Hi,
This is Orit Krug,
Board certified dance movement therapist and drama and relationship expert.
Today I would love to guide you through a quick movement meditation to help you be more compassionate and understanding instead of defensive in relationships.
To begin,
I'm going to invite you to close your eyes or lower your gaze and we'll take one big breath together.
Breathing in and breathing out.
Now think about the last thing that was said or done to you that made you feel really defensive.
A time when you wish you could have responded more compassionately or more calmly instead of attacking or shutting down or disconnecting.
And before you think about it too much,
I actually want you to visualize right now that these words or behaviors are coming towards you,
Whether it's in an object or some kind of energy force or any imaginary way that comes to you right now in this moment.
And as you see it coming towards you,
Do the first thing with your body,
The first movement in order to defend against it.
Maybe you crossed your arms up in front of your face.
Maybe you put your hand out like a stop sign.
Maybe you even instinctually felt your body jerking back.
Or maybe something else happened.
There's no right or wrong.
These are just suggestions to make this experience a little bit easier just in case it's new to you.
So do the first thing that your body instinctually wants to do to defend against these words or behaviors that are coming towards you.
And when you do this movement or when you're in this position of defending or blocking or attacking against,
I'm now going to ask you to soften it in your body,
To let it organically melt away without forcing it,
Without pushing yourself too fast and trying to just let it go and throw it away.
Intellectually,
Let it soften,
Let it melt almost like snow melting,
Trickling away into water,
Into more flow.
Try to feel that.
Try to bring more ease and lightness into your body from this place of being defensive.
You can take your time as much as you need.
And this is especially important because if we try to force an opening or a softening too quickly,
It can feel too open,
Too threatening,
Too raw and make us close right back up,
Maybe even stronger.
So just allow your body to move.
It might be as simple as a sway.
It might be something like touching the edges of your body softly.
Or if your hands are in a fist,
For example,
It might just be letting one finger loosen up at a time,
Remembering to try to soften,
Try to melt a little bit,
Try to open up in a gradual,
Safe,
Gentle way.
This experience in your body right here is what you can bring to your relationship,
The next time you feel defensive,
The next time you feel an impulse to put your guard up or push away or back away.
When you notice that happening in your body in the moment of a confrontation or a sensitive interaction,
Invite softness,
Invite more flow,
Invite more openness in this gentle,
Gradual way.
Take another deep breath in to close this practice and breathe out.
Come back to this meditation as many times as you need until you notice it integrating in your real life relationship interactions.
And if you enjoyed this but want a longer version,
Check out my Insight Timer library and find a meditation called From Criticizing to Understanding.
And until next time,
You deserve to be able to let healthy,
Lasting love in.
