Hello,
This is Orit Krug,
Board-certified somatic dance therapist and anxious attachment specialist.
This is a meditation to help you find calm and regulation through a wave of anxious attachment anxiety and fear of abandonment.
Before we get started,
I'm going to encourage you lovingly to stop trying to fix whatever you're feeling right now.
Stop trying to change it.
Stop trying to shift your feelings,
Your anxiety,
Because that's not what your body wants right now.
There are memories and wounds speaking through your body at this moment,
And we may label it as anxiety,
As fear,
As I can't calm down.
But if we look a little bit closer and we shift the narrative,
We can also see these uncomfortable sensations as our memories and wounds from the past speaking to us through our body.
So instead of trying to shut down that voice,
Let's listen and be with that part of ourselves that is aching to be heard and seen right now.
Find yourself in a comfortable position.
You can wiggle and adjust to the point where you feel like your body is supported.
Maybe that means you're lying down or you're sitting with your back against the wall.
Whatever it is,
Find a position that makes your body and your nervous system exhale just a little bit more.
You may close your eyes and let's start to take a few deep breaths together,
Breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth.
Again,
In through the nose and out through the mouth.
One last time,
In through the nose and out through the mouth.
Draw your attention to the loudest and the most pronounced sensation in your body right now.
That could be a racing heartbeat,
What feels like butterflies in your stomach,
A heavy head,
Or anything else.
The sensation that you choose is most likely the sensation that keeps coming back every time your anxious attachment flares up again.
For me,
It's my fast,
Strong heartbeat,
And I feel it every time I'm scared of being abandoned.
Focus on that sensation right now in your body,
Whatever it is for you.
Remember,
We are not trying to fix,
Change,
Or eliminate the sensation.
It may feel really uncomfortable,
But right now,
We are shining a metaphorical flashlight on this sensation.
And you may very well,
In your mind's eye,
Imagine shining a light,
A bright light,
Onto the sensation.
And as soon as you do,
Follow your first physical instinct in response.
For instance,
You may immediately,
Instinctually place your hands on your heart to feel the strong heartbeat against your hands.
You may instinctually take a huge breath in to respond to a tightness in your chest.
These are just a few examples,
And however your body leads you in the moment is right for you.
As you are meeting the sensation with movement,
With some kind of action,
I'm going to invite you to keep doing that for the next few minutes,
Without trying to change,
Fix,
Or solve whatever is happening in your body.
Instead,
I'm inviting you to truly meet your sensation wherever it's at in each moment.
So what might have started as hands on your heart,
Maybe leads to some circular motions around your heart.
And maybe that leads to bigger arm movements extending outside around your body.
It doesn't even have to develop or expand.
You can repeat the same motions over and over again.
What's most important is that it's authentic in the moment,
Not performative,
Not interesting,
Not dynamic.
Those things don't matter.
What matters is that each movement that you're doing feels like you're meeting yourself and your sensations where they're at in each given moment.
Doing your best,
Not getting it perfect,
And not worrying about right or wrong,
Because there is no such thing when you're moving with your emotions and your sensations.
I'm going to leave two minutes of space here for you to move with the sensations in your body,
To really have this opportunity to meet yourself where you're at without trying to quiet any part of you or shut down what feels uncomfortable,
And instead being right there with it.
And at the end of the two minutes,
I'll guide us gently to come to a close.
Whatever you're doing right now,
However you are moving,
Start finding an ending position,
Whatever feels natural to you.
And when you land there,
Let's take a deep breath in through the nose and out through the mouth.
You may start to physically interact with your own body,
Maybe give yourself some squeezes or some gentle,
Loving touch.
You may gently open your eyes,
Look around your space,
Notice what's around you,
Come back to the here and now.
Let's take one more deep breath together,
Breathing in.
And notice without judgment,
Without expectation,
What sensations are present now.
If you'd like to do a deeper dive into navigating anxious attachments,
Come check out my Insight Timer courses,
Where we used a somatic approach to get to the core of attachment wounds and learn how to regulate more easily through the fears and the anxiety.
Until next time,
You are worthy of the love you desire.
