Hi,
This is Ori Kruge,
Board-certified dance movement therapist and trauma and relationship expert.
Today,
I would love to guide you through a movement-based meditation to release self-blame after heartbreak.
If you are in the midst of a heartbreak,
You may be doubting if you did everything you could to save the relationship.
You may be questioning your actions or your words and wondering if you are the one to blame.
If there's a part of you that knows that your breakup was not your fault and that it could never be your fault because everything in a relationship is co-created and you really want to let go of blaming yourself and let go of these revolving thoughts about what you could have done better,
Then this meditation is for you.
To begin,
Find yourself in a position that feels supportive to your body right now.
You may sit,
Stand,
Or lay down.
Once you feel settled in this position,
Let's take two deep breaths together.
Breathing in and breathing out.
Again,
Breathing in and breathing out.
I'd like to invite you to close your eyes or lower your gaze and imagine or visualize,
Where in your body do you feel this self-blame?
Don't think about it,
But just allow the sensation to come up naturally.
Where did you first feel it?
Where do you feel this self-blame?
It could be a tightness in your chest,
A tension in your shoulders,
An overall heaviness in your body,
Or anything else.
There's no right or wrong.
Wherever you feel your sensation of self-blame,
I'd like to invite you to use your imagination to take this sensation from your body and into your hands.
Using your imagination and visualization,
You can do whatever movements feel natural to you to take the sensation from your body or this part of your body into your hands.
Now that you're holding on to the sensation of self-blame in your hands,
Notice how it feels.
Notice its attributes.
It may feel light,
Heavy.
You may see in your visualization as you're holding on to it that there's a certain color or texture.
As you're noticing the qualities of the self-blame in your hands,
I want to invite you to start to play with whatever is in your hands right now.
Move with the sensation in your hands.
An example of moving with the sensation is if you visualize the self-blame as a consistency of Play-Doh,
You may stretch it,
Knead it,
Make it into a ball,
Or something else.
If you imagined that the self-blame is like a yellow,
Golden ball of energy,
You may play with that ball of energy however you may please.
Whatever the sensation feels and looks like right now,
It may remain exactly the same,
Or you might see that it's shifting into other images,
Other colors,
Other textures.
Take your time and allow whatever wants to happen to happen without using your mind to change anything.
What does your body feel called to do?
To interact and connect with the sensation,
The sensation of self-blame.
I'm going to leave a minute of space for you to play,
Be curious,
Experience whatever wants to be experienced by following your natural body's impulses.
And at the end of the minute,
I'll guide us to come to a natural ending.
Whatever you are doing right now,
However you are moving with this self-blame,
If it still is self-blame,
Take a moment to tune in into how you want to close this experience.
Would you like to put the sensation back in your body?
Would you like to put it in an imaginary box next to you?
Would you like to make it disappear into thin air?
Maybe if your sensation of self-blame turned into something more pleasant like love and forgiveness,
You may want to put that back into your heart,
Or rub it into your body like a lotion.
Remember that we are using our imagination here,
And you can make anything happen that you want to.
And once you've reached a satisfying ending,
Gaining closure with the sensation,
Let's take a deep breath together.
Breathing in,
And breathing out.
You may be inclined to write down some notes or make some art about your experience.
If you had a very visual experience,
It can be helpful to draw that on paper.
You don't need any drawing experience,
Just go with the flow,
Go with your body as you just did in this movement.
And take note of what happened with the self-blame as you interacted with it.
Did you give it love?
Did you make it playful instead of serious?
Were you able to transmute it into something else?
And how?
It's important to notice what you needed to do in order to shift the energy of the self-blame,
Because that's something you can repeat anytime the sensation comes up again.
You may come back to this meditation as many times as you need.
And if you'd like to do a deeper dive on relationships and love and healing trauma,
Come visit my InsightTimer profile and check out my course called You Are Worthy of Love,
Healing from Trauma.
I hope to see you in there,
And until next time,
You deserve all the love that you desire.
