What happens when we crack open our hearts just a little bit more than we're used to?
What happens when we feel things beneath the surface and tap into some deeper,
Maybe more intense emotions?
How can we be with them when the feeling of them is so strong?
Do we feel like we're going to crumble,
Fall apart,
Lose control?
I'd like to share with you a method for working with intense emotions.
Developed by Michelle McDonald,
She uses this acronym called RAIN.
So when a strong feeling comes up,
We move into RAIN.
The R standing for recognizing the feeling.
A meaning we allow it to be there.
I stands for investigating and doing that with some kindness,
Of course.
And then ending up with some nurturing.
So let's just explore for these moments together.
A heavy emotion.
And when I say heavy emotion,
Let's not go for the heaviest thing you can think of.
Maybe on a scale of one to ten,
It's like a six,
Ten being the most intense.
So for right now,
Think of a time when you felt something strongly.
It may even be a time where you might have reacted in a way that you wish you hadn't with this emotion.
Maybe a time where you felt really angry or upset.
Or in despair.
We're just going to touch into this emotion without feeling it entirely again.
We're not trying to trigger anything.
But just recognizing it to begin with.
And the way that we can recognize that we're feeling something is just saying to ourselves,
Right now it feels like this.
Right now,
It feels like this.
Right now,
It feels like this.
Right now,
I'm angry.
And you may even be able to notice in the body how that usually feels,
Even if you can't in this moment.
But normally when I'm angry,
I feel a clenching in my stomach.
I'm gonna allow I'm gonna allow this feeling to be there without judging it,
Feeling the need to change it,
Turn it into something positive or different or create any story around it.
I'm gonna just take a breath and allow it to be there.
And then I'm gonna look closer.
I'm going to investigate this big emotion.
Why am I feeling angry?
Why am I feeling angry?
Why am I feeling angry?
Why am I feeling angry?
Why am I feeling angry?
Why am I feeling angry?
What is this anger pointing towards?
Is there something beneath it?
Just asking these questions with kindness and curiosity.
And there doesn't have to be an answer right away.
It can just be a questioning.
Why this?
Why now?
What does this mean?
And then arriving at some nurturing.
Nurturing to be.
Nurturing can be reminding yourself that it is okay to feel whatever it is you're feeling.
Nurturing can mean holding yourself in a hug or relaxing the body.
With a sigh.
Nurturing can mean speaking about this strong feeling with a loved one.
Or simply asking,
What do I need right now with this emotion?
So whatever feeling you were working with right then,
Just letting that relax and disappear,
Fade away.
And knowing that whenever it shows up again,
We can have this strategy,
This tool of rain,
We can rain upon it.
It may not entirely shift the charge of the emotion,
But it might soften.
And to end,
We might just sort of encourage this image of rain,
A soft rain,
Coming down,
Coming down on ourselves with this intense feeling in our hearts,
And letting this soft,
Soft,
Soft,
Soft,
Soft,
Soft,
Soft,
Soft,
Soft,
Soft,
Soft,
Soft,
With this intense feeling in our hearts,
And letting this soft rain just melt it,
Melt it away.
