August 13, 2023 Satsang Part 1

Premasudha is a deeply compassionate shaman, healer, author, who has spent three decades traveling round the world, studying with healing masters, including over 18 years with Amma, the famous Indian Hugging Saint.

With her signature humor and ability to put words to vague perceptions and feelings, together with her healing touch, Premasudha's work is life changing. She has a truly great knack of assisting people out of the emotional prison of their ego/intellect into true freedom. This means that sometimes even serious diseases disappear too, as part of the emotional shift into a new more love-based understanding.

Transcript

Hello,

Everyone.

Much,

Much love.

Many,

Many blessings.

Lovely to see you all.

Thank you for coming.

Thank you for coming.

Yeah.

And may all of our hearts open.

And may our minds expand.

So we've got room for the whole world in our hearts.

I've been,

You know,

I'm at the ashram.

And one of the many miracles that is happening around Amma is she's bringing up these little children.

So they these children are four,

Five,

Six.

And they,

You know,

Today I watched a four year old who even could have been a three year old,

Like it was hard to gauge.

But he stood in front of the whole congregate,

Like the whole group,

Which is,

You know,

Files,

A couple of thousand people,

And gave a lesson on the Ramayana,

Which is the book of,

You know,

The tales from ancient India.

Like,

It's unbelievable.

He gave this mini satsang.

And before he,

He did this,

Another five year old did.

And the other thing is,

Like,

These kids play the,

The drums.

In the evening,

Sometimes they'll play the drums for hours and hours and hours.

It's just unbelievable.

And they're,

They're talking from a much higher level of intelligence than you would expect in just a normal kid.

And really,

I feel this is showing us our,

Our capabilities when we tap into our God self.

I mean,

These little kids are mini geniuses.

Truly.

I mean,

It's just off the charts.

I'm sitting here watching it going,

Am I on planet Earth?

You know?

So this is,

You know,

And around Amma,

All of this just gets woven into the ordinary.

It's just,

Yeah,

Meh,

You know,

Ordinary.

But it's this ongoing,

Ongoing miracle.

And it shows the great capacity of human beings.

And the great capacity of all of you.

And even though it's easier when our capacities have been activated,

When we're like that,

It's like these kids are,

They're just growing with holding a full deck.

And most of us weren't loved as deeply as Amma loves these kids.

So we might not be holding a full deck of all of our capacities,

But it can,

You can get it in adulthood.

It can be activated.

And that is the point of this work.

And this is the point of the satsangs,

That there's a very deep,

Energetic activation that's going on in you to become more.

And really,

This is how I've grown into this work,

Because as I,

You know,

I was a very limited journalist,

With a very linear mind,

And very limited capacities.

Right?

And you can have what you see in me,

Whatever you see in me,

Is,

Is in you,

Or else you wouldn't be able to see it.

You see,

So honor yourselves and bring it into being Okay.

Okay.

And,

And I'm feeling that all of you are capable of that and willing,

Like,

It's like you're,

You know,

Teachers say the same thing over and over again.

And you've heard me say,

Honor yourselves,

Honor yourselves a million times.

And so it sinks in.

I mean,

You know,

There's like a million of me,

But,

But you get my point.

And the other thing that dawned on me,

This is just is that,

You know,

A spiritual student fights a lot of battles,

A lot of spiritual battles.

And then,

Over time,

As a result of winning,

Of their divine self winning these battles against the ego,

The person becomes more and more present to see.

So as they win the battles,

You become more and more present.

And if you think of it,

Like,

Now is one spelled backwards.

So n o w,

If you reverse it,

It's w o n one.

And it's like English is full of that.

It's like where the truth is just woven in.

When you when your heart wins the battle,

You're in the now.

Okay.

And as you're winning,

You will move more into the now,

Except for in when your issues come up.

And then you'll feel like less present,

But it's just temporary.

And after you've fought that battle,

You'll be more again in the now.

So I have,

You know,

A keystone of this work is to use everything that happens.

Well,

First of all,

That everything that happens is to evolve you is exactly what you need for your evolution.

And the the so the key is how you handle it,

How you handle what happens to you.

And the other thing that's key to this work is we are forever tripping over our humanity.

Okay,

And I really,

I really hope that you really learn to accept this that we're divine beings in human form.

And it's by embracing our humanity,

That we will find our God self,

Not separate from our humanity,

Or by manipulating our humanity,

Or trying to fix our humanity.

It's by an unconditional embrace of our humanity.

It's really you get that.

Because if you don't get it,

Your love for yourself will always have withholds.

And if your love for yourself has withholds,

It will stop you from making spiritual progress,

I promise you.

It's like when we're standing there naked in front of God,

Just with our human body,

In total vulnerability and the vulnerability of our humanity.

And we go to God,

That's it.

And then the self realization is when you feel you go right through your humanity to your God self.

And you realize that your human body has karma,

And a certain set existence is going to happen.

And but you're beyond that.

You're something beyond that.

Right.

And we get unhappy when we think that we're just human.

But you see,

We don't get beyond our humanity until we accept our humanity.

And this is the biggest struggle that I see in everyone.

And it was mine,

Too.

So I have a little bit of a story.

And I'm going to give you a little bit of a peek into some messiness within my own existence.

And I'm going to use it as an example for how to handle,

Handle messiness.

Okay.

So recently,

I was speaking with a woman who,

You know,

Was coming for counsel.

And I missed her.

Yeah,

I,

You know,

I missed her.

And this,

You know,

This has not happened in years.

There are a number of reasons why I missed her.

And because I missed her.

For her,

It was like,

You know,

A core wounding being heard again.

Yeah.

So it was.

Yeah.

And I realized what had happened.

But there was nothing I could really do except for to give,

Ask for Amma's grace.

Now,

What I did with that with a couple things,

One is,

There's a level that it was inevitable in the sense of,

I,

I have just made a really huge spirit,

Or not this particularly,

But something like that.

Because I just made a huge spiritual,

Like,

Huge,

I just made it.

Okay.

So one of the things that happens with spiritual steps,

Steps,

When you make big,

Big shifts,

It will seem like darkness attacks it.

Okay,

It's like King Herod went after all the firstborn boy babies.

When he heard about the birth of Jesus was coming.

Right?

It is always,

I mean,

Even an economist would talk about like,

You know,

A startup,

A startup that successfully deals with its early challenges becomes sturdily viable.

It's like these challenges come,

Like it feels like so unfair and so awful that new shifts get a challenge.

But the point of it is to promote strength to create strength.

Okay.

So a startup that faces early challenges would then have the resilience to keep going.

And in my case,

Again,

It was like,

I made this big spiritual step,

This disaster happened,

Like a level of disaster experienced it as a disaster.

And so it's like,

It will be helping me integrate in this new spiritual territory.

And for the young for the person also involved,

There would be something similar going on with her.

There always is.

So it's like,

What we do with it,

Like in a situation,

If you're if you're core wounding,

It feels like,

Oh,

No,

It's happened again.

We have the choice to go up or to go down.

Basically,

You know,

I've said this before,

That Einstein said,

Problems are not solved at the same level they're created,

We either go up or down with things,

We either go into a renaissance or dark age.

And that is a choice.

So whatever happens,

It's what we do with it,

The counts.

It's not it's like I say,

You know,

That,

That having those two nervous breakdowns in my 30s.

It's like,

They,

They were the ground on which came this ability to work with people psychologically so well,

You see what I mean?

But I could have been a marginal woman my whole life,

You know,

In and out of mental institutions.

So you guys,

This isn't,

This is really present in all of our lives.

And sometimes we deny big events,

We,

We,

We kind of make them small,

So that we don't,

We just kind of deny them,

Rationalize them.

And we don't see that the fertile soil to,

To,

To really go up.

Okay.

So in this case,

You know,

I'll tell you what I did,

I had three horrible,

Horrible,

Horrible days.

Now,

I haven't had horrible days like this for years.

And I prayed for me for the young woman,

Who,

You know,

My first be or the worst scenario would be if,

If,

You know,

She felt really wounded.

So I was working with her energetically to support her soul and support her moving into higher vibration.

Okay,

Just three days steady,

And praying for myself,

I took it to Amma.

I went and stood outside where Amma sleeps,

Because in the ashram,

We can,

We can go there.

And I,

I would go back there and back there and back there,

Until I came to some peace about it.

And I also felt the young woman was okay,

Energetically,

I knew Amma knew about it.

And I knew that it would be end up being used in the highest good way.

So it's like that.

It's like,

That is,

That's actually living with innocence.

And they talk,

Yeah,

Living with innocence,

Taking what comes when it comes,

And facing it head on.

And I saw the other thing I did was I,

I,

I observed things about myself,

I observed an overhang from my mother,

That I thought was all cleared.

Okay.

I also observed a spiritual ego.

And I also observed a level of a fear of vulnerability in me.

All of those things that I hadn't known about before this encounter.

And the encounter allowed me to clear that.

And it will never happen again.

It's just never going to happen again that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So this is what the journey is like,

I just want to say is kind of messy.

It's a little bit going by the seat of your pants.

But if you face life from the heart in this way,

So that you really live this transparently,

And this deeply and this honestly,

You become fertile ground for your soul to come into your body.

Because after an incident like this,

And that work,

There's more room for my soul and my body to see my ego moved out of my body to another degree to another level.

And then peace come in.

And I will no doubt give this woman,

This younger woman,

Ongoing energetic support.

Yeah.

Because we're all really precious.

Right?

Sure,

I could say,

Well,

I was making a really big spiritual step.

But on the other hand,

There's another soul involved.

So you know,

So care has to be taken.

Mm hmm.

Yeah.

Anyway,

It was one of the saddest things that's happened to me in a long time.

But I trust Amma will,

Will be okay.

You know,

This choice to either go up or go down.

It's,

It's,

It's really present in our world right now.

About what we do.

I mean,

It's a little bit you know,

The movie Barbie and Oppenheimer open opening on the same day.

And I haven't watched Barbie,

But I saw a clip where it's like they're all doing their superficial thing.

And then somebody says,

Oh,

But we're gonna die one day.

And then everybody goes into you know,

Oh,

And then they shift and kind of party on again.

And it's,

It's a bit like where we are with our,

Our lives.

And,

And the that,

That is not sustainable.

But we keep going.

We keep doing it.

Like,

There's still this mad choice to chasing after things and everything.

And it's like,

There's not much having a lot of things,

You know,

For all going extinct.

It's like,

It's just getting stupider and stupider.

I saw a picture of the coast of Guatemala,

And I hope it was fake news.

Because it was as far as you could see,

Plastic bottles to the horizon,

Plastic,

And this isn't the plastic island in the middle of the Pacific they talk about.

This is just off Guatemala.

This is a picture I saw on LinkedIn.

So this,

This reminds me of like the Barbie going,

You know,

Partying,

Then Oh,

We're gonna die,

And then going back to party,

You know.

But the reason I'm,

I'm seeing this is that the cure for,

Or it's like,

The cure for this world really is if we all get down to our hearts,

And really feel the sorrow of what we're doing to ourselves and to the world.

And if we,

And if we were there,

For even if we went down and had two difficult days,

Went down there,

I'll tell you,

The air would get purified.

See,

It's like Amma says,

Meditation purifies the climate.

You know,

If we all became more of the heart,

Mother Nature would settle down.

Okay,

And this might not make any sense,

Or might seem like,

Well,

Maybe,

But I know it like two plus two equals four,

It would be inevitable.

Because she's responding to us being haywire.

So if we come back to ourselves,

She'll settle.

Yeah.

So if we just decide to live a little more deeply,

A little more honestly,

A little more thoughtfully,

Right?

There's really nothing to lose.

There's everything to lose if we don't.

You know,

A lot of people that I work with are scared to go very deep in themselves.

And,

You know,

It shouldn't be done too quickly.

But the goal of spirituality isn't to have a happy life.

It's to go deeper,

And have more meaning,

Feel more meaning.

There's a stuckness I can feel in everybody.

And I'm putting words to it.

You know how I do this,

Putting words to it.

And so it can dissipate because it's operating in your unconscious.

Okay,

It's better.

That's it.

That's it.

Good.

And there's this,

I know,

It's a stuckness around not being willing to feel.

And,

You know,

Indeed,

We're,

We're trained to go in our heads.

So it's,

It's not a fault.

And,

And it would have been when you were little,

That you turn down your feeling.

No,

It's like little kids feel so intensely.

And it's like parents are kind of alienated,

More alienated.

So kids turn down their feeling to match their parents.

Okay,

Let that echo in your ears.

All of you turn down your capacity to feel to stay sane when you're little.

And when it comes back,

We can feel a little crazy.

You know,

Just temporarily.

There's kind of a surface,

All of you've got a surface willingness to feel more deeply.

But there's a little bit of a deeper hesitation under that.

There's,

There's a couple feeling like I don't,

It's kind of like,

I don't want to feel how angry I am underneath.

But you know,

Yeah,

I can feel one person particularly,

You know,

You can,

You can learn how to feel anger and witness it.

You could ask that it comes up very slowly.

All of you could ask that this deeper capacity for feeling begin at a pace that you can handle.

Yeah.

Yeah,

You're willing to do that.

That's it.

You will you see the knowledge that I speak to from it's because I've turned up my feeling that I get this information from you guys.

Yeah.

So there's a lot of information that comes when you do this,

That just actually makes you safer.

Because you're getting more data.

It's beautiful.

It's beautiful.

You're pulling my heartstrings.

You're so wanting to do this.

Yeah,

That's it.

And this is how how the world changes.

Small groups,

Right?

You know,

Just deciding,

I'll tell you a big secret,

Just deciding to,

To feel more than you're feeling.

Becoming less numb at a pace you can handle just that that intention will set it in motion.

And then when it starts happening,

And maybe you feel more tearful,

Or you suddenly feel angry,

Don't,

Don't repress it,

You know,

Just let it let yourself cook a bit.

Right?

Right.

I can feel all of you want to become more.

It's beautiful.

That's it.

It's beautiful.

That's it.

That's very beautiful.

What you've done,

I can feel this shift in you.

Good.

Good.

Yeah.

Good.

Okay.

Yeah.

And it's very real this.

And any work we do is at the level of soul.

So permanent at this level,

There may be other levels,

But this is permanent.

And it's an act of courage to feel in this world.

But we'll lose it if we don't.

So,

You know,

When I watch Amma with people,

The person,

You know,

She's hugging,

And she'll be responding to them like every nuance.

You can see her,

I can see her energetically responding.

And I know when I go for hugs,

She responds to every single flicker of any thought or inner change she responds to.

I can feel this is the God willing to feel more.

This is,

This is a big,

This is a big shift.

This is like,

Like,

Remember,

I was telling you,

I made this big spiritual shift.

It's like,

I can feel all of you.

It's like you're all you're all cooking with this about the feeling more.

You're all ready to feel more.

I'm going to heaven.

This is fantastic.

So just you know,

If you have a couple of sad days,

Just feel the sadness.

Or if you're cranky tomorrow,

Just be with the crankiness.

Don't berate yourself.

It's a clearing.

It's a clearing.

Okay.

You know,

I'm,

I'm just going to do a little plug here for the feminine energy.

So I noticed so many people in Ashram,

The women are there,

They think they're so timid.

Do you know,

There was one woman,

She's got a heart of gold.

She's got great green eyes.

And,

You know,

The sign of a kelp,

Which means that she'll have lots of the kelps have their faith.

They're they they're psychic.

They're,

You know,

And she mentioned she'd been with Amma for 35 years.

I said something like,

About feeling,

You know,

About feeling the flowers.

Anyway,

She said,

Oh,

She doesn't feel she can't feel.

She can't feel the flowers.

I mean,

She can just she sees the flowers.

She can't feel the flowers.

And I'm like,

You've been with Amma 35 years.

So what's the matter with you?

So I'm,

I,

I said something to her,

That validated her,

That deeply validated her,

Her humanity,

And her essence.

And she was very moved by it.

And really,

What I was giving her was a doorway to feet to allowing her feeling.

And it was it was that she didn't have enough self esteem to value the feminine polarity of humanity,

Of which she is.

That was the key.

Okay,

So I'm seeing this a lot.

And I'm seeing,

I mean,

I know Osho said,

Women,

It's women can't be spiritual masters,

Because the feminine mind is so timid.

Yeah,

I know.

I'm like,

What the hell,

Man.

But he said the feminine mind is too timid.

And it's like,

I get what you're saying.

Because we've been there to be female.

So I'm going to talk about,

You know,

Giving birth.

And this will be in guys too.

Although,

You know,

Guys can sometimes come forward with their feminine energy in just such a delightful way.

And when a man does that,

He gets a really full deck.

And he allows his feminine it even enhances his masculinity.

I remember Abraham,

He could be tender,

As anything with a woman in distress,

And he could be tough as nails.

And I remember seeing the whole spectrum of his freedom to be in that spectrum,

Where most of the men that I knew,

You know,

Were kind of right in the middle with both ends,

They couldn't be tender,

But they also couldn't be very strong.

They were kind of just bad.

But I'm going to come up with a woman who's in birth and bonding with a child,

The experience of silence that the spiritual teachers are talking about,

Are,

Are it's the thing it's most similar to is the bonding to the baby,

Especially in the first three months,

Months,

Where the mother is just so plugged into the baby,

The baby could be on the other side of the world.

And if the baby was in distress,

The mother would know.

It's just like this.

You know,

The baby makes one peep to cry and the mother's breasts fill up with milk.

You know,

When I make a shift into compassion,

I get that let down in thing happening in my chest,

My breasts,

If I'm getting,

You know,

The milk's coming into my breasts to to nurse.

And that happens with every shift into compassion.

And I only have one breast,

So it's ridiculous.

It's like,

But it feels like two.

Yeah.

And it's just it's what I'm going to say,

It's,

It's in,

It's in you,

In the women,

We have this,

We give birth,

We connect to life.

The silence that Amma talks about when you have a child,

That is what it feels like.

So any woman who's had a child can use that as a reference point for silence,

For what silence would feel like that can come to your child.

It's like Amma's connection to us.

You see,

So we can get so heady about the spiritual journey,

But any woman who's had a baby is already experienced a lot of what that silence feels like.

Okay,

That was one of my points and hopes women will just begin to love their feminine nature more,

The men would be happier too,

Because we'd be we'd be more loving.

Yeah.

Does anybody have any questions or comments?

Then please feel free and be brave.

Nobody.

It's okay.

It's okay.

You don't have to.

It's okay.

It's like nobody makes comments,

Or anything.

It's like people are just struck down by the truth,

You know?

It's like,

I'm kidding you.

Okay.

If there are no questions,

I'm going to talk a little bit about,

Again,

About the journey.

So,

You know,

One might decide that one wants to live more in truth.

And maybe you don't really know how to do that.

Maybe it's even hard to pray sincerely.

Because it's sort of we're so separated from ourselves,

It's hard to get any feeling sometimes even for God,

You know,

Turns into our Father who art in heaven,

Hallowed be thy name,

Monotony,

Or something that we do mechanically.

Okay,

I'm going to give it over.

That's very different from a heartfelt,

Oh,

Please help me God solve,

Solve this.

So when you what,

Then your psyche,

What will start to happen?

If you're,

You know,

Really wanting to connect up to God,

Your body will start hurting your,

You will,

Your complexes will start coming up to be cleared.

And so they'll turn into,

You know,

Like a headache.

If there's emotional conflict about it.

There might be a pressure on the back of the neck,

You know,

If the issue is oppression,

You,

You know,

Somebody was too hard on you growing up the foot on the neck,

That's coming up to be cleared.

Or you could feel a lot of tension.

That would be fear coming up.

So it's just part of the very human process of complexes,

Clearing.

But you know,

If you notice it,

And,

And value the process,

And make the connection between the pains in your body and what the issues are,

To pain,

Lots of time people have pain in the shoulders when their,

Their,

Their ego tells them they have to take too much responsibility instead of giving it over.

There's a real logic to it.

And then when the pains become less,

The issues,

Healing,

And when the pains over the issue at that level has healed.

It's,

It's,

It's a really simple kind of way to be able to monitor your progress to witness your progress,

And to know what you're in,

You know.

So if your heart's clenched,

You know,

You've got a closed heart,

That will be in your thoughts,

Too.

So you can just be really gentle with yourself,

You know,

Do things that inspire you,

That remind you of the value of being here and of being human.