Hello lovely,
Pasha Lindy here.
How are you?
So this session is all about self-care and reflecting on which aspects of our wellbeing are already supported and which need a bit more support.
And hopefully out of this we'll improve our weekly self-care routine.
So there are many aspects to wellbeing including physical,
Mental,
Emotional,
Relational and spiritual needs.
And when we start to tune into these needs and notice them,
This gives us an opportunity to take action.
So we're invited today to do a journaling exercise that will help us recognise what we're already doing for our wellbeing and perhaps identify some areas where we'd like to do a bit more.
Often we're actually doing many self-compassionate things already we just didn't notice.
And recent research studies show that resilient people are the ones who know how to deeply nourish and take care of themselves when they're no longer under duress.
It's like they know how to rest and recover and this helps them replenish for the next round.
You know,
Just like after a period of working really hard it can feel really,
Really good for the body,
The mind and the soul to take a holiday.
Yeah,
Resilient people know how to give themselves mini holidays lots of the time,
Maybe even every day.
And I'm imagining that you already actually do lots and lots of things for your self-care already.
Do you wake up in the morning and brush your teeth?
Do you choose which clothes you're going to wear for the day with some care?
Do you feed yourself in the morning?
Drink water,
Perhaps coffee or tea?
Silly as it may sound,
All of these things are acts of self-care,
Right?
And at some stage in our lives,
We had to ask somebody else to do those things for us when we were babies and children.
It's just that we don't take time to appreciate these very,
Very small things.
Now,
Why do that?
Well,
Research is suggesting that it's not just about doing the good things.
It's not just about having the positive experiences.
It's about deliberately and consciously noticing them,
Feeling them and absorbing those feelings.
It's a bit like if you're given a gift,
Let's say on your birthday,
And you have this feeling of like,
Yeah,
There's something a bit empty about it.
There's something that's been missed.
Whereas if somebody gives you a gift and you really take time to appreciate that,
Wow,
Oh,
My goodness,
This.
Thank you so much.
That's so generous of you.
And you take time to explore what the gift is and be with it and really appreciate it.
Doesn't that feel good for you,
For your for your body and your heart?
Well,
It's exactly the same thing with noticing what we're already doing for our well-being.
You know,
We're already actually giving ourselves lots of self-care gifts every day.
And what I'm doing here is giving you greater permission to notice those and appreciate those as acts of self-love.
What we're deliberately doing here is we're reprogramming some of our neural networks to appreciate simple things.
Imagine if you got up and you spent the entire day appreciating the tiny acts of self-care you did for yourself.
Yeah,
I just stretched my body and that was a really kind thing to do.
I got myself a glass of water.
So refreshing.
I think I'm going to cook something really delicious and nourishing for myself.
So not just doing the kind things,
But really letting them sink in.
It's self-loving,
Right?
You can't help but feel joy and contentment.
And this becomes doubly important when times are tough.
When things are challenging,
It can be so wonderfully refreshing just to let go of the dramas of the challenges and come back to what is simply working well.
Right now,
For instance,
My body feels really grounded and supported and I feel really grateful for that.
I'm grateful that I've chosen a particular chair and table for my computer and microphone set up that allow me to have a comfortable posture.
That was kind of me.
Can this make us more selfish?
You might be asking.
Well,
Research suggests that more than 80% of us are actually way kinder to others than we are to ourselves.
So it's highly unlikely that something like this is going to make us more selfish.
It's more likely that it's just going to redress the balance.
There's also research to suggest that selfish people tend to be materialistic rather than appreciating all of the simple joys in life.
And,
You know,
When we appreciate simple things in our own lives,
We also tend to appreciate the simple acts we see others doing.
And we appreciate the kind,
Simple things they do for us and the kind,
Simple things that we do for them.
So we start to appreciate interdependency,
That we're all connected.
And this helps us build stronger,
Better relationships.
When communities go through periods of intense challenge,
This is often one of the things that comes out.
It's that people do simple and very kind things for each other that are hugely appreciated,
Like offering to do your shopping,
Offering to bring you medicine,
Asking if you're OK.
And in recent times,
Maybe we've experienced that or even been the giver of such kindness.
So even if you have some reservations about this kind of practice,
Rather than prejudging the experience,
Why don't we give it a go and actually have the experience and see what happens?
It's an experiment,
Right?
OK,
So now we'll need our journals for this next reflection exercise.
And so writing down the following headings for well-being.
Physical.
Mental.
Emotional.
Relational.
And spiritual.
And for those of us who don't really identify with the word spiritual,
This really means what brings our life value or meaning,
What gives our life purpose.
And now going through each heading and writing down the things that we already do to take care of ourselves in these areas.
For example,
With our physical well-being,
Maybe we always exercise two or three times a week.
Maybe we enjoy walking.
Maybe we take a five minute break to stretch halfway through our day.
How else do you take care of your physical needs?
And pressing pause if you'd like a bit more time.
Moving on to our mental needs.
So we can meet our mental needs in many ways.
For example,
Learning a new hobby,
Reading a book,
Learning a language,
Listening to a podcast,
Having an intelligent conversation,
Meditation.
How do you like to meet your mental needs?
And pressing pause if you'd like some more time.
Moving on to our emotional needs.
So these could be things like watching movies,
Having a good cry,
Doing something really emotionally expressive like dance or art,
Listening to music.
How else do you take care of your emotional needs?
And pressing pause if you need more time.
Moving on to relational needs.
These could be things like spending time with family,
With a pet,
Making time for friends,
Joining a group or a club.
How do you take care of your relational or social needs?
And pressing pause if you need more time.
Now moving on to our spiritual needs or the things that give our life meaning,
Value and purpose.
How do you meet those needs?
Is it quiet reflection time?
Walking in nature?
Prayer?
Meditation?
And pressing pause if you'd like more time.
Otherwise looking back over everything we've just journaled and rereading everything.
And just taking a moment to really appreciate all the things that we're already doing to take care of ourselves.
And we might also notice some areas where things are a little off balance,
Perhaps an area of our life that's a little lacking.
For example,
Maybe we've got lots in the relational and social needs,
But we don't have so much in the mental needs.
So permission to be creative for a moment and just have a look and see if anything comes to mind that you'd like to add in to your weekly self-care routine.
And pressing pause if we need a bit more time.
So hopefully this exercise helped us develop some appreciation for what we're already doing and also identify some areas where we'd like to do a bit more.
One really effective and informal way to check in with our self-care needs from moment to moment,
Which helps us notice how we're doing.
And what they need is called the self-care break.
And you'll find that on my channel.
Well,
Take care for now,
Dear friend.
Bye bye.
