There's a wound many of us carry around money.
And most of the time we don't even know it's there.
It doesn't shout.
It just shapes us,
Quietly,
Unconsciously.
Until one day we look at our lives and ask,
Why does it always come and go?
Why does money feel so hard to hold?
Why do I feel guilt when I receive money?
For me,
The wound came from two places.
In my family,
We didn't talk about money.
There was no healthy modeling,
No teaching,
No open conversations.
My mother was the one who controlled money,
Gave it conditionally,
Used it as a means to earn gratitude or compliance.
Gifts came with expectations,
Even if unspoken.
And that taught me early on that money is never given freely.
It always comes at a cost.
My father,
On the other hand,
Was generous.
He gave with love,
Without condition,
But also without structure.
He never planned,
Never held.
And so while his generosity felt safe,
It wasn't sustainable.
What I learned was this.
Money either has strings or it vanished.
And so,
Unconsciously,
I began to believe that not having money at all was safer than receiving it and risking what might follow.
I gave it away.
I avoided it,
Even as I longed for it to stay.
That pattern followed me for years,
In business,
In relationships,
Until recently I saw it fully.
Not with shame,
But with compassion.
And that changed everything.
This meditation is for you,
If you sense that something in your story with money doesn't make sense.
If it's always slipping through your fingers,
Or never really felt like yours to begin with.
Maybe for you it looks different.
Perhaps a parent who worked constantly but never felt it was enough.
A household where money was never spoken of.
Or a family where love and money were tightly tangled.
Let's go gently.
Let's go together.
Let your breath begin to slow.
Let your body soften.
You are safe here.
You are not alone in this exploration.
Imagine yourself walking through a gentle landscape.
One that feels both ancient and familiar.
The light is soft,
The air is still.
You follow a winding path and with each step you move deeper into the field of your soul memory.
Ahead of you is a circle of chairs.
And seated in them are those who came before you.
Some you may know.
Grandparents,
Parents,
Family.
Others you've possibly never met or only sense through energy.
You are not here to judge them.
You are here to witness.
As you walk around this circle,
You begin to see how many lived in their lives.
You may see images,
Emotions,
Conversations.
Perhaps a grandmother who saved obsessively out of fear.
An uncle who gambled away everything.
A mother who used money to control.
A father who gave freely but left nothing behind.
A line of women who were never allowed to earn.
A line of men who tied their worth to what they provided.
Pause at each presence.
Let them show you what they carried.
Let the story unfold.
Not to hurt you but to free you.
Some may hand you an object,
A coin,
A contract,
A lock.
Some may offer you words.
Others only silence.
Whatever comes,
Receive it.
Not as a burden but as a truth finally ready to be seen.
Now take some time in silence.
Let yourself notice what is being shown or given to you.
You may receive words,
Images,
Emotions or perhaps only stillness.
Trust that whatever arises is exactly what your soul is ready for.
Allow yourself to listen,
To receive.
And if what they hand you or handed you is heavy,
Notice that you can also give it back.
You are free to choose to keep what strengthens you and return what is no longer yours to carry.
You may begin or have begun to feel how this wound has travelled through generations.
Not out of malice but from pain.
Not to punish but because no one had yet stopped long enough to heal it.
And now you are the one who can.
As you take your place in the circle,
The others look at you.
Not with blame but with gratitude.
Because you are the one who chose to see,
To remember,
To break the cycle.
Stay here with me.
Let your body feel the truth of what you've seen.
Let your heart soften.
This is where the healing begins.
For many of us this wound has shaped our whole lives and we didn't even know it.
We made decisions without knowing what was driving them.
We played small.
We overgave.
We undercharged.
We avoided.
We clung.
We judged ourselves for not having more,
Not doing more,
Not being more.
And yet,
How could we?
We were carrying something that wasn't ours to begin with.
So take a breath.
Let it be deep.
And let yourself feel this.
You have done nothing wrong.
You are not late.
You have not wasted time.
You did not fail.
This wound has been running in silence for so long.
And the very fact that you are here now,
Witnessing it,
Naming it,
Means you are already the one who is breaking the cycle.
And yes,
It's alright to grieve the time it took to feel the ache of,
Why didn't I see this sooner?
So allow this truth to land.
You couldn't have seen it until now.
Because now you are strong enough to hold what it means.
You are not behind.
You are right on time.
I used to think that my mother handed me a curse.
That her control around money her conditions,
Her withholding were wounds I'd carry forever.
And now I see it differently.
She didn't hand me a curse.
She handed me a contract.
A sacred soul agreement to find my way back to freedom.
To learn that I don't need approval to be worthy.
And that the power she tried to hold over me was actually waiting to be claimed within me.
Her conditions became my clarity.
Her withholding became my threshold.
Her control became my sovereignty.
I see now,
This was not punishment.
This was initiation.
And what once felt like my deepest challenge is now my greatest victory.
You too can choose to see your wound this way.
Not as your prison,
But as the forge of your freedom.
Not as your shame,
But as your gold.
Take a moment to reflect.
What might your wound be teaching you about your own strength?
Let's speak this now.
Not just as an affirmation,
But as a declaration.
I invite you to repeat aloud or softly in your heart and let these words wrap around you like a cloak of gold.
Let them anchor into your body.
Repeat after me.
It is safe for me to receive.
It is safe for me to hold.
It is safe for me to grow and build.
It is safe for me to create lasting wealth that supports me and those I love.
It is safe for me to allow money to stay,
To circulate and to expand.
Now,
Let's say these affirmations once more.
It is safe for me to receive.
It is safe for me to hold.
It is safe for me to grow and build.
It is safe for me to create lasting wealth that supports me and those I love.
It is safe for me to allow money to stay,
To circulate and to expand.
And just to make sure we deeply anchor this new us,
This new way of seeing money and feel safe It is safe for me to receive.
It is safe for me to hold.
It is safe for me to grow and build.
It is safe for me to create lasting wealth that supports me and those I love.
It is safe for me to allow money to stay,
To circulate and to expand.
And now,
Simply listen.
Let these words be spoken to you.
A story you can just receive.
And allow this new story,
This story to weave into your own.
I have seen the wound I carried.
Not as a weakness,
But as a truth that shaped me.
I have named what was once hidden and in doing so,
I have reclaimed my power.
I forgive myself for not seeing it sooner.
I forgive those who passed it on to me.
And I thank this wound for being the place where my strength was forged.
I now see my story with money not as a struggle,
But as a sacred unfolding.
One I now choose to write with clarity,
Love and trust.
Money no longer defines me.
It flows with me.
It moves in harmony with who I am becoming.
I used to think I had to earn safety.
Now I know I don't.
I am safe in who I already am.
I used to think I had to prove my worth.
Now I remember.
My worth has never been in question.
I used to think this story would follow me forever.
Now I know I am the one who gets to end it with grace.
I am free.
I am ready.
I am whole.
As this meditation closes,
You may not feel emotional.
You may not feel euphoric.
What you may feel is quiet,
Stillness.
And please know that that calm,
That pause is not emptiness.
It is the silence of a soul clicking into place.
This is what truth feels like when it doesn't need to shout.
Because it has finally been heard.
Let this truth settle into your body.
You don't need to do anything more.
The healing has already begun.
And from here,
Your new story,
Your true story can unfold.
And finally,
Just say to yourself,
May what I have healed in myself now ripple through all lifetimes,
All timelines,
Forward and back.
May it release those who came before me and free those who are still to come.
Thank you for allowing yourself to dive deep into what might be painful,
What might have run in the background of your life.
Please feel free to stay a little bit longer.
The music will accompany you.
Sending you much love,
Light and healing.
