Preparing For The New Year - Part 3 (Recorded Live)

Begin your new year with a renewed inspiration for life. In this 3-part series, you will hear about simple and effective ways to change your habits to live your best life!! This is a recording of a live session.

Transcript

All right,

Welcome to part three of preparing for 2022.

So there were two other lessons previous to this one.

But you do not need to have listened to those or been a part of those,

Whether it was live or you're listening to a recording.

In order to listen to part three,

They do all flow together and that's totally okay.

And on another note,

Even if you're not starting the beginning of a new year,

So if this weren't a new year,

All of this information is still completely relevant,

No matter where you are in your life.

From our very first session,

We had so many folks coming in,

Who are just simply starting over new beginnings.

And this information is relevant for that at the time we're talking about the beginning of the new year,

But the information is relevant anytime of the year.

So let me know in the comments here,

What you brought,

What brought you either back to part three,

If it's your first time listening,

What brought you here.

So let me know in the comments,

What has shown up for you or what kind of called you to be here,

Even if it's something as simple as I went to go,

I went on Inside Timer and saw this live and I just showed up like that.

That is,

That is not a coincidence.

That is alignment.

And I believe that you are meant to be here and we're meant to share and co-create together.

So Antoinette says,

I love most of the prompt questions.

Awesome.

I'm not into resolutions and the idea that we have to wait for the calendar to change to the beginning.

Oh,

I love that Kathleen.

I'm so happy that that has resonated with you.

We never have to wait for a beginning of a actual calendar year to do this.

What I'm going to do real briefly is Antoinette talks about those prompt questions.

And if you are not already in the circle,

Please come join the circle.

It's called manifest your life.

I posted the questions there from day one.

We had a lot of prompt questions from the very first day.

So what I'm going to do is I will just reread them to all of you today,

But you can go into the circle,

Manifest your life.

Someone usually puts it in the comments.

So if somebody could just put the name of it in the comments so people can see it,

I'd appreciate it.

I will read through those questions from,

From part one.

Who do you want to be in 2022?

Where do you want to be?

And what do you want to be doing?

So we talked a lot.

If we recap,

I have to put my hair up.

It's really bothering me today.

If we talk a lot about creating resolutions and setting goals and on part one,

What we really shared was let's flip goal setting on our,

On its head.

And it's not about setting the goal and getting the steps to get to the goal,

But it's really focusing from the very beginning.

Thank you Venus for putting the name of the circle in the comments,

But it's about who we want to be because we have to realize that we can create a goal.

We can have a desire,

But as we take that aligned action that Katrina mentioned,

As we take that aligned action,

Our goals and our final quote unquote final destination is where we're trying to go with likely pretty much guaranteed going to change.

So if we start with the questions,

Who do you want to be?

Where do you want to be?

What do you want to be doing?

It,

It leaves so much more to be explored and it leaves you open to so much more new opportunities.

So when we come here into part three,

We really talked about those questions in part one.

In part two,

We really talked about what actions do I need to take?

And we talked about aligned action and not knowing steps A through Z,

But simply needing to know step A to B and then from B to C and not needing to know all of the things that were coming before that.

So I love that so much.

And I'm going to read this quote that I also posted in the circle because it came out of the current book that I'm reading right now.

And it says,

You will have ideas about what you would love to create.

You'll be willing to take the risk to go after it,

And you'll be strong enough to build something meaningful out of whatever happens.

So I read this out of the book and I believe it really resonated and I probably won't be able to go back and find the page.

I probably should have marked it so that I could remember.

But she was really talking about setting goals and knowing you can set goals and you can know all of these things,

But you also have to know this.

She was talking about living a life by design and creating a life by design.

And living by design does not mean that everything will happen exactly as you plan it to.

And I think that's really the message that I was trying to share in talking about aligned action is things aren't always going to go exactly as you plan them to be.

You have to be open.

You have to be flexible to what's coming.

That's why planning from A to Z isn't always going to work because your steps and everything is going to change as you experience and learn different things.

This is the name of the book.

And again,

I posted the quote and the name of the book and the author in the circle as well.

So it's 90 seconds to a life you love.

I happened to find it.

Our library was having a book sale and I happened to find it there and it was just something I picked up.

Yeah.

So that's the book.

So the three questions one last time because they are in the circle.

So you can join the circle and you can go see them there so that we can move on is who do you want to be?

Where do you want to be?

And what do you want to be doing?

So it's the who,

What,

Where.

So just think of it like that.

Who,

Where or who,

Where,

What,

Who,

Where,

What,

Who am I being?

What am I being?

And what am I doing?

So those those are kind of the things you want to think about.

So awesome.

Okay,

So let's step in to part three.

What are we going to talk about today?

We talked about taking action.

We talked about who we want to be.

What are we going to talk about today?

I laugh because I'm like,

Well,

Let's see what comes out.

Because I always like to talk from a place of source and love.

So I don't necessarily plan content as far as this is what's going to happen.

That's why conversation is so unbelievably important to me.

So what do we want to talk about today?

Today,

I really want to talk about simply moving forward,

Just moving forward,

Moving forward.

And constant change.

The only constant in our life in our life is that we will always be moving forward.

And we will always be changing.

Kathleen says that quote from the book is so all of us right now.

Yes,

It is.

And it's just that is true alignment.

The fact that I'm reading this book,

Read this section just had this conversation with all of you.

That is not a coincidence.

That is a synchronicity.

And I love it.

So so so so much.

Thank you for posting those questions,

Natty,

I appreciate it.

So as we're preparing for 2022,

We need to remember,

We're always shifting,

We're always changing,

And we are always moving forward.

I love it so much.

This is and when we understand this,

Because we like we,

As human beings,

We enjoy we want security,

Right?

We want that we talk a lot about work here,

Work life balance,

Having careers being in a job,

You don't like switching,

And our work,

And the work that we do and getting paychecks provides us with a lot of security.

But what we need to understand is that the only security that we have is that things are always changing.

And we have to work to go with the flow.

And that's one of the really biggest messages that I get when we talk about manifestation is go with the flow.

So we need to remember that we're on this journey.

The end of this journey is us no longer being here on this planet Earth.

It's us going back up to wherever we came from,

Whatever we were beforehand.

That is the end of the journey.

The end of the journey is not getting the job that we want,

Having the work life balance that we want,

Having the money that we desire,

Getting the car that we want.

The end of the journey is not those things.

Those are the journey.

So we always look towards those end goals.

It's like,

Oh,

Once I get here,

Then I'll be happy.

But we need to take a step back and say,

I'm going to get there.

And I'm going to go on this journey to get there.

And I want to make this journey as easy as possible.

Because I know that the universe has my back,

That my inner being is always looking out for me and my inner being knows the way of least resistance.

And as long as my inner being knows the way of least resistance for me to get to my desires,

That's what I'm going to do.

I'm going to listen to my inner being.

So I'm going to put that up here as far as what's my next step.

My next step is to acknowledge,

Acknowledge where you are right now.

Constantly be aware.

We're going to say acknowledge,

Acknowledgement,

Awareness.

Oh,

I have another a that would be amazing.

I don't right now.

Acknowledgement of where we are right now.

Awareness,

Constant awareness.

Constant.

Constant awareness of our alignment.

Of our alignment and our vibration.

Slash vibration.

It's awareness of our emotions and our feelings.

Constantly knowing are we in alignment?

Are we out of alignment?

Am I vibrating with my inner being or am I vibrating away from my inner being?

And where do I constantly want to go?

I want to go back to my inner being.

And then it's knowing where we are and moving forward from there.

So we're moving forward from there.

And when we're moving forward,

We're either saying yes,

I'm in alignment,

I'm going to keep going with this momentum.

Or no,

I'm out of alignment.

I need to do something to get back into alignment.

So I'm doing one of those things.

Manifest your life is the name of the circle Rosemary.

I'm not sure why it's not showing up.

But keep trying.

They're called groups now.

Oh,

Yes.

Thank you,

Susan.

They are called groups now,

Not circles.

I'll figure that out eventually.

So let's make sure we're acknowledging where we are acknowledging and accepting.

So not just acknowledging the thing,

It's okay where I am.

So we're acknowledging and we're accepting.

We're not beating ourselves up.

And then we're constantly being aware of our alignment and our vibrations through our emotion.

We're paying attention to our emotions.

And then we're moving forward saying,

I'm out of alignment,

What can I do to get back into alignment,

Our goal is constantly to be in alignment.

We want to be in alignment,

But we need to be okay also with the contrast.

So our goal is alignment with our inner being.

Every desire,

Every goal,

Everything on your vision board that you are striving for is a goal.

And the purpose of that goal is so that you can be in alignment with your inner being.

So if we go back even more general,

Who do you want to be?

I want to be aligned with my inner being.

But we also need to realize that contrast,

Things that take us out of vibration,

Bring us more clarity.

So if we look at our life and say,

I don't want any contrast,

I don't want anything bad to happen to me.

But the contrast brings us more clarity.

So if you're going into 2022,

I'd love to see you all of us,

Myself included,

Saying my goal is simply to be in alignment with my inner being.

And to accept that contrast is always bringing me more clarity.

And to understand that,

And to be a part of that.

Yeah.

Thank you guys for helping folks find the circle.

The name of the book,

The group,

The name of the book is also in the group as well.

I posted the quote and the name of the book.

So you can always go find it there as well.

But somebody else can also share that here too.

So these two things.

So I'd love to know in the comments,

How are you feeling about what I'm sharing so far?

What is coming through right now for you?

I'd love to hear that.

So we're talking about our goals.

And we're talking about our contrast,

Because I have another topic I want to kind of dive into,

But I want to make sure we are in alignment,

Co creating together.

Because what I'm seeing in the comments is a lot of the stuff about the circle,

A lot of logistical.

So I'd love to hear a little bit about how is this resonating with you?

What kind of emotions is this information bringing up for you right now?

I love it.

Thank you all for supporting each other within the comments that that's another part of this community that I absolutely love so much that we're always here supporting each other again.

I'm up here teaching,

But you are also co creating and communicating with each other together.

The contrasts are the struggles.

Yes,

The struggles,

The challenges,

The things that happen and we we we want to go Why did this happen to me?

They're the the quote unquote bad things that happened to you?

Yes,

Buddy.

Yes.

Does the TV turned off downstairs?

Okay.

So yes,

The contrasts are the struggles are the things that we look at.

And this is a challenge.

I've got to work through this.

This happened to me.

Yeah,

Love this.

Nicky loving the light and accepting the dark as part of life and transition.

Yep.

Susan,

I go to the chiropractor to align my body makes perfect sense to align my mind.

I work for chiropractor.

So yes.

This makes me feel like a weight is lifted without the burden of a resolution.

You do not need to know the answer to your solution right now.

That's the beauty of this is my goal is not to know exactly where I'm going.

But as long as I'm constantly aligned with my inner being,

I know I'm going in the right direction.

Because my inner being always knows the best way to get where I want to be.

And they know how to my inner being knows how to get there with the least resistance possible.

So as long as I'm continuing to follow that,

I'm golden,

I'm done.

And I also need to embrace the contrast.

So let me share a story with you all.

And Rosemary,

I'm so glad you found the group.

So recently,

Less than a month ago,

I was in a pretty bad car accident with my kids in the car.

My car was totaled.

It's been a very stressful,

Challenging last couple of weeks.

That is a contrast in my life.

It is showing me something and helping me gain more clarity.

It's it's really been challenging for me,

I've had to really dive deep into how I don't know why this happened.

I don't know how it happened.

It was a fleet and utter accident.

What what things do I need to look at?

I don't have the answers of what this contrast is teaching me.

But all I can do is move through all of the emotions that come up.

So for me,

It's not on the board anymore.

But I'm spending a ton of time just listening to my emotions and saying,

How am I feeling right now?

And that's what a big part of this book,

The 90 seconds to a life you love talks about accepting your emotions,

Accepting the unpleasant feelings that we don't want to feel.

I've spent the last few weeks really saying,

Just feel it.

Feel the anger,

Feel the sadness,

Feel the helplessness,

Feel the despair,

Feel feel all of them and allow myself to actually feel those and then move through them.

So what happened this morning,

So I got a new car yesterday,

Worked very much in alignment to get to the car that I have.

But something happened at the dealership yesterday that wasn't sitting right with me.

And I kind of was pushing it down,

Pushing it down yesterday.

And I'm like,

Something's not right.

Something doesn't feel right.

I tried to ignore it.

And I woke up this morning at 415 in the morning and a complete panic attack.

Heart was racing.

I was freaking out like my physical body was in panic.

I was not going to go back to sleep.

So what did I do?

I recognized it.

Going back to that screen before I acknowledged it.

I acknowledged it.

Okay,

Something's happening.

I don't like the way this feeling.

What do I do now?

And I know from all of my teachings and everything that I work through and read about and listen to that I can't get to a solution from the state that I'm in currently.

So I was not going to find a solution from a panic state.

So I got up,

I left my bed,

I walked down the hallway and kitchen,

Turned on the lights because something clicked on like I need to go look at something.

There was a paper that I had,

I need to dive deeper into this.

I couldn't find the paper.

And in the process of going through all of this,

My heart is racing.

My physical body is having a complete and utter fight or flight reaction.

I was in panic.

I was feeling my physical body was feeling like there was danger upon me.

So I sat down and I did a tap in.

And I did EFT.

And I tapped,

Tapped,

Tapped,

And then I meditated and then I tapped some more and I still don't have a full on solution.

But what I was able to do in that moment was I was able to acknowledge how I was feeling.

And this goes back to not having a resolution.

I acknowledged how I was feeling.

I was aware of it.

And I took action to say,

What is the next step that I can do right now?

What can I do right now?

Well,

I can't get a I can't get to a solution from the state that I'm in.

So step A is to calm down my body and move through this panic attack right now.

EFT helped me to do that.

I came from an eight to four.

And then I meditated.

And then I did another tapping that took me from a four to practically a zero.

It was really,

Really incredible.

And I just allowed myself to feel it.

And I have one central solution that's sitting on my mind.

I'm like,

I think that might make me feel better.

But I can't get to the solution from the state of panic.

So I had to do step A.

That's all I could do.

I couldn't think about what is Z,

What is going to be the ultimate outcome from this situation?

I don't know.

And there's still as I talk about it,

I'm like,

Well,

There's still a little bit of panic,

Because I'm not really sure what to do.

But if I were to take action from a state that's out of alignment,

That may not being aligned with my inner being because my inner being knows the solution to this situation,

My inner being knows the solution.

And this contrast is going to bring me more clarity on something else in my life that I'm desiring.

This is my life experience.

So I'm going to make act take action.

And I'm going to make a decision on a solution when I feel in alignment with my inner being,

Because my inner being knows the way of least resistance.

If I push,

And I take action,

When it doesn't quite feel right,

It's not going to work out,

I'm going to end up getting more contracts,

Which is fine,

Because then that maybe means I don't have full clarity,

And I need more contrast.

I don't feel I'm going to end up here.

So I'm really going to spend a lot of time just making sure I'm connected to my inner being and saying,

What's the next best solution for me?

And how do I get that solution,

I get that solution by aligning by figuring and listening.

And then once I listen,

Feel I get into that aligned vibration,

That action step that I need to hear is going to come to me.

And then I'm going to take that action.

Or I could go and just take any action and take 10 of them and get more contrast,

It'll still bring me to my ultimate outcome,

But it's going to be a whole lot harder to spend time down here than to spend time up here.

So again,

I don't know the solution.

But I'm living it and I'm saying,

Well,

This contrast is bringing me more clarity.

How do I want to work through this contrast,

I want to work through it by being aligned with my inner being,

Because that's where the best,

The best decisions are going to come from that.

So Susan says she can't see the bottom of the whiteboard.

There's not really much on it.

I the whole screen is down pretty far.

So yeah,

Oh,

Teachers are human and struggling as well.

Yeah.

No,

No one's a fan.

But you know what,

Kathleen?

You came to this earth to experience struggles.

Because struggles are a part of that.

We're human.

If we didn't have struggles,

We wouldn't be here on this earth.

Yes,

It brings us more clarity.

So yeah,

And I'm happy to share that example.

I was like,

Is this going to be come up today?

Or is this going to be something that comes up later on?

But it was something that came up.

So this is where we are.

We have our goals,

We have all the things.

But ultimately,

We want these goals,

Because they're aligned with our inner being,

They're our desires.

Even in the beginning,

I'm gonna try to move this over a little bit,

Maybe there's a glare.

I lost my train of thought.

That's okay.

So yeah.

So what do we do?

How do we get to the next step?

So my husband even came to me today.

And I said,

You know,

I had my little panic attack,

I worked through it.

And then I told him about it.

And I said,

Did what I shared with you bring?

Like,

How did that make you feel?

Like,

Did it?

Did it cause a reaction in you?

I am not responsible for that reaction.

Old me would have said,

Oh,

My God,

Don't share this with him,

He's gonna completely panic and freak out.

But his reaction is not my responsibility.

I felt so much better once I shared it with him.

And once I shared it,

He was able to share with me some kind of things that are going on with him.

And essentially,

He's just overwhelmed.

He's like,

I've got this and this,

This,

This,

These are all the things that I need to do.

Your keyboard was the reason I'm glad it all worked out.

Yeah.

Often we teach what we most need to learn.

Ain't that the truth?

So true.

And you know,

It's funny,

I actually had some things kind of come up to and I'm like,

Well,

I have to do all of this stuff.

And the kids have a play date today.

And then tomorrow is my my older son's birthday.

And then Fridays,

New Year's Eve.

And it's like,

Holy crap,

Now this this week off is almost over.

And there were things that I need to get done that didn't get done.

And again,

I'm not going to find clarity in that space.

So I was even thinking today,

My husband was going through his list of things that he's like,

I have all these things that are kind of on my mind,

And I don't know where to start.

And I don't know where to go.

Don't do struggles,

Do challenges.

It's whatever word feels good to you see,

Everybody has struggles,

Everybody has challenges,

You have to do what you have to your words have to you have to use the words that resonate most with you.

So I love that you share that as well that we can call them struggles,

We can call them challenges.

To me,

They're both the same.

I'm living,

I'm going through a struggle,

Which is challenging me,

And I'm going to be better in the end for it.

So yeah.

So let's look at this and say,

What,

What is it that we need to do?

Great,

Nikki,

This is awesome.

You told me who do I want to be?

And how do I get I want to be in alignment and then from alignment,

All my things are going to come to me.

Awesome.

How?

But what is practically,

Logically,

What do I do next?

And this is kind of where my husband's comment comes in,

Like his overwhelm it.

And I kept thinking,

Don't coach him.

We do this to each other all the time,

Because he does coaching as well.

And it's always like,

Do you need advice?

Or do you want me to just listen?

Because I kind of have some thoughts for you,

Because he even gave me a suggestion for the solution today.

And I was like,

I don't need a solution.

I just,

I will figure this out.

I don't need you to figure it out for me.

I just had the week off didn't get some sun panic too.

But we did get things done.

We just have to remember that we're human and we do the best that we can.

And maybe our intention for this week wasn't maybe we set,

You know,

We set our expectations too much to be too much,

You know.

So preparing for 2022,

What do we logistically do now that we're like,

Great,

I have all this really like,

High flying high spirited,

Who am I being doo doo doo doo doo all of these things?

Where does the actual action?

So what I want you to really think about,

I really want you to take time to answer those those really important three,

Three questions,

Right?

We,

We,

I want you to really think about those questions.

Who do I want to be?

So who do I want to be?

Here's what I have to go look at something real quick.

Because I want to say this to you in a way that is clear.

So I just need to look at,

I just need to look at something.

So who do I want to be?

The next question?

And I think the most,

The next most important question?

Hold on,

I'm going back to the page.

Okay.

Okay.

If we're going to ask,

Take any of the three questions,

Who do I want to be?

Where do I want to be?

And what do I want to be doing the who,

Where or what?

Right?

You have the who,

Who,

What?

So we're going to take those who,

Where,

And what questions?

Right?

We're going to take those three questions.

Who,

Where and what?

And then the next question we want to ask ourselves is,

I'm thinking of the right phrase,

But I know the phrasing doesn't really matter.

So what I'm going to say is,

I'm going to ask this question,

How am I going to get there?

So I have the who,

What,

Where,

Who,

Where,

What,

I mixed up those questions,

That's going to bother me.

And purposefully,

Who,

What,

Where,

When,

When is not on there.

When is not a question on there,

Because that is not a question we can answer.

That is a question the universe will give to us.

So the next question from these three that I want you to ask yourself is,

How am I going to get there?

And there's no one,

This is multiple answers.

Because what this is going to do,

And this is an action.

This is potential.

Right?

We want to think about potential possibilities.

Yeah,

Not usually right this close to this side.

Yeah,

Sorry,

This real small,

You guys are gonna be set.

So it's multiple answers,

And it's the potential possibilities.

I know you guys can't see that.

I apologize.

My bad.

I have to remind myself,

I don't always need to fix it when a partner is discussing an issue that it's huge.

And it's a it's a learning curve.

I am a fixer to Dave,

It has freaky gotten me into trouble.

Just listen.

Yes.

And it's easier when you have access to the proper access to the proper tools.

Yeah,

We don't need to fix it.

So one of the things that I really get out of a lot of what I do,

Is I embrace it,

I tried to fix I've talked about this before.

Dave,

I know you've definitely probably heard this before,

But I say it's been around for a little while on my life.

For like the first two,

Three years,

My husband was going through a really,

Really depressive state.

And it was really hard on our family,

It was very hard on me.

And for the first probably two years,

I tried to fix it,

I tried to say just stay positive,

Everything will be okay,

Come on,

We'll get through this.

And what I learned is I actually took a step back.

So if you listened,

Or were here for part two,

I went through a whole timeline of 2016,

I started my business 2018,

My life really kind of collapsed in on itself and things needed to change.

And it was really in that 2017 2018 timeframe,

Where I said,

I can no longer help you.

I need to help myself.

And I was constantly trying to fix.

And I had to stop fixing.

And that was probably one of the hardest things I had to do.

So I actually made a commitment and said,

I'm not going to ask him how he's doing.

I'm not gonna say,

Hey,

How are you feeling today?

How I did and I stopped asking him,

Because all I felt like I was doing was a I felt like I was enabling him and allowing him to continue to feel bad.

But I was also not allowing him to heal himself.

And I didn't know that at the time,

It was a really hard struggle for me.

But what came out of that was,

The moment I stopped asking,

Within months,

He started doing changes on his own,

It was we started seeing the same chiropractor who does a lot of energy work and healing.

I started in March of 2018.

I did not tell my husband to go I maybe encouraged him.

In July of 2018.

He showed he walked through those doors on his own without any prompting from me.

He signed up with a coach.

In January of 2019.

I had nothing to do with that.

He did that on his own.

And it's that continual process of allowing him to go through his own growth,

Not needing to fix him,

Allowing him to feel his emotions because I need to feel mine.

So it is being a fixer is very challenging.

That's a little side story for all of you fixers out there.

So this question of how am I going to get there?

This isn't what actions am I going to take today?

No,

No,

No.

What are the potential possibilities?

What this does is list list all the potential of like,

Get there by doing this,

I can get there by doing this,

I could do this,

I could.

So even this morning,

As I was going through my struggle,

It was like,

Why could you know,

Do a,

Like could do that that feels really good.

Or I could also do this.

And even one of my husband's solution is something that came up in my mind,

Like,

If I had to return the cart,

But I do that.

And I'm like,

I bet you I could I bet you there's some sort of like 30 day guarantee that can get you out of it.

They don't share that with you.

But I bet you there is if I asked for it.

So all of these things,

I was like,

I'm not gonna and I already made a decision.

I'm not going to take action today.

There's too much going on today.

But if I were to take action,

It will be action that was out of alignment.

And I don't want to take action out of alignment.

I have the time and the patience to sit and once I feel that next,

I have an idea of what the next step is going to be,

But I'm going to sit with it.

And I'm going to meditate on it again.

I'm going to go is this the right thing?

And how can I do this?

And what can that look like?

And instead of jumping into it,

This is my thing,

I jump.

And then I'm like,

Then I gotta like retract.

So what I do now is I don't,

I still take the action,

But I sometimes take a little bit longer of a pause.

I used to take no pause,

And I would just react.

So my goal now is to respond,

And to really contemplate and think about what that next action step is.

And that's what you're doing here with this question.

What are the potential possibilities?

And as you list all those multiple answers,

Those potential possibilities,

You start to open up your mind and go,

Oh,

My God,

There is more than one way to this solution.

And that's what I'm saying.

You have a problem.

The reason you have a goal is because you have a problem in your life.

It's not exactly how you want it.

So you have this goal in mind.

And sometimes we can be too narrow with our goals.

Don't be too narrow with your goal.

Be open and be flexible.

Oh,

Thank you,

Dave.

Dave says,

I really appreciate you and your husband's story at Resonate.

Yeah,

Yeah,

The life changer.

So this is a really beautiful question.

But I don't feel like you need to take action on the answers that you come up with.

And no,

You better have a list of like,

More than five solutions.

And there are more solutions than you can think of in this very moment.

So you come up with this and you're like,

Oh,

I could get to somebody give me an example.

Give me an example of who you want to be where you want to go and maybe like two or three ideas of how you might potentially get there.

I don't know where I'm going with this.

This is all in my head.

So somebody can put in the comments,

Who's who's feels good and was willing to share it doesn't even have to be something that's you but I feel like I need an example.

And I want to pull an example from from all of you rather than another one coming for me.

I think I've talked enough about me,

I don't feel like I need to go there anymore.

I probably will.

But there's nothing that's kind of popping up out of my head to give you as an example.

But somebody give me a problem you're having.

And maybe some solutions.

So whether it's a goal,

I want to make a certain income next year,

I want to do this,

I want to do that.

How to get there finishing claim your power,

Right?

But where is it that you're trying to go?

I think that's what I'm asking.

Somebody give me a goal,

Something they're reaching towards something that's on their vision board that they have for the future next year,

Whenever,

Give me something there.

And then I want to kind of dive through and start talking about some potential possibilities.

That's what I'm looking for.

I need more organization,

I want to get a new job with a position that allows for more work life balance,

Need more organization need to be a better writer,

Learning more about my ADHD.

Awesome.

All right.

So now what I want you guys to do is we can sit up here and talk about it.

But provide some opportunities for some possibilities for these folks who are putting stuff in the chat.

How can they get to where they're going to go?

Because I guarantee you,

You have a thought or an idea that maybe they haven't thought of yet.

Daily,

And with my finances.

Yep.

Plan for post retirement career.

Okay,

These are all beautiful.

I want you guys to start with this.

I got to move this over because I feel like I'm leaning off the board.

I'm going to erase it anyway.

I just won't go towards the end anymore.

Right?

So what to help each other be a part of this conversation.

Someone wants,

You know,

Someone wants to be a better writer,

Somebody else preparing for their retirement.

What are some potential possibilities that could get them to the solution that they want?

Cooking more at home and saving money.

Susan wants to learn more about her ADHD.

Okay,

So let's actually go there.

Susan,

I feel like there's what are some ways that you could learn more about your ADHD?

What are some possibilities?

Right?

Oh,

What are some next steps that you could take?

I want to write my first book.

Me too.

I this it's here.

It's not fully in alignment and the vision isn't 1000% yet,

But it's,

It's there and it's in the vortex.

Looking for a second job working at home,

New home involves moving.

Yeah,

What are cooking at home?

So what are some things?

What?

Remember yesterday,

We talked about step one.

What is your step one?

These are really broad.

I want to learn about my ADHD.

When you go to sit down and talk about it.

You're like,

What?

What do I really need to do?

Well,

I guess I could.

And then we get overwhelmed and we freeze.

We don't do anything because we're like,

I just actually don't know what to do.

So let's think of some ideas.

Writing my first book but getting done.

Learn more by reading library books on the topic.

Let me I'm gonna go one step further or one step backwards actually back and say,

I need to go to the library.

And I need to search books on ADHD or I need to go online,

Look at some books on ADHD and then see what my library has.

Think we want to go micro,

Micro steps.

Right?

We don't need to take micro steps.

What can I do in the next 30 seconds that's going to get me there.

But what my husband said to me was he was even feeling so super overwhelmed.

And he said,

You know what,

Just gonna keep taking my 15 minutes a day and just moving forward.

And he's taking these,

He's,

He's working to start like a coaching business,

But he doesn't have the full vision of it yet.

So it gets really overwhelmed.

He's like,

I don't know what to do next.

I said,

That's because your vision isn't 100% clear yet.

So you know,

He'll do little things.

He's like,

Well,

I set up my email address.

And I put on my,

My coaching email addresses now on my phone.

So I have them on my phone,

Or I set it up a new Facebook profile that's going to be just for my coaching.

Like,

That's awesome.

You don't need to have the full solution,

Just do something.

But micro micro steps,

You don't need to take these big giant leaps.

Every time you have a goal or a decision.

It's micro.

In 2018,

When I wanted to change my life,

And I want it better work life balance,

My micro step was to meditate on a daily basis.

That was it.

I couldn't do any more than that.

Yeah.

Granular,

Micro small,

It has to be micro.

What about asking specifically?

What are the questions?

Oh,

Beautiful.

Kathleen,

See,

You guys are helping each other.

New cookbook.

Yes.

Oh,

My God,

Look at that.

What was your micro step?

Not sure who your Ellen who you're asking that to and micro step about what?

So I apologize.

Was that when I was talking about meditation took a micro step.

I'm spending tons of time in podcasts,

Insight timer.

Awesome.

And as you're doing that,

Are you getting other inspirational things?

But I could do this,

Do this next.

Oh,

My micro step literally was meditating.

And then my other what came from that was,

This is the only thing I'm going to focus on and concentrate on.

I'm going to maybe do some other things outside of that.

But this was number one,

And it was to sit and meditate for 30 days,

Five minutes a day,

30 days done.

I was doing it no matter what didn't know what was going to happen,

Completely aligned action because it was truly and utterly inspired.

And then what came from that was I was in a network marketing company at the time.

And I said,

Well,

Let me make sure I'm going to hop on at least one call a week.

And I was journaling and I was doing these calls.

And then,

You know,

Two,

Three months in,

I'm like,

I'm starting to feel out of alignment again,

I got that contrast.

I was in alignment,

I took action.

And then all of a sudden,

The action I was taking,

I was like,

Well,

This no longer feels good.

I'm getting contrast.

What's next?

So then I take another little micro step.

And after that,

It was my want to leave my full time job.

But this network marketing thing,

Just something something's missing.

Something's not right.

I don't know exactly what it is.

So maybe what are some other possibilities that I could do?

So I started,

I went online and I looked up part time job.

What are some part time jobs in my field that I could find,

I found a bunch of jobs.

I went on interviews,

None of those worked out.

Okay,

Awesome,

Got more contrast,

Gain more clarity,

And then these things just progress and move.

So hopefully that's a little helpful.

Yeah.

Facebook support group to Susan,

What are you talking about?

I'm kind of like lost in conversations.

Not sure if that was anything for me or just something for somebody else.

Yep.

Yep,

I love this.

Oh,

I'm sorry,

I should be reading.

I'm literally reading what infinite said to Susan,

Starting as small as you can get and then moving forward in my experience and help to really focus on the small steps first and gave me a sense of accomplishment.

Yes,

There's a there is joy and excitement in that sense of accomplishment.

Somebody is saying to Summer Star who wants to cook more cooking prep day per week?

Yes.

If I can suggest an IT teacher that focuses on ADHD.

Awesome,

Dave.

See,

That's awesome.

Oh,

Susan found a Facebook support group.

That's amazing.

That's where we need to start.

And then what's going to happen is those micro granular micro steps are going to get bigger and bigger.

But just as infinite said,

You need to start small.

And then you need to take those micro steps.

And then you need to pay attention to the contrast.

So then you need to review and reflect.

You need to review and reflect.

Because there is no one answer.

And you might have taken an action step that wasn't,

It's gonna ultimately get to you to your goal,

But it's might likely going to cause some more contrast,

Because contrast is life.

And we're always learning and contrast is always creating more clarity for us.

So we're going to review and reflect.

And here are some additional questions you can ask yourself as you're reflecting on your steps is what did I learn?

And I apologize,

This is pretty small.

I can also put this in the group as well.

What did I learn?

What went well?

And what can I do differently?

Okay.

Review and reflect what went well?

What did I learn?

What went well?

And what can I do differently?

These are powerful questions.

You take action,

And then you reflect and do these,

Then you know,

You're in the process.

And you're open to contrast because you're saying,

Well,

This didn't go well,

But I learned this,

Oh,

This went really well,

I want to do more of that,

That felt really good.

What went well?

And what can I do differently?

Okay,

This didn't work out quite as I want it.

But let me do it.

Let me shift and move.

I do this.

Most of the time I have,

I didn't do it in December.

I set up three manifestations that I'm really focused on for the month ahead.

And then I actually asked those questions of where am I now?

Where do I want to be?

What do I need to get there?

Those are the three questions I initially asked myself.

And then at the end of the month,

I go back and I answer these two questions.

I didn't do this for December.

I didn't do this every single month of the year.

I did this the majority of the month.

And that's okay.

I'm still moving forward.

I'm still learning.

I'm still doing the work.

So my goal for next year is to do this more,

Commit more to doing this every single month.

When we start a new year,

We're like,

What's,

You know,

I'm going to start in January and then I'm gonna make,

Ooh,

What's December of 2022 going to look like at the end?

Do it small.

One week at a time,

One month at a time,

One day at a time,

One hour at a time.

So summer starts looking to cook more.

What does more mean?

It's more like,

Let me just simply start with one day a week.

I'm going to cook a really nice big Sunday dinner for my family because that would bring me a lot of joy.

Done.

Do that one micro thing.

It's like anything when you start a new year's resolution and people want to lose weight,

Right?

That's the thing.

I want to get healthy.

So I'm going to go to the gym five days a week for 30 minutes a day.

That's probably too much if you're starting at zero.

What's your micro step?

I'm going to put my workout clothes out and get them ready for the day.

I'm going to go for a walk three days a week.

I'm going to schedule it.

I'm going to plan it micro steps.

Don't overdo it.

There's a lot happening in the comments,

Which I love.

Oh,

Thank you.

My enthusiasm makes you giggle.

Thank you.

I do get very excited and you know what?

I woke up today completely and utterly out of alignment,

But I knew,

Hey,

I wanted to be in alignment for all of you.

And I knew coming here would put me in full alignment too.

I struggle to keep going.

I can start,

But then I don't finish my tasks and start a new one.

Oh,

You have shiny objects in here on Maya.

Very likely.

Awesome.

Oh,

Dave.

I'm so glad you're connecting with Susan.

Maya,

Have you tried breaking your tasks down into smaller parts and approaching it that way?

A step could determine what specific foods.

And Oh,

Yep.

You guys are just giving each other more suggestions.

I love it.

Okay.

So let's talk about that.

Shiny objects and drugs that you're getting stuck.

You do a little bit and then you're kind of like,

Eh,

I'm done.

I'm bored.

Right.

You get bored.

And I think that accomplishment I just read it in the comments,

But having that sense of accomplishment really will keep you moving forward.

Yes.

The set a timer for 15 minutes and then stop.

I have done that as well.

If it is too big,

Do one item.

Yes.

I love shiny.

Yes.

Get bored.

Okay.

So if you get bored and I will post this stuff in the circle,

Cause that's actually in my planner.

So I can easily go back and redo that for you guys.

I will just post all those questions.

What I do for my monthly manifestations.

So you get shiny objects and grow,

Right?

You start,

You stop like I'm bored.

What I want you to do is know your why.

If you know your why,

Because if you've got a goal,

Sometimes doing things,

It can be kind of boring and it's not always fun,

But you're like,

I need,

This is the next step.

And it's really hard.

And maybe I'm afraid to take the step.

Know your why and understand this again,

Goes back to that awareness and acknowledgement of how do I want to use the word understanding or be aware of.

I don't know how do I want to put this?

I'm just going to do,

No,

That doesn't.

Why are you resisting?

Why are you resisting?

Cause the fact that you're not taking the next step says that you're resisting.

Why are you resisting the next step?

And my initial thought without knowing you,

Talking to you,

Actually coaching with you is fear.

And it could be a fear of judgment,

Fear of failure,

Fear of ridicule.

Something is stopping you.

But when you are so solid on your why,

And you're so confident in it,

That comes from alignment,

By the way,

Confident in your why and in your decisions comes from being in alignment.

Cause there's no question.

You're like,

I know this is what I'm supposed to do.

Like I knew buying that car yesterday was exactly what I was supposed to do.

And I woke up this morning,

Like,

Why am I going back on it?

Because there was one little piece that's just not sitting right.

And I just need to dive a little bit further.

What will keep me from taking action on making that phone call,

Sending that email,

Sending that text to say,

Hey,

I want to have a deeper conversations.

I have more questions on,

On the lease agreement.

It's fear.

Is it going to work out?

Am I going to get the answer that I want?

Are they going to be like,

This lady's crazy.

She's got issues.

Are they going to start talking about me,

Judging me?

That's what's going to stop me.

But when I'm so confident in my alignment,

And that's why I want to make sure I'm aligned before I take any action,

This is there,

But it's taken a backseat and I can keep my why going.

So what is being really,

Truly honest with yourself?

Why are you not moving forward?

Why are you procrastinating?

Why are you not doing the thing that you know you need to do?

You've hit it for me.

I'm stuck here.

Yeah.

Sorry.

I'm just reading some of the comments.

Teeny tiny steps to help you get your goals,

Especially if overwhelmed.

You guys are funny.

Fear of not doing it perfectly.

You're not going to do it perfectly.

You are not.

And you have to own that.

I'm currently reading this infinite immunity to change by Lisa Leahy and Robert Keegan.

I have not read it.

And if anybody else has any comments on it,

Please share.

I'm always looking for new books to read.

Trying to sell old books as an example,

Get out old books to sort and listen.

Awesome.

Actually,

That's something I'd love to do.

We have bought,

Like you guys can't see,

You see this bookshelf,

But there's a pile of books underneath it.

There's a pile of books on the other side of the room.

We have so many books that we don't,

You know,

We read them once,

You know,

Some are worth keeping,

But some we don't need to keep.

So I know that's something that's on my mind to clean up the office as well.

So yeah.

So knowing what's holding you back and if it's a fear of perfection,

Saying,

I'm afraid of perfection.

Now,

Instead of taking the action step,

Work on the fear.

Why am I fear?

Is this fear true?

Right?

We asked this question the other day.

Is this fear of perfection?

Because guess what,

If you've got this fear and your fear is running the show,

You're gonna stay stuck.

So asking your question around fear.

Why?

Why?

I think I want to ask what,

Because you want to name your fear,

Give it a name,

Right?

What am I afraid of?

I have a fear of perfection.

If I'm not,

If I'm not perfect,

What will happen?

Right?

Why am I so afraid of this?

Why am I afraid of fear?

And if you're really having issues with emotions,

This book that I talked about earlier is going to be really helpful for you,

Because it talks about a lot of the times that keep us from,

From holding back is because we're so afraid of feeling unpleasant emotions.

So if we have a fear of perfection,

Maybe there's a fear of people will judge me,

People will ridicule me,

And that will make me feel embarrassed and shameful.

And I don't want to be vulnerable in that way.

Think about it.

Is it simply because you don't want to feel bad?

Learning to embrace these unpleasant emotions helps you move through them.

So I highly recommend this book.

Awesome.

So immunity to change is a book about a process of discovery about what's preventing you from changing moving forward.

Awesome.

That's cool.

I feel like it's very in line with everything you're speaking about.

Thank you for sharing the book.

I'm going to put it on my list.

Ellen says I did a workshop with a trained immunity to change person.

I'm still trying to wrap my head around.

Awesome.

Oh,

Just missed the book.

Oh yeah,

We posted about this is the one from earlier too.

90 seconds to a life you love.

And again,

This is in the group as well.

Take five.

That's awesome.

Five minute test.

Do it.

We talked about this in the procrastination talk,

Which you can go and listen to the procrastination talk on insight timer.

I have a track on a whole live session we did on procrastination.

So yeah.

Oh,

You're welcome,

Patty.

All right,

Guys.

We're at the hour point.

There is so much more we could dive into,

But I'm going to end here.

And you guys,

If you have more questions,

You want to dive deeper into anything.

I have a few moments.

I'm happy to hang out for a little bit longer.

But for those listening to the recording,

I am going to end it.

Thank you so much for being a part of this,

For sharing your comments,

For being open for sharing with each other and giving each other the support that they need upon his fourth session,

Possibly we'll have to wait and see.

Maybe that's in the new year for that first live of the new year.

So I love that you guys are asking for more.

That means a whole lot to me.

But thank you so much for being here.

And I look,

Come join the group,

Join the circle,

Be a part of it.

Thank you guys so much.