Finding Gratitude In Grief

This powerful meditation invites you to find gratitude in grief, to feel this fully in your body and emotional fields, and to connect with those you have lost with this spirit of gratitude. This meditation contains sound healing and was recorded live.
The short song excerpt I sing in the meditation is from "I Have Loved You" by Michael Joncas.

Transcript

Begin with your deep oxytocin breaths,

Really sigh them out tonight.

Let yourself discharge any emotion that you're able to before we start this practice tonight.

Let yourself become connected to the ground.

Let that gratitude begin to flow into you as you breathe.

Allow the top of your head,

That crown chakra to open and invite gratitude,

The vibration of gratitude in through the top of your head tonight.

Let it flow into your face and your scalp and your jaw and your throat.

Let it flow into your neck and your shoulders.

Let that gratitude come into your arms,

Your upper arms and elbows,

Your forearms,

Wrists and hands.

Let yourself flow gratitude from your hands.

You can bring them together,

You can bring them to your heart or your belly if you'd like and let that gratitude flow out.

Let it come into your chest and your upper back.

Let it come into your heart space.

Invite that energy of gratitude to flow into your heart space.

Take a few breaths here.

Let that gratitude continue to flow down your torso into your belly and your mid and low back.

Let it come in to your hips and your pelvis.

Allow this high vibrational energy of gratitude to flow into your thighs and your knees.

Breathe it into your knees here and let it flow down into your lower legs and your ankles and your feet.

Let yourself receive this gratitude now.

Let yourself connect to this energy of love.

Let yourself remain in your body for this meditation.

Let this gratitude continue to flow and know that if you are floundering,

If you are struggling,

The rest of us are holding this vibration for you.

Reach out and take it.

We offer it with love and let yourself receive it.

Draw your attention to the grief in your body.

Find it in your body.

It may be a heaviness,

An ache in the chest.

It may be a knot in the belly.

It may feel like it's mostly in your mind.

Wherever it is,

Let yourself find it and let yourself draw that gratitude,

That energy directly into this feeling of grief.

As you breathe in,

Draw that gratitude to your grief and sigh it out.

Let it release down into the earth.

Let it be recycled for the highest good.

And know that we are not letting go of the grief completely here.

If you're not ready for that tonight,

You don't need to do that.

That's okay.

Bringing gratitude to this grief honors the grief.

It honors the loved one that you lost.

This does not diminish anything about your grief or your feelings for this person.

In fact,

This is how we honor the love that we had for this person.

This grief comes out of love.

So let this vibration of love,

This gratitude come into your grief and then let it ripple out.

Begin to think about what gratitude you can find in this grief.

Was it the time that you did get to spend with your loved one?

Was it the way they looked at you?

Was it the way they held you?

Was it just your experience of getting to know them,

Of getting to have them in your space?

Was it the experience of knowing that when they let go of their physical body,

They were out of struggle,

They were out of pain?

Maybe it's that recognition that the difficulty you had in your relationship was an opportunity for both of you to grow.

Wherever you can find that morsel of gratitude,

Bring it into your grief now.

And it's probably a combination of many of those things.

It may be something I didn't mention and you may not have words for this and that's okay.

This is an energetic practice.

So let this energy of gratitude come into your grief.

Let yourself feel this gratitude that lives even in the darkest,

Heaviest grief that we carry.

Come now to your sanctuary.

Bring it here into this room.

Stay in your body.

Draw your planet to you.

Draw your sanctuary,

Your space to you and head directly to your waterfall of joy.

If you've never practiced this before,

That's okay.

Just picture yourself in the most beautiful place you can imagine.

This is your safe space.

No one is allowed here without your invitation.

You control everything about this space.

And within this energetic sanctuary,

There is a beautiful waterfall.

Let yourself be drawn there.

Find this waterfall of joy.

And for tonight,

Let this joy be gratitude because gratitude and joy are infinitely connected.

Gratitude leads us to love.

It leads us to joy.

It leads us to bliss.

So let this waterfall be of gratitude tonight and just look at it for a moment.

Feel the energy of this gratitude as it crashes down.

So much power in this gratitude here.

And as you're ready,

If you're ready,

Invite your loved one or loved ones into this space with you.

Invite them to stand next to this waterfall of gratitude.

Invite them to be with you in this space,

In this space of gratitude.

No grief to be had in this moment,

In this space,

All gratitude.

You can feel the mist of this waterfall of gratitude coming up and lightly touching your skin.

You can feel this gratitude coming fully into all parts of your body,

Not just the grief now.

This part of your body filled with gratitude for the experience of having this person,

This animal,

This loved one,

This being,

This baby in your space for however long they were here.

Let yourself be joyful in this if you can be.

And if you can't,

That's okay.

But if you have access to it,

Hug your loved one with joy,

Hold them.

And if you're ready,

As you're ready,

Step into the water with your loved one,

With your loved ones.

You've got a whole posse full of people and animals and plants,

Whatever it is,

Bring them all into your waterfall of joy,

Of gratitude.

Let this energy of gratitude flow over you.

Let yourself remember the most joyous moment you had with this being and know that they are still here with you and know that they know how you felt about them.

And let yourself let go of any regrets that you are carrying that we're adding to the heaviness of that grief,

Knowing that your loved one,

Your loved ones are here in gratitude with you.

Your loved ones accept the honor.

They receive this gratitude from you and you receive gratitude from them.

In this moment,

All is gratitude.

Thankful for the moments you had together,

Thankful for the fact that they are free,

Thankful for the fact that they are still here when you need them,

Even though you can't see them,

Even though you can't touch them.

Thankful for the legacy that they left you.

Thankful for the part of them that lives on in you.

I have loved you with an everlasting love.

I have called you and you are my.

I have loved you with an everlasting love.

I have called you and you are my.

Call what is yours.

Call them to you now.

Hold them now.

Let them hold you.

Let yourself feel this gratitude.

Let yourself feel joy if it's accessible to you.

Let it flow through you from the top of your head down through your neck and your shoulders and your torso and your belly,

Your hips and your legs and your feet.

Let this waterfall come from above and flow through your body and down back into the earth,

Into this reservoir of beautiful love and joy and bliss and gratitude.

Just for a few moments here,

If you can let go of that heaviness,

Let go of that loss and know that you are not alone,

That your loved ones are still with you,

That they've just moved on to serve in a different plane,

Just as they may have served you here in this lifetime.

Let yourself speak of your gratitude out loud now.

Say thank you to your loved ones for whatever it is that you were able to find,

Whatever morsel of gratitude you found tonight.

Say thank you.

Say thank you to yourself for being brave enough to be in this energy,

For being brave enough to live through your grief,

For having the faith to know,

To feel that your loved one is not gone,

That you are still supported and held by that being.

As you're ready,

Stay for just a minute longer.

Maybe coming to the edge of the water here,

You're not in the waterfall,

You may think of this as a baptism in gratitude for you,

For your loved ones,

For the bond that you still have with them that's always accessible to you.

Maybe you're sitting on the bank now,

Just your feet,

Toes dangling in the water,

Still together,

Still holding each other.

And as you're ready,

Step out of the water,

Standing next to this beautiful waterfall of gratitude,

Letting that energy stay with you.

Let yourself spend one last moment with your loved one or loved ones here.

Look into their eyes and say thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

As you're ready,

Let yourself come slowly back into your sanctuary away from that waterfall.

Bringing that energy of gratitude with you as much as you can,

Would like to.

Let's just sit quietly for a moment in our safe space and let that energy move through us.

Your loved one is slowly moving away now,

Moving to where they need to be.

Thank them for joining us this evening.

They were here.

Absolutely,

They were here.

Give them one last hug.

Thank them one last time and know that you can revisit this.

You can revisit them and that even if you don't feel them this close to you,

They are still with you.

And the parts of them,

The energy that you took from them,

That they offered to you,

That you received is never lost.

It's always part of you.

Slowly remind yourself that you're still in your body.

Let that energetic sanctuary,

That planet float back to its home.

Reacquaint yourself with your body here for a moment.

If you'd like,

You can allow that crown chakra to gently close or leave it open for your highest good.

And now let's draw in that gratitude one last time.

Open yourself to that divine love,

That unconditional love.

That is the source of our gratitude.

That is the source of all and let it flow now into the top of your head.

Let it flow now into your brain and your skull and your face and your jaw.

Let it flow into your neck and your shoulders.

Let it flow into your chest and upper back and your mid back,

Your belly and your low back.

Let this unconditional light,

This gratitude,

This love into your hips and pelvis.

Draw it down into each thigh and into your knees,

Legs and into your ankles and feet.

Let your whole body be made of this light and love,

This gratitude.

Last time,

Say thank you.

Thank you for molding me into the person I am today.

Thank you for holding space for me.

Thank you for shining your beautiful light into this world.

Thank you.

As you're ready,

You can begin to slowly move your fingers,

Toes,

Wrists,

Ankles,

Your shoulders up and down.

Take your time here.

Take some deep breaths.

And before you come all the way out of this,

Check back in with your grief and notice if it's shifted.

Notice if that tiny morsel of gratitude has grown.

And if not,

That's okay.

Thank yourself for doing this anyway.

And come back to this when you're ready.

As you're ready,

You can open your eyes.