.

Sometimes,

You know,

Earlier you just have to,

You know,

Put up with the weather of the day.

It's like cloudy weather.

You're feeling a bit blue.

I'm seeing,

You know,

I feel funny about saying this because these levels I can't really speak for Amma,

But I'll tell you what's coming up in my mind is I'm seeing a picture of,

I'm seeing Amma singing to us,

Singing to us all.

Yeah.

Right.

Right.

You know how children respond to a mom singing?

It's like that.

And that's the power of soul that's behind these sad sayings.

Behind any sad thing where,

You know,

Where two or more people are gathered together,

There is love.

That's all I'm talking about.

Right.

The soup of love.

I also want to tell you stuff like,

You know,

I was at the,

Okay,

This is for,

You know,

What Primasiddha's ego was like.

So,

I'm at the ashram.

I guess this is about 10 years ago.

I write this book on anger,

And a little booklet about anger.

And somebody reads it,

And they come up to me,

And they're kind of like almost cross with me saying,

Well,

Primasiddha,

You just kind of summed up the whole spiritual journey in that book.

Just like that.

She said it just like that.

And I went,

Oh,

That's odd.

And I was,

I felt a couple of conflicting things.

I felt like,

I felt like she was right,

That Primasiddha had,

Because it was like about anger and how to get past anger.

It was just a very simple story about anger and what it is and getting over it.

And,

You know,

The way my ego was built is that kind of thing happened to me a lot.

Where I would get in trouble for the most innocent thing,

Or scorned or ridiculed over and over and over.

Because that's what I was carrying from other lifetimes.

Yeah.

And I remember thinking how bizarre it was,

Because I was thinking,

You know,

Don't people get celebrated for stuff like this?

How come I just get,

Like,

Chewed out,

Really?

But this is what,

Primasiddha,

This is one of these extra lives that I came into clear,

Where I've had a lot of lives where I wasn't very nice to myself.

That stuff like this happened.

So my approach was,

Like,

You know,

I didn't like this comment particularly,

But it was like,

I was just like,

Well,

I just want to get out of here.

This is my bottom line.

It's kind of like,

I just want to get out of here.

So I'll just,

Like,

I'll just keep going.

And Amma gave me enough,

You know,

Pats on the back,

Support,

Everything,

That I always felt,

Like,

Close to her.

Like,

You know,

And if something happened that disrupted my relationship with Amma,

I was on it,

100%,

Working on it night and day,

Till it was cleared.

That was my safety.

See,

Whatever you're facing,

You just,

You know,

It's just your,

It's your gig.

And the thing is,

You guys,

That it can be cleared.

I mean,

It gets cleared.

It does get cleared.

The soul wins.

Love wins.

And remember,

You're not that bad.

There are a couple of you that look very discouraged with yourselves.

And I'm like,

You're not that bad.

Come on.

You're pretty good.

Maxie,

You're pretty good.

Maxie,

You're pretty good.

Yeah.

You look discouraged with yourself.

You're good.

Yeah.

It's good.

Yeah.

Another thing Abraham did,

You know,

When I,

He would come up to me sometimes and he'd say,

You're a really good mother.

And I'm like,

It was like,

It didn't help.

It didn't help.

First of all,

I didn't really believe him.

I felt like he was just saying that,

Kind of,

To,

I don't know.

I didn't really believe him.

Yeah.

This is what we're like.

This is what you guys are like with me.

So really,

What I'm telling you,

Just like the simple truth about how great you are.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Have we got any questions or comments,

You know,

You guys?

Or a joke?

Has somebody got a joke they want to tell?

Okay.

She likes me.

So,

Sweet one.

Here I am.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

I just wanted to follow up about my leg,

My right leg.

And the last time we were talking to each other,

You had said masculine.

And so then I just wanted to follow up and let you know that I found it.

I sank in heavy.

And what I saw was my father.

And I could not remove the image of him looking at me.

I couldn't remove that image out of my head and could not resolve the pain,

The physical pain,

Which was felt like I was breaking my own leg.

Right.

Right.

And I sat there with that image of my dad.

And I just said,

It's okay.

You are forgiven.

I'm forgiven.

I forgive you.

With every grace that has been bestowed upon me,

It's just going to fall out naturally like dominoes.

And now you're clear.

And be happy.

I want you to be happy.

I want you to enjoy all these wonderful things that have come into your life and believe how much I love you.

And then the image of him turned golden.

And I saw a red heart.

And now I'm okay.

And I know that he's okay.

Okay.

So what's,

How's your leg pain?

It's gone.

What's gone?

It's gone.

What leg pain?

Good.

Good.

That's the proof of the pudding.

I couldn't look at it.

I couldn't feel it.

I was just making it worse.

And that was being stuck in the black.

But then I was listening to MC Yogi.

And he does this song.

It's okay.

Hold on.

The light will come.

The light will come.

Hold on.

Hold on.

The light only takes one spark to light up the dark.

And all of us will light up like a string of beautiful love lights.

And there have been chills of waves of cold purification.

And it's been lovely.

And I have more strength now.

And I understand that I am not in this life doing anybody a service by being small.

And it's time to stay big,

Not just in anger,

But in love and compassion.

And I just that's I could keep going.

But I'm going to stop there.

Thank you.

Yeah.

But just yeah,

Just do it slowly.

And just,

You know,

Be your natural self.

I mean,

You guys,

If pain goes,

That's proof.

That's your empirical evidence.

Yeah,

So good work.

Sri Lanka.

Good work.

Sri Lanka.

With names.

Relax me.

Good work,

Sweet one.

Good.

And just relax about it all.

It's like our soul does lift it over time.

Yeah.

But I'm,

I'm very happy that the pain's gone.

Yay.

Yay.

It's very simple.

You guys,

We just kind of bumble into it.

Anybody else?

What's one thing that made a lot of sense?

Can somebody answer this for themselves?

What from this satsang really hit home?

Hi,

Parmasara.

It's Ruthanne.

Oh,

Ruthanne,

Sweet one.

Yeah.

Hi.

So the one thing that struck me was when you spoke about the feminine.

And I'm not going to be able to explain this very well,

But I saw the pendulum going and,

And accept sort of accepting it,

But actually being with it.

And yeah,

It felt like,

Yeah,

It felt like to me,

I was like,

I had a feeling of being in a cradle and being rocked back and forth really gently.

And I feeling safe.

Yeah.

And that's,

That struck me very much when you said that.

Okay,

Good.

That's how shit happens.

We suddenly feel safer in life,

Just that way.

Just these really subtle things.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And our comprehension goes up.

Yeah,

It just popped out.

So when you asked that question,

I went,

Wow,

That was something that really struck me.

Yeah,

That's great.

You come forward like this.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Good work,

Sweetie.

Beautiful on so many levels.

Yeah.

Yeah,

Good.

Thank you.

Yeah,

You guys,

We start feeling safer.

That's what happens.

Start feeling safe.

You start feeling loved.

You start like understanding more,

It just becomes doable.

You just,

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's great.

I've got a very light feeling.

Like,

Yeah.

Just a feeling of incredible light peace.

Yeah.

You know,

Even in the old days,

Premasuddha would work so hard trying to get through to people,

You know,

And that I had more of the doer consciousness,

You know,

Premasuddha is a doer,

You know,

Save people,

Right?

Yeah.

Premasuddha had to save herself.

Anyway,

I notice as I proceed,

It's lighter and more effortless.

And I just know you guys are loved and you're going to get it.

You will get it.

More and more.

Yeah.

You're in the love soup.

The awareness that's saying love soup,

That continues even when we're not together.

And we're in Amma's arms.

So,

You know.

Yeah.

It's very good.

Yeah.

The love,

I feel like it's getting warmer and stronger in these sad things.

Warmer and stronger and more trusting.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Fantastic.

Does anybody want to say anything?

Hi,

Premasuddha.

It's Susan.

Susan,

Sweet one.

I'm looking for you.

Yeah.

I just wanted to tell you this.

I thought it was so funny.

I had dinner with my family.

So,

It's like my brother and his family and my sister and my mom,

Or whatever.

And we went to this restaurant.

And it's this Mexican place.

And it was a place my father really loved.

We would always do family stuff.

Anyhow,

It was a lot of fun.

I had totally turned a corner with my family.

But what I wanted to tell you,

And I don't know if it was the margarita,

But you were with me.

You were on my left side.

And you were just having a really good time with me.

And I was,

It was wonderful.

It was so much fun.

And I was like,

Well,

You know,

Maybe you were bored last night when you're dreaming and you joined us.

But I love this place because it was started in this woman's house,

Really small,

Tiny.

And the people that work there have been there like 30,

40 years,

Like that kind of place,

You know,

Like hole in the wall.

And it's just,

You know,

And um,

But like,

You know,

I've had such a,

I swear to God,

Like a year ago,

And it's on one of the like insight timer clips,

Like you talking to me,

Because I was upset with my family.

And it was like,

Be around people who love you,

Blah,

Blah.

And like,

I just had a good time.

I just let it go.

Didn't try and control anybody.

I didn't,

I didn't need anything from anybody.

I just tried to offer love to whoever.

And I just feel so different.

And,

And it was great having you there.

Well,

You know,

You know,

I will be,

I will be with you.

I will be working with you guys all the time.

Totally.

That's the way it works.

And also,

You're also feeling the presence of your own soul through premise Judah.

Okay.

Yeah,

It's Yeah.

Right.

It's got like premise to this face,

But it's also your own soul too.

Right?

We are not alone.

You guys were so loved.

Right.

That's lovely.

Susan,

That's lovely.

Oh,

She likes me.

Yeah.

Yeah,

No.

Good.

Good.

Yeah.

And I'm feeling it also.

I'm feeling it also.

With the people I'm working with.

So I have all this new,

Like business people coming through.

And like right before the site saying I'd asked this client,

Send me some pictures of things you like,

You know,

Like I do interiors or whatever.

And,

And like,

She's like,

I don't really like furniture,

But I like the vibe.

And I was just like,

Peace,

Serenity,

Love.

Like,

I love.

I love that I can talk to my clients about love and trying to bring joy in their home.

With,

You know,

Creating a space for that.

That's what I'm doing.

Fantastic.

It's wonderful.

It's just so and I love like,

I love like,

I love my clients.

This last one I just met,

I don't I think she'll be a client,

But I just wanted to hug her.

Because she's in such trauma,

Her house had mold.

It's like a draft.

And I was just like,

Oh,

Let me carry it for you.

I can do this.

Just let it go.

Let me do it.

You know,

I just because she's in such distress.

And I love it.

It's like that.

And everything like with like with Michael.

I love it.

I see it.

I see it too.

Like the integration.

Right.

Right.

And the more that you're embodying your true energy,

The more this will be communicated to people's interiors,

Right?

And to their to how you are with them psychologically is fantastic.

Susan.

It's fantastic.

It's like,

It's just,

It's just I mean,

It's like the world's gonna do but we're doing it now.

We're not waiting 100 years or however long it's going to take everybody.

We're doing it now.

Yeah,

Yeah,

We're moving to embodying love.

This is it.

Fantastic.

Yeah.

And you're all doing it.

Yeah,

That's me.

That's so sweet of these hearts and things that are coming.

That's so sweet.

Anyhow,

Thank you.

Wow.

Oh,

Thank you.

Yeah.

Well,

I'm feeling you guys letting the love get to you even more now.

It's almost coming in behind your heads.

And,

And sort of,

It's in your body.

But it's like deep in your body.

I feel like coming.

Yeah.

Oh,

So cool.

Oh,

It's just this is a,

You know,

My wildest dreams coming true.

This is so what I wish to happen.

And we've just started.

I've been feeling this.

This work is just getting started.

And you're all with me.

We're all with Amma.

Pramasut is going to the ashram on Tuesday.

So I'll be speaking to you from there next week.

Yeah.

Okay,

You guys last call.

I'm just feeling such warmth for you all just such incredible unconditional love and warmth and respect.

Respect for just being here at this time.

Right,

Like badge of honor.

Right.

Oh,

My beloved,

I just adore you.

Many,

Many blessings.

And,

You know,

May your week just be much lighter than you think possible.

And if there's darkness at all,

May you know that light's coming.

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah,

Sort of stop and take a breath and just let the light come.

That's it.

Okay.

Bye,

Beloveds.